by Sara York
“No, not at all.” Lafferty sat up and stretched. It had been ages since he’d fallen asleep in the beanbag, and he wasn’t sure sleeping here would be good for his back. He stood and shuffled to the bathroom. Andries’ clothes were hanging on the shower rod.
“I’ve been up for a while,” Andries called out as Lafferty shut the bathroom door.
Mornings weren’t his thing. If he was at the ranch and Daniel was around, Lafferty would be all about hopping out of bed to make pancakes or something else for the kid, but not when he was flying solo. He liked his solitude and his coffee in total quiet. He didn’t think he’d get peace with Andries here.
After he pissed and brushed his teeth, he stumbled out to his little kitchenette. Andries smiled at him, and his heart lurched.
“I just poured you some coffee.”
“Huh,” Lafferty said. “You even got it in my favorite mug.” He added cream and sugar to the coffee and stirred. The first sip made him moan. “It’s good.”
“Thanks. I didn’t do much other than press the button.”
Lafferty took another sip and then leaned against the counter, his eyes on the kid. Andries’ stare was bold and sure. This really wasn’t a kid, and he needed to stop thinking of this man as a child.
“You’re twenty for real?”
Andries nodded. This guy could have been a drug-addicted killer, but Lafferty had gambled against it. Plus, it seemed like he’d won so far.
“What are your plans?”
Andries shrugged. “For today, get my clothes dry.”
“You want to let them sit here and dry, or do you want to find a dryer?”
Again Andries shrugged. Lafferty knew pushing the kid might lead to lies, but not pushing him may lead to lies too.
“I have questions, but first, let’s eat. Do you like eggs?”
“Oh yeah. I love them.” A sad expression flitted across his face before he recovered. “My mom used to make the best scrambled eggs I’ve ever had.”
“Do you know how she made them?”
“I do. Can I attempt it?”
Lafferty flashed him an encouraging smile. Andries hopped into action, pulling out a bowl, the carton of eggs, milk, butter, and salt and pepper. He cracked six eggs and whipped them with a fork. Then he added milk and butter to the eggs while the pan heated. More butter was dropped into the pan and melted before the eggs were poured in. The sizzle of eggs as they hit the pan made Lafferty’s stomach growl.
Andries cut his gaze over then smiled. “You hungry?”
“After watching you put the food together, yes.”
“Hopefully, I got it right. Mom was a master in the kitchen.”
Lafferty had questions but hesitated and watched Andries add salt and pepper to the cooking eggs. Andries was on the streets, but he talked about his mom like he loved her. Finally, curiosity won out.
“What happened to her?”
Andries’ lips turned down, then he shrugged. “She died when I was twelve. I miss her.”
“I’m sorry. I’m sure you miss her a lot.”
Andries sad nod along with the droop of his shoulders told Lafferty a lot about the man. But Andries’ next words broke Lafferty’s heart.
“Sometimes, I pretend she’s not gone.”
“I bet it was tough growing up without her.”
“It was. Then my dad moved us to New York.”
“Where were you before?”
“In Greece. I’m a citizen here now, so I don’t need a green card or anything.”
Lafferty looked him up and down, the question flying without even thinking. “Have you been harassed by the police?”
Andries chuckled. “No man, I’m white. They don’t care if I’m homeless, as long as I’m not black or Mexican.”
“Is it really bad? I mean, I’ve seen stories, but I wasn’t sure.”
Andries stopped stirring the eggs and met his gaze, his expression serious. “Oh yeah, it’s bad.”
“So, why are you on the streets?”
Andries sighed. “It’s a long story.”
The eggs became fluffy as they cooked and looked perfect. Lafferty might just want to cook eggs like this every time he made them.
“How about after breakfast we get out of here and go walk, and if you want, you can tell me.”
“Sure.” Andries plated the eggs and set them on the table, but he kept his gaze diverted.
Lafferty remembered being homeless, not knowing who to trust. When he found someone he did trust, he had to question his sanity. He took his first bite of eggs and moaned. “These are great. Like the best I’ve ever had.”
“Thanks. I tried to replicate what my mom did to fix them.”
“Based on these eggs, I’d have to say she was an amazing cook,” Lafferty said
“She was.” Sadness cloaked Andries’ features. His fork hung in the air before he shook his head and took another bite.
They finished eating, and he washed the dishes while Andries brushed his teeth. In less than ten minutes, they were on their way headed south. He figured they’d stop and get some more coffee or maybe a pastry. They’d gone about two blocks when Andries started talking.
“When my mom died, my dad married again like six months later. The new woman wasn’t nice. She was awfully religious.”
Lafferty sucked in a breath as he looked at Andries. “Oh, no.”
“Um, yes. I admit I could have toned it down, but I was still angry about mom dying and my dad replacing her so fast. I was against his new marriage. Made a huge stink. We moved to New York, and it only got worse. She would beat me when she thought I was too gay.”
Lafferty’s heart stalled. “Beat you?”
“Yeah. Of course, the few times I mentioned it at school, she was able to twist what happened to make it sound like I was a bad child, and she was just punishing me for evil. They had me attend a Christian school. It wasn’t like people who cared were asking if I was okay. Nothing was good at all once she married my dad.”
“It sounds like you had it rough.”
They crossed the street at the light and kept walking. Eventually, Andries started talking again.
“When I turned seventeen, she decided she’d had enough. She made up a lie and told my dad I’d tried to have sex with the pastor’s son, who was only ten at the time. He believed her, and I had no room to tell the truth. I was kicked out. My stuff was tossed to the curb, and I wasn’t allowed home again. I’ve lived on the streets since. Of course, I barely even knew the pastor’s son. He went to school where I did, but I hadn’t ever met him. My Dad ignored the facts. Anyway, I tried working and tried shelters, but shelters can be worse, and you have to have an address to get work.”
“I’m sorry,” was all Lafferty could say. “Did you try talking to your dad again?”
The scent of cinnamon and waffles filled the street, and Andries stopped. Lafferty stopped and turned to face Andries before looking around, searching for the store making the delicious scent. The door to a small restaurant across the street opened, and the aroma grew stronger.
“Let’s get some of the good smelling stuff,” Lafferty said.
Andries cut his eyes to Lafferty and frowned. “I don’t have much money.”
Lafferty shook his head. “I’m not going to make you pay. Come on, let’s grab more food, and then we can walk again.”
“What about work for you?”
Lafferty waved his hand. “I’m fine.” He needed to take care of a few things, but he was avoiding work right now. He should focus and get the emails done and meet with the people he needed to meet with, but he was procrastinating. Usually, he worked in Europe, but he’d come home and not gone back. They didn’t really need him, not like they needed other people.
They entered the restaurant, and both of them sighed. The scent of good food and coffee wrapped around them. They ordered at the counter and took the silver cardholder with their number on it to the table. He sat with his back to the door because A
ndries wanted to see who was coming in.
His phone buzzed, and he glanced at the screen. It was Gresh wanting to know if he was coming home soon.
“Who is texting you?” Andries asked.
“My dad. He wants to know if I’m coming home anytime soon. He wants me there this Christmas.”
“Are you?”
Lafferty shrugged. “I love them, I really do, but I don’t fit well. I mean, I like the place, but it’s hard to go home knowing I didn’t really grow up there, and sometimes I get jealous which I shouldn’t, but I do. And then I feel bad, and then I get pissed and bitchy, and I need to leave and come to a shithole like my current apartment, so I can feel human. I also do work in other countries too. It’s weird. I’m hardly ever home in Houston, actually outside Houston, where the ranch is located.”
Andries chuckled. “I would love to live somewhere in the country.”
Their food was delivered, and they both moaned as they dug into the delicious waffles. They sipped smooth coffee between bites and said very little until the food was almost gone.
“This is good,” Andries said. “I haven’t eaten food this good in ages.”
“If you could do any job, what would it be?”
Andries shrugged. “I don’t know. I think maybe a teacher or social worker. What about you?”
Lafferty took a bite of waffle and held it in his mouth before he chewed and swallowed, his mind spinning over his job. “Honestly, I don’t know. I mean, I like my job, kind of. I don’t do much. I’m good at talking to people, so when they need someone smooth to represent the family, I get sent.”
Andries’ eyes narrowed, and he set his fork down. “You don’t really like it, do you?”
“What? Being asked to represent the family?”
Lafferty shook his head. “No, I do.”
“There’s something.” Andries took another bite of food as he stared at him. “You want more responsibility, don’t you?”
Lafferty shrugged. “Maybe. I want to be taken seriously.”
The bells on the door jingled, indicating it had been opened. Andries looked up. His face paled even more than it already was.
“What’s wrong?”
Andries opened his mouth, but he didn’t have time to say anything before a man who looked an awful lot like Andries was beside the table, pulling a chair up and taking a seat.
“Andries.” The older man sat with his mouth open, staring at Andries, drinking him in like a parched man in a desert who’d found a fresh spring.
Andries cleared his throat, and it seemed like he was having trouble speaking. “Dad” came out in a choked sob. Lafferty felt for him. Andries looked younger, vulnerable, and hurt. Tears filled his eyes, and Lafferty did the only thing he knew to do. He reached across the table and took Andries’ hand, squeezing, offering comfort though he didn’t know the man at all.
Andries’ gaze as well as his father’s shot to their joined hands. Andries sucked in a breath, and his father looked up, first at Andries and then at Lafferty.
“Dad, this is my boyfriend, Lafferty.”
“Boyfriend?” his dad asked.
A look crossed over Andries’ face, and Lafferty shivered.
“No,” Andries said. “Actually, he’s my husband, but we haven’t told anyone yet.”
Lafferty didn’t know whether to deny the words or just go with it. Andries had looked devastated when his father had come over to their table. The way he hadn’t been able to speak or move had gone straight to Lafferty’s soul, making him so sad. Then he dropped the bomb, upgrading them from having just met to being married without asking Lafferty if he would play along. If he didn’t, Andries would be hurt. But playing along with being a partner to Andries would be dangerous.
His dad sputtered then opened his mouth before closings it. “Married?”
“Yeah. I’m gay, remember? Being gay is what got me kicked out.”
“Oh God, Andries, I’m so sorry. I’ve been looking for you, and I couldn’t find you anywhere.”
Lafferty watched the pain play across Andries’ face. Then came the anger. He worried Andries might make a scene. He didn’t know the man at all and had no idea how he would react to his father’s statement. Lafferty knew if his parents had come to him after years on the street and said they’d been looking for him, he wouldn’t have trusted them.
“You were looking for me?” Andries’ voice was low, maybe too low.
His dad nodded then turned to Lafferty. “I’m Hagen Cosmos, Andries’ father, and you are?”
“I’m Lafferty Miller.”
Hagen reached out and shook his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Lafferty.”
“You really are going to do this?” Andries asked. “You’re really just going to shake my husband’s hand like you kicking me out didn’t matter?”
Andries had somehow kept his voice even, showing no emotions. Lafferty would have been screaming. He couldn’t imagine the pain Andries felt.
“I’m sorry. I should have listened to you. I don’t care about you being gay. And I know the other stuff was a lie.”
“What about Idella? Isn’t she going to be mad?” Andries’ voice dripped with pure hate.
“She’s gone. We’re divorced.”
Lafferty saw the anger and shock piling up in Andries’ eyes. This wasn’t the place to have this conversation.
“Where are you headed?” Lafferty asked Hagen.
“To work. It’s not too far. I just stopped in for a coffee and a sandwich to go.”
“We should have this conversation somewhere else,” Lafferty said.
Andries looked like he was going to argue, but he closed his mouth and took his hand back, crossing his arms over his chest as he glowered at both of them.
“My office isn’t the best, either. Can you both come to my house? I live on Hooper Street in Brooklyn. I’d love to have you over.”
“Text me your address and tell me the time.” Lafferty exchanged phone numbers with Andries’ dad then watched as the man stood. He looked like he was going to try to hug Andries but changed his mind when Andries shot him a glare full of malice.
Lafferty watched a mixture of emotions play over Andries’ features as his dad grabbed his order and walked out. He didn’t say anything. Instead, he sipped his coffee until Andries glanced up, worry so prominent it made Lafferty catch his breath.
“He’s going to find out I lied about the marriage.”
Lafferty set his mug down. “Hey, for now, can we just get you talking to him?”
“Why? I don’t think there’s anything he can say to make me change my mind. He kicked me out, took my money, and left me to die on the streets.”
“I’ll be by your side.”
Andries reached across the table, their fingers intertwining. “Why are you being so nice. I’m a stranger. You don’t know me.”
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I was in your position. I know you’re hurting. Even if you’re trying to play the tough guy, inside you want to be taken care of.”
A sob escaped Andries’ lips, and Lafferty couldn’t hold back. He moved to the chair next to Andries and held him as he cried. They were total strangers. He only knew this man needed comfort.
They left the restaurant and headed back to his small apartment, where he worked on emails and followed up with people while Andries spread his clothes out, then sat down and watched a movie. A little after noon, Andries made them lunch. Lafferty’s phone buzzed at three. It was Hagen asking what time they would be over. He almost hated asking Andries, but he didn’t have much choice. Andries had to make up his mind.
“Fine,” Andries spit out when Lafferty asked about going to his father’s house. “Make it six.”
“Sure. I’ll tell him.” Lafferty replied to the text, telling Hagen they would be there at six.
“My clothes should be dry by then.”
“Hey,” Lafferty jumped up and opened his closet. “You’re shorter than I am, but somethi
ng in here might fit.”
Andries’ face turned red. “I don’t need charity.”
“I know, but you also told your father we were married. I’m not having him think we can’t afford clothes for you.”
“Fine.” Andries huffed out a breath then shrugged. “Whatever. I’ll wear your clothes.”
“Thank you. It shouldn’t take too long for the train to get over there. Like forty minutes at that time of day.”
Andries nodded then swallowed like he was having a hard time accepting they were going to his dad’s place.
“You going to be okay?” Lafferty watched Andries nod, but he didn’t believe him. Andries wasn’t talking. There had to be a load of pain he hadn’t revealed. Lafferty wanted to help Andries, but he had no clue how. The only thing he could do was stand by Andries and support him, even if it meant lying.
Chapter Two
Andries had been shocked when he’d seen his father. At one point during his homelessness, he’d followed his dad around, watching him go about his day. He stopped watching and hadn’t known about the divorce. If he had, maybe he would have tried going home. Idella had ruined so much. Andries hadn’t known about the move either. Would having known about the divorce or the move changed anything? He somehow doubted it.
They stepped out of the apartment and made their way to the subway entrance. He wasn’t sure why Lafferty was still playing along. He’d screwed up and told his dad they were married. God, he was such an idiot. Why couldn’t he have just stuck with the boyfriend story?
“Hey, it’ll be okay,” Lafferty said before they walked down the stairs to get on the subway.
Andries nodded as they headed down the stairs with the rest of the people. Heat bloomed up from the underground, the scent of sweat and unwashed bodies hit him. He had been one of those unwashed.
At the bottom of the steps, Andries slowed and turned to Lafferty. “How can you know?”
“I don’t, but I can’t imagine it being terrible. We’ll go over, you can tell your dad how hurt you are, then when you want to leave, we’ll leave. I’ll take your hand and walk you out.”
“What about the next time he wants to see me? I don’t even have a phone. I’ve got nothing. No phone, no money. No way to contact him. Nothing. I don’t even have a subway ticket.”
