by S. White
“Very well.”
“I must tell that I was surprised to find you here when I arrived. Simon asked me to wed him, you see, and invited me to spend the Holiday's with his family.”
“Simon told me your engagement is broken. He hinted at some unpleasantness.”
“Oh, dear. We had a little tiff before he left London.” Clarissa let a tear fall from her eyes.
“Do you call being found in the arms of another man a little tiff, Clarissa?”
Clarissa's cheeks drained of color. “He told you that? No, don't tell me. I can see he did.” She took a deep breath. “T-The truth i-is I am carrying his child. So you see we have to wed. You are a complication.”
Kathleen gasped. “I see. If you will excuse me.”
She rose and left the room before the gentlemen joined them.
Simon was the first to enter the drawing-room followed by the other gentlemen. His eyes searched the room for Kathleen but didn't find her.
“Where is Kathleen?”
“The poor dear had a headache and retired,” Clarissa said. “Please, join me.”
The Dowager's eyes narrowed but said nothing.
“On second thought, I have a great deal of estate work to do before I retire.”
“Oh, but it is so late,” Caroline piped up. “I was just going to try the pianoforte to liven up the evening.”
Simon smiled at his eldest sister. “In that case, I will turn the music for you.”
Simon walked over to the pianoforte when Caroline took a seat. Two songs was all anyone could take before, one by one, the family disappeared from the drawing-room. Simon and Caroline were the only ones left. Even her husband had deserted.
Simon left after the last song sung badly off key. He was tired of fighting, but he would continue to fight for Kathleen until his dying breath.
Maybe I should check to see of my Kathleen is all right. But if she is asleep I wouldn’t want to wake her.
❄Chapter Twenty-one ❄
Kathleen had a difficult time falling asleep. Her mind kept playing her conversation with Clarissa. Could it be true? Is she carrying Simon's child?
If so, why is he refusing to wed her? He seemed to be an honorable man. Where did that leave her in all of this? No, she refuse to believe Clarissa is enceinte. She was always a liar and still is.
I am in love with Simon. Can a resume my life as a governess after this sojourn with a real family? Can I hope that Simon loves me too?
She lit a lamp and went to sit on the window seat for a while. The full moon peeked through the clouds. Kate could see some stars as the clouds moved away. It seemed to be snowing less. If the weather clears by tomorrow then Simon will send Clarissa back to London.
Kathleen grabbed her robe before putting on her boots. She had to be outside in the snow for just a few minutes.
She made her way downstairs. Everything was quiet. Kate supposed everyone was snug in their beds. She entered the quiet drawing-room. The only light was from the moonlight shining in the room through the windows and the French doors.
Kate walked towards the double doors and opened them. They wouldn't open completely. Just wide enough for her to squeeze through. It had stopped snowing but a snowdrift was piled against the doors.
Simon will have people outside clearing the snow from the doors tomorrow. Maybe I should ask him to take me to the Posting Inn. Can I give him up that easily? No, absolutely not!
She looked up at the full moon. Its light made the snow glisten like magical jewels. Kate took a breath of the frosty air and shivered. Still, she couldn't bear to return to the house just yet. She moved further from the house. Her feet crunched through the snow. She shivered again.
Kate decided it was time to return to the house so she returned to the drawing-room's french doors and found them shut and locked. She told herself not to panic just yet. Kate trudged through the snow to the front door. It was also locked.
She knew if she stayed out much longer she would freeze to death.
What am I to do? Where can I go? The stables?
Once her decision was made, Kate trudge through the snow again towards the stables.
❄
Simon rubbed his eyes. He had been going over the estate books for what seemed like hours. He glanced up at the mantel clock. It was almost one in the morning. He had been at it for a few hours.
He rose from his chair and stretched his cramped body before strolling towards the door.
It is past time for me to be in bed. Maybe tomorrow will bring me closer to marrying my Kathleen.
Simon didn't have much hope of that, but he could always pray for a miracle. He slowly climbed the steps to his room.
Once inside, he looked around the large room. Something didn't feel right. The master suite didn't look any different than when his father was alive. When his father died suddenly, he mother insisted he move into the master suite and she moved to another room leaving the Countess's suite empty.
Up until now, he had been reluctant to make changes.
Maybe I should have this room redone after the first of the year. It looks too dark. Maybe Kathleen will—
A noise drew his attention to the bed. He couldn't believe what he saw. Clarissa Barrington laid in his bed. She propped herself up on her elbow letting the quilt fall exposing her ample breasts. Clarissa's naked body didn't even arouse him.
“What are you doing in my bedchamber?”
Clarissa smiled seductively. “Darling, if you wouldn't come to me I thought I would come to you. You know you want me.”
It was hard for Simon to control his anger. He took a step closer. “Get out of my room! Now!”
“Oh, darling, you don’t really mean that? Do you really want me to leave this cozy bed made for you and me.?”
“I said get your clothes and get out.” Simon was shaking with his anger.
“Make me, darling.”
Clarissa was treating this whole thing like a game. For Simon, this wasn't any game. It was his life—his future.
Before, he loathed this woman; now he hated her. Simon stepped closer to the bed and grabbed her arm. He yanked her body out of bed dragging her towards the door.
Clarissa resisted, but she wasn't strong enough to stop a crazy man. Simon flung open the door and tossed a totally naked Clarissa into the hallway. He slammed the door and locked it. She screamed and pounded on his door. Clarissa would probably wake the whole house with her caterwauling.
Simon tried to be nice to the woman. He had explained everything to her but nothing got through. Her body in his bed was the last straw.
Once his mind cleared, Simon realized the woman's clothing was scattered about the floor. He gathered up her clothes and marched to the door.
Simon fumbled with the lock and flung open the door again. Clarissa took a step back. He tossed her clothes at her.
“I want you out of my house this morning. I am going to marry Kathleen. Is that in anyway unclear?”
Simon rolled eyes as Clarissa began to cry.
“But Simon, I love you. I n-need y-you?”
“Really, my dear, fake tears? Your tears do not move me and neither does your … ah, person.” He slammed the door again and locked the door.
Clarissa's pounding on his bedroom door was enough to wake the whole household. A few doors squeaked open but nothing else. He was thankful that members of his family didn't interfere with his decision in this situation. His ex-betrothed had crossed the line.
“Simon, darling, don't do this to me. I love you.”
Simon heard her hiccup, but her pleas didn't move him. He wasn't going to let her ruin what he hoped was his wedding to Kathleen.
He just had to woo his Kate or at least convince her that he would make her an excellent husband.
I can’t expect her to love me yet, but maybe with time—
Clarissa stopped pounding the door. Was she still in the hall waiting to pounce.
❄Chapter Twenty-two ❄
&
nbsp; Simon's heart felt like it was about to pound out his chest. Clarissa had given him the perfect reason for not marrying her. He didn't feel attracted to her. He did feel like a cad treating Clarissa like he did, but she drove him to it.
“Good Lord. What if Kathleen was awakened by the racket in the hall and opened her door to see Clarissa in her all-together? What would she think?” The worst, of course, and he wouldn't blame her.
Simon panicked. He found an urgent need to find Kathleen.
She is probably sleeping. I don't care. I just need to see her.
He opened his door an inch and peeked out into the hall. All was quiet. Clarissa had evidently returned to her room. Maybe if she left quietly later this morning?
I don't want to think about that woman anymore. Kathleen is the one who should be filling my every thought.
Simon left his room and quietly stepped to the door of the Countess's Suite. He knocked and then waited for an answer.
After knocking again, he tried the door. It was unlocked. Simon knew he shouldn't enter but at this point he didn't care.
He tiptoe through the sitting room to the bedroom and knocked. Still no answer, so he slowly turned the knob. Simon pushed the door open.
A lit candle sat on the bedside table. He glanced at the bed. The covers were pushed back but the bed was empty.
Where was Kathleen? Did she hear the commotion in the hall and fled in fright?
Oh, God. I have to find her.
❄
Simon search all the downstairs public rooms, the Main Salon, the library, his study, although he couldn't understand why she would be in his study and she wasn't. He next tried the music room. Kathleen was nowhere to be found.
He sat down on the bench at the pianoforte and raised the lid. Simon pounded out his frustration on the keys. He could play but was nowhere near as good as his Kathleen.
Another thought occurred to him. Maybe she was hungry and went down to the kitchen for a snack.
Simon jumped up and made for the nearest stairs that would lead him to the kitchen.
He was disappointed when he found the kitchen empty.
Where is my Kathleen? She has to be somewhere. She couldn’t have disappeared.
Simon searched the pantry and found some treat his cook had made for their Christmas Eve celebration. Some celebration that will be if he couldn't find Kathleen. He took a few of the treats with him back to the kitchen along with a pitcher of milk. Simon poured a glass of milk and plopped himself onto a stool.
He munched on the treats and sipped the milk. Simon didn't finish his treat nor his milk but he did wrap the treats in a napkin and stuff them into his pocket.
There was one room Simon hadn't searched—the drawing-room. He took the stairs two at a time making way to the drawing-room.
Simon opened the doors expecting to find Kathleen asleep on a sofa. The room was empty.
Where is my Kathleen?
He noticed the French door's drapes were open.
That was why it was so cold in here. Kathleen couldn't be outside, could she? Oh God, please no.
Simon walked to the French doors to close the drapes. He looked up at the clear sky. A million stars twinkled at him. The moon was so bright he could see almost as far as the stables.
Something caught his eye. Footprints in the snow. They looked fresh.
Could it be? There is only one way for me to find out.
Simon raced for the foyer and grabbed his heavy coat, gloves, scarf, and hat.
After opening the drawing-room's French doors and stepping out, he took a deep bracing breath of the cold night air. A cloud of white left his mouth and floated towards the stars.
Simon set off following the footstep in the snow.
❄Chapter Twenty-three ❄
It took a great deal effort for Kathleen to trudge through the ankle deep snow. The stable hadn't seemed so far when she started out, but it took her forever to reach the stable doors. She fell a couple of times and each time it had taken longer to rise. Kathleen was exhausted by the time she reached the stable.
She leaned against the doors for a moment and stared at the millions of stars in the heavens. Kathleen was happy it wasn't snowing, but it still was cold.
If I survive this night, I will ask Simon to take me to the nearest posting house. What was the use in staying? Clarissa was winning.
After her short rest, Kathleen stood straighter and eyed the large stable doors. She tried pulling on the handle. It didn't budge.
Kate looked down. Snow blocked the door's movement. She slowly got down on her knees and pushed the snow away from the door as much as she could. It was fresh snow and not hard packed so it was easier to scoop away with her bare hands.
Her hands felt so frozen after she had finished that she couldn't feel the door handle. Kate placed her hands under her arms to try to warm them a bit.
She tried jumping in place to keep her blood circulating. It didn't do much to warm her, but Kate felt stronger.
Her two hand wrapped around the handle of one door. Kate couldn't possibly open both doors. All she needed was a small gap between the doors so she could slip through.
Kathleen pulled and tugged until there was a wide enough gap to inch her way inside if she sucked in her stomach.
Finally, she was inside the dark stable. It was still cold but nothing like it was outside. She heard the restless movements of the horses and the scurry of small feet. It couldn't be rats. Most stables housed cats to take care of that problem.
It is probably a cat on the hunt. I hope it is just a cat.
Kate moved further into the stable and not so near the door. She wasn't able to shut it complete so cold air was invading the warmer stable. She won't, at least, freeze to death. Kate will have to wait until morning to return to the house.
Where are you, Simon, when I need you?
She turned quickly when Kate heard the door open. Her eyes opened wide when she saw Simon standing in the stable doorway.
Simon and Kathleen stared at each other for a moment. He turned to tug the door closed. He turned back to Kate and took a couple of steps towards her removing his heavy coat and gloves.
“Why did leave you the house? You could have frozen to death outside, love.”
Simon placed his heavy coat around Kate's shoulders and the over-sized gloves on her hands. “There. That should help.”“Thank you.” Kate shivered. “The snow was so beautiful with the moon and stars. I couldn't resist stepping outside for just a moment, but when I tried to return, the door was locked.”
“Strange. We never lock that door.” Simon smiled. “Then you didn't flee because of the racket going on outside my door?”
“What racket?”
“I will explain later. Right now we need to keep warm for the night.”
Simon glanced around the stable and then up towards the hayloft.
“Can you climb, my dear?”
Kate looked confused until she realized he was referring to the loft.
“The hayloft?”
“Yes, we should be rather toasty up there above the horses. They put out a tremendous amount of heat and it rises.”
“I can try, Simon. You need to take your coat and gloves back. I can't climb with those.”
Kate removed the coat from her shoulders and the gloves. She handed them back to Simon.
They both moved to the ladder and looked up.
“Perhaps I should go first,” Simon said. “I want to make sure the rungs can hold our weight.”
Kate just nodded before Simon began to climb. It wasn't long before he disappeared into the dark loft. She then saw him lean over the side.
“All right. Take it nice and slow,” Simon Ordered.
Kate tentative placed one foot on the rung and held onto the sides with both hands, but she found that impossible when she stepped to the next rung. Her nightrail and wrapper got in her way. She had to lift the garments with one hand and hold onto her precarious perch with the other
.
She made it up the ladder at a slower pace than Simon. Kate didn't dare look down. She was about three steps from the top when Simon leaned over as far as he dared and grabbed hold of her bringing Kate the rest of the way to the loft.
Hay was in big piles all across the small area. Simon had placed his large coat on a pile of hay closer to the animals below them.
He gave her a half-bow since he was on his knees and grinned. “Your bower awaits, my lady.”
Kate couldn't help her giggle. “Thank you, kind sir.”
❄Chapter Twenty-four ❄
Kate sat down on the large coat. Simon wrapped a horse blanket over her leg.
“This may be a little scratchy, but the horses seem to think these blankets warm them.” Simon laid down beside her.
Kate sniffed the blanket. “They smell clean or rather they smell like clean hay.”
Simon sat down beside her and reached into his jacket pocket for the snacks he pilfered from the pantry.
“Are you hungry? I took these from the kitchen. There are for tomorrow or rather today, but I doubt Cook will miss them.”
The little cakes were flat and crumbly, but Kate took one anyway.
“Starving.”
They fell silent for a moment as they finished their treat until Kate couldn't stand it anymore. “You were going to tell me about the racket in the hall.”
Simon turned to face her so she did the same. “I am a little embarrassed and I feel like such a cad, but she drove me to it.”
“What did you do, Simon?”
He didn't answer for a moment. “I worked late in my study on estate matters. When the numbers began to blur, I knew it was time to go to bed.”
“What happen?” Kate's stomach tightened.
Am I jealous? Of course, I'm jealous.
“I had just poured myself a brandy when I heard a sound coming from my bed. Clarissa was in my bed giving me … Nevermind that. Needless to say, I was angry.”
“What did you do?”
“I grabbed her and toss her our my door in her, ah, all-together. You get my meaning. I threw her clothes into the hall later. It was not the gentlemanly thing to do, but I reached the end of my patience with the woman.”
