Julian walked over to her slowly. Each step was calculated. Every movement controlled. It only made Madi feel even worse. She was the one who needed to get back some control.
“We’ll figure this out,” he said. “But first, let’s tackle what we can.” He tried on a grin. It was weirdly reassuring. “I’m sure I’m not the only one who needs to eat something. Come with me to the kitchen?”
Julian held out his elbow. Madi wiped at her tears, then took it. His skin was warm against hers. A Band-Aid to hold closed the wound. His presence was something Madi had longed for ever since he left. Even before she’d found out she was pregnant.
There was something about the man that calmed her. Yet at the same time, excited her beyond reason.
Why had she turned him away?
Madi felt the heat of shame slither up her neck.
She knew why.
It was the same reason she’d never had a long-term relationship in her thirty years of life. The same reason her friendships were limited to Jenna and few others. The same reason she wanted to deal in a profession that brought in strangers who left as strangers.
The same reason she was terrified of being a mother.
Madi hadn’t just been hurt as a child, she’d been broken. Some of those pieces that had been shattered would never be put back together again. She didn’t want them to be.
You can’t do everything, so just focus on the one thing you can.
Michael Nash had said that countless times but it was only now, walking arm in arm with the father of her child, through the inn that was her home, that Madi finally realized she’d taken the advice further than she’d realized.
Instead of moving on from her fear, she’d just removed herself from the world as best she could.
Yet somehow, fear had found her again.
This time, it brought death, too.
Chapter Eight
Nathan Wilson was staying in a hotel in Kilwin. Ray had opted to stay at the Wild Iris Retreat on the ranch until the next day. Jenna had also had a long night before and would wait until further notice to come in. As for the Nash brothers? Julian didn’t know yet.
Which left him sitting across from Madi, eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in silence.
She had her feet up on a chair in the eat-in part of the kitchen, gaze firmly out the window. It looked into the backyard, but in the waning light after dusk, the view was slowly being snuffed out. The change sent shadows that dulled the strands of gold splayed out across her back. For once they weren’t braided. Another change in a long list of differences between this visit and his last.
Julian prided himself on noticing details. The little things. The small movements. The subtle shifts. It had been his bread and butter in his military career, helping him better the world by understanding it just a bit more than most.
Right now that skill was telling him three things, just as it had the first time he’d seen Madi months ago.
One, Madi was uncomfortable and not just in the emotional sense. Every few minutes she would readjust. The briefest flash of annoyance would move across her expression. She’d stroke her stomach and then settle again. Only to do it all over again. Julian couldn’t deny every time it happened his concern went from normal to all-out alert. He came from a small family. Loving parents and a sister, Bethany, only one year younger than him. He’d never had the chance to be around someone pregnant before. Certainly not six months along and wrapped up in a murder investigation. He didn’t know what was normal in either situation, never mind combined.
Two, something had changed between their walk from Madi’s room to the kitchen. Julian had felt it through their touch and then seen it in her face. Or, really, hadn’t seen it. Madi had gone from a rush of emotions to closed off. First she’d been angry at the senseless act of violence, then she had cried. Even now Julian could feel the need to comfort her pulsing through him. The tears that had traveled down her beautiful tanned skin had only reminded him that as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t protect her from everything. That included whatever had prompted her to surround herself with the invisible walls that were keeping him out. Julian couldn’t blame her for her caution, but that didn’t mean he had to like the idea that she had retreated away from him. Again.
And the third thing he knew without a doubt was that, despite the time that had passed since they’d seen each other, he still found her impossibly beautiful. Exhaustion? Stress? Worry? They might have changed the way she was holding herself but they hadn’t changed the way Julian marveled at her. There was an effortless way about her beauty. It drew him in months ago, just as it beckoned to him now. Julian wanted to reach across the small table and tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear. To look into those sky blue eyes before pressing his lips to hers. Before he could police those thoughts, parts of him started to wake up in excitement. Memories of doing that, and more, started to flood back in.
It wasn’t like the first day he’d met her all over again, wondering what she felt like. Tasted like.
Those were questions that had turned into memories and he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to revisit those moments.
Even after the fact that she had kept something from him. Rather, someone. A daughter.
Which would make him a father.
Julian prided himself on understanding and recognizing the small things in life. The details that made up every day. Yet, when he thought about his future before he’d met Madi? Before he’d found out he was going to be a father?
Well, he’d imagined thousands of little details that his future might be made up of and having a daughter hadn’t been one of those details. At least, not like this.
He wanted the job with Chance to be the start of growing roots, of staying still. Eventually he knew that would turn into his own family. A wife. Children.
But now the details he’d imagined of his future were different. Not only had he found Madi after months of being apart, he’d found more questions than answers surrounding her.
Did she expect him to leave again?
Did she want him to?
Did she regret that he was the father?
Sitting across from the golden-haired innkeeper as she stroked her pregnant stomach, Julian found that despite the questions he had there was one answer that was clear.
He would love and protect his daughter for the rest of his life.
No matter what.
The realization rocked through him in such a profound way he nearly said it out loud.
Madi, unaware of his influx of paternal love, shifted in her chair again. She winced, took the last bite of her sandwich, and then stroked her stomach again. This time she kept her hand resting there.
Julian also realized he wasn’t the only one trying to protect someone.
He opened his mouth to speak, but Madi beat him to it.
“I don’t share this story a lot, or really at all, but everyone in town knows it.” Her gaze swung to his. “It’s only fair I catch you up.”
Madi let out an unmistakably defeated breath.
“Okay,” he said. “I’m listening.”
For a moment Julian didn’t think she’d continue, but then she looked out of the window again and did just that.
“When Desmond, Caleb and I were eight we sneaked out to a local park. We were bored and you know how mob mentality works? Well, that was us when we were together. Triplet terrors.” She smiled. It was brief. “The park was really just trails in the woods with a picnic area thrown in the middle. Nothing too fancy but, for us, it was a fun place to play. That day, we decided to play hide-and-seek. Des and I went to go hide while Caleb counted... For the life of me, to this day, I can’t remember what I first thought when I saw the man. I just remember screaming.”
Julian’s hands fisted beneath the table. It was hard to hold his anger in. It wouldn’t help eight-year-old
Madi or her siblings now.
“He grabbed me before I could run. When Des and Caleb showed up he had a gun on me and told us that we were coming with him. All three of us.” She shook her head. “My dad was a detective at the sheriff’s department, before that a deputy for years, just like his dad. He’d made sure that all of us knew that there were bad people in the world and if those bad people ever tried to take any of us anywhere to fight like hell.”
“Chances of survival go down tremendously once a person gets into a car while being kidnapped,” he stated, already knowing the statistic. Madi nodded.
“As soon as he said the words, that was all I could hear,” she continued. “Dad just telling us over and over again to fight. To escape. To not be taken even if there was a risk we’d get hurt. So I did what I could.” She fisted her hand but didn’t mimic any movement. “Caleb called it a throat punch but I just hit the first thing I could with how he held me. I didn’t even realize it was his throat until he let me go. But it wasn’t enough.” Madi turned her head. She ran a finger across the scar on her cheekbone. “He pistol-whipped me. And that’s all she wrote on my end. It knocked me out cold and left a constant reminder.”
Julian swore. There was no way he could hide his disgust for a man who would hit a child. Madi waited until he was done to continue. She didn’t turn toward the window again but her eyes were averted. Julian recognized the past glazing over them as she replayed what had happened for him.
“Apparently this incensed the boys. The man shot at them to keep them away as he tried to get his bearings back. A bullet grazed Caleb’s arm pretty deep, blood went everywhere, or so I’m told. That only revved Desmond up even more. He managed to jump on the man. That didn’t work out, either. He was thrown to the ground, where the man then stomped on Des’s leg and broke it. And just like that, he was three for three. He took me to the car and the boys followed, Caleb dragging Des along, both bloody and broken. They didn’t want to leave me.” Madi paused, collecting herself. Julian realized his adrenaline was surging, building along with his rage at their attacker. She cleared her throat after a moment and finished the story. “He used the threat of hurting me to get the boys to comply with being blindfolded and to behave as he took us to a cabin out in the woods near the town limits. He locked us in the basement apartment. Three beds, a bathroom and no earthly idea as to the why of it all. He held us for three days.”
Julian shook his head.
“Who the hell would do that?” He seethed. “You were children.”
Madi let out a long breath.
“The man only ever spoke to us to threaten us to behave. He’d bring us food, tell us he’d hurt Desmond even more if we tried to escape, and then would leave. So we listened... Until we didn’t.”
Julian had thought the end of the story was nearing before but now he could read the ramp up to the climax in Madi’s expression. Memories bled through people’s guarded walls sometimes, even if they didn’t want them to. Madi couldn’t hide the anger, anguish and defiance that flashed across her face in quick succession as she spoke again.
“Des was in so much pain, even before we got into that basement. The man knew it and so we used that against him. Caleb and I yelled that Des had stopped breathing while Des tried his best to pretend. I can still remember how hard I cried, yelling out for him. Caleb at my side doing the same. One minute we were trying to fool the man, in the next I believed our lie. It helped us sell it. The second the man bent over Des to check on him, Caleb and I attacked. Then Des joined in. We worked like a unit, one mind between three little bodies, but it worked.” She let out another, smaller breath. Relief, even though it was an old one, flitted over her causing some of the tension she’d been holding in her body to visibly lessen. In turn Julian felt himself calm down a little.
“We managed to lock him in the same place he’d locked us up before escaping into the woods,” she continued. “A Good Samaritan found us and took us to the department.”
“And the man?”
“Gone by the time Caleb led them back to the cabin. No clues. No leads to follow. My father tried his hardest to find him, even sacrificing his health through the years to do so. He passed away without uncovering anything.”
“But he thought Detective Miller was involved?”
Julian had already disliked the man. That had only intensified hundredfold. Madi nodded.
“I never knew all the details,” she said with regret. “Dad tried his hardest to keep us out of it, but whatever he found made him look at Miller. Eventually he stopped the accusations but you could tell he was still bothered by it.” She took another deep breath. Her baby blues met his stare. “Which is the point of this story. The Nash triplet abduction is one of the most famous cases in Overlook history. The story of what happened has changed hands so many times that I’ve even been told about it with a few details completely wrong. It’s like an urban legend here now...but before it evolved, it was a real, living and breathing mystery that ate at the town. When my dad started investigating Miller, it didn’t matter that Dad didn’t have evidence—it ate Miller up, too. His marriage ended, he left the department, left town and was only hired at the Kilwin Police Department after Dad passed. Whether or not he had anything to do with what happened—it didn’t matter. The damage was more than done.”
Her expression softened.
“Which is why I have to warn you about being with me. Being around me,” she amended. “Our last name carries a lot of weight in this town, most of it good, but when it comes to Christian Miller? I’m sure he already has a cell with my name on it that he’ll do anything to fill. I don’t want you to get caught in his cross fire.”
Relief, more powerful this time, seemed to deflate her rigidness. That was it. That was the end of her speech. There was still tension there but Madi appeared to have said her piece.
Julian understood why the woman had walls now...and she was giving him an out while she stayed behind them. Pain, trauma. They changed everything. A stone in the water with ripples moving out and touching every part of your life, even those around you.
Julian had seen pain. He understood trauma. He could empathize with how both affected a person and why Madi might need those invisible walls more than he needed to knock them down.
What he didn’t understand was why Madi hadn’t discussed her swollen belly or his daughter now or at any time in the last several months. A child was a game changer. One that didn’t just affect Madi.
A daughter. His daughter.
With a start, sitting there in the kitchen, darkness creeping through the windows splaying shadows across the face of a beautiful woman, Julian realized he felt those words again. The meaning.
Pure, unyielding love slammed into Julian’s chest like a Mack truck. No matter what happened between him and Madi, he knew, without a doubt, that he would be there for his child.
Sitting to his full height, he made sure to keep Madi’s eye as he asked the question he’d been waiting to ask.
“Were you ever going to tell me about our daughter?”
To her credit, Madi didn’t skip a beat. Her jaw hardened.
“I tried,” she said, words clipped.
They also hit hard.
“You tried? How—” Julian cut himself off by swearing. One moment he was feeling a love unlike any he’d ever felt before, the next it was loathing. “I had to get a new number when I switched phones right before deployment. Which means the number I gave you was useless,” She nodded. It was also a clipped movement. “And I didn’t give you the new number,” he finished.
She nodded again.
He felt like an idiot.
“It was hectic right before I left,” he continued, knowing it was a lame excuse. He reached out for her hand just as she backed her chair up and stood. Still he finished the thought. “I should have called. I’m sorry.”
Madi shoo
k her head. Her expression had gone impassive again. The walls were up and reinforced.
“Why would you call me with a new number?” she asked, though it was rhetorical. “I’m the one who said we should go our separate ways. It’s fine, really. I’m fine. This—” she motioned to her stomach “—was a surprise. One we’re going to have to talk about at length, but...well...can that talk be tomorrow?” She smiled. It didn’t reach her eyes. “If we don’t get this inn under control, how am I supposed to get anything else under control?”
Before Julian could respond, her demeanor shifted.
“I mean, unless you want out of all of this? I know it’s a lot of madness.”
It was Julian’s turn to stand. He made sure to keep eye contact this time, too.
“We can talk tomorrow,” he said. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter Nine
The air had been cleared between Madi and Julian, at least somewhat. They were going to talk about the future in the future, and until then he was staying. Madi tried to keep the flutter of excitement in her stomach under control but the feeling lasted right up to Loraine and Nathan’s room.
Julian whistled.
“It looks like a tornado tore through here.”
Madi had to agree.
The guest suite was smaller than her personal one and, as a result, had only the necessary pieces of furniture. Those very same pieces had been either moved, flipped or otherwise disrupted. The desk chair was on its side, the dresser had a few of its drawers on the ground, the mattress had been mostly pulled off the bed and several towels had been thrown around the room.
“Looks like Nathan took some of his anger out in here,” Julian said, not moving from the doorway.
Madi sighed.
“In his defense, he thinks I killed his wife.” She went to the closest towel and tried to pick it up. It was like navigating around a yoga ball. A warm hand went to the small of her back right before Julian bent down and grabbed it instead. The contact was surprising. It made quelling the flutter in her chest even harder.
Credible Alibi Page 7
