Monday morning Heidi pulled up to the post office and was surprised to see a truck in the parking lot. Was she late? She glanced at the clock on her dash. No, she was right on time. As she locked her car and headed around the back, she could see a man in the truck. Whoever it was, he must be waiting for his mail. No skin off her nose, let him wait.
Unperturbed, she unlocked the door and went inside. The accustomed scent of mail, that mix of paper and glue and dust met her, just like it did each morning. She relaxed a notch, knowing she could use something familiar after tossing and turning most of the night. She flipped on the lights and hung up her purse, ready to start her morning routine. A glance at the clock told her she had an hour before she had to unlock the front door. The man outside had a while to wait.
After the sort was finished and paperwork done, she went up front to unlock the door to the lobby. From there she could see the man climb from his truck and talk to the dog sitting on the front seat. The dog turned away so the man shut the door, then headed across the parking lot. It was Adam, she realized, and her pulse picked up. But he could get his mail from the box anytime, she never locked the mailbox room. What had he been waiting for?
Resisting the urge to check her hair and makeup, she took her place behind the counter and booted up the computer, nibbling at her bottom lip. It felt strange to be excited to talk to a man, maybe because she was no flirt. The whole situation felt a little bit as if she were being unfaithful to her husband, but that was silly. Brad had been gone for years. Yet, the feeling persisted, turning in the pit of her stomach.
The door beeped and she looked up with a smile, only to see Nancy. Her face fell and she worked to recover a pleasant expression. “Morning, Nancy.”
“Hello, my dear, any word on losing your beautiful home?”
The words felt like a slap to the face. Nancy had to know that if there was any new gossip in town, she’d be the one already spreading it. But the fact that Nancy was asking was proof that the ladies in the association could keep their mouths shut. “I’m afraid not.”
“Well, you better get moving with that review, or whatever it’s called.”
“Can I help you with anything, Nancy? Stamps maybe?” Heidi asked, ignoring the woman’s advice. She didn’t need to tell Nancy that she’d immediately started working on the demolition review. The first thing she’d done was look at the sign in her yard and it said her home was listed on the state historic register, which was good. According to her research, a builder could not get city building permits to tear down a building on a historic register until it had been cleared through the state preservation association. Maybe the mayor didn’t care about building permits and he’d skipped the whole process. But since her house was on the state registry she’d be sending her request for a review directly to the state register, which would go right over the mayor’s head.
“No, no, I’ll be on my way,” Nancy tutted. “Just checking—Oh! Why, hello Mister Williams!” she gushed, moving to one side to let the man enter.
Heidi blushed, and her response frustrated her.
“Ma’am,” Adam said with a nod to Nancy. Then he stood to one side holding the door, waiting for her to leave.
The woman waggled her fingers in farewell and exited the lobby.
Heidi realized she’d been holding her breath and she let it out with a whoosh.
Adam swaggered up to the counter. “Morning, Heidi,” he said with a grin.
“Morning, Adam.”
He leaned one elbow on the counter. “Do I have a package today? I’m expecting some painting equipment.”
Heidi stared at him dumbly. With him leaning on the counter like that, it felt as if he was in her personal space. And that wasn’t a bad thing but it felt both wonderful and wrong at the same time. “Oh, right.” She said, straightening her shoulders. “I don’t think I saw anything for you. Did you have a notice in your box?”
“Nope.”
She waited, thinking he’d elaborate. When he didn’t, she flushed. The blush rose up her neck, and her cheeks heated all the way into her hairline. “I’ll go check,” she said, motioning over her shoulder.
Once she was out of sight, she leaned against the wall and covered her face with her hands. What was happening? Why was she being so silly? Yes, Adam was an attractive man, but that didn’t mean she wanted to jump in his bed. She’d been alone for a long time and she’d made peace with it. She didn’t need a man to be happy.
But even the thought of being curled up under the covers next to Adam made her stomach tickle.
She puffed out a sigh and marched to the sorting bins. “Mail,” she said, determined to think about her job and only her job. Finding no packages for Adam, she hurried back to the customer counter. “I’m sorry, nothing this morning. Maybe it will be on the afternoon truck.”
He shrugged. “No huge rush. I was just in town this morning and figured I’d check.”
“Sorry,” she said again, as if it were her fault his paint supplies hadn’t arrived.
Adam offered her a heart-melting smile and a wink, then headed for the door. With his hand on the door, he paused and turned back.
Heidi’s eyes jumped up from his butt to his face.
“Say, did you ever find out more about that your house being torn down? What happened with that whole thing?”
A lie was on the tip of her tongue, but she’d learned her lesson at his house. He read her like a book. “I haven’t been able to find out much, to be honest, but I’m working on it,” she answered, proud of herself for coming up with a reasonable reply.
His expression grew more serious. “Well if I can be of any help, you know where to find me.”
She must have looked unsure, because he hesitated. “You do have my official address…”
She snorted, then smiled. “Yes, yes I do. Thank you. I’ll likely be calling on you for help.”
Adam offered a nod in farewell and headed out the door.
Heidi leaned over the counter to watch his purely-male swagger as he crossed the parking lot, then straightened and blew out another long sigh. Now she’d done it. He was going to help her and she couldn’t keep her mind on the matter at hand. How could one get sidetracked when their home was slated for demolition?
Chapter Seven
Mayor Winslow tilted the mirror on his desk for a better view of his beard. Cocking his head in the light, he lifted the silver scissors to snip at the bottom of his whiskers. The office door opened causing him to drop the scissors and his eyes clamped shut in frustration.
“Sorry, Mayor,” the thin, pale woman apologized, “I wanted to remind you about the meeting with the contractor at three tomorrow afternoon.”
He snapped closed the mirror and returned his scissors to his desk drawer. “I’m well aware of my schedule, thank you, Rachel.”
The woman hesitated, unsure if speaking again would bring down more wrath upon her.
His brows rose in question. “What is it now?” His words weren’t mean nor his voice raised, but there was no doubt that he was perturbed by the woman’s presence.
The secretary cleared her throat and straightened her shoulders. “You have mail sir. It’s on my desk.”
“Well, open and organize it,” he snapped. “You know I don’t have time for such menial things. Bring only the important items to me.”
“Yes, sir” Rachel replied as she stepped backward from the room, her head bowed. She quietly closed the door.
Mayor Winslow tipped back his chair and thoughtfully stroked his beard. Once the new viaduct was complete and a proper shopping mall built, this silly town was finally going to be something. His phone dinged and he retrieved if from the desktop. There was nothing he loved more than escaping into his online world of beard products. Throughout the day his phone would alert him about sales or new products from multiple beard accessory shops as well as social media posts about beards. One of these days, once he had his beard just the way he wanted it, he’d enter one of
those beard contests and bring home a trophy. That would show the doubters in this one-horse town that he was a winner!
“Oh, Pinterest,” he purred with a grin, clicking to open the app. A photo showing a man using a measuring tool to trim his beard popped open. “What delightful device is this?”
Heidi awakened early feeling tired and grumpy. She never slept well the night before a mission. Her brain refused to shut off and let her rest. She’d finally gotten up and made coffee. It was no use trying to sleep. Within an hour she’d have to roust Tyler out of bed anyway. Since that kid hit puberty, all he wanted to do was sleep. Well… sleep and eat.
Now waiting at the front door, she glanced at her watch and adjusted her bag on her shoulder. “Come on,” she hollered. “You’re going to be late!” She’d already been waiting ten minutes. This mission had her on edge, as well it should. What they planned to do was illegal.
“Tyler!” she called in frustration.
Then again, how many projects had the association taken on that were at best questionable and at worst a felony? Oh, they meant no harm, and what they did was for the town and people who lived there. It was just a good thing they’d never been caught.
“If you’re not down here in the next two minutes, I’m going to—”
Footsteps pounded overhead in the hall then down the stairs. Heidi blew out a frustrated breath. It was about time. She had called in sick, and she didn’t want her replacement to see her lurking about town. She needed to get into position and make sure everything was ready.
Once Tyler was safely dropped off at the high school, she parked behind the library and hefted her backpack onto her shoulder. She headed into the building, taking special care not to be seen, then took up her position at a window on the second floor, behind the encyclopedia stacks overlooking Main Street and the courthouse.
Michelle had been busy all morning working her magic and by one o’clock, all the women of the society were in position for Mission Rabid Racoon. After cancelling her appointments for the afternoon, she now stood at the front window of her salon with her high power binoculars, hidden behind a potted fern. She was on call in case anyone had trouble with their disguise.
Monique pretended to wipe tables in her tavern, but she’d been washing the same table for ten minutes. She stared out the front window and down the street toward the courthouse. Her part in the mission would come later, so until she got the signal she stayed put. A tourist jiggled the locked front door handle, then leaned forward to peer into the pub.
“We’re closed!” she hollered, not taking her gaze from the window.
Meanwhile on the other side of town, Sarah, out at recess with her class, strained her neck to see past the front lawn of the school and down the street. She double checked her cell phone for any new messages.
Mildred sat on a park bench in front of the courthouse, pretending to read a magazine. Next to her on the bench sat an oversized bag containing her disguise. Since it was a simple lab coat, wig, and thick cat-eye glasses, she would be able to manage it herself. Michelle had lectured her plenty about her disguise, but for now she was out front keeping watch.
Jessica had taken a personal day from driving the school bus and was inside the courthouse with her boys, waiting in line to register her car at the DMV counter. However, you’d never recognize her. Today she wore a long straight wig, trendy glasses, a ton of makeup, four-inch stilettos, and had extra-large bosoms. That morning Michelle had tucked the poor young mother into a tight sheath dress to accentuate the positives, or as they‘d teased, the distraction. Jessica had been shocked when her friend pulled out the bra she was to wear— it was huge! And now it was all she could do not to mess with the straps on the thing. She was concerned that one boobie was slipping lower than the other, but there was nothing she could do about it now. She loved being the woman on the inside on this mission, and she wasn’t about to blow it. Her role was to offer a disruption if needed and she was ready.
Latrice was actually the inside contact; being the night janitor at the courthouse, she had a key card for all the doors. She also knew which breaker turned off the security camera inside the building. Even with her leave of absence from attending meetings, she, like so many women through the years, was still a valued part of the society.
Heidi scrolled through her group texts, keeping one eye on the window. The weather had cooperated and warm spring sunlight beamed down on Main Street. Tourists rambled along the sidewalk and occasionally an irritated driver honked at a traffic tie up. The place looked 100% normal.
Her role as grand master was to monitor all the women and to manage their locations and communication. Even though she’d done this many times on multiple missions, her heartbeat still pounded in her ears.
Her phone dinged. It was from Sam, she was ready!
With shaking hands, Heidi took a deep breath and squared her shoulders, then sent out the group text, alerting the women that the show was ready to go. She requested roll call.
“Biker Chick ready,” Monique dinged in.
“Old Lady ready,” Mildred texted.
“Pink Hair ready,” Michelle sent.
“Sassy Momma ready,” Jessica answered.
“Buff and Shine ready,” Latrice added.
“Tot Teacher ready,” Sarah replied.
Sarah and Michelle were strictly stand-by backups on this mission, and hopefully they wouldn’t be needed, but each had a job to do if called upon. With any luck it wouldn’t come to that.
“We’re a go!” Heidi texted Sam, holding her breath with anticipation. Less than a minute later, her heart skipped a beat as Sam’s white van, now craftily labeled Rodney’s Rodent and Pest Control, lurched to a stop in front of the courthouse with its hazard lights flashing.
“Your sticker for the van is fantastic!” Heidi texted to Jessica, the one who’d created the vinyl sticker with her craft cutting machine.
“It is, isn’t it!” Jessica replied.
Sam jumped from the van and she was completely unrecognizable. She wore a baggy bright orange jumpsuit, big goggles, and an orange ball cap pulled low over her face. Hanging out from under the hat was stringy brown hair. No one would ever place her as the athletic blond dog walker.
She ran around the van and slid open the door where she yanked out a backpack and a plastic dog kennel that had been spray painted red. Wasting no time, she hurried up the courthouse steps.
At the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV) counter inside the courthouse, Jessica heard a commotion coming down the hall. “Wait here,” she said to her children, then hurried across the waiting room to peep her head around the corner. She could see Sam swinging the red dog kennel as she marched down the hall with a harried young security guard jogging by her side.
Jessica jumped back and gave her bra one good hitch. Looking down, she tried to gauge if the giant boobies were in place, but there was no time to mess with them now. She pursed her red lipsticked lips one last time and texted the group, “We’re in!”
“Look here,” Sam barked, sounding very serious and official. “You may not care about a rabid animal loose in the courthouse, but you should. If that thing bites somebody, they could die!”
A ripple of alarm passed through the DMV waiting room as they heard the words.
“Running interference,” Jessica texted to the group, then she hurried to where her children sat waiting. “You two sit right here and don’t say a word, you hear me? Momma’s gonna put on a little play. If you do as I say, you can each pick out a new Lego model at the store next time we go to Asheville, understand?”
The boys nodded their heads in unison.
She straightened and took a deep breath, ready to do her part. “Oh no!” she shrieked at the top of her lungs, scaring everyone at the DVM half out of their wits. “Where could he have gone?”
She ran into the hallway, screaming “Axel! Axel! Where are you, Axel?”
The guard with Sam, now passing the waiting room, turned to see
what the fuss was about. Increasing her speed, Sam continued down the hall.
“Sir! Sir!” Jessica screeched, grabbing the guard by the arm. “You’ve got to help me! My little Axel has disappeared!”
The guard tossed a concerned glance toward Sam’s retreating back as he peeled Jessica’s hand from his upper arm. “Calm down, ma’am. What’s the problem?”
“Axel is missing!” Jessica screamed into the poor man’s ear, pressing the boobies against his arm. “My baby is gone!”
“Everything will be okay, ma’am, come sit down and tell me where you last saw your child.”
Jessica, clicking along on her high heels with her fake boobies bouncing, followed the guard back into the DMV waiting room. The crowd in the waiting room stood agape, waiting to see what would happen next. Jessica wrung her hands and wailed loudly, rattling the light fixtures overhead. “Axel was right here, along with little Harley and Butch, and when I looked down, he was gone, ya’ll!”
The guard reached for his radio and Jessica grabbed his arm. “Wait a minute! Oh my goodness, wait just a minute!”
Everyone in the room stilled, staring at Jessica. She leaned to one side in order to see her children behind the guard. “Harley, honey,” she hollered to her little Robert. “Did momma bring Axel to the courthouse today?”
All eyes turned to Robert, who sat staring at his mother in awe. Jessica imperceptibly shook her head no, so Robert shook his head no as well.
“Oh, my goodness!” Jessica screamed, clutching her inflated chest. All heads turned back her way. “Here I go and scare ya’ll to death for nothing! I’m so sorry!”
The guard relaxed visibly and the people in the room shook their heads in disbelief.
“Oh, dear sir, I am so sorry I took ya’lls time!” she continued, her voice still far too loud and very nasal. “Can you forgive me? I always take little Axel everywhere, and I plumb forgot I took him to his Nana’s house today.”
Trouble on Main Street Page 7
