Simply Sinful (Simply Series Book 1)
Page 8
“Thank you.” She hated ceding control to Kane, but she had no choice for now.
She focused again on his large hand still covering her thigh. His thumb moved back and forth, his finger gliding over her skin. What was meant as comfort her body read as sensual. The rhythmic motion of his hand released a steady beat between her thighs.
His touch ruled her senses, but she still had presence of mind. He had set her up and used her in the name of his job. For him, it was a professional relationship after all.
She glanced at his taut jaw and his darkened gaze. Or was it more than professional? Her heart kicked into faster speed as the past twenty-four hours came back to her in a rush. The minute he’d slept with her, he’d compromised his job. He’d taken time off to care for her when his boss vetoed protection. He’d talked her sister into spending time with a friend. And he’d crawled into her bed to keep her warm. In Kayla’s book, that went beyond police protection.
The answers about Charmed! might have to wait, but the ones about Kane would not. “You could have left. Even your boss wouldn’t authorize this kind of protection.”
His hand stilled and his eyes cleared. “My gut told me the case wasn’t over yet.”
She swallowed hard and forced herself to continue. She might never get another chance to find out the truth. “And that’s the only reason you’re here?”
“If I’d trusted my gut instinct I wouldn’t have left you alone. You wouldn’t have been attacked.”
She tiled her head to the side. “So it’s guilt.”
“Reality,” he countered.
“Whatever.” Let him think what he chose. Neither answer accounted for the more intimate aspects of their relationship…like the hard arousal pressed against her belly each time she’d awakened in his arms last night.
“So you’re making up for…what?” she asked.
“Sleeping with you made me lose my focus.” His grip on her leg loosened and he stood. “It won’t happen again.”
“I see,” she murmured. A mixture of understanding and awe filtered through her. She’d gotten to him. She’d penetrated the tough exterior and made Kane McDermott feel. She didn’t know what women had come before her, but she doubted he’d ever lost focus because of a night of hot sex.
And hot sex with Kane wasn’t enough. The realization came to her as clear and strong as the sunlight streaming through the window. She blinked against the harsh glare. He walked across the room and drew the shades.
Kayla folded her arms over her chest and lay back against the pillows. If she’d gotten to him once, she could do it again. She had as much to prove to Kane as to herself. Her ability to trust her instincts was at stake. She’d read him so wrong that first night. She had to know she was right about him now.
Exhaustion threatened, but she couldn’t give in. She intended to test his resolve. He might think he was here as her protector to atone for his sins. He was in for a surprise.
She glanced across the room. He stood, legs braced apart, staring out the space in the blinds. She knew the muscles in those legs, the feel of him pulsing in her hand. She knew how it felt to be comforted and held through the night.
She wanted more from Kane than his guilt-induced protection. She wanted the opportunity to see if they had a chance. To see if this man was the one to breach her walls, and show her men—and relationships—had potential. To do that, she had to get past his barriers.
And Kayla intended to get what she wanted.
Chapter Six
Kayla suspected Kane would fight her by erecting barriers so high, she’d have to learn to mountain climb to achieve her goal.
“Kane?” He turned at the sound of his name, his hands tucked in his front jeans pockets.
“Thank you.”
“For?”
“If you’d come over here, I’d tell you.” She couldn’t trust herself to stand, and she couldn’t talk to him if he stood so far away. She had more than physical barriers to breach. She just hadn’t yet learned what the others were.
He walked over and lowered himself onto the bed, causing the mattress to dip beneath his weight. Kayla drew her legs up and scooted closer to the edge. Closer to him.
She placed a hand on his arm. Muscles tightened beneath her fingertips. She didn’t loosen her grip. “I appreciate your being here.”
“Why? I lied to you from the second we met.”
She’d expected to have to force truths out of him. Instead, he’d given her the opening she sought. “Because you were doing your job. I realize that now.”
“If I was doing my job, you’d have been protected before you got hurt.”
She laughed but knew better than to shake her head. Eating had helped, but she still felt drumbeats when she moved too fast. “Sometimes we mistake what our jobs are. I remember one night when I was younger. Catherine wanted to go out with her friends. I knew these friends were trouble, that she was headed in the wrong direction. So I snuck into her room and stole her wallet and what little money she had inside. She went anyway, and got caught sneaking out of a restaurant without paying the hefty bill.” Kayla gnawed the inside of her cheek, remembering the night the police officer had brought her sister home.
His strong hand touched her cheek. “What’s your point?” he asked in a gruff voice.
“We raised each other. It was my job to look out for her and I blew it.”
“Was she arrested?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No. The owner refused to press charges. He gave her a job washing dishes instead. The point is, I didn’t do my job, but looking back, it wasn’t mine to do. Just like the minute I walked out of that hotel room, I wasn’t yours to look out for anymore.”
He narrowed his gaze. “I agree with you about Catherine. As for me, I was still on a case.”
She raised an eyebrow. “Sleeping with me was work-related?”
“Don’t twist my words,” he said with a wry smile.
“Then let the guilt go.” Kayla couldn’t reach him if he hid behind his job and sense of duty. “Look, when you were a teenager, did you ever get in an argument with your mother, then storm out into the street?”
He met her question with a vacant stare.
Curious, she pushed on. “At that point, there wasn’t anything she could do to stop you from getting into trouble.”
“There wasn’t a damn thing she could have done about anything. She was dead.” His voice sounded distant. As if a robot were speaking.
Her mouth opened and closed again just as fast. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“Don’t waste your time feeling sorry for her. She killed herself. Took herself out of the game.”
Leaving her child behind. Kayla knew better than to voice pity for the boy he’d been. She was grateful enough for the revelations. She wasn’t about to discourage them by suffocating him in emotion. “And your father?” she asked.
His shoulders grew stiff. “Took a hike when I was five. Is there a point to all this?”
A smile tipped the edges of her mouth. “There was, but you’ve cut off every one I was about to make.”
Kane let the tension ease. She didn’t treat him with the sad look or pitying expression his friends, teachers, and the authorities had used in his youth. He hadn’t voiced his story again until now, but wasn’t surprised he’d confided in Kayla.
He’d known many women. None affected him on any level other than physical. None attempted to challenge him. He’d met his match, and he respected her for it. Respected her far more than women who played the weak heroine to get his attention and into his bed.
He’d begun having sex early in his teens—too often, he’d come to realize. Later he’d become smarter, more discriminating. Only one thing remained constant. He came and went with no thought to looking back or revealing himself. Not so with Kayla. After all she’d been through—thanks to him—she deserved a little honesty.
But that wasn’t the sole reason for his confidences now. He didn’t
want to think about why he wanted to share the most painful parts of his life with this woman.
She shifted, the movement revealing pale skin and an expanse of thigh that aroused him in an instant.
“My point is you aren’t responsible for me,” she said, meeting his gaze.
Primitive possession flooded his system. “The hell I’m not.”
In the face of his roar, she didn’t blink.
He admired her spunk. “You’re my responsibility at least until this case is over, so let’s drop that part of the conversation now.”
“Okay.”
He blinked in surprise. He hadn’t expected her to give in without an argument. “So you aren’t angry?”
“Not about the initial investigation, no.”
“And what came after?” He’d slept with her and lied while doing it.
“Pheromones,” she explained.
“What?”
“Two people attracted to each other by stimuli they can’t control.” She took her smart explanation seriously and he’d forgotten the intellectual side of this beautiful woman. “A chemical reaction,” she went on. “So if you’re still blaming yourself for losing focus, don’t. I’m equally at fault.”
“Meaning?”
“I wanted you, too.” She fiddled with the hem on her jersey without meeting his gaze.
This was the Kayla he’d first met. The innocent who threatened to chip away at his heart, if he let her.
Which he wouldn’t. But he couldn’t let her last statement go unchallenged. He had to know. Wanted, as in past tense?” he asked.
She shrugged and leaned back into the pillows. “Why ask? You’re a man of your word. You said it won’t happen again. Does what I want really matter?”
He could drown in emotion, in her. “Everything you want matters.”
Her expression grew still, then a tear spilled from the corner of one eye. “No one’s ever said that to me. I’m thankful for you, Kane.”
A low growl escaped from his throat. “I don’t want your gratitude.”
“Then what do you want?” She did her best to hold in her frustration.
“That’s a loaded question.”
“I know. That’s why I asked.” An impish smile played around her mouth, even as she wiped away a tear.
Kane knew what he wanted. Kayla, soft and giving beneath him. But she was right. He’d laid down the law. It wouldn’t happen again. But he knew what she needed—to be reassured that she counted. It was the only thing he could offer her.
He looked into her eyes—eyes that displayed her soul and mirrored his need. He braced his hands on either side of her face.
He caressed her cheek, careful to keep her head steady. “Are you sure you want to know what I want?”
“I wouldn’t have asked otherwise.” She touched a hand to the stubble on his face and ran two delicate fingers down his cheek. “You count, too, Kane. I wonder if anyone’s ever told you that before.”
No one had. No one would again. He leaned over and covered her mouth with his. To block out the truth…and to accept it at the same time. Her lips opened and her tongue sought his, not hesitant but eager. She licked his lips, ran her tongue over his teeth, learning and growing bolder with each taste.
He craved her. She was a drug he couldn’t get enough of. He threaded his fingers through her still-damp hair, then eased his lower body over hers. His arms shook with exertion, from the need to keep a safe distance between them, before he lost control and hurt her more.
Her hips jerked upward without warning. She brushed his erection with nothing more than the flimsy cotton he’d found in her drawer. He exhaled a harsh groan and eased himself on top of her, settling himself between her thighs.
It wasn’t enough. He was too damn hard. He wanted to rip off those panties and…A soft moan penetrated the haze of desire. He flipped over and off of her fast. Damn, but he’d made a mistake.
It wouldn’t happen again. Yeah, right. One battle lost, Kane thought, but the bigger war raged on. He rolled onto his side and glanced over. “Are you okay?”
“Too much too soon,” she whispered, echoing words he’d used day one.
He wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her against him. Once again, his need had gotten in the way of common sense. “Get some rest,” he said gruffly.
“I’m sorry.” Her shoulders remained stiff.
“For?” He worked the muscles beneath his fingers, kneading her soft skin. As a distraction, it didn’t work. He had a sexy woman in his arms and his body knew it.
“I’m a lot of things, Kane. But I’m not a tease.”
He heard the desperation in her tone. Her need for him to understand. “Did I say you were?”
“No. But I’m sure you’re thinking it.”
He sensed the source of her concern was based in her past and understood. “As a matter of fact, I’m not.”
“Then what are you thinking?” she asked.
That she didn’t need to dig into old insecurities. Not with him. He respected everything about her. “That I pushed myself on a poor, frail, injured woman,” he said with a crooked grin.
She laughed. His attempt to lighten the mood had obviously worked. “No, really.”
“That I wasn’t in the mood anyway.”
This time she treated him to a snort of disbelief. “Seriously.”
“I was thinking,” he said, pausing to smooth her hair and inhale the fragrant scent that was Kayla. “That what just happened…”
“Yes?”
“Was the best almost sex I ever had.” Just being with her was beyond good. Kane accepted how much he needed her, even as he knew he’d ultimately let her go.
No matter what emotion and softness she offered him, he’d take none. But for the duration of the case, he’d protect her with his life.
* * *
Fresh from an uneventful shower, Kayla made her way to the family room. Kane sat staring at the boxes she recognized as holding her aunt’s things. “I didn’t hear the doorbell.”
He glanced over his shoulder. “You should be resting.”
She scowled. “I slept half the day yesterday and all last night. I’m fine.” Or as close to fine as she could be with her attacker’s threat still echoing in her brain, her aunt’s reputation and her business in jeopardy…and having shared her bed with Kane McDermott for the past dozen hours.
Like her, he’d showered and changed. Judging by his appearance, she realized his clothes must also have arrived with the boxes. She wouldn’t be female if she didn’t admit she liked what she saw. Faded jeans stretched across his muscular legs. A black Henley covered his broad chest. The detective might not know much about cleaning his clothes, but he knew how to wear them. He just plain looked good.
She walked into her family room and knelt down beside him. Her thigh brushed his, a brief and accidental contact. Her stomach muscles curled into twisted bands of excitement and need. What should have been innocent wasn’t.
“You’ve got some color back in your cheeks,” he noted.
And it had nothing to do with good health, she thought wryly. “I feel better. Up to tackling those boxes, anyway.” She gestured to the opened cartons spread around the room.
“You showered.” He fingered her freshly washed hair.
She grinned. “Even I couldn’t share the bed with me a minute longer.”
“You should have called me.”
“So you could stand guard outside the bathroom? I’m not an invalid,” she assured him. And she didn’t want him treating her as one. His attention was nice, but she didn’t want his pity.
“I started without you.”
“Find anything interesting?” Her initial inspection of the contents had been cursory at best.
He shook his head. “There’re three huge boxes here.”
“I packed two of those myself. They lived in an apartment, and the landlord wanted it emptied as soon as possible so he could rent it out again. Anyway, Cat
herine and I gave most of their belongings to the Goodwill. My uncle had a niece who wanted some of his personal things. Catherine and I boxed the rest to go through later.”
“So the crossword puzzles…” His hand settled over the box nearest him.
“Anagrams and things. My aunt loved them. So did my mother. I used to do some when I was younger. I figured maybe I’d get back into them myself one day.” She shrugged. “The other box has knickknacks that have been in my family for years.”
“How old were you when your mother died?”
The question surprised her. It was as unexpected as it was unnecessary. “Didn’t your investigation reveal such a minute detail about my life?” she asked.
“Yes.” He had the grace to look ashamed despite the fact he’d merely been doing his job.
“So why ask?”
“Because I like hearing about you from you.”
She glanced down at her hands. It was her turn to be embarrassed. She’d already forgiven him. She believed what he’d told her earlier—that when he’d slept with her, his job hadn’t been on his mind. It had brought him into her life, but it hadn’t kept him there. When Captain Reid had denied protection, Kane could have walked away. He hadn’t.
“What about the business books?” he asked, obviously noting her silence and respecting her wishes by changing the subject.
“I was twenty, Catherine was twenty-one.” She answered his earlier question. “It was as if Mama chose the optimal time to let herself go. Neither one of us had to face social services or being separated.”
“Wouldn’t your aunt have taken care of you?”
“I suppose, but Mama loved us and wanted the best for both of us. Aunt Charlene never had kids and only related well to me because we both had that—” she tapped her head “—extra intelligence, I guess you could call it. But she had a harder time with Catherine because they had less in common.”
“I’m sorry—for both of you.”
She shrugged. “What you lived through was worse.” His eyes grew shuttered. His face cleared of expression, almost as if a curtain slammed down, closing out any audience to his soul.