“I told him we would have a fake kiss,” said Seth.
“That wasn’t fake,” grumbled Jason. “Even if it was, what will all our friends say when they see you kissing somebody other than me on the screen.”
“We discussed this,” whined Seth.
Ethan joined in. “And they’ll say, ‘Wow, they faked it so well that it looks real. Haven’t you ever seen actors kiss onscreen, and you’re certain that they really got down with each other? It happens all the time.”
“Yes, and I hoped they were single.”
A loud groan rose from the crew. The director turned toward me. “We’ll need to shoot this scene at least three more times. Can you get this man calmed down enough for us to proceed?”
Jason growled. “I think we’re ready to go home.” I barely heard the words. It sounded like a toddler’s whacks on a stainless steel Dutch oven with Grandma’s favorite spoon.
Seth desperately tried to talk him down. He reached out for Jason’s hands. “It’s almost over. You know what we’ll get paid. I’ll tell everyone how fake the kiss was and what a disaster it would be to kiss Ethan for real.”
“Hey, I heard that!”
I held a hand up to my mouth and laughed into it. I considered what Daniel might have thought years ago if I’d fake-kissed somebody else for a commercial. He’d be apoplectic. In my head, I could see the vein bulging out in sharp relief on his forehead and the burning anger rising from his neck up through his face. The image in my head made me laugh again.
I heard a soft voice in my ear. “Seriously, this is crazy.” It was Ethan. He stood with his damp body close to me and dropped the volume of his voice to a whisper. “I’ve heard from Seth about scenes like this between them. It’s the first time I’ve seen one erupt in public.”
The clanging spoon started up again. “But it looks so damned real. Can you do one that looks fake? Everybody will laugh when they see it. Isn’t that good for business? Happy people spend a lot of money.”
I heard Seth’s sigh from clear across the soundstage. “That’s ridiculous.”
“Can you imagine what the guys at the gym will say? They might not speak up to my face, but I’ll know what they’re thinking.”
The director stepped in. “Okay, I think I’ve seen enough. We’ve wasted enough time. I’ll need to discuss all of this with Kenneth, but Ethan, Seth—the two of you are free to go. Crew members wrap it up.” He rotated his hand in a circle to signal that everyone should get moving.
Ethan started to apologize to me. “Honestly, Seth said he’d sorted all of this out.”
“No need to say you’re sorry. In the long run, your friendship and their sanity are more important.”
“Aww, thanks, man.” Ethan hugged me and left damp marks all over my jacket and dress shirt.
“Why don’t you go get dressed.”
“Oh, yeah. I guess that is a good idea. I’ll find a towel.”
The last I saw of Jason, he was walking out with a smug expression of triumph on his face. He held Seth’s hand, but a sad, dejected Seth hung his head and stared at the ground.
The director spoke in a low tone with Seth gone and Ethan far enough away that he couldn’t hear. “What a disaster. I’ve seen worse, but it’s sad because the camera loves this pair. Unfortunately, I don’t think we can even go with those first two commercials we completed. The boyfriend is far too sensitive.”
“Agreed. The last thing I need is a controversy. Jason might be the type who would complain to any reporter who might listen that we forced Seth into an acting performance that he didn’t want to give. I think you need to scrap the whole thing.”
“Do you have any other couples we can use? I think the concepts and the scripts are perfect. We only need handsome bodies.”
17
Daniel
The wounds left behind by my disastrous morning with Kenneth were finally starting to scab over and heal when I received an unexpected text message. It was short and simple and sent at 8:00 a.m.:
“Can I give you a call?”
I knew that it would be an insult to say no, but I needed some time to steel myself for the sound of Kenneth’s voice. I knew that it was an opportunity to apologize for my moment of madness, but I didn’t know how to put it into appropriate words. I waited until after lunch to respond. My message back was equally as frank and direct:
“Of course. I’m alone in my office. Call me any time.”
Less than five minutes later, the phone rang. It was Kenneth, and his voice was halting and hesitant on the other end.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt your day, and I can make this quick, but I thought it was better to speak directly than through an exchange of text messages.”
I worried that he was about to blow me off forever. He could be ready to tell me that it was all too much. My instincts said that I needed to wedge the apology into the conversation before Kenneth got a chance to say goodbye.
In my best sweet but not cloying voice, I said, “It’s not an interruption. Honestly, I’m glad I get to hear your voice again. Before we discuss any other matters, please accept my apology.”
“Apology?”
I was startled when Kenneth sounded like he didn’t know what I meant. I scrambled to explain. “The proposal. You know. When I dove into the deep end of the pool the last time we talked. I’m sorry.”
I rubbed a sweaty hand on my pants while I waited for a response. After at least 30 seconds of silence, Kenneth dismissed my concerns. “I don’t think there’s any need to apologize. We were...on different pages. Anyway, that’s not why I called. I wondered whether you’d like to go to lunch. I’ve got a different topic—a favor I want to ask of you. It has to do with business. We can focus on that and maybe come up with ways we can help each other.”
I created another deep pool of silence between us while I thought about the request. According to his comments, Kenneth didn’t have our relationship on his mind. He wanted to talk business, but I wasn’t sure that I could do that without a hairpin, accidental turn into personal matters. His presence stirred my emotions. Unfortunately, I feared that if I said no to lunch, it might be the last I’d ever hear from him.
My voice was weak when the words came out, but I did my best to sound cheerful. “Of course. Yes. Where? Milwaukee? Chicago?”
“I’ll drive up there. I’ve got a new client in Oak Creek, so I’ll be near you anyway.”
Those words “near you” sparked thoughts of Kenneth in my arms. I needed to get off the phone before the rising emotional waves threatened to drown me. “Tomorrow? Or the next day?”
“The next day is perfect. Can we go to that cute little place just south of downtown? The Townie? Is that it?”
The crashing waves weakened the levee. I didn’t want Kenneth to hear my voice cracking. “Yes, that’s good. I’ll make the reser...vation.” The last two syllables hung in my throat. Before he could say anything else, I barked out, “I’ve got to go. Coming, Blake!”
I didn’t hear the rest of what was said. I dropped my phone on my desk and covered my eyes with my hands. It was all more difficult than I expected. I had two days to pull myself together before I saw Kenneth again in the flesh.
On the morning before the lunch, I pulled Blake into my office before he could get wrapped up in a project on his computer. He stumbled over his big feet and slapped my hands away from his body.
“What’s up, Daniel? And be gentle. Hunter made me work out with him at the gym. I think every muscle I have is aching.”
I explained the upcoming lunch encounter. Blake sat in a chair on the opposite side of my desk. He listened intently, but I couldn’t read his face.
Finally, I blurted out all of the emotions inside me. “And I’m not the kind of guy who pleads, but I’m feeling desperate. We’re so good together with such potential. If we ignore that, it’s a terrible waste. Despite my stupidity when I run my mouth, Kenneth should be with me.”
Blake waited for a few s
econds to gauge whether I would continue. “Are you finished?”
“I am. Do you think I’m a hopeless case? Is that why you’ve got that flat expression on your face?” I motioned in the air like I was cleaning a window so that I could see through it to the real Blake inside.
“Hopeless isn’t the word, but there is a term I’m considering.”
“Well, out with it. I’m a mess. This isn’t the usual me. Kenneth turns me into a wreck, a shell of myself.”
“Understand that I don’t mean to be negative, and you’ve helped me through so much. You’ve been a cheerleader for Hunter and me. You’ve been a great friend to Iris and Ollie, too. This company wouldn’t exist without you.”
As I listened to the litany of effusive praise, I feared what Blake had to say. Would my best friend rip me up one side and down the other? Had he finally had enough of my whining and moping? Would he say what I most feared? It’s over, Daniel. Shape up and forget about him. Now.
Blake rubbed his chin. I didn’t notice it earlier, but his razor stubble was thicker than usual. Maybe he was growing it out for a beard. I tried to tuck a reminder in the back of my mind. I should keep noticing and compliment him if he did grow it out.
“Daniel, I think it’s one word, and I know it’s not a nice one, but the one word—selfish.”
I blinked. It wasn’t what I expected to hear. As Blake mentioned only seconds before, I tried hard to be as selfless as possible with my friends. Was I different around Kenneth? I drummed the fingers of one hand on the surface of my desk.
“Do you think so?”
“Should I spell it out? Maybe I should give you more of an explanation.”
I tensed and readied myself. “Please do, but be gentle. I don’t usually think kindly of selfish people. I’m pretty hard on myself about this already. Keep that in mind.”
“I thought about both stories. I thought about them long and hard because I want to be helpful. If I can.”
“Both stories?”
“What you told me about ten years ago and then the night at Kenneth’s place down in Chicago. I also thought about how you reacted to him at the hockey game.”
“Do you think I was selfish when we were together? You weren’t there back then, and you weren’t in Chicago. How do…”
Blake held up his right hand. “Don’t make me add defensive to the list.”
I leaned back. “Okay. Point taken. Tell me what you saw.”
“Both times that you broke up with Kenneth, he asked for space that didn’t involve you. I don’t think he raised the questions in the most artful, sensitive ways possible, but it’s an emotional time. None of us are articulate when we’re scared. You didn’t say that he told you to go away. It sounded like you were the one who broke up with him by disappearing.”
“But he wanted to see other people. That was like a knife to the heart.”
Blake slowly nodded his head. “Not sensitive, but this time he only said he wasn’t ready. Both times you assumed that it was a dismissal you. Is it possible that it was only a rejection of the idea of a long-term commitment? Was it an attempt to buy some more time to be sure? You were only together for two years.”
“How long has Iris been with Ollie?”
“Somewhere between one and two years.”
“And they’re engaged.”
Blake frowned. “How long do you think I’ve been with Hunter?”
“More than a year.”
“And are we engaged?”
“You came close. I remember when you told us all that you knew that Hunter would ask you soon.”
“But it didn’t happen—right? Did I run?”
I understood. “Okay, yeah, I get it, but you aren’t happy about it.”
Blake placed his hands on the desk and leaned toward me. “Maybe this is where you genuinely don’t get it, or maybe it’s the point where you need to listen to Kenneth a little bit more. I wouldn’t define my feelings as not happy about it. I’m in love with Hunter, and I’m content. He can have all the time he needs.”
“You want him to marry you.”
“Yes. Of course, I do. You’ve listened to me. But does Hunter’s failure to commit and exchange rings make me want to leave?”
“No. I guess not.”
“And why do you think that is?”
“I think I’m a little lost.”
Blake spoke slowly and clearly. I’d watched him as he gave computer instructions to the kids at the youth center. He used that voice with me. “My desire to have that ring and tuck away a symbol of Hunter’s commitment is about me. He doesn’t need it. He’s made that abundantly clear, and he doesn’t want it right now. That’s him. I’m not selfish enough to demand that our entire relationship unfold my way.”
“In other words, you think I’m behaving like a selfish little brat of a kid, at least as far as Kenneth is concerned.”
One corner of Blake’s mouth curled up into a half-smile. “You came up with that observation, but I won’t object.”
I took a deep breath and accepted all that Blake said. When I thought about the upcoming lunch with Kenneth, my nerves started to come back.
“What do I say at lunch?”
“With Kenneth?”
“No, with Iris. Who do you think? Yes. What should I say when I’m with Kenneth.”
Blake rubbed his chin again. “I do have a suggestion. Why don’t you get ready to try and concentrate on listening to him instead of planning what you want to say.”
I knew the conversation would be tough, but I thanked Blake. His advice gave me a focus for lunch, and it helped calm my nerves. I was used to setting the agenda and taking control, but I convinced myself that I could meet the challenge. I had less than two days to prepare before I unveiled my new approach.
The hug when I greeted Kenneth was warm and a little bit awkward. We exchange brief pleasantries, and, after we placed food orders with our sever, Kenneth launched into his description of a recent failed commercial shoot.
“And then Seth’s boyfriend stepped in. The director’s assistant taught the two models how to do a kiss for the camera that wasn’t a real kiss. They had it down pat, but it was too much for the boyfriend. He literally stepped right into the middle of the shoot.”
“What did the director do?”
“He let Seth try to calm the guy down, but the handwriting was on the wall. Less than half an hour later, the director shut it all down, and we essentially have half a commercial shot. Perhaps, we could salvage a 30-second shot, but I expect Seth to call any day and say his boyfriend made him nix that, too.”
While I listened, Blake’s words rolled around in the back of my mind. I was there primarily to hear Kenneth and not jump in and dominate the conversation. I said, “That’s horrible. Will you try again? Surely, there are more models out there.”
“Yes, plenty of models, but I want these to be right for my concept.”
“Right?”
“It needs to be two gay men or straight men who can play gay that look like they belong together. We know from our market research that gay male consumers make up almost 70% of my sales. I want to entice all of the married gay couples out there. So, they need to see two guys that look like them. Does that make sense?”
I wasn’t sure where Kenneth’s story was leading, so I leaned back in preparation to hear more. I offered verbal encouragement to continue when I said, “Yes, I understand.”
“So, here’s where you come in, and I hope it’s not too big of a request or an imposition. I wondered whether you might know any couples you’ve matched with your business who would be excellent in one of my TV commercials. Previous experience in front of a camera isn’t necessary.”
“I’d love to help out, but I’m not sure how ethical it would be for me to approach clients on behalf of someone else’s business interests.”
Kenneth tapped the table with his index finger. “That’s not what I mean. These would be couples who became more than acquaintances t
hrough the process. Like Hank and Luke, for example, who are your friends now.”
I started to open my mouth, but Kenneth held up his hand.
“Don’t answer right now. Think about it. If you can’t help, that’s fine, but I’m sure that perfect couple is out there—somewhere.”
I wanted to offer assistance. There was no question about my desire, but no one came to my mind immediately. Like Kenneth requested, I tucked it in the back of my mind and focused my full attention on him.
“There’s one more item I want to discuss,” said Kenneth.
I almost dove in and asked about a future date, but I stopped myself before the words rolled off my tongue. “Go ahead. You’ve got my ear.”
“It’s about the night at my place. I know I’m late with the request to talk about it, but I don’t want to let it hang out there like a ridiculously ugly shirt that nobody wants to mention.”
I leaned forward. I couldn’t keep myself quiet any longer and vomited up a string of words. “I’m sorry for my behavior. I was stupid. Can we try again? Can we set up a date? Maybe dinner or a movie. We could combine both.”
Kenneth reached a hand across the table. Reflexively, I slid mine forward to weave our fingers together.
“I appreciate the apology, and I accept it, but as I said at my place, I’m not ready to move forward so fast.”
“We can slow down.”
Kenneth nearly stepped on the heels of my words. “I think we should try dates with other people. At least give that one more try. Perhaps Match Made can help me find my next man.”
18
Kenneth
With the help of the mirror in my bedroom, I straightened my tie while Sean looked over my shoulder. He was an expert assistant as always, but there was something odd about his demeanor.
“One more tug on that tie and then leave it in place. You’re beyond the point of making it better, and I think you’ve run out of jackets to try. It’s not all about the package anyway. Sometimes what’s inside the box is what counts.”
Reunited: Matchmakers Book 4 Page 12
