I had not conquered death. Momma’s jinn spirit had. I leaned toward the cup. I wanted water, not adoration.
Duvsha returned with a steaming aromatic pot. “A healing broth.” She twisted a bit of linen, soaked it, and put it to my lips. I sucked greedily on the honey and lemon compote.
“Who did it?” I rasped after the honey coated my throat enough to speak.
Shani looked to Duvsha for permission.
“Tell her,” said Duvsha.
Shani rubbed her temples, her brow furrowed with a depth of frustration that was echoed in her sorrow-filled eyes.
CHAPTER 30
I sat up straighter, my gaze going from a misty-eyed Shani to a grim-faced Duvsha. I steadied myself for the bad news.
“I failed you,” whispered Shani, and she hung her head.
Duvsha shook her head. “That’s not true.”
Shani paced the room. “The Serdar locked up the chef but I do not think it was him. It would be stupid to poison the queen’s food and wait around the palace to be caught.”
I nodded.
“I did, however, ask him a few questions. The first: Who grinds the flour? His answer: Many different kitchen helpers. Question two: Who comes into the kitchen? His answer: People come and go all day—servants, guards, handmaidens, members of court. Three: Did you leave the kitchen that day? Of course, he had to check deliveries, talk to a new supplier, and rewash the vegetables.” Shani grunted her exasperation. “Your Excellency, there are simply too many ways the poisoner could have added the poison.”
“What about the Old Woman Who Listens?” I asked, my throat feeling like it was coated with sand.
“She said she heard whispers that it was the combined efforts of a cabal made up of the inept ministers you dismissed,” said Shani. “She refuses to say more and will only speak to you.”
“The Serdar needs only your command to arrest and kill them,” said Duvsha.
It was tempting. Who else had reason to murder me? They had lost their exalted positions, were humiliated and disgraced.
“Shall I summon the Serdar?” asked Duvsha.
“No. Summon the Old Woman.”
Duvsha scurried out.
“You don’t believe me.” Shani dropped to her knees after Duvsha left. “I swear on my life—”
“I believe you, Shani.” My hand stroked her soft cheek.
“Then why won’t you order their deaths?”
“I need proof.”
“You are queen. You don’t need proof.”
I picked up the pot of broth from the bedside table and guzzled it down. “To convict based on gossip and without evidence makes me no better than Hasan.”
“He was not blessed by the gods. You are. Have those ministers killed. The people will support you. They love you.” Shani’s tone was all pleading devotion.
“And my love for my people guides my decision to wait for proof.” Tyranny was a sandy slope. One misplaced step and the sand shifts below your foot, causes you to lose your balance and tumble down the steep slope of morality. I must tread carefully. Had I my voice, I would have explained that my people’s love was not carved in stone, but a dry leaf in the wind, easily blown away.
Duvsha accompanied the teary-faced Old Woman Who Listens into the room.
“She thinks you’re going to kill her,” said Duvsha.
“Why do you think that?” I asked the Old Woman.
“I failed you,” she wailed, her gnarled fingers twisting her shawl. “My ears did not hear through the walls. My nose did not smell quick enough.”
“Failed me? Your nose saved my life and your ears heard the rumors.”
The Old Woman Who Listens stopped fidgeting. “But you almost died . . . and I heard whispered rumors, not details.”
“Anyone clever enough to poison me is shrewd enough to keep quiet about it.” My voice grew weaker with each word. I took her bony hand in mine. “Not hearing something not said is not a crime.”
The Old Woman Who Listens closed her eyes, her fear evaporating like dew on a desert flower. “Well, when you put it that way . . .”
After the Old Woman Who Listens left, Duvsha ushered in my next visitor.
“Gula?” It was the herbalist who had sold me the herbs to prevent pregnancy.
“Don’t look so shocked. I’ve been here every day.” Gula put her hand to my forehead. She next felt my pulse.
I swiveled my head to Duvsha.
“It’s true.” Duvsha nodded. “I summoned her after you collapsed.”
“I wish I could say it was my herbal infusions, but I think your healing was the work of the gods,” said Gula.
Or a jinni.
“Your Excellency.” Gula cast quick glances at Duvsha and Shani. “We’ve been talking and we think you need a food taster.”
“No,” I barked. “I will never subject anyone to such a lethal task.”
“We thought you would say that, so Gula came up with a good idea,” said Duvsha.
I crossed my arms. “Well?”
“I test my herbal concoctions on mice, your Excellency, so why can’t we use them to test your food? There’s no shortage of the vermin . . . unless your leopard’s eaten them all.”
Nasreen, who had jumped on the bed the moment I awoke, licked her paw. Her eyes had changed from kitten blue to adult gold. She had grown, too. I would have to tell the kitchen staff to start feeding her bigger pieces of raw meat.
I agreed to the mouse taster.
“One more visitor,” said Duvsha after showing Gula out. “The architect has a special gift for you.” A smile danced across her lips. “Shall I send him in?”
Being seen by your chief cupbearer, bodyguard, and herbalist is one thing. I had no desire to let a member of court see me at my worst. Weak is not a good look for a young queen. “How do I look?”
Duvsha held up the copper mirror.
Oh dear. I looked nothing like a goddess. Matted frizzy hair stuck to my head. My lips were chapped. My dress wrinkled. I needed a bath and makeup and clothing and jewels.
“Take the gift and tell him I’ll be happy to see him after the evening meal, when I expect a full report on his progress and the preliminary plans for the temple.”
Duvsha departed and returned a few minutes later, her entire body hidden behind a gold-colored palm frond. “This is the gift.” Her head peaked around the enormous leaf. “Any guesses?”
I gasped, swung my feet over the bed, and reached out for it like a young child eager for sweets. But this was sweeter than any honeyed treat. “The rukh’s feather!”
“Surveyors found it at the temple site.”
The plume was heavier than it looked, the iridescent barbs stiff and yet smoother than human hair.
“The architect had his men hold it aloft as they carried it through town. It created quite a stir. Even the naysayers are now convinced of your divine rule. Ma’rib buzzes like a hive.”
“It’s true.” Kepha strode into the room. “The people have new hope for their future. Craftsmen work double because of the new trade policies. Even the drunks put down their beer to get a job.”
There was so much to do! I stood, eager to make up for all the lost days. My knees buckled.
Shani caught me in her arms. “You haven’t eaten for a week, your Excellency.”
A week?
“Bring me food,” I said.
I ate. Then ate some more. I wobbled across the chamber several times. I grew stronger every hour. I intended to be fully recovered by evening.
I must prove I was stronger than any poison, stronger than my enemies’ hate, stronger than their treacherous ambition to steal my Great Destiny.
By late afternoon my energy had returned. Mostly.
A long bath washed the stench of sickness from my skin. Duvsha’s recounting of all I missed cleared the remaining fog from my brain.
But only one thing would make me feel completely whole and alive.
I sent everyone away but one. Sha
ni.
CHAPTER 31
I wanted Shani. It was wrong. Most of her life she had been taken advantage of by greedy men and women who mistreated her and objectified her. My desire was not for her as a novelty, but as a friend, as an artist, as a guardian, and I never wished to use her the way so many others had. Nonetheless I convinced myself that a queen’s needs came before anyone else’s. Convinced myself that nothing less than her extraordinary touch would bring about complete healing and restore my energy.
Beautiful ebony-skinned Shani closed and locked my chamber door. She turned about, licked her lips, and stared at the floor.
Though the air was fragrant with fresh flowers to dispel all traces of my illness, we breathed in each other’s scent.
“Shani…” Words escaped me. You’re beautiful, seemed trite. I want you, too imprecise. Fuck me, too demanding.
“What can I do for you, your Excellency?” Shani asked, her eyes focused on the floor.
“What do you want to do for me?” As much as I desired Shani, she had to come to me of her own free will.
Shani lifted her gaze, her large brown eyes heart-wrenchingly tender. “I could never do enough. You’ve given me a new life—allowed me to embrace all of me—all of the parts of my heart.”
“You deserve nothing less.”
Shani set her blade on the table by the door and crossed the room. “I have a confession.” She kneeled down by the bed, her eyes shiny with adoration. “I will understand if you send me away.”
My heart sank. I had misunderstood her lingering gazes and shy smiles. How stupid of me. “I cannot imagine what you have to confess that would cause me to do such a thing.”
Shani took a deep breath. “It’s wrong, I know, but I can’t help it. I can’t stop the feeling. I should leave Ma’rib but I can’t. I can’t.” Her eyes met mine. “I love you, your Excellency.”
I did not love Shani. I cared for her. I lusted for her, craved her. I wanted to explore her sensual gifts and bask in her sexual power.
“I have a confession as well. I hope you won’t think the worse of me for it.” I set my small hand on her large one. “I am not capable of that kind of love. But I do love fucking. My soul and body demand it. I cannot give my heart to you but I can give you my body.”
Shani reached out and touched my cheek. “That is more than I hoped for.”
My fingers closed around hers and gave a quick tug.
Shani grinned, her bright white smile infectious, and settled on the bed next to me. “When you’re feeling better—”
I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her close. “Fucking cures everything.”
There was nothing shy about our first kiss. Nothing halting or tentative. We sighed into each other, two lovers finally enjoying a mutual but inappropriate desire. I should not bed my bodyguard. Shani ought not be in love with her queen.
Lust, however, broke rules. Desire scoffed at gender, age, and status.
I was a queen, yet I would kneel before her and feast on her cock and cunt. I was a queen, yet I would beg her to shove her cock into my mouth, my pussy, my anus. I was queen, yet I would serve her desires, too.
In so many ways, Shani was greater than I. Her sexuality superior to mine, her body perfect for carnal pleasures. Shani was erotic perfection. I bowed to her seductive altar.
Our tongues thrust deeply, curling around each other as we removed our garments, eager for flesh upon flesh. Breasts and nipples pressed together.
I pulled out the leather cord tied at the end of her braid and finger combed through her thick fuzzy mane, which was coarser than mine. Her hair wafted over her glossy shoulders like a dark mist and floated weightless to her waist.
“What a pity you must wear a braid,” I said.
“The Serdar says I must cut my hair if I want to be a true soldier. He says my braid is a disadvantage. Something for an enemy to grab.”
I wound her spun obsidian in my fist and tugged her lips to mine. “Never cut your dark mane. It is your crown.”
Shani was aggressive in her kisses, rough, mouth wide and devouring, stealing my breath. Her hands, despite their large size and shape, stroked me tenderly. Her fingertips fluttered over my cheeks and down my neck. I threw my head back to revel in the touch of her tongue.
My hand brushed across her firm breasts, her dark-brown nipples stiffening under my touch. My other hand closed around her rigid cock. She moaned into my throat as my fist pumped and my fingers pinched.
“Three erections, by the gods, my cunt is already dripping.” I latched on to her taut brown nipple and suckled. How can I explain the pleasure of enjoying both her cock and her tits? My clit was engorged, throbbing and slick. “Oh, to have two mouths and four hands.” I pushed her back and devoured her cock, one hand moving across her breasts, the other fluttering over her tight balls.
Shani’s hips rose and lowered, her body tensing and relaxing, her quiet moans extending. “Let me fuck you,” she whimpered.
I let her cock slip from my mouth. “Let me worship you first.”
“Worship me?”
I ran my tongue up the length of her cock. “You are perfect and whole. Imagine a world where everyone was like you. There would be no women’s jobs and men’s work. Character, skill, and talent would determine our occupation. Many of our problems would disappear.” I wiggled my finger into her tight snatch. “I am a queen. But you are a gift from the gods. A way to show the world what could be . . . if only our minds were not so small and petty and afraid of the unknown.”
Shani shuddered, tears trailing down her cheeks. “Your Excellency—”
My lips covered her cock while my fingers thrust into her wet slit.
Shani cried out, her legs jerking, her salty cum filling my mouth. I lifted my head and grinned, then scampered over her body like a spider and plunged my tongue into her eager mouth.
Released from her overwhelming urges, Shani lingered at my lips, her fingers strolling across my skin with an exquisite slowness that left my body enthralled and aflame.
Our legs tangled together like a climbing vine, and her cock thickened against my thigh. Her limbs were soft and strong, the two sensations a sensual thrill that left me panting.
“My turn,” Shani whispered, lowering her head to my breasts, her hand snugging between my thighs.
She found me slick with lust. I rolled on my back and spread my legs but Shani would not be deterred in her leisurely journey over my body. I writhed and moaned, pushed her head down. She chuckled and caressed my puckered hole with such tenderness that my gooseflesh ass tingled.
“I want all of you, Bilqīs,” she murmured, dragging her nail across my inner thigh.
“Be greedy.” My hips angled for her. My hand moved between her cunt and cock while my lips lapped at her luscious breasts.
Shani thrust into me, slanting her slow withdrawal against my clit. I groaned at her expertise, her measured plunges into my heat. Each one lifted me higher. I grabbed a handful of her succulent, rounded ass.
“Smack it,” she whispered into my neck. “Make it sting.”
I did. Hard.
She whimpered and shivered. “Again.”
I slapped, her bottom jiggling, my cunt constricting around her cock. Her cock and tits and bouncy ass flew me to paradise. My cries were uttered in quick short spurts that matched my panting. I spanked her hard with my open hand, faster and faster until my body shook and spasmed. And that’s when she rolled me on my stomach, hoisted my ass in the air, and shoved her cock into my puckered hole.
I tumbled into the rapture, cunt and anus swept into an undulating orgasm.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself. I wanted all of you.” Shani pulled out and massaged her cum into my ass, blew cool breath across me until I begged for more.
“My queen, you’re as greedy as I.” She lay down under my dripping twat, wrapped her lips around my cunt, stuck her finger into my ass, and fucked me until I squirted my bliss on her face, until
my legs gave out and I fell forward.
“I love you, Bilqīs,” she whispered.
“I love how you fuck, Shani.”
“I’m completely spent.” Shani yawned.
I pinched her nipple. I was not tired. I was rejuvenated, energy coursing though my limbs. I could have run to the temple and back.
I sprang from the bed, and brushed and braided my hair while Shani softly snored. I put on a pristine white dress and the ruby necklace, and wrapped a belt of liquid silver tight around my waist. After tying on sparkly silver-beaded sandals, I opened the door and stepped into the vestibule.
Duvsha blinked, her eyes red and tear-filled.
She’d heard. Of course she’d heard. Shani and I had rutted like animals.
My heart constricted over the pain I’d caused her. “You heard us. It must have been difficult for you.”
Duvsha sniffed and looked away.
“Our bond of friendship is not diminished.” I took her hand. “It is strengthened.”
Her head snapped back around, her eyes narrowing.
“I can no more change my nature than Shani can hers.” I pulled her out of the shadowed vestibule and into the twilit garden. “My mother could fly around the world in a heartbeat. She had the strength of twenty men. I did not receive those traits. I inherited cruder qualities. Sex strengthens me. One person—man or woman—will never be enough. It’s best you understand that now.”
Duvsha looked like she had swallowed a bitter herb, her lips puckered and tight. “I never thought it would just be us.”
“You are my dearest friend. And friendship endures where lust cannot. Anyway, without you, I would still be wandering around Ma’rib looking for the palace.”
Duvsha’s mouth twisted upward into a spontaneous smile. “Oh, you would have found it eventually.”
I squeezed her hand. “Now, my dearest chief cupbearer, gather a small contingent of soldiers and a priest, and pack clothes for an overnight visit.” I snapped my fingers. “And bring the chef.”
“Where are we going?”
“I have a sacred duty to fulfill.”
CHAPTER 32
Confessions of a Sheba Queen Page 15
