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“You do know what he was doing to you, right?”
“I asked him to do it. ”
He arcs an eyebrow and bends his elbows so he can move in closer and it galvanizes my body. “You asked him to manipulate your feelings? Considering what you’ve went through, I would assume that’d be the last thing you’d ever want. ”
“I just wanted to see what a vampire could do. It isn’t that big of a deal. ” I pause. “And why does it bother you so much?”
“Because…” He locks his elbows to give us distance. “Look, you’re new to this whole aspect of life and I don’t want your curiosity to get you into trouble. Because it can. Trust me. ”
“You keep saying that… trust me. ” I lean forward, lessening the space between our faces. “Yet, I know nothing about you. How can I trust someone I don’t know? I mean, I’ve known Laylen for like twenty minutes and I already feel like I know more about him than I do about you and I’ve known you for a few weeks. ”
He isn’t intimidated by my take-charge attitude. He welcomes it, moving in even closer so our foreheads are converging. “That’s bullshit. I’ve told you things about me. ”
“And how do I know any of that’s true?” I ask. “After everything, after the sheer fact that you were around me for days upon days acting like everything was normal. Being able to act like that and omit the truth can only come from practice. ”
He pushes back from the wall and shakes his head. “Believe whatever you want, Gemma. See how far it gets you. ”
With that, he leaves and I have no idea what he means. I have no idea what anything means anymore. I’m a mess. A giant, erratic, emotionally driven mess that is supposed to save the world.
***
It turns out that Alex and Aislin still can’t get ahold of anyone, so there is a heavy amount of friction in the room. I sit at the table and watch Alex pace the floor with his hands crossed behind his back. He does it for so long I think he is going to wear a whole in the floor.
Aislin is in the end chair messing around with her phone while Laylen searches the bookshelves as a way to busy himself. I think there may have once been something going on between Laylen and Aislin because they haven’t once looked each other in the eye.
Aislin drops her cell phone on the table and slumps back in the chair. “Maybe we should just go looking for them. ”
Alex halts and unfolds his hands from his back. “That’s easier said than done, Aislin, since we have no idea where to look for them. ”
“I’m just trying to help. ” She frowns and scoops up her phone. “You don’t need to be rude. ”
“Did you guys ever consider that maybe they don’t want you to get ahold of them?” Laylen slides a book onto the shelf and walks over to the table. He hasn’t spoken in an extent amount of time and his voice seems to make Aislin and Alex edgy, but I like the sound of his voice. He grips at the back of the chair next to mine. “That maybe they’re hiding from you. ”
Alex shoves up his sleeves and tosses his phone aside. “Why the fuck would they be hiding from us?”
Laylen lets go of the chair and stands upright. “You tell me. I’ve been out of the loop for a few years now. ”
“Yet, there’s an underlying meaning,” Alex retorts, striding to the table, “written all over your face. ”
Laylen crosses his arms and so does Alex. They stare at each other like two dogs ready to rip each other’s throats apart. Aislin and I trade an uneasy glance, but we’re both afraid to intervene.
“You want to know what I think?” Stretching his long legs, Laylen makes a path around the table toward Alex. “That it’s not just a coincidence that Stephan, Marco, and Sophia are all unreachable when hell breaks loose. I mean, for all we know, they could be working with Demetrius and the Death Walkers. ”
“Why would you think that?” I interrupt. “I thought the Keepers were good. ”
“Gemma, just ignore him. ” Alex prowls toward Laylen with a cocky sway in his walk. They’re closing in on each other and their chests are heaving with their rage. “He’s full of shit. ”
As the two of them reach each other, I scoot the chair back from the table and stand up. “All of you are strangers to me, so I’m not sure who or what to believe. ”
Laylen cinches his lips together, holding back a grin as he looks at me. “Smart girl. ”
I want to say thank you, but the look on Alex’s face shuts me up. His eyes are flaring and his fists are balled so firmly his knuckles are chalk white. It’s like he thinks I’m supposed to straight up trust him. For the last few weeks, I’ve thought he was just a normal guy, who I happened to share some electrical bond with, and I thought that was because I was going insane.
“I’m sorry, but I’m confused and I don’t want to trust anyone at this point. ” I lower myself into the chair. He keeps his eyes on me and it makes me want to cower under the table. There is too much power and control in those eyes; it melts my inhibitions.
“Maybe we should go back to Laramie and check up on things,” Aislin speaks and cuts through the tension in the air. “There might be something back at the house that could help us figure this out. ”
“Are you crazy?” Alex asks, tearing his gaze away from me and focusing on her. “There’s no way we’re taking Gemma back to Wyoming. You saw how many Death Walkers showed up at the cabin. It’s too dangerous. ”
“I’m never going back? Wait. Why? I have a home there and a…” I stop because what else do I have there? A bed. Classes. Emptiness. Nothingness. Pieces of meaningless memories that are more weightless than dust.
“You can’t go back when the Death Walkers know where you are. ” His brow arches upward. “Does that upset you or something?”
“No,” I admit, “but where am I going to live? And what about my stuff?”
Alex puts his hand to his neck and pops his neck. “That’s a question only Stephan can answer because, right now, I have no fucking clue what the hell’s going on or what the next move is. No one prepared us for this. ”
“Prepared you for a Death Walker invasion,” I joke and then choose to keep quiet after Alex’s gives me a death glare.
“I think sometimes, your moods get a little confused,” he says. “Because a lot of them don’t fit the situations. ”
“Yeah, but at least I have an excuse,” I retaliate. “You’re just moody for unknown reasons. ”
“Oh, he has reasons. ” Laylen slaps Alex’s shoulder roughly and Alex winces. “He just won’t admit them. ”
Alex glares at Laylen’s hand. “That’s not what this is about. ”
Laylen steps back, shaking his head. “Yes, it is. All this,” his eyes flit to me, “is about wanting what you can’t have. ”
Alex raises his fist and targets it at Laylen’s jaw. Laylen does nothing but stand there, embracing it, as if he wants to feel the pain. I start to jump from my chair, but Aislin beats me to the punch, literally. She’s in between them before Alex can sling his fist forward.
She thrusts her hands out to the side of her and pushes both of them back. “Stop fighting. Fighting has never done any of us any good. In fact, it’s the main reason why we haven’t talked to each other in the last few years. ” She looks at Alex, then at Laylen, and then her hands fall to her sides. “Now, we need to focus on the problem and come up with a plan. ” Her shoulders rise and fall as she lets out a deep breath. “What we could do is leave Gemma with Laylen while you and I go back to Laramie and see what’s up. Check their houses, see if anyone is there or if anything gives us a clue to where the hell they disappeared to. ”
Alex’s eyes narrow at her. “There’s no way in hell I’m leaving Gemma alone with him. ”
Laylen laughs, but it was underlined with hurt. “Am I not even considered a person anymore?” Alex doesn’t respond and Laylen shakes his head.
“Here’s a thought,” I chime in. “It’s my life, so I think I should have some say in this.
And I say I’m comfortable with staying here alone with him. ”
Alex snorts a sharp, derisive laugh. “I’m sure you are. I got a full view of how comfortable you two are with each other when I walked out onto the porch. ”
Aislin’s forehead furrows and she looks at Laylen for an explanation. “Wait, what happened out on the porch?”
Laylen looks guilty and starts to open his mouth, but Alex cuts him off.
“Don’t worry about it. ” Alex pulls out a chair to sit down. He looks tired; there are bags under his eyes and they’re bloodshot. Positioning his elbows on the table, he lowers his head into his hands, looking defeated. “Aislin, how quickly can you get us to Laramie and back?”
She poises her chin up as she rounds the table and collects her phone. “As quick as you need me to. You know that. I’m good to go if there are only two people. It’s when there are too many that things get complicated. ”
“Then we’ll leave Gemma here. ” Alex raises his head and stabs a finger in Laylen’s direction. “But if anything happens to her, it’s on you. ”
He rolls his eyes and sits down at the table. “Nothing’s going to happen to her. As much as you hate me, you know I’m perfectly capable of fighting off some Death Walkers. ”
“Not in large numbers,” Alex says. “No one’s capable of that unless they have the Sword of Immortality, and no one’s seen it for a few years. ”
“I have to go back into the library and grab my candle and crystal first,” Aislin announces as she heads for the door. “Then we can go. The sooner we get out, the sooner all this will be over. I don’t like not knowing what’s going on. I’m a very structured person. ”
Laylen and Alex trade a glance and there is laughter in their eyes. For a second, they look like friends.
“Yeah, that’s you,” Laylen comments sarcastically as he turns a chair backwards and sits down in it; letting his lanky arms dangle over the top. “Miss Organized and Structured. ”
She turns around. “Hey, don’t be mean!”
Alex is tracing his finger along his palm absentmindedly. “He’s not being mean. He’s just stating a fact everyone knows. ” His eyes flicker in my direction. “Even Gemma probably has caught on to how disorganized you are. ”
I shake my head because I don’t know enough about her to pass that judgment. “I don’t know that. ”
“Well, you should,” Alex says. Aislin whisks forward and smacks him on the back of the head. His shoulders constrict and move upward. “Hey, I wasn’t the only one who said it. ”
“Well, you were the first one in my reach. ” She rolls her shoulders back to straighten her posture. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go get my Wicca stuff so I can use my awesome magic gift—which none of you have—to take us back to Wyoming. ” She starts toward the exit, but slams to a stop and smacks her hand against her forehead. “Shit! Shit. Shit. Shit. ”
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