by Mary Smith
“Dad,” Leia looked him right in the eyes, “I give you my word.”
He knew Leia never lied. He and Chloe raised their girls to be honest. Of course, the little lies happened but never anything major.
“Leia, I’m telling you right now, you get one penalty and that’s it.” He reaffirmed.
“I one hundred percent promise.”
“Chloe, anything to add?” Cabel didn’t want to leave her out.
“Not right now, but Cabel, we’ll need to register her with the county school board.”
He nodded. “We’ll go first thing.”
“Can I move in tonight?” Leia slightly begged.
“You can take a few things tonight. You have plenty at my house to do.”
Leia jumped from her chair, rushed over to Cabel and hugged his neck tightly. “Thank you, Dad. I won’t let you down.”
Cabel knew she wouldn’t.
Chapter Four
Caryn changed into a pair of leggings and a tank top. Opening her refrigerator, she realized she needed to go shopping but didn’t feel like it. Grabbing her phone, she ordered a pizza and decided to stretch out on the couch. She told her clients everyone needed time to unwind every once in a while, and she took that advice.
Pouring a glass of Diet Coke and finding a comfortable spot on the couch, she turned on Netflix. Caryn flipped through the documentary section and found one about a murderer who had been wrongly convicted. Certainly, no one knew of her love of these documentaries and docuseries. People would think of her differently knowing she watched such twisted things.
As she watched, her thoughts began to drift to Cabel but decided to text Maxima instead.
Caryn: How’s your evening?
Maxima: Okay. We’re still in a hotel but meeting a realtor tomorrow. How are you?
It seemed to be a loaded question to Caryn at the moment.
Caryn: Confused.
Maxima: Cabel or Oliver?
She looked away from the screen and wondered which. No, she knew.
Caryn: Cabel.
Maxima: What’s going on?
Caryn: Really, nothing. I texted him earlier, but I hoped he would’ve come over tonight.
Maxima: Did you ask him to come?
Caryn: No, I just wanted him to.
Just as she sent the message, she knew it sounded childish.
Maxima: Just ask him over. He’ll come.
She knew he would, but she didn’t want to seem desperate. When the doorbell rang, her heart leaped thinking fate sent him to her anyway, but it was only the pizza delivery person standing on the other side of the door.
Setting the pizza on the table, she didn’t bother getting a plate. Picking up a slice, she took a large bite. As she chewed, a smile grew across her face thinking of her and Cabel’s first date.
He had texted her and she truly couldn’t resist him. They had texted over an hour that first night before he asked her out. For their date, Caryn changed at least ten times before settling on black slacks and a simple purple capped sleeve blouse. Had she’d known how the night would have ended, she’d pick something different.
Cabel showed up in a suit, very gentlemanly and deliciously handsome. She impressively didn’t stutter, stammer, or forget her own name during their conversations of the evening. She didn’t want the night to end and made a suggestion about walking in the park.
The rain came out of nowhere, and they raced back to Cabel’s Hummer but not before he pulled her to a stop. She didn’t understand what he was doing until his lips were on hers. Shock hit her first, but then she relaxed into him. She never thought she’d be kissing a man—albeit a gorgeous man—in the rain as if they were in some 1950s black and white movie.
It had been the best kiss she ever had.
After her second slice of pizza, she picked up her phone again and tapped Cabel’s name.
“Hello,” he answered after a couple of rings.
“Hey, how’s your evening?” She found a comfortable spot and got ready to enjoy their conversation.
“Actually, my day has been weird.”
“Really? Why weird?” She expected many other adjectives, just not weird.
“I told you I was going to Chloe’s house to work out Leia’s situation?”
“Yes.”
“Well, Leia has enrolled in a virtual high school and moved in with me.”
Caryn’s mouth dropped. “What?”
“Yep, we all figured it would be for the best.” He went into the details about what happened when he went over there.
“You’re an excellent father.” She knew it meant a lot to him for her to say it. However, she felt he didn’t need her words of encouragement. He put his children above everyone, and Caryn found it sexy.
“Thank you. Want to go to dinner tomorrow night? Probably will be the last opportunity since the season is about to start.” Cabel rushed out.
His question and words made her smile. Just as she was to answer he said, “If Oliver doesn’t have anything planned for you.”
She closed her eyes from the pain in his tone. “Cabel.” She choked on his name from emotion. “I told you our relationship isn’t what you think.”
“Well, the team is talking about you two.”
Opening her eyes, she began to realize something. “Is this why you keep us a secret?”
He scoffed. “I have never kept you a secret. I prefer to keep my private life…private. And I should say the same for you.”
She sat up. “The people who matter to me know who you are to me.”
“And who am I? After almost ten months, please tell me who I am to you?”
For the first time, she heard hurt and anger from Cabel. He’d always been a nice guy, never questioning the dynamics of their relationship or asking for titles. “You are someone who means a lot to me. These past months have been the best of my life.”
“But I’m just a friend, right?”
“You are my friend and more.” Caryn knew he wanted more from her—sexually and emotionally—but at thirty-two years old, she knew not to rush. She had done that before, and it left her emotionally broken and drained. Cabel’s relationship with her had felt much different, much more intimate without sex, and she didn’t want to ruin it.
“How about you come over here for dinner?” She suggested. Her heart couldn’t bear him going through turmoil because of her.
“Sure.” He gave in. “Seven?”
“Yes, I’ll see you then. Goodnight, Cabel.”
“Night.” He ended the call.
Caryn stared at her phone screen for a few seconds. She knew her life had changed since the death of her mother. Rising up from the comfortable couch, she headed toward her home office. She briefly stopped in the hallway, glancing at her favorite pictures.
Her mother’s red hair shined in every photo but not as much as her smile. Even her last photo. Her bald head hidden underneath a white scarf. Her frail body engulfed by the large hospital bed. A tear escaped Caryn’s eye without her knowing.
She touched the frame and continued to her office. Opening the storage closet, she reached up and pulled down a small box. She shouldn’t feel as intense as she does every time she touched the box, but she did. Lifting the lid, her mother’s perfume tickled her nose and brought a smile to Caryn’s face. On the top, written in her mother’s perfect handwriting was the letter that changed her life. She didn’t need to open it to know the words on the paper. She’d read them a thousand times since the first day she opened it.
While growing up, she had asked many questions about her father, but her mother dodged them for years and years. Caryn even tried to figure it out on her own, but her mother kept secrets better than the CIA. When her mother was diagnosed with cancer, Caryn’s worse fear became reality. Even though her mother lost her smile, she watched this strong, independent woman grow frail and had to rely on others for help.
Caryn shut the box and strolled over to the office chair. Sitting down she
put her head in her hands. A million times she wished for her mother’s wisdom to rain down and help her through this situation. She would’ve had told her exactly what to do with Oliver and Cabel. Just thinking of her mother made her feel better because she knew exactly what she would have said.
Tell Cabel the truth.
Caryn knew Cabel loved the lasagna she made last time, but she wouldn’t have a whole lot of time between work and home to prep. She quickly scrolled through Tasty—her go-to site for recipes—and found one for lemon parmesan orzo. Simple, easy, fast, and delicious were the combinations she tried to find, and it came through. Caryn wrote out a grocery list for her dinner plans tonight.
Knock. Knock. “Caryn?”
“Yes.” She looked up from her list to see Toni standing there.
“Oliver Matthews is here.”
Nodding, she waved her hand motioning him to come in. The lump in her throat prevented the words from coming out. Sleep had evaded her the majority of last night because of everything weighing on her mind. She wanted Cabel. She wanted the relationship with Oliver to thrive, but she had to be truthful with everyone. She didn’t openly lie, but she never corrected the information with Cabel.
“Hello, Caryn.” Oliver beamed as he walked into the room.
Caryn admired the way he seemed to be a ‘take-charge’ Alpha male, but with her, not so much, even though he still owned the room when he came into it.
Embracing him she inhaled his spicy aftershave. Hugging him brought a flutter to her insides. “Thank you for coming.” She made herself pull away. Holding onto him any longer might have been awkward.
“Of course. I’ve told you, anytime you need me, I’ll be there for you.” Oliver smiled.
“Let’s sit.” She made her way to the couch. Normally, she sat in the chair, but Oliver wasn’t a patient.
Unbuttoning his suit jacket, he took a seat at the end of the couch. Caryn sat right next to him, turning her body to him. She needed to look him in the eye.
“I’m not sure where to begin.” Suddenly, her nerves began to shake.
Covering her hand with his large one, he gave it a loving squeeze. “Take your time and just say it.”
He’s right. “I’ve never had trouble expressing myself.” She began her confession.
“I believe it.” He chuckled.
“I miss my mother.” Her voice cracked.
“I know you do.” Oliver squeezed her hand again.
“I have a million and one questions to ask her, but if she were standing here right now, I’d just want to hug her.” Swallowing down another lump in her throat, she willed herself not to cry.
“I’d give up everything to give you your mother.” Oliver’s boisterous tone saddened.
“I know.” She gave him an encouraging smile. “We need to talk about us.”
“Okay. What would you like to talk about?”
“I’ve never been one to run away from my feelings or not really trust someone—”
“Do you not trust me?” he asked cutting off her thought.
“Oliver, please. Let me get this out and then we’ll discuss it further,” she stated with a firm tone.
“I’m sorry. Go ahead.”
She didn’t believe his apology but felt his sincerity. “When my mother died a very large part of me went with her. It had been her and me for my entire life. Now, I have more people in my life, and it’s becoming complicated.
“Are you kicking me out of your life?”
Caryn gave him a look of derision. “That would be impossible, don’t you think?”
“Then you must be talking about Cabel.” He deduced. “Are you going to break it off with him?”
Shaking her head, she sighed. “He and I have never sat down and actually discussed the dynamics of our relationship.”
“Really?” He genuinely appeared shocked. “Caryn, since the day we met you had a PowerPoint of our dynamics.”
Giggling, her cheeks flushed.
“Why not him? You have been seeing each other for months.”
He has asked the million dollar question, and she still couldn’t put it into words.
“He’s one of the greatest men I’ve met. He’s thoughtful, caring, funny.” She stopped, even though she could’ve gone on and on.
“Then what’s the problem.”
Caryn looked him straight in the eye and said, “Me.”
Chapter Five
As Cabel finished his shower after another hard practice, he couldn’t believe another season opener had come upon him.
This would mark his nineteenth PHL season opener. At the age of thirty-eight, he was the oldest player in the league. A title he didn’t know he wanted. He knew the word retirement loomed over his head like a large storm cloud. His body felt it coming as well. Cabel had been on the top line the majority of his career, but now he was on the fourth line. He didn’t feel ashamed, just felt…old. Hell, there were players on the Nashua Tigers, the minor league team, he could have fathered because they’re so young.
But he loved the game, loved his teammates, loved his life.
“Cabel, in my office.” Oliver’s voice boomed, echoing off the walls.
The last place he wanted to be was in Oliver’s office. The conversation with Caryn weighed on his shoulders. He had been his usual Mr. Nice Guy to her in hopes more would come of it but nothing has. Sure there was kissing and making out, but she always stopped. Cabel would never, ever push her, but his feelings had grown over the last several months. Much more than when he saw her the first time. Yet she wanted nothing more than friendship. She told him many times he was different to her but how? A big brother? A buddy? It hurt him to even think of her being in the arms of another man, especially the owner of the team he played for.
Oliver waited for Cabel outside his office door. His throat became dry. Not knowing why Oliver wanted to talk to him brought him a little anxiety. He hadn’t done anything wrong, so he knew he wasn’t in trouble. However, he and Oliver hadn’t been alone in the same room since Caryn told him she had been going out to dinner with Oliver.
“Have a seat,” Oliver ordered shutting the door as he went through.
Cabel glanced at the new family picture on his desk. Janan, Nova, and Klara, Nova’s daughter. All donning New Hampshire Bears jerseys. They all had bright smiles, and it made Cabel grin seeing it.
“Are you going to retire?” Oliver never beat around the bush when he wanted to know an answer.
“Are you asking me to retire?” Cabel didn’t mean for it to sound rude, but there was a bite to his counter question.
“No. However, there’s a team who wants you.”
This caught Cabel’s attention. He might be traded. “Who?”
“Maine.”
The word made him close his eyes. He couldn’t move. His girls were settled here, and Leia needed to be close to Chloe. “Is there any option to stay?” A second ago he’d been ready to rip his throat out—well, metaphorically—and now he might have to beg for his job.
“Cabel, you’re a piece of the Bears’ puzzle, I don’t want to lose you. You go above and beyond for this team, the staff, and the fans.”
He knew by the tone of his voice that Oliver was sincere. Now, he felt like shit. Oliver had been the best owner he ever had the pleasure to play for and probably ever will.
“I don’t want to trade you, and if you want to finish your contract here, I’ll give you my word it’ll happen.”
The saying ‘kill them with kindness’ seemed to be Oliver’s mantra at the moment. And it worked. “I’d like to finish my contract here.”
“Have you made any decisions about retirement?” he asked again.
“Truthfully.” He sighed. “I’m going back and forth.”
“I understand the feeling.” He gazed out his floor to ceiling windows viewing the arena below. All the Bears’ offices were at the very top of the arena and all looked out to the ice below. “I know Nova and Janan have everything und
er control, but I can’t seem to leave yet.”
Cabel nodded, understanding what he meant.
“Will you let me know when you make a decision?”
“I will.” He went to stand, but Oliver held up his hand.
“Now we need to discuss something of a personal nature.”
His heart dropped. Caryn.
“I’m going to say my peace, and then you can say yours.” Not giving Cabel a chance to answer he continued, “Caryn’s relationship with me is something you don’t have to worry about. All I care about is how you treat her because if you hurt her in any way, I don’t care what jersey you’re wearing, I’ll put you in the ground.”
As much as he believed him, Cabel grew a bit angry. Where did he get off trying to tell him how to treat Caryn? “What is your relationship with her?”
“It’s between us.”
Cabel stood up. “Then you shouldn’t input your opinion into ours.” He turned and left Oliver sitting in his office.
Cabel’s adrenaline was still pumped as he walked into the house. He still couldn’t believe the nerve of Oliver to talk to him in such a manner about Caryn.
“Hey, Dad,” Leia called out as he shut the door.
He grinned seeing her smile and books spread out on the table. Today had been her first official day at the virtual high school. “Are you in class?”
“About to start English?” She pointed at her open laptop. “I finished calculus, which I feel I’ll never use in my life, and I had American History first thing this morning.”
Kissing the top of her head the anger faded hearing his daughter’s happiness again.
“I’m thinking of adding another class.”
“Which one?”
