by Kat Mizera
The Blizzard had lost to Philadelphia tonight, so her points were abysmal. At least the Las Vegas Sidewinders had won, and she had several of their players, which got her a few points. Logan was on her team, and he had an assist tonight, which amounted to a point, but that was about all. The Blizzard wasn’t playing well right now as a team, but they had a lot of talent. From the outside looking in, she thought the travel was hard on them.
Alaska was so far away from everything, and a trip to the East Coast was the equivalent of a trip to Europe from some of the other cities around the league. There was a four-hour time difference, too, which screwed up their sleep, and she’d heard the guys talk about jet lag, dehydration, and other issues that had to do with travel. As far as her fantasy team went, it was annoying, but in real life, she felt bad for them. Yeah, they made a lot of money, but the Blizzard had never won a championship and they had a lot of turnover in both players and coaches.
She couldn’t help but wonder if Logan wanted to leave, too. He was good, a star up-and-coming player who’d gotten progressively better with each subsequent year. Though she’d never said it to anyone aloud, she loved watching him on the ice. He was as graceful as he was intense, which was an interesting set of characteristics for a hockey player, but there was no other way to describe how he moved.
Damn. She was totally infatuated with him as a hockey player and would have given almost anything to be on the ice with him just once. That was never going to happen, of course, so she tried not to think about it, but it was a fantasy of hers. One of them anyway.
Maybe if she asked him to do some sort of skating clinic for the team… Ugh. She needed to stop going down that road and focus on reality. In another month, her college hockey career would be over, and she had to think about her business degree. Maybe without hockey, she could go full-time and finish in two years instead of three, so she wouldn’t have to strip anymore.
Her phone buzzed and she looked down to see a text from Ryder, which surprised her.
RYDER: I need a favor.
CASSIE: If I can.
RYDER: My dog, Coco, got away from the pet-sitter and she’s just a teenager so she’s nervous. Do you think you could help look for Coco? Normally I would call Sara, but she’s pregnant and not feeling so hot, so I hate to bug her at night.
CASSIE: Sure. Get me in touch with the pet-sitter. What kind of dog is it?
RYDER: Bernese mountain dog. She’s huge, but super sweet. Just always into mischief and barely a year old, so still has all the energy of a puppy.
CASSIE: I’ll do my best.
RYDER: I’m happy to pay you for your time.
CASSIE: Don’t be ridiculous. Text me the info.
She’d already swung her legs over the edge of the bed and was pulling on jeans. It was cold as hell out, but she was a sucker for a lost dog, and anyway, Ryder was a nice guy, despite his playboy reputation. He and Logan were exactly the kind of guys she tended to go for, which always ended in disaster. Luckily, she was happy being friends with them, and helping out with the lost dog would hopefully wear her out so she could sleep when she got home.
She punched the address he sent her into the mapping app on her phone and headed in that direction. What better way to cure insomnia than searching for a lost puppy on a freezing cold winter night?
6
The team got home late a few days later, after sitting in the Milwaukee airport for four hours because of weather delays. Logan was exhausted and looking forward to going right to bed, but when he pulled up to the house he shared with Ryder, he was surprised to see Cassie’s green Jeep in their driveway. Ryder hadn’t arrived yet, so he got out, grabbed his bag, and went inside.
“Hey.” Cassie looked up from a book with a smile.
“Hey. What’s going on?”
“Coco got out again tonight and since you guys were on a plane, Missy called me.”
“Oh, wow, I’m sorry about that. I’m sure Ryder will pay you for your time or—”
She waved a hand as she got to her feet. “Nah, it’s all good. Coco and I are buddies now, and she’s truly sweet. Missy’s just not very strong and Coco gets away from her, which scares both of them, and then Missy panics and Coco runs around like a lunatic.”
“Hey.” Ryder came bursting through the door. “Is everything okay?”
Cassie nodded. “Don’t worry. Coco’s all curled up—” She was interrupted by Coco barreling across the room, trying to stop before she got to Ryder, and skidding across the floor instead, taking out two chairs in the process.
“Easy, girl.” Ryder laughed as he bent to pet her. “I’m right here. Yes, I know you’re excited I’m home. Come on, settle down.”
Coco danced in a circle, pausing for a moment to jump up on Ryder and then racing around the house again for a few seconds.
“Hey, let me pay you for helping out,” Ryder began, pulling out his wallet.
She shook her head. “No, really, it was no problem. She’s a good dog, and Missy’s a good kid, too. She tries so hard, but she just can’t handle Coco physically.”
“I was afraid of that,” Ryder said, “but with Sara pregnant, I’m trying not to bother her as much, and now I have to find another place to board Coco. The last place closed, and then Sara was helping out, but I’m in a bind until I find somewhere I trust.”
“Call me any time,” Cassie said, pulling out her keys. “I’m busy with hockey and work, but if I’m around, I’m happy to help.”
“Thanks again.”
“Good night.” She smiled and waved as she walked out through the garage.
“All right, bedtime.” Ryder whistled, and Coco followed him back to her crate.
“Good thing Cassie was around to help,” Logan said, following him.
“I wish she’d let me pay her,” Ryder said, putting Coco in her crate and closing it.
“She’s a good friend,” Logan said.
“We’ll have to do something nice for her.”
“Why don’t we get a big group of guys to go up to the club next time we’re off and spend a bunch of money on her? Then it’ll be like we paid her for taking care of Coco, but in a roundabout way.”
“You don’t think she’ll be mad that we bring a bunch of guys?” Ryder asked, frowning. “I mean, she asked us to keep it on the down low that she works there.”
“She’ll be wearing her wig, and we won’t tell anyone anything except that we want to go out. When we get there, I’ll make sure she knows only you, I, and possibly Vik are aware of Nympho’s identity.”
“Yeah, that’ll work. Okay, sounds like a plan. Now, I need to shower and crash.”
“You and me both.”
Logan checked the team’s schedule and figured the following Friday night would be the best time to get a bunch of guys to go out. They had back-to-back games on Saturday and Sunday, so Friday would be an ideal time to party. Most of the older guys said no, but a group of six of them were scheduled to go and he was looking forward to seeing Cassie dance again. Maybe a little too much.
No matter how many times he reminded himself they were just friends and absolutely weren’t going to sleep together, he still thought about it. Of course, he thought about sex all the time and he’d been in a bit of a dry spell lately, so he probably just needed to get laid. The opportunity was always there, but his interest waned sometimes, and he never knew why.
“What time are we meeting up?” Ryder asked him at practice on Friday morning.
“We’re having dinner at Gil’s at seven,” he said, referring to a steakhouse they all loved. “And then we’ll head up to the club about nine or ten.”
“You driving?”
Logan nodded. They alternated having a designated driver when they went out like this, and Logan had volunteered this time since he didn’t need to get drunk to appreciate Cassie when she was dancing. Also, the drunker the other guys were, the less chance there was they would recognize her.
“I thought you guys usually hi
t the strip clubs on the road?” Sergei Petrov, one of the alternate captains on the team, asked them as he put on his gear.
“We have a new favorite here in town,” Ryder said, chuckling. “I think Logan’s got a crush on her.”
Logan elbowed him. “She’s amazing on stage, that’s all. I don’t have a crush on anyone. You know me better than that.”
Sergei laughed. “That’s what we all say until—boom! Love smacks you right between the eyes.”
Logan grimaced. “Dude. There is no love in my future. Not for at least five or ten more years. You were, what, thirty-three when you met Dani?” Dani was his wife.
“Thirty-two, I think, but remember, I’d been married before. My first wife died, so it’s not like it took me that long to fall in love.”
“I’m only twenty-three,” Logan said. “I mean, it would be cool if it happened, but I don’t see it. Not now anyway.”
“I would like this very much,” Vik said in his halting English. “I do not like the alone.”
“And you haven’t met anyone you like?” Ryder asked him.
Vik shrugged. “I cannot explain. Maybe I am too…” He muttered something in Russian, and Sergei laughed.
“He thinks he’s too picky.”
“But we should be picky,” Logan protested, frowning. “Shouldn’t we?”
Sergei nodded. “Absolutely. You’re not supposed to settle. This is your life, the person you’ll hopefully be with forever. She has to be amazing. Special. Someone who makes you feel whole, even when shit hits the fan. And it will. No matter how good your life is, there will be periods where it’s shit.”
“I was engaged,” Jude said, joining the conversation. “Before I came to Alaska. And the whole time there was something in the back of my mind but I couldn’t put my finger on it. So instead of driving myself crazy, I went to her, and told her.”
“You told her you were having doubts?” Ryder asked incredulously.
“Yup. Well, I told her it felt like we hadn’t been connecting lately and asked if she felt it too. And funny, she seemed so relieved when I brought it up because she’d been feeling it, too. Once we talked it out, we realized we really liked each other, but that maybe forever wasn’t the right thing for us.”
“So you ended it?”
“Yup. Three days later, I got traded to Alaska. And get this—she said it was a good thing because she didn’t want to move to Anchorage.”
“Huh.” Ryder nodded. “Well, I guess it’s good it worked out.”
“Damn straight,” Jude said. “Divorce is expensive.”
“Tell me about it.” Team captain, Jake Carruthers, shook his head. “My divorce cost me a fortune.”
“I thought you just got married like a year ago?” Jude asked.
“Second marriage.”
Some of the guys started talking about marriage and divorce, and Logan tuned them out. His buddies were great guys, and he liked their wives and girlfriends, too, but that level of commitment scared him. How did you know if someone you were sleeping with and having fun with was the person you wanted to spend your life with? His parents had divorced when he was five, and though it had been amicable and they were both in his life, they’d both also married and divorced again. His father had married his third wife just a year ago, and she was only five years older than Logan. His mom had sworn off men for a while, but she had a boyfriend now, too, and it was hard to keep up with sometimes.
“You gonna come out with us?” Ryder was asking Sergei.
Sergei shook his head. “Nah. We’ve got two kids at home, and both of us work full-time and travel a lot. When we’re home, we want to be together.”
“Does it get boring?” Logan asked curiously. “I mean, Dani’s great. I’m sure you have fun together and all that, but now that there’s kids and sports and homework and diaper changing…does it get boring?”
“Sometimes it gets frustrating,” Sergei said, leaning against the wall. “But that’s not the same thing. And even if it did, I still wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. The love you have for your spouse is amazing, but it’s really hard to explain what you feel when you’re a dad. This little person depends on you for everything—and loves you unconditionally—so even when the day has been hell and I’m tired and grumpy, how could I ever take it out on Niko or Max? On top of that, I have this amazing woman at my side. Do we argue or disagree or get on each other’s nerves sometimes? Sure. But in general? There is no one I’d rather spend my life with, whether it’s good, bad, or ugly. Also, there’s no such thing as boring when you’re a professional hockey player living the dream. The days when there’s nothing to do but hang out with my family? That’s a welcome change from the constant high of playing at the level we play.”
Several of the guys nodded, chiming in with their own stories.
Logan couldn’t quite wrap his head around it, though. He was having far too much fun to be stuck at home with a wife and a bunch of kids. Just the thought made him shudder.
7
Cassie’s team lost Friday night, so she was in a foul mood when she got to the club. Her mood got even worse when she spotted Bob in the crowd, so she immediately went to find the manager, Tony.
“Tony, what’s Bob doing here?” she demanded.
“He’s family and he spends money,” Tony replied, shrugging. “But security knows not to let him near the stage. And when you’re on the floor, they’ll keep an eye on him.”
“I’m not serving him.”
Tony glanced up. “You’re a big draw here, Nympho, but sometimes you have to try to be a team player.”
Cassie pursed her lips. “My name is Cassidy, and no, I don’t. I told you my parameters when I started. If you don’t want me here, I can go to the Crazy Horse.”
He looked up, his brow furrowed with annoyance. “Don’t burn bridges, Cassidy.” The way he accented her name held an unspoken threat, and Cassie would have done anything just then to tell him to go fuck himself and walk out. Since she couldn’t, she merely lifted her chin.
“I’m not burning anything, but we had an agreement, and after working those awful day shifts for you last week, I’d think you’d be a little nicer to me. Especially since everyone comes to see me on Saturday nights.” She turned and walked out, frustration seeping through her. She was so tired of this. Two years felt like two decades, and the time when she could quit seemed really far away. Maybe she could get a smaller apartment, with two roommates instead of one, and just go back to waiting tables at a restaurant.
She hated being broke, though. After her first divorce, she’d had to leave with nothing more than the clothes on her back and a backpack of a few more things. Her ex had kept everything, and she didn’t have the money to hire a lawyer to fight him in court. She’d just wanted out at that point, after finding him dealing drugs on a street corner, so she’d left and had to start over.
That led her to marrying husband number two. She’d been broke, tired, and on the rebound, and lonely enough to be blind to how wrong they were for each other. Her first marriage lasted a year; the second only nine months. Thank god there hadn’t been any children from either relationship.
She’d been divorced and single for two years now, and mostly enjoyed her life. The only thing she missed about being married was the regular sex. She hadn’t had sex in months because the only guys she met were either creeps from the club or the guys on the Blizzard, and since she wasn’t interested in a relationship, she wasn’t going there. Not when she was friends with the WAGs and even some of the guys, too. Meeting men was hard when you were busy, and she was definitely busy.
Sitting at her dressing table in the back, she pulled on her wig and stared in the mirror for a few seconds. She looked younger with her naturally blond hair, but as soon as she added the wig and all the heavy makeup, it made her look older. More than anything else, she looked tired. Not in the traditional sense since she didn’t have dark circles under her eyes or wrinkles, but her eyes were haunted
. As if really bad things had happened to her and she was tired of everything. It wasn’t necessarily true, but sometimes it looked that way.
She didn’t always look like this, but tonight it seemed a stark reminder as she stared in the mirror.
“You okay?” Layne asked, peering at her curiously.
“I’m good.” She smiled over at her friend. “Just thinking.”
“You do way too much of that. You should be more like me and never think about anything serious ever. Especially not at work.”
“What makes you think I was thinking about something serious?” Cassie asked, laughing.
“’Cause I know you, and that’s what you do. That’s why you’re in school and doing all the book learning.” Layne got to her feet and fluffed her hair. “I dropped out of high school at seventeen, and while I kind of regret it, I’m doing okay. And frankly, you’re always so stressed out, I’m kind of glad I never put that kind of pressure on myself.” She leaned over and kissed Cassie’s cheek. “Now wish me luck.”
“Break a leg,” Cassie called after her.
She would be dancing after Layne, so she really did need to stop thinking so much. With Bob in the audience, she had to be extra diligent tonight, and it was hard to have fun that way, but she had to try or this would become drudgery.
It was packed tonight, too. More so than usual, and the girls were all making a ton of money and Cassie had been raking it in just serving drinks. She’d gone on break after seeing Bob, but now she was gearing up for her own midnight dance and needed to get in the right mindset.
Her routine set to “Umbrella” was one of the most popular, especially on a Friday night, so that would hopefully bring in the big bucks for the night, and she’d come up with something else for tomorrow’s show.
