by R. R. Banks
“I understand,” I say. “I get it.”
She steps forward and wraps her arms around me, pulling me into a tight embrace. It's the first real physical contact we've had since she gave me the hand job at the diner, and it feels nice. There's something comforting about having her warm body against mine. Something that soothes and eases my mind, body, and soul. It's a completely unexpected feeling and reaction, but it's nice all the same.
She turns her face up to mine, and I lean down, pressing my lips to hers. Our kiss is slow, and sweet, our tongues dancing around each other in her mouth, and yet it's filled with unspoken emotion. It's filled with passion, desire – and something more. Something I can't put my finger on. But, it brings me no small amount of comfort and joy, all the same.
When I pull back, there's a small smile on her lips that I'm sure matches the one on mine. We stand there in each other's arms, staring into each other's eyes, and I have the absurd notion that I never want the moment to end.
The moment ends right when Olivia bursts through the doors, her phone in hand, and a wide smile on her face. Bailey and I step back from each other, both of us clearing our throats at the same time, pretending nothing was going on between us. Which is stupid – two grown adults acting like a couple of teenagers who just got caught making out in the basement.
Olivia, obviously realizing she walked in on something, looks away, an embarrassed expression on her face.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to –”
“No, it's fine,” Bailey says. “We were just – talking.”
Talking. Like anybody with half a brain would believe that. I almost want to laugh at how ridiculous the lie is, but I manage to hold myself in check.
“What's up?” Bailey asks.
“We just got a call about Father Gus,” she says. “He's going to be okay.”
The relief washing through Bailey is palpable, even from where I'm standing. It's like all of the tension in her body suddenly rushed out at once, leaving her limp and boneless. I'm half-afraid her legs are going to give out and she's going to fall right on her butt. She manages to hold it together though and remains upright. Soft tears roll down her cheeks, and the smile on her face makes my heart melt.
“That's good news,” she says. “Really, really good news.”
Olivia nods. “It's a blessing,” she says. “I just thought you’d want to know.”
“Yes, absolutely,” Bailey says. “Thank you, Olivia.”
“Of course,” she says. “I'll leave you two to finish your – conversation.”
I can hear her laughing through the door as she leaves, and all I can do is shake my head. Bailey turns to me with a look of pure, unadulterated joy on her face. It's a look that makes me smile. And I realize, I always want her to be this happy.
Always.
Bailey
It's been a long, long day filled with the highest of highs, and the lowest of lows – and everything in between. We're sitting in the back of Colin's car, and I stretch out my legs. My feet are killing me. Colin looks at me, and even though his face is cloaked in shadow, I can still see the enigmatic smile he's wearing.
“What is it?” I ask.
He shrugs. “Nothing.”
He grabs hold of my legs and puts them in his lap. I watch as he slips off my shoes and starts to rub my feet for me. My eyes practically roll into the back of my head as he rubs my stiff, sore feet. I melt into the seat and feel like I could drift off to sleep right here and now.
“You know,” I say. “If the whole exploiting the world thing doesn't work out for you, I think you could have a real career in foot massage ahead of you.”
“Foot masseuse doesn't quite have the same appeal as exploiting the world around me,” he says. “There's no power trip to be had when you're rubbing people's feet.”
“No, probably not.”
“Definitely not,” he says.
Between the gentle sway of the car and Colin's foot massage, I'm being lulled into a near catatonic state. And all the while, Colin is looking straight at me, his eyes glittering like chips of ice in the darkness.
I still can't get over the shock of him offering Matthew a job. It's one of the most generous things I've ever seen a person do for a total stranger. Not only is Colin giving Matthew a job, and a chance to build his dignity back up, he's giving him a sense of hope. A sense of purpose. And that's something you can't put a price tag on.
Seeing the unfettered joy in Matthew's face is something that will stick with me forever. It's a memory I'll cherish and treasure for the rest of my life. In a lot of ways, I feel like the people who come into the shelter are my children. I doubt I'm ever going to have any of my own, so I've taken on an almost motherly role with the people I care for. I love them. I want to see all of them succeed.
And, I'm fiercely protective of them. Which is why I went off on Colin like I did – something I feel terrible about, after finding out his offer was genuine and sincere.
“You know I don't actually think the worst of you, don't you?” I ask.
He shrugs again. “Kind of seems like that sometimes.”
“I'm sorry, Colin,” I say. “I'm just very protective of them.”
“And I get that,” he replies. “That's one of the reasons I'm not upset. Actually, I think it's sweet. Endearing.”
A faint smile touches my lips, and I let out a soft moan of pleasure as he works one of the sorest spots on my feet.
“I was watching you with them tonight,” he says. “The people in the shelter. You're really good with them. They all seem to love you. I can tell you’ve made a real difference in their lives.”
“They deserve to know somebody cares about them,” I say. “They deserve somebody who will fight for them.”
“And that you do,” he says with a soft chuckle. “In spades. It's one of the many things I respect and admire about you, Bailey. You fight for what you think is right.”
I reach down and take his hand in mine, giving it a squeeze. “Thank you,” I say. “That means a lot.”
We ride in silence a few minutes, and I continue to watch him from the shadowy back seat. He seems content, just absent-mindedly rubbing my feet. Seems content – maybe even happy – to just be with me. And as I turn it all over in my mind, I know that I feel the same way about him.
“You're a good man, Colin Anderson,” I say.
“And here I thought I was a greedy corporate pig,” he replies with a grin.
“Those things are not mutually exclusive, you know.”
He laughs as the car pulls to a stop in front of my building. I see flashing yellow lights strobing throughout the interior of the car and sit up quickly. I see work crews surrounding my building and notice that the doorway has been taped off. As I stare at the scene outside, I feel nausea and anxiety rising in my stomach.
“God, what now?” I groan.
“Let's find out,” Colin says.
The driver opens the door, and we slide out – stepping into at least an inch of water. Actually, it's more like a raging river that flows past our feet, down the steps of my building, and out into the street. I look over at a man in a hard hat standing there, looking up at the building.
“What is going on here?” I ask.
“You live here?” he turns to me and asks.
“Yeah, I do,” I reply.
“Bad news,” he says. “Water pipes on the top floor burst. Everything's wasted.”
“What?”
My heart falls into my stomach, and I feel like I'm going to be sick. I live one floor from the top, meaning that if the pipes on the floor above me burst, my place is completely flooded. Actually, judging by the amount of water flowing out of the building, I'd say it's a safe bet the whole building is flooded out.
“I need to get into my place,” I say. “I need to see if anything can be salvaged.”
The man shakes his head. “Can't let you in, lady,” he says. “It’s too dangerous. What floor do you live on?”
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“The seventh.”
His face is pinched, and gets the expression of a man who really doesn't want to deliver bad news. He looks over at Colin, and then back to me.
“If you're on the seventh floor, it's safe to say you're not gonna be able to salvage anything,” he says. “The whole place is wasted, lady. Sorry.”
It's a good thing Colin is standing beside me, otherwise I might have thrown myself into the river at my feet and let myself be swept away. He holds me as I burst into tears. It's as if all the emotion of the day is suddenly hitting me all at once. My body heaves as I'm racked with sobs, and salty, thick tears roll down my face.
“It's my home,” I say. “All of my things.”
Colin pulls me to him and wraps his strong arms around me. He holds me tight and strokes my hair, doing his best to soothe me.
“It's okay,” he whispers softly into my ear.
“No, it's not,” I wail. “It's really not.”
I let him lead me back to the car and slide me inside. He closes the door himself, and then gets in on the other side. He scoots close to me, and puts his arm around my shoulders, pulling me tight against him. I bury my face in his chest and keep sobbing.
We spend the entire ride to his place like that, and it's only when he's helping me out of the car that my tears seem to dry up. I barely even look at his house as he leads me inside. I feel completely numb right now.
“What are we doing here?” I ask.
“You're going to stay here,” he says. “You need a place to rest.”
“I can go to a hotel, Colin.”
“No,” he says. “I have more than enough room. You'll stay here, and we can figure out what to do in the morning.”
I nod, only because I don't have the strength or energy to argue. Everything I own – which admittedly, isn't much – was in my place. And now, it's totally gone. All of it. I know it's just stuff. But, it's mine. I bought it myself. And when you grow up without anything to call your own, you cherish your belongings more than the average person.
Colin leads me into the kitchen and sits me on a stool at the large granite island. I glance around, noticing that there's a lot of brick in the place, and of course, all of the modern, state of the art gadgets a person could want.
He reaches into a cupboard, grabs a couple of glasses, and a bottle of something alcoholic. I don't really care enough to look at the label right now. All I know is that it's an amber-colored liquid that will help keep me numb – which, for now, is all I want. To shut down my emotions and feel absolutely nothing.
He pours a couple of fingers into each glass and slides one over to me. I reach out, grab the glass, and down it in one fell swoop. I grimace as the liquid fire slides down my throat. It hits my belly like an atomic bomb and starts spreading warmth throughout my body. Without a word, Colin pours me another, and I repeat the process. Only this time, it goes down with much, much less pain.
It feels like my body is glowing from the inside now, and although I'm numb, I'm starting to feel somewhat more human again. Colin sips on his drink in silence, just staring at me over the rim of his glass. There is an overwhelming amount of compassion and concern in his eyes, and it sends a warmth shooting through me that has nothing to do with alcohol.
“I'll be okay,” I say. “I just need to get over the initial shock of it all. It's been a long, emotional day.”
He nods. “I'm sure you must be exhausted.”
I give him a weak, fragile smile. “I really am.”
“There's a spare bedroom you can have,” he says. “It's quiet, near the back of the house, and has its own bathroom. You'll have total privacy.”
“Thank you, Colin,” I say. “For everything. I don't even know –”
“You don't need to thank me for anything, Bailey,” he says and then grins. “Besides, it might be nice to have some company in this big ol' place for a change. Come on, I'll show you the way.”
I follow him through the house, really seeing it for the first time. The place is enormous – practically a palace. The floors are done in a dark-colored hardwood, and the interior design is soft, earthy, and muted. The architecture is unlike anything I've ever seen. I don't even know what to call it. Honestly, it reminds me of a castle.
We pass all the packages we picked up today. The driver has them all stacked up in the foyer, lined up and waiting for me. I don't even want to think about it right now. All I want is a hot shower and some quality time in a comfy bed.
Colin leads me up a spiral staircase, and down a long hallway decorated in the same earth tones and dark paneling. The further we go into the house, the more it reminds me of a castle. The art on the walls is classic – all of the old masters are well-represented, of course. And for good reason – they're not called the masters for nothing. I see many prints, obviously, but there are a few that could be original works, something which is mind-boggling to me. The price of an original is more than I make in a year. Hell, it’s probably more than I'll make in my freaking lifetime.
The hallway ends at a rounded doorway which Colin holds open for me. I step through and into a room larger than my entire apartment. The room is dominated by a large, four-poster canopy bed. The bedding is a rich shade of crimson and looks heavenly soft from where I'm standing. There's a large armoire against one wall, a highboy dresser against another, and a luxurious walk-in closet that also might be larger than my apartment. A pristine daybed sits beneath a large, oversized window that overlooks what has to be at least an acre of land behind the house.
Wow. Must be nice to be rich as sin.
Colin disappears and lets me walk around the place, getting a feel for it. He comes back a few minutes later with a t-shirt, a pair of sweatpants, and some basketball shorts.
“I wasn't sure what you'd be comfortable in,” he says. “I guess we should have gotten you some casual wear today too, huh?”
A regretful chuckle passes my lips. “If only we knew, huh?”
He takes my hands in his and gives them a reassuring squeeze. “It's going to be okay, Bailey,” he says. “I promise you it will. You can stay here as long as you need to. I'm down the hall, but you'll pretty much have this side of the house to yourself. So, however long it takes to get your apartment squared away, is fine with me. You’ll always have a roof over your head here.”
As I look at him, I honestly don’t know how I got so lucky, or what I did to deserve such good fortune. My eyes sting with tears I'm trying my best to bite back but failing at miserably. Colin's generosity humbles me, and I am profoundly grateful to him. It's a debt I don't think I'll ever be able to repay.
I lean against him and revel in feeling his powerful arms wrapped around me. Delight in the warmth and closeness of his embrace. Having him pressed against me makes me feel safe in ways I've never experienced before. I turn my face up to him and find a gentle smile on his lips as he looks down at me.
I put my hand behind his neck and pull him down to me, hungrily pressing my mouth to his. I part my lips, and let his tongue fill my mouth. Our kiss is sensual. Passionate. And exactly what I need right now. I feel so unhinged and untethered at the moment, that I need this human contact. Need this affirmation of life.
Colin leans into me, letting his hands roam my body as our kiss intensifies. He cups my breasts, rubbing my hard nipples through the fabric with his thumbs, drawing a soft moan from me. He slips the cardigan off my shoulders, and lets it fall to the ground at my feet. He presses his soft lips to my neck, planting a line of tender kisses down to my collarbone.
I reach around to my back and slide the zipper of my dress down. I let the straps slip off my shoulders, and it joins my cardigan in a pool of fabric at my feet. I stand naked before him and watch his eyes explore my body for the first time. He draws in a breath as he drinks me in from head to toe, his expression rapt, desire burning bright behind his eyes.
The way he looks at me makes me feel like the sexiest woman on the planet. Colin looks at me like I'm a
goddess, and as those intense gray-blue eyes soak in every inch of me, I feel myself becoming more and more turned on.
“Are you sure you want to do this right now?” he asks.
I nod. “Very sure.”
I need to feel something. I need to feel him. I'm teetering right on the edge of a nervous breakdown, and I feel like he's the only one who can pull me back and return me to reality. I step forward and reach for his belt. He stops me though, taking my hands in his. I cock my head and look at him, and he flashes me that enigmatic, roguish smile of his.
He leads me over to the bed, sitting me on the edge of it. Suddenly, Colin darts out of the room, and I hear his feet padding down the hall. I lay back on the bed and close my eyes, letting the sensations wash over me. My body is glowing with an inner light, and I feel a warmth burning bright between my thighs. I reach down and idly stroke my clit, teasing myself until he gets back.
I circle it with my fingers, making my body hum with a carnal electricity. I'm smoldering with desire, anxiously anticipating the feel of Colin's thick, hard cock deep inside of me for the second time. I bite my bottom lip and stifle a cry as I slip two fingers into me, pressing down on my clit with my thumb.
As I pleasure myself, I suddenly realize I'm not alone. My eyes pop open and I sit up to find Colin standing there, his cock already encased in the condom, his eyes lit with pure lust and desire.
“Sorry,” I say. “I was getting tired of waiting.”
“Don't let me stop you,” he says.
“But I want the real thing.”
“Your wish is my command.”
I scoot up on the bed and he falls down on top of me, holding himself up on his arms. He looks down at me, presses his lips to mine, and gives me a kiss that's surprisingly affectionate. Sweet, even. I spread my legs for him, giving him access to me.
Colin positions the head of his cock, pressing it against my opening, and as he passionately kisses me again, he parts my lips with his cock. He slips between the velvety folds of my pussy with a surprising gentleness and ease. He slides himself all the way in until he's fully sheathed inside of me and holds himself there.
