“I guess we’ll need your help, then. Perhaps you’ll still play a crucial role in setting the tone for how the world is going to be, instead of putting up with how it’s always been.”
Justice isn’t satisfied. I can tell by his irritable huff. “Tha’s going to take years. I mean right now. What’s the plan for lowering the aggression before we lower the walls?”
This is good. He’s considering the idea enough to help form a plan. It’s not everything, but it’s a very big something. “You know your people better than I do. Any ideas?”
“But ye lived in Neutral Territory, where the races have to get along, more or less. How does tha work?”
My mouth pulls to the side as I think. I pick up my fork and drum a slow staccato rhythm on the table. “We don’t have a choice, and we’re all coming off the tail end of pretty awful situations. Everyone in Neutral Territory understands that their neighbor just had the crap beat out of them by life. It works because we don’t have ties to our own people anymore.” I let out a long sigh. “I’m not sure I’m being all that helpful.”
“Not really, but tha’s good to know. I didn’t realize there were any fae in Neutral Territory.”
I stare at my fork as it taps. “There aren’t, now that I don’t live there. The fae don’t believe in a punishment like that. Not as easy to slowly pick at someone if they’re banished.”
“Then how’d ye end up there?”
I squirm in my seat. “Neutral Territory was a lot safer for me than Faveda. General Klein isn’t the fatherly type. Bad luck for him he ended up with a daughter like me, I guess.” I don’t like the bitter note in my tone. It makes it seem like I feel bad about the whole situation, which isn’t something I want to carry around on my sleeve.
Justice lets out a low whistle. “You’re General Klein’s daughter? He’s a right bastard. I didn’t know he had a daughter.”
“Well, after trying to kill me again, all he’s going to have is a jail cell, thanks to your brother being amazing.” I grip the nape of my neck and rub, wishing we were talking about anything but that. “It’s nice in Neutral Territory. They don’t have the need to hide who they are. The crimes are all laid bare on the table, so there’s less pretending. It’s easier, in a way.”
“Ah. Well, tha’s much different than Faveda. Swindlers, the whole lot of them.”
I shrug, unwilling to play this game. “I think that’s the place we start—ironing out any hate speech from our rulers. Maybe sit down with Ronin, Des, Salem, King Fairbanks and Prince Alexavier.” I don’t know how to ask my next question, so I just go for it. “Your mother isn’t… She isn’t ruling anymore?”
A muscle in Justice’s jaw ticks. “No. She’s not able. Would ye like to meet her?”
“Really?” My spine straightens against the hard back of my seat.
“Aye. I reckon it’ll be harder for ye to tell a lie to a dying woman. But you’re fae, so I wouldn’t put it past ye.”
I stand abruptly, my shoulders rolling back. “I’m no more fae than you are. If I was a shifter coming to you with this plan, would you have this big a problem with it?”
Justice stands, making my height laughable as he comes around the side of the table to tower over me. “Probably not. But ye are what ye are. No getting around tha.”
When he walks out of the room after insulting me to my face, I follow until I hear Des’ howl of pain. “Ah! Lily, where are you?”
I spin around and bolt in the direction of Des’ voice, throwing my arms around him the second he comes into view from upstairs. “I’m sorry! I forgot about the tether. Are you okay?”
Des squinches his eyes tight and nods, though his heart is racing against mine. “I think so. Felt like a nail was drilling through my temple. I’ll go with you. Wherever it is, we’ll go together.”
I nod, my cheek pressing into the side of his neck. “Of course.”
Justice grumbles his discontent at the sight of our connection. “Let’s go, then.”
I link my littlest finger through Des’. Though he doesn’t know where I’m headed, he walks beside me anyway.
9
Mother Butcher
Lilya
Nine.
Mother Butcher
Lilya
It’s not the best impression I’d like to give when I meet Salem’s mother for the first time, but given that she’s got her eyes closed and there’s no guarantee she can hear me, I guess things could be worse. Mrs. Butcher has gray hair, just like Salem, but hers looks earned by time, since she appears to be in her late sixties. Her hands rest motionless at her sides while her chest moves in a shallow rhythm. She’s dressed in a black velvet gown that’s every bit regal as it is a statement: this is a room for mourning, though Queen Butcher isn’t altogether passed yet.
The room is small but nice, with the standard stone walls and floors decorated with light blue tapestries and a rug lined with gold thread—simplicity married with a touch of something lovely. Incense is burning in the corner, filling the room with a sandalwood stench so thick, it’s hard to pick out notes of anything else.
Queen Butcher is laid out on a bed near the window, the sun highlighting the wrinkles around her mouth and eyes. I wonder what her plans were for her kingdom, and how she would feel about the changes that are about to take place on her soil.
I wonder if she would’ve liked me. If she could’ve gotten past the fact that I’m fae and seen how much I truly love her son, and want a brighter future for her people.
“Should I ask Salem before I talk to his mom?” I ask Des, twisting the edge of my t-shirt between my fingers as I stand in the doorway. I’m afraid to go in any further, worried I’m intruding on something sacred.
Des shrugs. “I’m sure it’s fine. What’s he going to say? Marry me but don’t meet my mum? Besides, Salem went out for a bit.”
Out. How perfectly nondescript. Maybe Des knows about Salem’s girlfriend, which is where he probably slipped off to.
Des rubs his five o’clock shadow with his left hand. “Said he was going to go check on the north border.”
Justice catches my eye, giving me a smug look that’s perfectly timed with my heart sinking.
I feel foolish, and like our team is splintering further with all the half-truths roaming about in the air. But I’m the fae, so of course it’s me who’s suspect for every little fib.
If Salem needs the space to see his girlfriend, I have to give him that. I can apologize to her later, make her see that I didn’t know he was taken. Our master plan aside, I just can’t do that to another woman, even though I’m crazy for him.
Justice follows us when we step inside, though I wish he would stop hovering. It’s like he wants to watch every move I make, while wanting to be nowhere near me. “Can I have a minute alone with her?” I ask the guys.
“No,” Justice rules, his mouth firm. He’s got his hands tucked behind his back, which makes him look regal and brimming with deep thoughts.
“You think I’m going to hurt her?” I ask, affronted. “Then why show me where she’s at? I could sneak in here any time and off her, if that’s what I wanted. Think it through, man.”
Justice frowns at me as the truth in my words rings in his ears. “Fine. But I’ll need to pat ye down before you’re alone with my mammy.”
I hold my arms out to the sides, scowling at him as he does a professional job of feeling under my arms, down my legs and the small of my back and stomach. My dagger and holster are upstairs. “Satisfied?”
Justice points to the door. “I’ll be right out here, so don’t think of pulling any fae-like trickery.”
I fight the urge to stick out my tongue at him, and wait for Des and Justice to leave the room. When I hear the door click, I exhale. “That’s better.” I limp closer, though I’m careful not to touch her or the bed. I clear my throat three times, worried I’ll say the wrong thing. Though, it’s not like she’s going to be verbal about my mistakes, so when I open my mouth, I go
for the bare truth. “I’m in love with your son.”
It feels strangely liberating to fill the air with those words. Though I don’t know much about the woman, I hope she’s the sort who feels happy knowing her child is loved.
“I’m on the fence about Justice, though. He’s not a bad guy, but he’s a bit of a judgmental prick. He cares about your people, which I guess is what counts.” I twist the hem of my shirt between two fingers. “I’m probably not who you imagined your son ending up with, so how about I promise you I’ll be respectful of your culture. I’ll be kind and stick by his side even when the world doesn’t understand us. I’m not sure if that’ll make you happy or angry, but either way, I think you did a great job raising him. He’s…” I rub my sweaty palms off on my jeans. “Salem doesn’t waste words, like I do. Like everyone does. He doesn’t waste his punches, either. He says the right thing and fights only for what he believes in. Jacoba is lucky to have him leading their army.” My mind drifts to the stack of napkins in his breast pocket. “He’s romantic, and more sensitive than people give him credit for. If I ever had a son, I’d want him to have those qualities.”
Then it dawns on me like a boulder thrown at my head that I will never have any children. Fae can’t reproduce outside their species. It’s not possible. Prince Alexavier is my husband in name only, which means I will never have a child. I reach out to brace myself on the stone wall, the chill reaching through my arm and crawling through the rest of me.
It’s silly to be this gut-punched over something I never thought to want. Meeting a man of my species wasn’t even a possibility until a couple months ago. The thought of having kids of my own isn’t something I ever entertained with any real conviction. I mean, the thought did cross my mind when Prince Alexavier and I married, but we never talked about it. That was far too soon.
And now it’s never.
“I can’t give you any grandchildren,” I confess, frustrated with myself that my tone comes across mournful over something I shouldn’t care this much about. I pry my hand from the wall and force myself to stand, to stomach this truth because that’s what it is. There is no getting around it. “You probably want some cute little crawlers, but I can’t give them to you. I’m fae, and Salem isn’t. I have a fae husband, but we’re…” It’s hard to say the words. “We’ve separated, so that’s that.” A nervous laugh bubbles out of me, and I wonder if I’ve tipped the edge into partial insanity. “I never knew my birth mother, so it’s probably just as well. I don’t know the first thing about children. I haven’t been around any since I was one, and that didn’t end so well.” I’m shaking my head. Why can’t I stop shaking my head? “It’s good. This is good. One less thing to worry about.” I hate the pathetic false cheer in my voice, and I’m grateful she can’t really hear me, can’t see my lower lip tremble through my brave attempt at a smile.
Why am I upset about this? It’s nothing I was super passionate about before. It’s the finality of the verdict I’m having a hard time choking down.
I clear my throat again and change the subject, giving her updates on uniting the territories, and why it’s so important to me. “Salem was jumped in vampire territory for just going on a walk.”
And these hideous scars down my face are from a shifter attacking a little girl.
Of course, I don’t mention that, but I feel the sting afresh, and check over my shoulder to make sure the bear who left me alive hasn’t sneaked back in to finish the job.
I’m being ridiculous.
“They didn’t realize he was royalty, of course, but still, it’s a dark world if people can’t go strolling down certain streets. He’s brave for wanting more for his people, for putting himself out there like that. I think you would be proud of him fighting for what he believes in by using strategy and political moves rather than knives. I think he’s incredible. All three of the princes are. They concocted this thing together.”
I ramble on, my words a mix of admiration for her son and apologies for everything I am that she probably wouldn’t approve of.
It’s oddly satisfying to unburden myself of my ambitions to another woman. I miss Fiora terribly, but I don’t let myself dwell on that. Our time isn’t over.
A terrible thought strikes me across the chest. Is my time with my mother over? Fiora can’t come to Jacoba. She was banned for… reasons. Reasons she never saw fit to tell me.
“I miss my mom,” I confess to Mother Butcher. “Maybe I’m too old for that, but I can’t help it. She would know what to do, who to be. I don’t have any clue how to do this, how to be good for your people, for your son.” I touch the footboard, unsure if that’s considered disrespectful. “If it’s alright with you, I want to pretend that you’re my mom. That you want me in your family. That you have buckets of gentleness stored up just for me. This… This is hard.”
Of course, she doesn’t answer.
Before I hit the hallway, tears threaten my composure, but this is not the time. Honestly, I highly doubt it’ll ever be the time to break down. There’s a long road ahead of us, and I worry there will be nothing left of me if I dissolve into a puddle right now. But the ache in my chest grows when I think of the very real rule that my mother will never see me in the shifter mansion. She will never come to dinner here and see me in her homeland.
I wonder if I’m powerless to bring my family to me. If that’s true, I pray I can content myself with the family I’ve created, broken as we are.
10
A Lily in Nature
Destino
I can’t bring myself to speak, even as Lily falls into my arms. Correction, my arm. I can only hold her with my left, my right wrist dangling useless at my side.
I want to reassure her, but her upset is something I can’t fix. I can’t give her a child. The only one of us who can is Alex, who’s too stupid to understand the amazing gift life handed to us.
She doesn’t get misty-eyed over it. She pretends nothing at all is wrong as I hold her in the hallway, rocking us slowly from side to side. I shake my head slightly at Justice, making sure he knows we’re to let her keep her secrets she left between herself and his mum. She doesn’t know we heard every word, so I let her have her illusion of privacy.
But it kills me that she desires something I can’t give her. Something I didn’t think to ask her if she wanted. It’s a hard pill to swallow, this ramification of our decisions. I never thought much about having children, but now that possibility is gone from me, too. My bloodline will come to an end, and I’ll need to find a way to make my peace with that.
Justice opens his mouth, but I bare my fangs at him to shut him up. He’s not afraid of me, as most shifters are of vampires. He knows I would never bite him, using my teeth as weapons. But the message is delivered clear enough: Lily doesn’t need our commentary on her life. He got front row seats to her tender insides without invitation.
I love the way Lily fits in my arm, her face tucked in the crook of my neck as if we were carved from the same piece of granite and sliced apart by life and time. She belongs right here. I thumb the small bandage on her neck that covers over my bite mark. I probably shouldn’t feel some baser pride that she let me mark her. It’s brutish to indulge in fantasies of us doing that again. Though, as there isn’t blood here for me, I’m fairly certain it won’t be more than a day or so before I’m thirsty again. “Let’s go for a walk around the mansion, yeah? There’s a nice garden out back you’ll like. The sun’s about to set, but we can bring a lantern.”
“That sounds nice. We won’t be attacked?”
She asks me the question, but her eyes flick to Justice, who gives her a solemn half-bow. “I’ll speak to the guards to make sure you’re left untouched. Take your time, Miss Lily.”
“Your majesty,” I correct him, even though he’s finally making a show of being respectful. “She’s a princess twice over. That’s more clout than either of us have.”
Justice’s jaw tightens, but he doesn’t speak his displeasure. “Your
majesty.”
I keep my arm around her back and hold her hand while we walk, as if her body is as fragile as Fiora’s, and needs me to shelter her from the storm we’ve created. We leave Justice behind, moving into the early twilight the second I’m able. It’s a splendid time for me, because I can see well enough to enjoy the world without lanterns, while walking around in plain sight without fearing the sun.
The whole of Jacoba used to be far greener, but in the past few years, the land has grown brown and parched. There are rows of homes, whole neighborhoods and cities in the distance that are bustling with life, but it’s quiet on the mansion grounds, the air whistling too harshly since there are hardly any leaves on the trees to remind it to slow down.
I take Lily to the herb garden first, knowing fae are drawn to nature. “When Alex is feeling lost, he either finds his way to something green, or he makes his world greener by forcing nature’s hand.” I kiss her temple because I can’t not. “Alex actually grew this bit for Salem. He tends it every now and then. The ground here isn’t fertile enough on its own for fragile things like herbs.”
Her hands are tremulous as she kneels awkwardly in the grass, babying her injured leg, as Healer Wesley instructed. She brushes her fingers over the delicate tips of the basil leaves. “Neutral Territory is black and grey. Everything is rocky and dirty. There’s barely any nature the further in you get. A few trees, but nothing like Faveda.” She smells the leaf but doesn’t smile. Her eyes are aimed at the plant, but her gaze seems very far away, as if she’s gone somewhere entirely other in her mind.
Malicious Prince: A Reverse Harem Romance (Territorial Mates Book 3) Page 6
