by Jaci Burton
This time, he didn’t smile. “I’m just a guy. A guy with a lot of flaws.”
“No one is perfect. I’m not looking for perfect.”
Just someone to love me.
She didn’t say it, but the words were there, hanging suspended somewhere between thought and voice. She so wanted to say it, but was too afraid she wouldn’t like the response—if there even was one.
And maybe she didn’t want a response—not from Rick. Maybe she just wanted to make up his reply in her head. After all, wasn’t all this a fantasy anyway?
And wasn’t love the ultimate fantasy?
He kissed her, a perfect kiss that was no fantasy at all. His mouth against hers, coaxing a response that was oh so real. She held on to that reality, the feel of his body, so hot and hard against her. That’s what she wanted, what she needed tonight.
And the way he touched her—the slow glide of his hands down the bare flesh of her back—was both perfect and frustrating. She wanted to make it last forever, but she wanted to hurry up, get naked, feel his skin against hers.
And yet out here on the balcony, the night was oh so right. Warm, a soft breeze ruffling the hem of her dress, and Rick’s mouth intoxicating her senses.
He backed her against the wall, his body following, pressing against hers. All that hard male flesh she wanted access to was impeded by clothing. That wasn’t going to do at all.
She pulled away from his kiss, pressed her hands to his chest, and he took a step back.
“What’s wrong?”
She smiled. “Nothing at all.” She swept her hands down the planes of his chest, pressed in with the tips of her fingers—nothing but a solid wall of muscle. She felt like such a . . . girl around him, soft where he was hard. She couldn’t remember ever being with a man who’d made her feel so feminine before.
She let her hands wander farther south, reached for his belt buckle, sliding his zipper down, reveling in the way he sucked in a breath. She let her body slide down with her hands, her legs parting as she sat on her heels.
“Damn, Ava.”
“I wish I could have you naked out here,” she whispered, more to herself than him. She’d love to see the moonlight washing over his magnificent body.
But now she focused on one part of him. She tugged on his jeans, just enough to pull them over his hips, giving her the freedom to reach in and pull out his cock. He hissed when she wrapped her hand around it, which only heightened her pleasure, making her want to prolong his. There was something so intoxicating about being in control of a man.
She stroked him, slow and easy, loving the feel of him in her hand. She tilted her head back to watch his face, the tight strain reflected there, the barely leashed control.
That’s what she always saw, what she always felt in Rick—control. Tonight, she wanted to shatter his control.
She leaned forward and licked the thick crest. It was warm, soft, and a salty pearl of fluid spilled onto her tongue. She curled her tongue around the head, then covered it with her lips.
Rick groaned, tangled his fingers in her hair.
“Sweet Jesus, Ava, that’s so good.”
Was that his control slipping just a bit?
He pumped his hips forward, feeding her his cock. She tilted her head back farther, giving him access to her mouth. He tightened his hold on her hair as she took him in. And then he pulled out, slid in again, developed a rhythm of back and forth, the same way he fucked her.
It made her wet, made her nipples and clit tingle as he fucked her mouth with slow, deliberate movements that drove her crazy.
This was supposed to be for Rick. How could this turn her on so much? How could she be the one losing control?
She removed her mouth, licked her lips, loved seeing the dark desire in his eyes. She reached under him and found the sac containing his balls, massaged them, and his lips parted. Now he was the one who tilted his head back and groaned, the sound harsh and filled with need. She grabbed the base of his cock and this time she did take control, compressing her lips over his shaft and letting her tongue slide along the underside as she rolled her mouth over his length.
“Ava. Stop. You’re going to make me come.”
There was no way she was going to stop, not with his balls tightening in her hand, his whole body tensing and jerking as she loved him with her mouth, her lips, and her tongue. She wanted him to come apart for her the way she had done for him. She took a deep breath and took him in deeper.
“Christ. Oh, fuck, Ava.”
He jerked, thrust his cock against the roof of her mouth, and jettisoned all that sweet come into her mouth. Ava felt the spill of her own moisture against her panties, the quiver of desire at his climax. She held on to him until he was empty, his breath ragged, until he palmed the wall for support.
Rick held his hand out for her and she reached for it. He lifted her to a standing position and before she could utter a word his mouth covered hers, his tongue sweeping in to take the last of his own flavor from her.
Passion exploded inside her, and all the control she’d held was gone. He curved his hands along her hips, her thighs, then raised her dress and smoothed his fingers along the silk of her panties. He pulled them aside and palmed her sex—her ripe, throbbing pussy craving the touch of his hard, calloused hand. Oh, the way he rubbed her felt so good, sent sparks to her clit. She lifted on her toes to reach for more of that sensation, arching her pelvis toward his hand.
“That’s it,” he whispered, his voice the sensual darkness against her ear. “Come on, baby.”
He inserted one, then two fingers inside her, driving his palm against the swollen nub while he fucked her with his fingers. The scent of him, his taste, all swirled around her, mixing with the heady pleasure of his masterful hand. Suddenly she was falling, unable to stop the rush of her climax. She thrust against him over and over while he fucked her with relentless strokes, her pussy spasming around him in waves of nearly unbearable pleasure.
Panting, she laid her head on his shoulder while he withdrew his fingers, moved around behind her and said, “We’re not anywhere near finished yet. Fucking your pussy with my fingers got me hard again.”
He led her inside, to the spacious living room. She thought they were going to the bedroom, but instead he took her to the edge of the sofa and stopped there.
“I need to fuck you while you’re wearing this dress. It’s been driving me crazy all night.”
She heated at the visual of him doing just that. She leaned back against him, twining her arms up and around his neck. Rick reached around to her breasts, covered them with his hands, his thumbs scraping over her nipples. Even through the material of her dress she felt it, the tingles of pleasure shooting straight to her pussy.
“These have been driving me crazy all night, too.” He held her breasts in his hands, drove against her buttocks with his cock.
Ava hissed out a breath. “You’re driving me crazy. Fuck me now.”
“What’s the matter? Don’t you like this?” He pulled the bodice of her dress down and filled his hands with her breasts, teasing her nipples with his fingers. The contact was electric, shot straight to her pussy.
“Yes. I like it. A lot. Fuck me.”
His low laugh vibrated against her back. “You were a little more reserved when we first met. You’re a hellion now.”
“You made me that way. Now fuck me.”
“I think I get the hint.” She heard the laughter in his voice, but also heard the hard edge of desire, knew he was as aroused as she was.
He bent her over the sofa. She held on to the edge while he lifted her dress over her hips and pulled her panties down, blazing a trail of kisses along the way. By the time he made it back up to her hips, her legs were shaking.
“Rick.”
“Yeah.”
“Hurry up.”
His laugh only made her hotter, quivering in anticipation while she waited for him to apply a condom. He hadn’t even bothered to zip up his jea
ns after their episode out on the balcony, and he pressed against her now, his skin to hers, his cock searching between her folds until he thrust hard inside her.
She gasped, arched her back, her pussy clenching around him as waves of pleasure shot through her.
“That what you wanted?”
She let out a moan, tilted her head back. “Yes.”
He held on to her hips and drove harder, deeper this time.
“Like that?”
“Oh, yes. Give me more.” Exactly what she wanted—to be connected to him in this most primal way. To not think about anything except this joining, the way he fucked her, the way he powered hard so he could get deeper inside her, like that was the only thing that mattered to him.
It was the only thing that mattered to her.
Until he reached around and strummed her clit with one hand while he continued to pound her with relentless strokes. The sensations were powerful, and with every touch her pussy gripped him tighter.
He leaned across her back, his hand never leaving her pussy.
“I like the way your pussy grips me. Do you know I can tell when you’re getting ready to come?”
“Yes. I feel it, too.”
“I want you to come on my dick, Ava. I want to feel every muscle inside your pussy squeezing me when you go off. Come on, baby, make me come.”
His voice made her wet, made her pussy tremble. She’d never had a man talk to her like this. She’d never felt so incredibly one with a man before.
It was heaven. No one had ever fucked her like this. No one. And she realized as Rick gripped her hips and thrust hard, pulled out, and powered inside her again, that she didn’t want this to end.
She wanted more of this. More than just tonight.
He continued to murmur against her ear, moving to the back of her neck. And when he bit down lightly as he fucked her, that was it. She spiraled out of control, climaxing in giant waves that took her breath and forced her to grip the edge of the sofa for balance.
“Oh fuck,” Rick said behind her, and held tight to her hips, his body glued to hers while he shuddered and groaned behind her.
She couldn’t move, could barely form a coherent sentence. Fortunately, she didn’t have to, because Rick picked her up and carried her to the bedroom. He helped her take off her dress, then pulled the covers back and, after he undressed, he climbed in bed behind her, pulling her against him before he wrapped his arms around her.
He kissed the back of her neck before his breathing evened out and she knew he’d fallen asleep.
She felt safe . . . loved.
Love? Was that what she felt?
Yes. It was. She’d never felt it before. It made her giddy and nauseous and scared shitless. And hopeful.
Maybe this could work after all.
She drifted off with a smile on her face.
Ava woke the next day alone in her bed, immediately squelching the feeling of disappointment.
Okay, so it was ten-thirty. They’d been up late. And she already knew Rick never slept in. Maybe he’d gone off to get coffee somewhere.
She showered and packed, a sense of reluctance settling over her. Maybe Lacey had been right about this place having a magical lure. Though admittedly, Ava hadn’t enjoyed her time here until Rick had showed up. He’d made this trip special. Which didn’t say much at all about her friendship with Lacey.
Ava would always be friends with Lacey, but she had a feeling they were going off in opposite directions now. And that made her sad, but it was time to face reality. Ava wanted no part of the life Lacey led. And Lacey was a grown woman now. Ava couldn’t mother her or force her to do what she wanted her to do. Lacey had to make her own choices, even if Ava thought they were bad choices. There was nothing Ava could do about it, except be there for her friend if and when the bottom dropped out of Lacey’s life.
It was time to let go, time for Ava to concentrate on her own life, her own future. It was time to make some decisions about what she was going to do with that life.
And who was going to be in it.
The door opened and her heart did a little leap at the sight of Rick walking in with two coffees in hand. She smiled.
“Good morning.”
“Wow, already showered and packing?”
“The bed gets cold and empty when you’re not in it. It’s like an automatic wake-up call.”
He set the coffees down and came over to her, pulled her into his arms and kissed her. When he pulled away, her toes were curling and her nipples beaded against her bra.
“I like that,” he said, rubbing his thumb over her bottom lip.
She liked it, too.
He handed her a cup of coffee and they went outside on the balcony to drink it.
“I’ll miss this place.” She looked out over the turquoise water, as calm and peaceful in the morning as the lazy town it blanketed. It was already warm, though at least there was a bank of clouds this morning instead of heavy, hot sun.
“Yeah, it is kind of nice.”
“I might want to come back here someday.”
He glanced over at her, his expression unfathomable. “Well, maybe you will. You can always come with Lacey.”
Not with him. With Lacey.
She shrugged. “Maybe. Not sure Lacey and I will be hanging out much anymore.”
“Yeah? Why’s that?”
“I’ve come to the realization that we need to go our separate ways. We have nothing in common anymore.”
He nodded. “It happens sometimes. You’re probably making the right choice.”
He said it so matter-of-factly, as if twenty years of friendship meant nothing. Her emotions were tied in knots, like her stomach.
“What?”
“You just made it sound so easy. As if walking away from someone close to you would mean nothing.”
He shrugged. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve never felt close to anyone.”
She drew her knees up to her chest, pondered how that would feel. To be so isolated, so alone.
“Don’t feel sorry for me, Ava.”
“I don’t feel sorry for you. Okay, maybe I do. You’re too old to have gone that long without having someone . . . some attachments in your life.”
He shrugged. “I’m fine with it.”
“Are you? Are you really?”
He opened his mouth, no doubt to shoot off some smartass retort. This time, she wasn’t going to let it happen.
“Rick. Tell me.”
He stopped then. Looked at her. “I had shitty parents. So did Bo. Not everyone comes from a great family. So Bo and I bonded, and for a long time we had each others’ backs.”
“Did the courts take you away from your families?”
“Off and on. You know how it is.”
“Yes, I do. Too often the removal isn’t permanent, though many parents should never get their kids back.”
He looked over the balcony. “Amen to that. There were times I was happier with my foster parents than I ever was at home. But I knew better than to get settled or to think I’d stay.”
“Because they’d send you back home.”
He nodded.
Ava ached for him, for the child who’d craved stability and someone to love him, but had none. “I’m sorry.”
He half turned and gave her a smile, but she saw the sadness in his eyes. “Not your fault, darlin’.”
She stood and went to him, wrapped her arms around him and laid her cheek against his back, wishing she could love him, that he’d let her. But she knew anything she said right now would only be taken as pity. And that’s not at all what she felt for him.
“You can’t fix me, Ava. I’m a grown man. I survived it.”
She squeezed him a little tighter. “It doesn’t make the past hurt any less, or the memories go away.”
She was in love with him. She knew it now for certain. He’d been through so much, could have turned out so differently. He could be a prick, treating people like dirt, like he’d
been treated. Instead, he had a heart, emotions, warmth, and passion and he needed to give that to someone.
Only he didn’t see it. He didn’t see it and Ava didn’t know how to make him see what he needed.
Rick didn’t form attachments like she did. Maybe it was easy for him to walk away. Like it would be easy for him to walk away from her.
A man like him, with his background and the way he was raised . . . yeah, Ava could certainly see him leaving and not looking back.
He turned, smiled down at her, and kissed her. “The past is dead. Leave it there.”
She blinked back the rush of tears that threatened to burst. “You’re right. Everyone needs to look forward. Even me.”
He tipped her nose with his finger. “That’s right. Which means that you need to stop thinking about vacations in Mexico and get back to reality.”
She laughed. “So true. It’s time for me to start thinking about my doctorate degree. I have to find a school.”
“Yeah. Time for me to get back to work, too.”
“I guess this is the end of the fun, then.”
“Fun never has to end if you don’t want it to.”
He winked and smiled, and dammit if her stupid heart didn’t feel lighter at his words.
She didn’t need him. Love between them would never work. When they got back to the States, it was over between them.
And that was that. She wasn’t going to think about it anymore.
Much.
Fortunately, Bo must have dragged Lacey out of bed, because Rick’s phone rang signaling they were ready to go.
“Ready to exit the Garden of Eden?”
“I suppose so.”
He grabbed their bags and they went downstairs. Bo had already brought Lacey’s car around to the front, then went to fetch his bike. Rick packed Ava’s bag in the trunk of Lacey’s car.
“We’ll follow behind you.”
She nodded.
He put his hands on her hips, kissed her. Her stomach fluttered. Really, she wasn’t a teenager, and they’d been intimate several times. His kiss shouldn’t still affect her like this.
