by Raven Rivers
“Thanks. I’ve been collecting them for years. I usually put up my decorations and bake cookies. I don’t know how busy you two are, but I’d love for you to stay a while. You’ve got me in the Christmas spirit now.”
“With an offer like that, you’ll be lucky to ever get rid of us.”
Jade smiled at Gabby’s enthusiasm. “I’m really glad the two of you stopped by today. This is the best thing to happen to me since Calvin—”
“No more talking about it!” Gabby reminded her.
“So,” Jade began after a few minutes of decorating. “Which of you is driving already? I’m too shaky to get behind the wheel just yet.”
“Mikael’s been real good about driving us wherever we need to go,” Gabby answered.
“Jesus, is he outside now? We should invite him in.”
“I don’t think he wants to talk to you right now.”
“They’re all mad that I got Karl hurt, aren’t they?”
Snorting a laugh, Gabby shook her head. “You really are clueless, aren’t you?”
Chelsea explained quietly as she started placing ornaments on the tree. “No one’s mad about that. They don’t see it as you getting Karl hurt. They see it as them failing to keep you safe. They’re ashamed.”
“You still talk to all of them?” Jade asked, shocked by this revelation.
“Of course. They’ve all been so sweet,” Chelsea went on. “According to Luka, Yuri thinks you only contacted him again to deal with Calvin, and once that was over, you couldn’t wait to get rid of him.”
Feeling the bile rise in her throat, Jade ran to the kitchen sink knowing it was the closest. Before she realized what was going on, she was heaving. The minute she rinsed her mouth and wiped her face with a paper towel, she turned to face the two concerned women.
“That’s not how it is. I need to talk to Yuri.”
Gabby sighed. “Maybe you should to take a minute to think about what you’re doing. He’s already devastated by you asking him to leave you alone after he rescued you… again. You waltzing in and out of his life and telling him stupid shit like being with you is bad luck is going to confuse him even more. Maybe it would be best to leave him be until you can get your mess together.”
Chelsea, as always, chimed in last. “I know that sounds harsh, and it kind of is, but you aren’t the only one hurting here. Gabby is just trying to help you keep from messing up your relationship with Yuri so bad it can’t be fixed.”
Tearing up, Jade knew in her heart they were right in their thinking. “I honestly do need someone to talk to,” she admitted. “I’ve been sitting around here thinking I can mend myself back together, but I’m not so sure I can.”
Gabby hurried over and put a comforting arm around her shoulders. “Now, now. It’s okay. You have us. And tomorrow you can tag along to talk to our therapist.”
Jade laughed and cried at the same time. “I know how this is going to sound, but I’m glad I got abducted. If I hadn’t, you two would still be there. I’d still be a mousy little woman looking over my shoulder all the time. Worst of all, Calvin would still be out there torturing and killing women.”
“We told it like it was and everyone agrees you’re a real hero.”
Glancing up at Chelsea, she asked, “Who did you talk to? I don’t think the police see me as a hero. I clearly fall in the victim category in their files.”
“Holy crap, Jade, haven’t you been watching the news?”
“No, I’ve just been streaming movies.” Shrugging she added, “They’ve been my escape. They help take my mind off of things. Drown out the flashbacks. It’s step four on my list of twenty recovery strategies.”
Gabby smiled. “You’ve been all over the news. Your publisher and the police have refused to give anyone your address, or your place would probably be crawling with reporters. The reporters at our place have died down a bit because we’ve given so many interviews already.”
“That explains why my publisher’s been trying to call. I turned my ringer off and let it all roll to voicemail. I haven’t checked my messages. I’m surprised they haven’t sent anyone to check on me.” She added with a chuckle, “See? I told you if I went missing nobody would even know.”
Rolling her eyes, Gabby just shook her head. “What on earth are we gonna do with you?”
“I don’t know, but having you both here is wonderful. This is the first time I’ve been able to think about it without having a panic attack. We’re having actual conversations about it and I’m fine.” Gabby arched one eyebrow and Jade quickly amended her statement. “I’m doing fine except that tiny episode of throwing up. Trust me, this is coping.”
“We’ll see what my counselor has to say about it tomorrow.” Gabby’s head tilted slightly. “You know that the world is basically a safe place, right? We just happened to run into one of the few true psychopaths in the world.”
“What’s to keep us from accidentally running into another?”
Chelsea’s soft voice took on a steely edge. “First off all, us coincidentally running into another serial killer is mathematically improbable. I’m not going to roll over and quit living because I was unlucky enough to bump into one.”
“Besides, now we know exactly what we’re looking at when we see someone like that. That means we’re smarter than all the other potential victims out there,” Gabby said.
“But what about a copycat killer?” Jade countered. “It’s possible.”
“Yeah, in the movies,” Gabby laughed. “That almost never happens in real life. I wouldn’t worry about it.”
“I can’t debate your logic, ladies. Do we want gingerbread, chocolate chip, or sugar cookies?”
“Don’t ask a greedy-ass woman like me who’s been starved for a couple of years a question like that,” Chelsea smiled.
Gabby chuckled at her new friend. “I’m with Chelsea. Let’s make them all. I know Mikael and the others would love some fresh baked cookies.”
Perking up, Jade gushed, “I know it’s not nearly enough of a thank you gift, but it’s a step in the right direction.”
Rolling up their sleeves, they got to baking while getting to know each other better. For the first time in a long time, Jade finally felt alive again.
Chapter 29
Taking a Leap of Faith
Jade
Putting Sir Kitty in his cat carrier, Jade practiced the breathing exercises her new therapist taught her to do when she was stressed. She gave herself positive self-talk as she backed out of garage, leaving her house by herself for the first time since her brush with death.
“I’m in public and safe. Most people don’t care enough to talk to me, much less harass or abduct me. The world has billions of people, and psychopaths make up less than one percent of the population.”
Glancing into the rearview mirror, she smirked at Sir Kitty. “Don’t look at me like that, young man. You’re more terrified of going out than I am, if that’s even possible. We both need to walk the dunes. We’ve done it for years and we’ve always been fine, right?”
He hissed and mowed pitifully. “That doesn’t sound like positive self-talk, buster. Don’t make me break bad on you. I know I might have mentioned this a time or two, but I once knocked out a serial killer, and if you don’t pull your mess together, I’m gonna break bad on you, too.”
Sir Kitty made one of his happy purs.
“That’s a lot better.”
Pulling into the parking lot, she hopped out before she could get cold feet and turn around. Grabbing Sir Kitty’s leash, she snapped it on and pulled him out of the carrier. Smoothing back her freshly flat-ironed hair, she straightened her sweater. If she was walking today, she wanted to look good doing it. It was an unseasonably warm day, and she was glad she didn’t have to wear a bulky jacket. Sir Kitty realized where he was and his tail shot up as they began to walk. Jade smiled to herself. Things were quickly getting back to normal. As they walked, however, she couldn’t shake the feeling that others were
looking at her. Chewing on her lip, her anxieties came back, nipping at her resolve to stay grounded in the moment. She felt conspicuous, like they could see that she was a broken, nervous, or needy. She stopped and thought about turning around when a voice she recognized sounded off behind her.
“So you did get away from the bad guy?”
Twirling around, she saw little Jonathan Sanders running up to her with a hot dog in each hand.
“Jonathan! Yeah, I managed to get away and I’m fine now,” she smiled as they walked to a nearby bench and took a seat.
“I’m glad. We were worried when you went missing. Your publisher put up a fifty kabillion dollar reward for you!”
Laughing, she replied, “Fifty kabillion, was it?”
Taking a bite of one hot dog while shoving the other in her face in an obvious attempt to share, he shrugged and said with a full mouth, “I’m not all that good at math, but my dad said it was a lot of monies.”
Accepting the hot dog, she took a bite while Sir Kitty stared up at her hungrily. “Why thank you, sir. This is really good.”
Jade eyed his nice cable-knit sweater and dress pants with the crease running neatly down the leg. He was still dressing like his new dad and still completely adorable.
“I wonder why people are bad. What makes them that way?”
Realizing that her situation had brought up issues for her little friend, Jade took a stab at making him feel better.
“I think some people are born broken. There aren’t very many of them, so I don’t expect I’ll ever meet another one. You probably won’t either.”
“What if I do?”
Turning to face him, she said, “It would be good if you talk to your mom and dad about how to recognize dangerous situations and what to do if things go bad. I clearly wouldn’t be a very good teacher, because I apparently didn’t pay very close attention to some important red flags. It’s easy to look back afterwards and see where you went wrong. Hindsight is twenty-twenty, so they say. The hard part is recognizing the signs that things aren’t right as you go along.”
“That sounds like a good idea. I’ll talk to them.”
“Maybe you could make some videos that teach other kids how to stay safe. That would be a good public service,” she suggested.
“Yes, that’s gotta be easier than getting scientist to stop calling groups of iguanas a slaughter. We’ve been working on that for weeks and nobody cares about that.”
“Speaking of which, where is Queen Elizardbeth?” she asked.
“At home. It’s a bit too cold out here for him today. Iguanas are cold-blooded, you know.”
Natalie’s voice rang out. “Johnathan, what have we told you about wandering off?”
Shrugging, he dug his toe into the sand. “I saw Jade and wanted to wish her a ‘happy-you-didn’t-get-killed’ day.”
His mother looked mortified and quickly apologized for the boy’s choice of words.
Clearing her throat, Jade tried not to laugh. “He was real sweet about it. I’ve been thinking about having a nice dinner to celebrate that little fact on December twentieth. Would you and your husband like to come and bring Johnathan?”
“That would be really nice. He talks a lot about you and was really worried.”
“Sorry about that. I know Sir Kitty here is dying to show him all around our house. He found a little mouse hole in the wall when we moved in and has been camping out in front of it off and on for years. Nothing ever comes out, but he’s eternally hopeful, it seems..”
Natalie laughed. “You sure do have a writer’s imagination, Ms. Jade. I’ve become a huge fan of your work. We’d be delighted to come.”
“It’d be my pleasure. Oh, and I got the card you sent me. That was really sweet. The first card I’ve ever gotten, actually.”
“Oh? I find that hard to believe,” Natalie replied in disbelief.
“You’re the only person I’ve ever given my address to,” Jade shrugged.
“Well, after what you went through all those years ago, and again recently, I can’t say as I blame you.”
Jonathan gave Jade a big hug and disappeared with his new mother. That’s when it really hit her that what happened with Calvin was barely a blimp on the radar of life. The world just keeps right on spinning, even when bad things happen. People really had only two choices. Option one was accepting the world for the messed up place that it could be sometimes, then carving out a corner for oneself and filling it with all the things that made life worth living. The second option was just to roll over and play dead, never really living, loving or taking a chance on finding true happiness. Taking a leap of faith, she went with the former.
Chapter 30
Season to Be Jolly
Yuri
Staring at the round tin on the table for the third straight day, Yuri still couldn’t bring himself to open it. He knew it was filled with treats because his three comrades had received similar ones. Yet, Yuri stubbornly refused to open it and enjoy the sweet scents and tastes that she’d made for him. Wrapping his lips around one of those cookies would lead him to hope. Hope was a weak emotion, and one he could ill afford at the moment. So there they sat.
Mikael knocked on the open door. When Yuri jerked his chin, his longtime friend came in and sat in front of his desk. “You’re one stubborn bastard.”
“Don’t disrespect me, Mikael. I’m in no mood.”
“You are in a mood, alright. A dark one.”
“Leave me be. Go and enjoy your holiday.”
“I will if you do me one favor.”
“I’m about favored out, my friend.”
“This is an easy one. I wish you to have a look at my Christmas gift from a close friend of ours.”
“Did the redhead get you something naughty, like red boxers with hearts all over them?”
“That is as close to funny as you’ve been in weeks,” Michael chuckled. “And, no. I think she got those for Luka.”
Holding out his hand, Mikael held a copy of Jade’s latest book, The Bratva Boss, the one that told their story. Yuri looked at him quizzically.
“I’ve already seen this. And read it… three times.”
“This one is different,” Mikael assured him.
Reaching out, Yuri took the book and opened it to reveal a handwritten inscription.
Mikael,
I remember you as one of the men who saved my life all those years ago. I would like to take a moment and thank you for that and for your help in ridding the world of a killer. Although I have not had the pleasure of getting to know you very well, I want you to know that I respect you and care for you deeply because you protect what is most precious to my heart. Thank you so much for your dedication to ensuring the safety of the man I love most in the entire world. Please keep him safe. For all that you do, I am forever in your debt. If ever I can return your many kindnesses, please do not hesitate to let me know.
Jade Reinhold
“She wrote this after the abduction?”
“She wrote it a few days ago. The book was in the top of my tin. Each of us got a book with a special inscription. Karl’s apologized for him getting hurt protecting her. It makes me wonder what yours might say.”
Barely able to quell his excitement, Yuri replied gruffly. “I have done your bidding. Now, leave me to open my gift in private.”
The moment the door closed behind his friend, Yuri reached for the tin. She’d referred to him as the man she loved most in Mikael’s inscription. He was eager to see what she’d written in his. Tearing the gold foil wrapping paper off the book, he took a deep breath and opened it up.
To My First and Only Love,
I hope this message finds you in a forgiving mood. My one and only Christmas wish is to have you back in my life, my bed, and my body. I miss your smiling face, witty humor, and sexy body more than I have words to say. You are kind, generous, loving, and protective. You deserve to be with someone who can love you with dedication and loyalty. When I asked for
time, I was thinking a day or two to get my head straight, not weeks, months, or forever. I never feel home unless I’m in your arms and do so want to come home for the holidays.
Your Lyubov Moya for Always
Yuri’s heart was pounding wildly in his chest. He was up and moving towards the door before he willed it so. Reading her words was almost too wonderful to be real. Some small part of his mind thought it was a trick of some sort. The rest didn’t care. He just wanted to be warm and naked in her bed, to know that she was his for real and for keeps. Jade was his one and her siren’s call would always lure him. He’d work harder this time not to screw things up. For her, he’d leave his life of crime behind and work on his legitimate businesses. His restaurant alone was still doing quite well and, coupled with her writing, there was little doubt they could lead a normal life together. He could start fresh and forget his criminal ways, paving a future as an honest entrepreneur.
Pulling into her driveway, he saw her porch was decorated for the holidays in an elegant style. He also noted Luka’s car in the driveway, along with a car he didn’t recognize. Ringing her door, he fisted his hands nervously at his side. Her face lit up when she answered the door.
“You came!” Throwing her arms around his neck, she gushed, “This is the best present ever.”
Taking her roughly by the arms, he pulled her close and lowered his lips to hers. She spoke the moment his lips drifted down to kiss and lick the skin along her throat. “I missed you so much.”
“Then don’t send me away again.” His voice was gruffer than he intended.
Moving closer, she whispered, “Never again. I’m never going without you again.”
Feeling the anger and frustration ebb from his body, he kissed her hungrily.
“Who are you?” a young voice sounded.
Jade sighed and looked down at the boy who had snuck up beside them.
“Johnathan, I’d like you to meet my boyfriend, Yuri.”
“He’s really big.”
Yuri decided to get rid of the kid as quickly as possible. “It is because I eat children.” He didn’t know where the boy had come from or why he was intruding on their special moment, but he needed to go.
