by Sandi Lynn
“Come here, baby.” She hugged me. “I brought you some food.”
“I’m not hungry.” I closed the door. “Can I make you some coffee or tea?”
“No. I will make it for you. Go sit down. I want to make one thing clear to you. You are not quitting the hospital because of him. You don’t give him that kind of power.”
“After everything we’ve been through the past six months, how can he just throw it all away? I was such a fool. I truly thought he loved me. I could feel it. And the way he didn’t even hesitate when the judge asked him if he still wanted the annulment.”
“He’s the one who’s a fool. Not you. You’re going to be okay, Grace.” She set a cup of tea down in front of me.
“I don’t think I will be. Not this time. My heart is so broken, and I don’t think it will ever heal. I have never loved anyone like I loved him. He destroyed me, Renata.”
“Now you listen to me. I’m giving you tough love here. Just like I did when you were my resident. You don’t let any man destroy you. Especially Dr. Jamieson Finn. You are a brilliant surgeon and a kind and compassionate woman. You have so much to offer and he’s the idiot that can’t see it. What he did is a reflection of him, not you. He will be forever working out his mommy and daddy issues. Alone, may I add! You’re going to meet someone special and have a family, and he’ll be sitting in his lonely beach house wishing he’d never let you go.”
“I doubt it. I don’t want to meet anyone else. I really thought we had a future together.” The tears streamed down my face.
“The only future Jamieson Finn has is the lonely path he’s walking. He may not realize it now. It may take ten or twenty years, but he will one day. I could just kill that man!”
Chapter 49
Jamieson
I knew what I did, and I wasn’t proud of it. Not in the least. I got tied up in a six-hour surgery. The OR was the only place where I didn’t have to think about her. I went home and there was silence. I walked upstairs and stared at the empty closet. I needed to do this, and I knew she’d never understand. We got married on a whim, a drunken whim, and that was no way to stay married.
I went downstairs, poured a double scotch, and took it over to the couch. I grabbed my phone from my pocket and sent her a text message.
“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.”
I hit send and waited for it to be delivered. But it never went through. Great. She blocked me. I sighed as I finished off my drink and poured another one. A couple of days had passed, and Renata was giving me the cold shoulder. My pager went off and I was needed for a consult in the ER. I hadn’t seen Grace at the hospital since the day of our court hearing. She sure was doing a good job of avoiding me.
“Did Dr. Harper page me for a consult?” I asked Jackie.
“No. Dr. Harper isn’t here. She took a personal leave of absence.” She gave me a disgusted look. “Dr. Wilson paged you.”
“What do you mean she took a personal leave of absence?”
“It’s really none of your business, Dr. Finn. You are no longer her husband, so you don’t have the right to know anything concerning her. Don’t you have a consult?” Her brow arched.
I narrowed my eye at her and then walked away. After my consult, my schedule was clear for the day, so I went into my research room.
“There you are. I figured I’d find you here. How are you doing?” Logan asked.
“How do you think I’m doing?” I snarled.
“Don’t give me an attitude, man. You’re doing this to yourself. If you want my honest opinion, I think you majorly suck and you’re playing roulette. There’s no guarantee she’ll ever take you back. I’m not sure I would.”
“I didn’t ask for your opinion, did I?”
“Look at you. You’re miserable. Swallow your damn pride and beg her to forgive you.”
“Don’t you have bones you need to set or something?” I asked with an irritated tone.
“Sorry, but I can’t side with you on this. It’s wrong on so many levels. I know you’re used to playing with women’s emotions, but Grace just isn’t any ordinary woman and you know it. She’s the one.” He pointed at me. “And you’ve gone and fucked all that up. I can honestly say, Jamieson, that I don’t even know who you are anymore.” He walked out of the room.
I sighed as I took my hand and knocked all the papers I had off the table.
Grace
I was offered the Head of Trauma position at Boston General. A ten-minute Skype interview and the job was mine.
“You’re running again.” My Aunt Cora narrowed her eye at me as we Facetimed.
“No, I’m not. This is an excellent opportunity for me.”
“You’re running, Grace. You ran from New York because of a man and now you’re running from California for the same reason. Is this what you’re going to keep doing every time a man hurts you? It’s unhealthy and I thought you were stronger than that.”
“I am strong, Aunt Cora, and like I said, this is a step up for me.”
“Bullshit,” she shouted. “If you were still with Jamieson, you wouldn’t be doing this. You’re running!”
“Fine. I’m running! I can’t stay here and work at the same hospital as him. It hurts too damn much.”
“I know it hurts. I was in your shoes before. Many many years ago before your parents died. But you know what I did? I stayed because I was strong, and I had something to prove to myself.”
“And what was that?” I asked.
“That I would not allow one person to dictate and control my entire life. You, my love, can rise up from anything. You can completely recreate yourself. All that matters is that you decide today and you never look back. So what if you’ll see him at the hospital. Yes, it will hurt like hell for a while, but you’ll get over it. You’ll move on and, ultimately, you’ll be glad things worked out the way they did. Face the anger, sweetheart. Don’t run from it.”
We talked for a while more and then she had to go. I took in everything she said and thought that maybe she was right. I loved my job here and I made a lot of new friends. I already left one tribe back in New York and I really didn’t want to leave another one. But having to see him every day and page him for consults was something I didn’t think I would be able to handle.
Jamieson
I tossed and turned all night. I’d roll over and feel the empty space beside me and feel sick to my stomach. Two weeks had passed, and I still hadn’t seen her. Two goddamn weeks and I couldn’t take it anymore. I was more fucked up than I thought I was. I believed this was a good idea so I’d know that I hadn’t just gotten accustomed to her living here because she was forced to. I loved her. I was in love with her and I knew I was from the beginning. But it took this to make me realize that I couldn’t live without her. My world was so dark without her in it. For the first time in my life since my mother left when I was a child, I felt alone. I felt broken in so many ways. I’d always been broken, but then Grace came into my life, and as much as I wanted to blame her for fucking it up, she was the one who made me whole again. She made me feel safe and loved. And what did I do? I destroyed us because I had to put myself to the test. I had to verify that what I felt was real because I’d never felt anything like it before.
“Is Grace back yet?” I asked Jackie.
“Nope,” she spoke in a harsh tone as she stared at her computer.
“Where the hell is she?”
“A personal leave. I already told you that.”
“For how long?”
“I don’t know. I guess whenever she decides to come back.”
“Have you spoken to her?”
“Even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you. You lost that right, Dr. Finn.”
I rolled my eyes and sighed as I walked away. I wanted to leave the hospital and go over to Grace’s apartment and beg her to forgive me, but I got pulled into an emergency craniotomy. I’d go over there tonight, and if she wasn’t home, I’d wait for her until she got back.
> Chapter 50
Grace
It was seven p.m. and I decided instead of ordering take out, I’d run down to the family-owned market a couple of blocks away and pick up something to make for dinner. As I was walking down the aisle looking for a can of diced tomatoes, I ran into Billy, one of the police officers I knew.
“Hey, Grace. How are you?”
“I’m good, Billy. How are you?”
“No complaints. I haven’t seen you at the hospital in a while.”
“I took a personal leave of absence for a bit.”
“Oh. Everything okay?”
“Yeah. Everything is okay. How’s Holly?”
“She’s great. We just celebrated our five-year anniversary last night. Five blissful years.” He grinned.
Suddenly, we heard one of the cashiers up front in a panic. She was yelling, “Please don’t hurt me.”
“Stay here, Grace, and get down,” Billy spoke as he reached for his gun. “All of you get down.”
The only other people in the store besides me and Billy were two cashiers and three other customers in the same aisle as us. I didn’t know what was going on, so I crouched down and slowly made my way to the end of the aisle. There were two guys in ski masks holding up the cashiers. Billy slowly made his way to them, and when one of them turned around and saw him in uniform, he fired his gun and Billy went down. I gasped as I covered my mouth with my hand. My body began to shake, and my heart was pounding out of my chest. I reached in my purse, took out my cellphone, and dialed 911, then placed it in my pocket. I looked over at the other customers, who were down on the floor, scared to death. Another gunshot went off and I noticed it was Billy who shot one of the men. The other guy in the green ski mask yelled and began firing his gun at Billy, shooting him several times in the chest. I was paralyzed with fear, but my doctor instincts kicked in.
“Noah, come on man.” The guy in the green ski mask ran over to him in a panic.
I needed to think of something fast. I slowly stood up with my hands in the air and approached the man as he held his gun to me.
“I’m a doctor,” I nervously spoke. “I can help your friend.”
“What kind of doctor are you?”
“I’m a trauma surgeon.”
“Then get over here and help him. He’s my brother and he can’t die. Do you understand me?!” he shouted.
“Yes. I understand.”
“Don’t try nothing funny, lady, or I’ll put you down.”
I went over to Noah, checked for a pulse, and then lifted his shirt.
“His pulse is weak and he’s losing a lot of blood. We need to get him to the hospital.”
“No! No hospital. You said you’re a doctor and you’ll fix him up right here!” he shouted as he waved his gun at me.
“Okay.” I put my hands up. “But I’m going to need supplies. I need gauze, plastic tubing, a large water jug, and a knife.”
“A knife. What the fuck do you need a knife for?”
“I need to make a chest tube and insert it to drain the blood and fluid from his chest. If I don’t do this quickly, he will die! I need you to place your hand on his wound and apply pressure to try and control the bleeding.”
“No way. I’m not taking my gun off you. You two, go get her what she needs and make it quick! You, in the purple shirt, get over here and apply pressure to my brother’s wound!”
With the supplies they brought me, I made a temporary chest tube, made an incision, and inserted it, letting the fluid drain into the empty water jug.
“Noah, stay with me,” I spoke as I checked his pulse again.
“Hurry up, lady!” the other gunmen spoke. “We need to get the hell out of here.”
“Your brother cannot be moved. He’s not stable!” I yelled.
“Then stabilize him!”
Suddenly, flashing lights and sirens pulled into the parking lot and blocked the entrance to the market. The gunman looked at me with wide eyes as I quickly stood up and my phone fell out of my pocket. He looked down at it and saw that 911 was on the line.
“You bitch!” he yelled as he fired his gun at me, which sent me flying into a metal end cap of canned goods.”
I laid there as I heard more gunshots being fired in the distance. Pain coursed through my body as I trembled. I was in shock and I could feel myself slipping away. Before I knew it, two paramedics were kneeling down next to me.
“Oh my God, it’s Dr. Harper,” I faintly heard one of them say. “Don’t go getting any ideas, Dr. Harper. You stay with us.”
I was put on oxygen as one of the paramedics applied pressure to my wound. They stabilized my neck, but it didn’t stop the pain from radiating through my head.
“My head,” I tried to mumble.
“We’re taking you to the hospital now. You’re going to be okay.”
My life flashed before my eyes like a movie reel and I grew weaker with every second that passed. Everything went black.
Jamieson
I was checking up on a patient when my pager went off. I looked at it and it was from Renata.
“ER. 911 911 911. GRACE.”
A sickness fell upon me as I ran out of my patient’s room and down four flights of stairs to the ER.
“Where is she? What happened?” I asked Renata in a panicked tone.
“The ambulance is five minutes out. Jamieson, I need you to take in a deep breath.”
“Don’t fucking tell me to take in a deep breath. Tell me what happened!” I shouted in anger.
“There was a shooting at a market and Grace was there. She’s been shot, Jamieson.”
I ran outside to wait for the ambulance along with the other doctors that were also waiting. One ambulance pulled up and I ran and opened the door.
“Dr. Grace Harper, gunshot wound to the abdomen and suspected head injury. BP 90/60 and pulse in the 130s. She lost consciousness on the way here and we had to intubate her in the field,” one of the paramedics spoke.
“Grace, can you hear me?” I asked as I leaned over her and rubbed her forehead with my thumb. “Get her into Trauma one!”
I examined her eyes with my light and let out a deep breath when I saw her pupils were reactive.
“Dr. Finn, you need to step away,” Renata spoke.
“How is the wound?” I asked Dr. Windemere, the attending on call.
“Her abdomen is distended. There’s blood in her belly. By the looks of this ultrasound, the bullet is right there in the upper right quadrant. We need to get her to the OR now.”
“She’s stable enough for a head CT,” I spoke. “Let’s get that first and then get her into the OR.”
“Dr. Finn,” Renata spoke abruptly. “I said step away from the patient.”
“The hell I will!” I spoke through gritted teeth. “If she has a brain bleed, which so far everything is pointing to that, I’m operating. I love this woman, Renata. She is my life and I’m not going to stand by and watch. If you have a problem with that, then you can fire me after the fact. Let’s go!” I shouted to Dr. Windemere and the nurses in the room.
We raced her up to the CT room and I impatiently waited for her scans to load.
“Let’s get her to the OR now!” I spoke as I saw the bleeding and pressure build-up in her brain. After scrubbing in, I leaned over her while she lay on the table and kissed her forehead through my mask. “I love you, Grace. Don’t give up on me. Please. Fight with everything you have.”
The pressure build-up in her skull was bad, but I was able to relieve it and stop the bleed in time before any additional damage could occur. Dr. Windemere stopped her internal bleeding, removed the bullet, and Grace was stabilized. We took her up to the CCU, where I wouldn’t leave her side.
“I called her Aunt Cora. She’s taking the next flight out,” Renata spoke. “How is she?” she asked as she walked into the room.
“She’s stable but critical for the next twenty-four hours. I want to speak to the paramedics that brought her in.”
/>
“They’re downstairs,” Renata spoke.
“Then send them up. I’m not leaving her.”
“You wanted to see us, Dr. Finn?” one of the paramedics spoke. “How is Dr. Harper?”
“She’s critical, but I think she’ll be okay. Do you by any chance know what happened and how she hit her head?”
“The officers at the scene said that one gunman was shot by Billy, the officer that was in the store at the time of the robbery. I guess Billy fired his gun after he went down and shot one of the gunmen. It was the guy’s brother. Grace tried to help him. She made a chest tube and inserted it. She also dialed 911 and placed the phone in her pocket. When the cops came, the other gunman shot her. We found her lying against a metal shelf that had collapsed when she hit it.”
“And the gunman who shot her?”
“He’s down in ER. One of the police officers shot him in the leg.”
“Thank you.”
Rage overtook me as I went down and found Jackie.
“Which one shot Grace?” I asked in anger.
“Dr. Finn, don’t.”
I went from room to room, looking for a gunshot victim. He wasn’t hard to find, since the ER wasn’t busy, and John, the cop whom Grace saved, was standing outside his room. I looked at him and he nodded.
“You son of a bitch.” I walked over to the guy and grabbed him by his gown.
“What the hell, man! Ouch. My leg!”
“You shot the woman I love, and for what? A few hundred dollars.”
“She called the cops.”
“And she saved your brother,” I spoke angrily through gritted teeth.
“Whoa, Jamieson,” Logan spoke as he grabbed me and pulled me off the guy. “Stop.”
“Dude, you’re crazy. Get this asshole away from me!” the man spoke.
“I’m going to make sure you rot in prison.” I pointed at him.
“Jamieson, enough,” Logan spoke. “Grace wouldn’t want you to do this.”
