Joker Moon

by George R. R. Martin

  Bastet grabbed Michelle’s arm, and stopped her. “He’s getting worse, Michelle, not better.”

  “Well, what the actual fuck do you want me to do? I got Adesina to start playing games with him.”

  “Nah, Mom, I did that myself,” said Adesina. She slouched against the wall. “That’s so not on you. I didn’t have to, but, jeez, he’s just so pathetic.”

  Bastet gazed up at Michelle with her penny-colored eyes. They were the same color as Adesina’s. “Help me get him out of Old Egypt. Help me get him home to America. It’s not only that he’s ill, but so many people want him dead. Not just the Caliphate. There are factions here who want him gone forever. It’s tearing us apart. And there are other countries who would want him to go away permanently, too. He’s in so much danger.”

  “Are you kidding?” Michelle teetered between shock and full-blown amazement. “I can’t get him into the country! He’s wanted for being … for being him. Also, he blew up Pyote, Texas. Like, all of it. Not to mention New Orleans, almost. And how do you propose we get him into the country? And if as many people want him dead as you say, it’s going to be a bitch to keep that on the DL.”

  A puff of air-conditioning ruffled Bastet’s fur. She smoothed it down. “Old Egypt is a sovereign nation. We can issue official documents. We can turn Drake into anyone we want.”

  “Hasn’t that been part of his problem?” Michelle walked to the door and shoved it open. It was remarkably balmy outside. “With this whole ‘Ra’ thing. It’s bad enough he has Sekhmet in there whispering in his head, but now he’s trying to pretend that his ‘grown-up self’ is separate somehow … Christ, what a mess.”

  “And that’s why I want to get him out of the country! He has to stop all this Ra nonsense and get back to somewhere where he was just a normal person.”

  “Are you fucking kidding me?” Michelle felt as if the top of her head was about to explode. “He’s, like, the most powerful ace in the world!”

  “Mom! Language!”

  “It’s nothing you haven’t heard, and worse, from Aunt Joey.”

  Bastet stepped in front of Michelle. “But you stopped him before.”

  “That was a special circumstance.” Michelle remembered the blinding light. Drake in her arms as she fell to the ground, which collapsed around her. Then the darkness. Nothing but darkness for so long until Adesina found her. “I can control myself. He can’t.” It was a little lie. Michelle was finding it difficult to control herself these days.

  “He has Sekhmet.” Bastet grabbed Michelle by the arm. “And he has you.”

  “I have a teenage daughter to look after. I’m not going to babysit a full-grown man with mental issues. I don’t care if you can get him into the country or not. Not to mention the whole ‘everyone wants him dead’ thing.”

  “I’m pretty sure I can take care of myself, Mom,” Adesina interrupted. “And I’m not a teenager anymore.”

  Michelle rubbed her forehead. “You’re not an adult just because you think you look like one. This isn’t the place for that conversation—again.”

  Adesina rolled her eyes.

  Bastet shook Michelle. “I really thought better of you. I thought you’d care.”

  “Don’t try that manipulative bullshit on me, Bastet,” she replied. “I’m no better than anyone else.”

  “But you try to be.”

  “Look where that’s gotten me.”

  Sobek was waiting in the lobby when they got back to their hotel. He was ensconced in a comfortable-looking black leather armchair. He gestured for them to come over, then continued signing an autograph for a pair of tourists. As Michelle and Adesina came up, the man turned and breathlessly asked Michelle if she’d take a picture of the three of them. They even asked Adesina to step into the picture, too, because her joker looked so amazing, but she demurred.

  “Sure,” Michelle said as he handed his phone over. She snapped a couple of photos. One was of Sobek smiling broadly, showing his cigarette-stained teeth to great effect. She handed the phone back.

  “You do know that you just asked the Amazing Bubbles to take your photo? Yes?” Sobek asked them.

  “Oh, fer sure,” the woman said. She wore a short-sleeved loud floral-print top and a rhinestone-encrusted baseball cap. “But you can see pictures of her anywhere.”

  With that, they wandered off exclaiming on their good luck at meeting a real Living God. “Such are the vagaries of fame,” Sobek said. He lit one of his strong Turkish cigarettes and blew smoke out of his nose. It was very dragon-like.

  Michelle laughed and sat down in the chair opposite him. “That was hi-larious. And to what do we owe this honor, Great Crocodile God?” Adesina perched on the edge of the couch and continued texting.

  “That’s not as amusing as you think it is.”

  “It kinda is.”

  “I’m here because you need to do something about Ra,” he said. A haze of smoke was forming around him. It smelled pretty bad.

  “You and Bastet. Are you in cahoots?”

  “I don’t know cahoots.”

  “Did you plan this together? ‘Get Bubbles to Old Egypt and have her deal with our problem.’”

  He took another pull on his cigarette. “No. She’s none too happy with me. She’s worried about Drake, but I’m concerned about Ra. Besides, even though you saved us all those years ago, I haven’t been happy with your recent adventures.”

  Michelle ignored the shot. “Um … Ra and Drake … they’re the same person. You do know that.”

  “Of course I do!” he snapped. It was impressive given the size of his jaw and the razor-sharp teeth nestled there. Adesina glanced up for a moment, then turned her attention back to her phone. “Ra is our only defense, and he’s all too vulnerable. We need another solution.”

  “Like what? You’re behind the curve here. You don’t have a military. All you have is him.”

  “We might have another option.”

  “You mean going to the Moon? You do know that’s nuts? I mean, that’s the technical term.”

  “There’s a meeting tonight. Charles Dutton is supposed to tell us about Theodorus’s plans,” he said. “Dutton is being very coy. You should come and hear what he has to say. I’d be interested in your opinion. Your daughter, too. She might be more interested than you are. After all, she’s a joker.”

  “Joker-ace,” Adesina said, not bothering to look up from her phone. “I’m not just a joker.”

  “Ah,” Sobek said. “I see.”

  “Probably not,” Adesina replied. “But whatever.”

  Michelle stretched her legs out and slumped back in her chair. “First, I haven’t received an invitation. Second, I’m not a joker. Third, I most certainly wouldn’t bring my daughter to this insane-clown meeting. Fourth, I don’t wanna. I’m already vexed with Bastet for getting me here—and I wouldn’t have brought Adesina along if Bastet had been up front with me about this whole situation.”

  Sobek ground his cigarette out, then lit another one. Michelle’s phone pinged and she pulled it out of her pocket and found a text from Bastet inviting her and Adesina to Dutton’s meeting. “I’m feeling very popular right now,” Michelle said, wiggling her phone at Sobek. “Bastet wants us there, too. What is it with the two of you?”

  Sobek shrugged. “Great minds think alike?”

  “See, here I was thinking you are both working without tools.”

  “You’re not as funny as you think you are, Bubbles,” he said, his eyes slowly blinking. Again, it was pretty disconcerting.

  “Yeah,” Michelle replied. “I kinda am. Also, I’m not letting Adesina go to this ridiculous thing.”

  “Mom, you can’t stop me, I’m not a child,” Adesina said, looking at her mother intently.

  “Chronologically you are.”

  “You know that’s not how it works, right, Mom?”

  Michelle knew she couldn’t fight Adesina on this point. Adesina’s wild card played with all sorts of things about her phys
ical form, knowledge, and maturity. When she went into a cocoon state, who knew how she’d come out.

  “I think your daughter can make decisions for herself,” Sobek said, a big smile showing his cruddy teeth.

  “You’re not helping,” Michelle replied. “Not helping at all.”

  The Final Court in the temple was crowded with Living Gods and other jokers. There was a distinct lack of nats. Michelle wasn’t bothered by the jokers or the lack of nats. She considered everyone infected by the virus pretty much in the same boat. Sure, aces had it a lot better, but people hated on them pretty much the same way they hated on jokers. That is, if her Twitter feed was any indication.

  Hieroglyphs marched across the walls of the large room, portraits of the Living Gods inserted among them. Isis, Osiris, Anubis, and Sobek were prominent, but the carvings of Ra were double the size of the other gods. He was surrounded by radiating light beams. And the ball over his head was not in the style of the carvings, but in bas-relief and covered in gold leaf.

  The room was crowded enough that Michelle, Bastet, and Adesina were forced to stand. They’d taken up a position on the west wall, leaning against it. Wearing his falcon mask and robes, Drake stood on the opposite side of the room.

  Charles Dutton stood at a clear Lucite podium in front of the audience. A large flat-screen TV was to one side of him. On the screen, linked in from Las Vegas, were Isis and Osiris seated on their thrones. A large contingent of Living Gods had taken jobs at the Luxor years ago, and Isis and Osiris were their spokesmen. Both wore ceremonial garb and neither looked happy.

  “I appreciate your attention,” Dutton said. There was feedback from his mic and he jerked his head back and swayed. He looked frail as he gripped the podium to regain his balance. “I’d like to tell you in more detail what it is that Theodorus Witherspoon is offering you.”

  “We know what Theodorus wants.” Sobek gave a rough hacking cough, then continued. “We’re supposed to pack up everything we own and head to the Moon to colonize it. And we should just trust him for some unknown reason.” He pointed at Dutton, then looked around the room. “We’re in a perilous situation, friends. Remember, we know nothing of Dutton or his master.”

  “I know it sounds daunting.” Dutton sounded as if he was struggling with making himself be heard despite the mic. “You’d be giving up so much, but what do you have to lose? The Caliphate couldn’t touch you there. You wouldn’t be aberrations on the Moon. You’d be the norm. I know what it is to be a joker.” He removed his golden death’s-head mask and a murmur ran through the crowd. Seeing him maskless was almost a letdown. Amber-colored skin was stretched tight against his skull. Long yellow teeth were pulled into a permanent rictus smile. His eyes were bloodshot, the irises a winter-dirt brown. His joker looked the same as his mask.

  “To be clear,” Dutton said, his teeth clacking together. “Despite having many ties to this world, I can no longer live in a place bent on the destruction of my kind.”

  “We aren’t a kind,” Bastet said loudly, startling Michelle. “We belong here on Earth as much as any other human.”

  “But we aren’t human now, are we?” Anubis said, jumping to his feet. His fur bristled. “If we didn’t have Ra, the Caliphate would invade and kill us in a heartbeat.”

  The low whisper of “Aten,” “Aten,” “Aten,” slid through the room. Michelle noted that Anubis and several of the other Living Gods glared at Drake with a hostility Michelle found startling.

  The Living Gods began to argue among themselves while the other jokers mostly sat silently, looking uncomfortable. It was beginning to look like a bad day in the British Parliament. Michelle expected it to turn into a full-blown brawl.

  “I think it sounds pretty cool,” Adesina said to Michelle. She wasn’t slouching against the wall anymore and her wings were slightly open. An eager smile was on her face and her eyes shone. “It would be an adventure! How often do you get to go to another planet?”

  “It’s not a planet. It’s just a satellite,” Michelle snapped. A joker colony on the Moon might be all well and good for the Living Gods, or any other jokers fool enough to follow Dutton and Theodorus, but it wasn’t a place for her daughter. “How are they going to get there?” Michelle asked. “How are they going to get back to Earth?”

  “God, Mom, they must have that figured out.”

  “I’ve yet to see any evidence, except we’re supposed to trust Theodorus—whoever he is.”

  Adesina leaned in close. “It would be awesome,” she said softly, almost conspiratorially. “Go to another planet, satellite, you know, the Moon. Doesn’t that sound like fun? It’s better than running everywhere trying to keep people from killing each other the way you do.”

  Michelle’s jade-green eyes narrowed. “You’re not going to get me to go along with this. And you’re not going to convince me that this is a good choice for you. What about school? What about your friends? Do you think Wally is going to let Ghost go? This is for jokers only. And you would be leaving me.” A queasy feeling slid into Michelle’s gut. This wouldn’t be just one of Adesina’s adventures. This could very well be permanent.

  Adesina turned and started walking away.

  “Where are you going?” Michelle asked with a note of panic in her voice. Suddenly, it felt as if her daughter was walking out of her life, leaving her alone.

  “I’m going to text Ghost. There’s no service in here.”

  Michelle watched as her daughter walked through the room, the arguing jokers parting as she passed by. There was a part of her that wanted to run after Adesina, and another that knew it would be a mistake. “This is all your fault,” Michelle whispered. Bastet’s ear flicked. “If my daughter ends up mixed up in this mishegoss, I’m blaming you.”

  “Brothers! Sisters! Stop!” Osiris’s voice boomed from the speakers placed around the room. Silence fell. “This is not how we behave. We are the Living Gods. We don’t squabble like children.”

  “You’re safe in Las Vegas,” came a voice from the back. Michelle glanced over and saw it was a young joker with ropey violet skin. Behind him she saw Adesina standing in the doorway. She was watching intently.

  “You’re celebrities at a casino,” the lavender-colored joker continued. “You know nothing of the danger here!”

  “Are you saying we don’t have the ability to understand?” Isis asked. Michelle noticed there was a faint line of gray hair at her roots. Isis’s face may have been unlined and still beautiful, but she was beginning to show her age. She had to be at least seventy, maybe eighty. How she and Osiris had kept their youthful appearance made Michelle curious. She wondered if they had an ace power. “We are Living Gods no matter where we reside. And yes, we are a sideshow here. Well-paid and coddled, but nonetheless, we are Other. We have as much invested in this plan of Theodorus’s as any of you.”

  “Do you speak for all the Gods in Las Vegas?” Dutton asked.

  Osiris nodded. “We do,” he said in a grave voice. “We are choosing to stay. There aren’t many of us left here and we don’t wish to leave our home. We respect the wishes of any Living God who wants to leave for this new home in the sky. Those who want to remain on Earth will be welcome here if they don’t wish to stay in Old Egypt. Contact us when you’ve decided what you will do.” The link from the Luxor went dark.

  Dutton turned back to the audience. They stared at him expectantly. “Those are but a handful of Gods,” Dutton began, then coughed. Clearly, he wasn’t well, and Michelle wondered just how old he was. Rumor had it his card had turned back in the ’50s and he hadn’t been young then. “Those of you who live here have committed to embracing who you are without making yourselves objects of pity and derision. On the Moon, you would be safe to continue your lives without constant threat.”

  “We have Ra. We don’t worry about the Caliphate,” Tawaret said in a mellow voice. She lumbered forward, her hippopotamus head held upright by a heavy metal cage resting on her shoulders. “Or do you wish to take hi
m to the Moon and leave us defenseless, Mr. Dutton? We have followers here, jokers who do not look like gods, even some nats. Would Theodorus have us leave them at the mercy of the Caliphate? What is it that your master would have us do?”

  A joker whose body was covered in multicolored scarabs stood so Tawaret could sit. She did so with a groan.

  “There are arrangements we can make for the nats, but only jokers are allowed in the Moon colony,” Dutton replied. He sounded excited, but it was difficult to tell given his rictus face. “Our goal is for all the jokers and Living Gods here to come with us.”

  “If we leave them behind they’ll be slaughtered!” Sobek stood as he spoke, shaking his cigarette at Dutton. Ashes fell to the ground but he ignored them. “This whole ‘worship us’ thing was ridiculous, but we’ve encouraged it. We’ve made them believe in us. It’s immoral to leave them here unprotected and alone. How will Theodorus protect them—and us?”

  “The only way to be truly safe is with Ra here,” Anubis said. His ears flicked forward. “If he leaves … well, this is why we can’t stay even if we wanted to. We’re at the whim of a symbiote and whoever is under that mask.” He gestured at Ra, who stiffened. “There isn’t any point in continuing this conversation until Sekhmet and Ra have made a decision as to whether or not they go.” He snarled, showing his canines. “I don’t need Ra or Sekhmet to decide for me. I’m tired of worrying about when the Caliphate might start another war. I’m tired of our safety being in the hands of this ace. Tell Theodorus I’m ready. Who is with me?”

  Almost two-thirds of the room raised their hands. Half of the Living Gods among them.

  Michelle glanced over to see Adesina’s reaction, but she had vanished through the door.

  Drake stood rigid in the center of his room. His mask and robes lay on the floor. Bastet, in her cat form, was perched on one of the silk pillows atop one of the stone benches. She was watching him intently.

  A bubble stood on the tip of Michelle’s index finger. She was debating what to do with it. Her power was the one constant thing in her life since her parents had left. Except for Adesina. Since saving Adesina from the pit in the People’s Paradise where she’d been tossed to die, she’d been the most important thing in Michelle’s life. But over the last couple of days, Adesina suddenly didn’t feel like a constant at all.