by L M Terry
Shit, I hope she doesn’t need me to give her a ride. The guys are going to be here soon to help me get everything set up. “Oh, do you need a ride?”
“No, I can drive myself. I would cancel but, I feel bad I haven’t been around for Dorothy much lately.”
“Okay, I can give Addy a call if you want so you can get going.”
“Awe, that would be great. You are too good to me,” she says shoving the last of her pancakes into her mouth.
Don’t panic, she doesn’t suspect anything. This is just one little snag in the day. They still have plenty of time for the salon and too get back here in time. “Anything for you, baby.”
I shoot a quick text to Dylan.
A: Hey, can you tell Anna that Dani will meet them at the salon. She is going to visit her friend Dorothy this morning.
D: Yeah, that works great actually. Anna’s going to stay with Sophia and Mannie while I run into the Doc. Noah was up most of the night with an earache. I think its swimmers’ ear, but I want to be sure before we get knee deep in decorating today.
A: Cool, cool. Hope the little guy gets feeling better.
D: It’s your big day, man. You ready?
A: Abso-fucking-lutely.
D: Lol. Love ya man. See ya soon.
Danielle
◆◆◆
Anthony has been in such a good mood lately. He thinks the reign of fucked up things in my life has ended. I know that is an impossibility. That’s not how my life works. Sounds like paranoia, huh? It’s not. Something is wrong with me. My headaches are back. An overwhelming feeling of dread accompanying them. I’ve been so worked up over their return that I’ve physically made myself sick with worry. When we got back to California I called Dr. Lambert. He told me I needed to come in as soon as possible. I’ve been putting it off.
Really I should have known. Things have been going too well. That should have been my first sign things were about to take a turn for the worse. Anthony has been hounding me about setting a date for our wedding, but I just can’t. I’m still thinking that I should walk away. After, today maybe that is what I’ll have to do. I can’t put him through the whole brain tumor thing again. I just can’t.
The nurse opens the door slightly. “Danielle, Dr. Lambert is ready to see you.” God, maybe I shouldn’t have come in, you know the old saying ignorance is bliss. Yeah, not knowing might be better but I can’t keep putting Anthony off on the wedding. I need to know if my tumor is back before I set a date.
“Danielle, how are you doing? I was surprised to see your name on my schedule today,” Dr. Lambert says as he sits down on his little roller chair in front of me.
Okay, so this doesn’t go as planned. A flood of tears decides to make a grand appearance. Great, I haven’t even told him what’s going on yet.
“Hey, Dani. What’s going on?”
“I…I don’t know. My headaches have returned, and I’m so scared the tumor is back. Everything has been going so well, I just know that something is wrong. I’ve been so worried that I’ve made myself sick.” I rush the words afraid if I don’t I will chicken out and run out of the room without answers. Answers that I want and yet don’t.
“Let’s take a deep breath.” He moves to the seat beside me and puts an arm around me. “Headaches can mean many things, Dani. Let’s start by running a few tests then we will work from there. Okay?”
I swipe away my tears with the tissue he hands me and nod in agreement.
“Are you here alone?” he asks.
“Yes, I didn’t want to worry anyone else.”
“Dani, your family loves you. You shouldn’t have come alone. Let me call someone for you.”
“No!” I say entirely too loud. “I mean no, please don’t call anyone. Let’s just see what the tests show. I’m sorry I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
“It’s okay. I understand. I’ll send the lab down and we will get started.”
“Thank you.”
By the time Dr. Lambert comes back with my results and the what’s next, I’ve completely chewed all the polish off my nails. Great Mrs. Chan is going to scold me when she sees me today. He doesn’t sit in his roller chair; he sits next to me. Fuck, this isn’t going to go well. Maybe I should tell him I need to throw up first. Yeah, I think I might throw up.
“Dani, I have some news for you,” he places his hand on my bouncing knee.
“Okay, give it to me straight. Its back isn’t it? Or, is it something else and I’m dying? Just tell me!” My anxiety is maxing out.
He laughs.
What? Why is he fucking laughing? Here I am about to get bad news and he is laughing. Not very professional.
“You are pregnant,” he says.
What?! I had the feeling that today was going to be one of those life changing days. But, this? I was NOT expecting this. “Wait, there is no way.”
“Remember when you and I discussed your birth control? That the medication you have been taking might make it less effective. I suggested you use alternative methods until you were able to stop those medications.”
“Yes, I remember. Anthony and I have been using….oh shit.” My mind flits to the night we took the bike out. We drove farther than we had planned so we stopped at this little hole in the wall motel on the side of the road and…and well we did a little role playing. I played a girl who had just broke up with an asshole and was hitching a ride to somewhere, anywhere. He played the big, bad, sexy as fuck, seductive biker and well you know we didn’t have a condom so….oh. my. God. What did we do?! “That was months ago!” I exclaim.
He laughs…again. “My nurse is checking to see if an obstetrician is available to take a look and see how far along you are.”
“This is bad.”
“Why is this bad?”
“I’ve been sick. I mean with my tumor and all, will that hurt the baby?”
“Absolutely not, Dani. You are healthy and you will have the best of care. I’m sure this comes as a shock, but I promise you the fact you had a tumor will not affect your pregnancy. Okay?”
The nurse bops in interrupting us. “Dr. Mackey can see her today. Just go to waiting room B and they will call you back as soon as they can.”
Dr. Lambert gives me another pep talk before I walk out and head to the waiting room. He said they are going to do an ultrasound. I just found out I’m going to have a baby and I’m going to see him or her…today. I decided many years ago that I would never have children, I was too fucked up to be a mother but, now…now things are different. I have a family, I’m stronger…I have Anthony.
A baby. Anthony’s baby. My hand drops to my stomach and I realize I’m in love. I’m in love with this baby. How did it happen so fast? I guess I fell in love with Anthony just as fast. In a heartbeat of time my love for them was born.
“Dani? What are you doing here?”
I look up at the large figure looming over me. The little boy in his arms stretches his arms out to me. “Da-ee, Da-ee,” Noah coos. I love the way he tries to say my name. I pull him down into my arms and give him a hug, kissing the top of this head.
“What are you two doing here?” I ask.
“Noah had an earache last night. It’s just swimmer’s ear. They gave him a script; we were just heading out.”
“Poor baby,” I whisper over Noah’s fine hair, bouncing him on my knee as he giggles.
“You didn’t answer my question, Dani. Anthony told me you were visiting a friend this morning.” He stares at me, worry settling over his brows.
“I was, I am. I just dropped by to say hi to my doctor.”
“Your doctor’s name is Dorothy?” he says cocking an eyebrow at me.
The nurse bops her head out and calls my name. Great fucking timing lady.
“I’m sorry, I have to go, um, please don’t tell Anthony that you saw me here.”
He runs his hand over his face before taking Noah from me. “You know I can’t do that, Dani.”
“If I tell you what’s go
ing on you have to promise to keep it a secret, just between you and I, at least until I have time to talk to Anthony about it.”
“I promise…IF, you promise to tell Anthony.”
“Well, I’m afraid I’m going to have a hard time hiding it from him. Come on.” I motion for him to follow me. It might be nice to have someone with me for this.
After the nurse shows us to a room and closes the door behind her he starts in with the questions. He jumped to the same conclusion I had, that I’m sick. It doesn’t help that the minute she closed the door I started crying again. What if Anthony doesn’t want a baby? We’ve never talked about kids. We’ve been too busy dealing with bad guys and brain tumors.
“Talk to me, Dani. It will be okay, we will get through this, just talk to me,” he begs. Noah is busy using the step on the patient table as a racetrack for his little cars to notice what is going on behind him.
“I’m…I’m pregnant,” I whisper.
Dylan’s eyes grow huge. “What?” he says jumping up from his seat. I stare in disbelief as he jumps up and down like a little kid. “I’m going to be an uncle!”
I laugh, cry and snot all over the place. “Do you think he will be mad?”
He pulls several tissues out of the box on the desk. “What? No, don’t be ridiculous. He is going to be through the moon with this news!” He sits down beside me and pulls me close to him. “I thought you were sick, Dani. Seeing you here scared the shit out of me.”
“Yeah, well I thought the same thing when I started not feeling well. This is quite the surprise for me too.”
“Danielle Jean,” he scolds. “You should have said something. You don’t have to do this thing called life alone anymore you know.”
“Please don’t tell anyone. Not until I tell him. I’m happy I bumped into you. I’m scared shitless over this whole thing but, he should be the next to know I think.” Laughing I burry my face into Dylan’s broad chest, he has become like a brother to me. I seriously don’t know what I would do without him.
The doctor comes in and Dylan holds my hand while I get the first glimpse of my baby. Sixteen weeks. I’m sixteen weeks along already. The little flutter of a heartbeat calls out to me from the monitor. Dylan runs his hand over my forehead. “It’s the most beautiful thing in the world, isn’t it?”
I nod my head, unable to speak as tears stream down my cheeks.
“Everything looks good. We’ll see you back in four weeks,” the doctor says as the nurse hands me a bag with samples of diapers and formula.
I pull the What to expect when you’re expecting book out of the bag and stare at it. “How did this happen?” I ask Dylan. I don’t think this has sunk in yet.
“Really? Do I need to give you a birds and bees talk?”
“No.” I shove him in the arm. “I mean how did this happen to me? I’m used to bad, ugly things happening not good, beautiful things.”
“There’s going to be bad things, Dani. You just have to learn to keep your head above water until the next good thing happens and it will….it always does. You can’t let the bad things keep you from living.”
“I’m having a baby!” I exclaim.
He laughs. “You better get your pregnant ass a movin. The girls are all waiting on you at the salon, they will be suspicious if you are too much later.”
“Shit, I forgot! Crap, I got to go. See you tonight for dinner? We will have something to celebrate. Anthony is going to be so surprised!”
“Yep, he sure will. It’s a good day for surprises,” he adds as I kiss him on the cheek and rush out the door.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Danielle
◆◆◆
The salon went well I guess. I’ve been in my head, going from excitement to terror. Back and forth. Back and forth. After the salon we head to see Mrs. Chan to get our nails done.
“I’m going to get a blue butterfly this time, oh, and flowers,” Sophia says excitedly next to me. She looks like she is about to burst. Kids, I don’t really understand them. Shit. I’m going to have a kid soon. Sixteen weeks, like how did I not know for sixteen weeks!
“Nails terrible, Dani,” Mrs. Chan scolds bringing my attention back to her. “Quit chewing them. Teeth bad for nail.”
“Yeah, yeah I know.” She doesn’t ask me what I want done today. It doesn’t matter, I’m too busy worrying about the baby growing inside me. A baby. A real baby. Holly shit.
After Mrs. C finishes up my nails I finally look at them. They are a sparkly silver color with one nail on each hand painted in the same sparkles only in a pretty blue color. A little fancy but, I guess, whatever makes her happy.
“You left box upstairs. Go get. New renters move in soon,” she says.
“What? I didn’t leave anything. I moved everything out, I didn’t miss anything,” I tell her, slightly annoyed because I’m anxious to get home and tell Anthony about the baby. I stopped on my way to the salon to pick up the gift I found for him. I’m excited to give it to him. It’s a nice coincidence that the dealer found it for me last week and I was finally able to pick it up today since Anthony wasn’t with me. Hopefully he likes it and well hopefully he likes the news of the baby too.
“You did, Dani. Go get,” she orders with her hands on her hips.
“Fine. I’ll see you girls tonight for dinner,” I tell them as I stomp out.
As I trudge up the stairs I think about the lonely little life I lived here. So, much has changed since then. When I get to the top of the steps I notice something tacked to the door. I pull it off, it’s the contract that I signed with Anthony a year ago today. Has it been that long? Why is it here? My stomach sinks. Is this his way of telling me that it’s over? Has it always been about helping me and now….stop, Dani, he proposed. But, what does it mean?
I push the door open and there he is standing in the middle of the living room, well near the couch…it’s all just one big room. I forgot how small the place is. I close the door quietly behind me, my hands suddenly shaking. “What are you doing here?” I ask fighting the knot in my throat.
“Come here,” he says in his seductive voice.
Oh. Well, you don’t have to tell me twice. Maybe he is here for a little roll playing. Yeah, yeah I know that’s what got us in trouble in the first place. But, hey the good news is we don’t need to use condoms anymore. I hold the contract out to him. “Why was this on the door?”
He takes the contract and tosses it on the floor. “Because, that one expired today. I think it’s a good time to re-negotiate. Don’t you?” He leans in placing tiny kisses all along my jaw.
“Ah, yeah sure, what do you want to negotiate?”
“A wedding date,” he says gazing deep into my eyes attempting to gage my reaction.
“Okay….” We have a baby on the way. I suppose we should set a date. A baby. Anthony and I’s baby. Holy shit.
“How bout, you let me pick the date and if you let me I will be responsible for everything. All the planning will be on me, you won’t have to lift a finger.”
I laugh. “Deal.” I hate shopping and planning. “But, there has to be cake,” I add quickly.
“Good, that’s settled,” he says pulling me over to the table. “Sign here.” He points to a white space on a piece of paper. I glance at it quickly; it’s a marriage license.
“Wait, this is a marriage license. Those are only good for thirty days, Anthony. Surely you’re not planning on pulling a wedding together in thirty days.” Christ a year with this man and I still can’t keep up with him.
“No, you’re right. It takes more than thirty days. That’s why I’ve been planning since the day you said yes.” He taps the blank spot again.
“So, we are getting married in thirty days?” I’m so confused.
“No, we are getting married today,” he states calmly as if we were discussing what time to have dinner.
“Today?!”
“Yep, today. Now, sign, we still have lots to do. Your dress is hanging in the
bathroom. The girls will be up to help you with everything and then I will see you back at the house before the ceremony.” He tugs my hand over the paper. I sign my name in a daze and then he is gone. Just like that, he leaves while I’m still trying to pick my jaw up from the floor.
Did I mention he is a whirlwind?
Sophia runs in first. “Surprise!” she squeals. “I get to be the girl who carries flowers,” she adds. “Look at my dress.”
My hand flies to mouth as I watch the girls all come in with blue dresses. This is why he asked me all of those questions so many month ago. He is the most amazing man I have ever met, and he is mine! I rush to the bathroom and there is my dress. It is perfect. Simple, sleek, and elegant. Perfect for a beach wedding, he remembered everything I said.
Tears. Again, with the tears. “Stop, crying you will ruin your makeup!” Addy says hugging me from behind. “Are you surprised?”
“Yeah.” I sigh. “Yeah, today’s been full of surprises,” I tell her.
Anthony
◆◆◆
That went well. I wasn’t sure how she would react but stunned worked. She didn’t have a chance to argue. Everything is ready. I look down at the beach from the windows, everyone is here mingling below just waiting for me to come down and tell them we are ready to start the ceremony. The girls have just made their way down the path so Dani should be in any second now. I know its bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, but I wanted a few minutes alone. I bombarded her with all of this, so I just want a second of quiet and peace before she becomes my wife.
I hear the door open and close and then the reflection of an angel floats across the glass. I didn’t even know I wanted a wife, until her. Slowly I turn around. I exhale almost choking at the sight before me. Fuck, she is incredible.
She laughs and spins around. Her naked toes peeking out from beneath her dress, toenails painted silver and blue. I bought her pretty little barefoot sandal jewelry since she said she preferred barefoot over shoes. They sparkle in the light, showing off the butterfly in the middle that rests on top of her foot. Fuck she is gorgeous. And mine.
