Facing the Gray

by Carol Beth Anderson

  Sall said, “Here’s what we know. They have a list of a dozen people, probably all councillors, and they invited them somewhere. I wonder if this means there are twelve Grays on the council now?” Tavi could see that the possibility was as troubling to everyone else as it was to her. “Is there any way we can find out what they were invited to?” Sall asked.

  “I’ve saved the best for last,” Jenevy said. “I put this in my pocket before Aldin arrived.” She pulled out a half-sheet of paper and handed it to Sall, who read it aloud.

  “You are cordially invited to a celebration of the first day of spring at the home of Konner Burrell.” He scanned the rest. “The party begins at sunrise.”

  Tavi’s eyes widened. “And the first day of spring is just a week away.”

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Tinawe is considered a seedy city, and I suppose it has earned that reputation. But it’s so much more. The midwife house where I worked was in a district where many artists lived. Every weekend, a group of the Blessed—young and old, male and female—danced through the streets in front of the midwife house. I often joined them. We all activated our magic, and we were a laughing whirl of glowing, golden hands, eyes, feet, and more. I can’t think of anything, before or since, that has made me feel so joyfully free.

  -From Midwife Memoirs by Ellea Kariana

  Tavi woke and burrowed further under the covers. She was tired of winter. Tired of cold. Tired of being cooped up due to safety precautions.

  True, she’d been at the café with Tullen the day before. But each listening expedition was a taste of freedom, and instead of sating her desire to get out of the house, it gave her the appetite for more.

  She considered how they could use the information Jenevy had gotten. They’d discussed options the day before, but the only definite conclusion they’d reached was that they should talk to Evitt. He knew Konner’s house better than anyone. Perhaps he’d even seen parties there. He could give them advice on the best way to observe the event.

  Filled with sudden, nervous energy, Tavi threw her covers back and embraced the chilly air. She activated her touch gift and turned, holding her glowing hands up to the dark window. Her magic reflected off fresh snow on the sill outside, and she groaned. She was ready to trade in snowball fights and thick coats for green leaves and light sweaters. Winter was due to end in six days, but the weather didn’t seem to care what the calendar said.

  Tavi pulled on wool stockings, her thickest wool dress, and a wool sweater. I may as well be a sheep at this point. She put on her shoes, grabbed a few school books and supplies, went downstairs, and made herself tea. Then she settled herself at the dining room table and began working on a history lesson.

  The morning progressed slowly. Tavi got two days’ worth of school done, studying with Narre and Sall once they were up. The dining room was warm, thanks to a well-stoked fire. Every hour or so, Tavi proclaimed, “It’s stuffy in here!” She then spent a few minutes freezing on the back porch. Each time, she longed to walk out the front door and explore the city.

  That afternoon, Tavi and her friends trained with the local students from Savala, as they did on most weekdays. The local students were generally carefree and lighthearted, and they seemed confused by the intensity of the trainees from Oren. Meanwhile, the newcomers didn’t want to share the reason for their seriousness, so they stayed quiet, further widening the gulf between the two groups. It probably didn’t help when Tavi and her friends missed training or rushed off for urgent meetings with Pala.

  Tavi recognized the value of training, but as their detective work intensified, she had trouble taking practicum exercises, meditation classes, and lectures seriously. Their twice-weekly fighting training was the one thing Tavi still loved, and the students and instructors alike respected her for her hard-won skills.

  After training, Tavi brought a book into the sitting room, but she ended up looking out the window more often than reading. When she saw Evitt coming down the street, she jumped up and had the door open for him a full minute before he arrived.

  “I’m so glad you’re here!” she said as he approached the door. “We need your input on something. Let me gather everyone. We’ll meet in the dining room.”

  Once they were all together, Jenevy described her visit to the Gray House the day before.

  “We want to observe the meeting,” Sall said, “but we’re trying to determine the safest, most effective way to do so.”

  “Well, that’s easy,” Evitt said. “My mother is still friends with most of the household staff there, since she used to be one of their cooks. I’m sure Mr. Burrell will need extra help that day. My mother can ask to work in the kitchen, and she can offer my services to serve food or drinks. I’ll be your eyes and ears.”

  Tavi’s mouth dropped open, then widened into a smile. “Can you really do that?”

  “Sure. The cook keeps telling my mother to come back if she ever wants to work there again. And they already trust me since I work in the garden. They’ll prefer that I help instead of someone they don’t know.”

  “What if they’ve already chosen all their staff?” Reba asked. “This is only six days away.”

  “Everyone loves my mother there,” Evitt said. “Trust me on this. By tomorrow, we’ll be hired to help at the party.”

  Pala spoke up for the first time. “That’s wonderful, Evitt. And you’ll be sure to watch for as many details as you can, right?”

  “Of course. I’ll report back as soon as the party’s over. I’m happy to have a way to help; I haven’t been able to do much reconnaissance this winter.”

  Tavi couldn’t get the smile off her face. The plan was perfect. And it was good to see Evitt’s excitement to be part of the team. He turned and caught her eye, returning her smile. Her heart did a small flip.

  Tullen said, “Evitt, it will be helpful for you to attend the party. I think Tavi and I should be nearby listening too. You can’t be everywhere at once.”

  Evitt shrugged. “Do you really think it’ll help to listen when you can’t see who’s talking? You won’t recognize most of the voices.”

  “I’d recognize Konner Burrell’s pompous voice anywhere,” Tullen said. “And Tavi’s familiar with Konner, Ash, and Aldin.”

  “True,” Evitt said, “but it’s risky every time you go out in public. If it’s warmed up by then, you might look odd wrapped up in scarves.”

  “Tavi and I are going to listen.” Tullen’s voice was low and determined, and he stared at Evitt, his gaze hard as diamond. Tavi raised her eyebrows.

  “I think Tavi can speak for herself,” Evitt’s tone was nearly as firm as Tullen’s, and he turned pointedly toward Tavi, awaiting her response.

  Tavi bit her bottom lip, trying not to smile at the odd display from both young men. “I’d like to listen,” she said. “No one will care that we’re wearing scarves, even if it does actually warm up by then. It’s Savala; people don’t pay attention to strangers.”

  Evitt nodded. “If that’s what you feel is best.”

  Everyone else seemed to agree with Tavi and Tullen. The meeting broke up, and Tavi walked back to the sitting room, where her book was waiting for her.

  A few minutes later, Evitt came in. “No one has any messages for me to deliver,” he said. “I suppose I’ll head home and talk to my mother about getting us on the party staff.”

  “All right.” Tavi nodded at him, but her eyes were drawn to the window. She envied Evitt’s freedom to come and go as he pleased.

  “What’s so interesting out there?”

  “The world.” Tavi sighed. “The world is interesting, and I’m stuck inside.” She was about to return to her book, when a little bit of rebellion rose up in her, bringing her to her feet. In two steps, she was standing before Evitt. “Take me somewhere,” she said. “Anywhere. I’ll wrap up, of course, but I have to get out of here.”

  Evitt smiled slowly. “Are you sure? Aren’t you supposed to stay here?”

  “I�
��m supposed to be an effective warrior against the Grays,” Tavi said. “How can I do that if my soul is dying by staying inside?”

  Evitt laughed. “We can’t have any dying souls around here. Grab your things. I know just where we should go.”

  Tavi found Narre and whispered her plans. Narre didn’t approve of the idea, but she didn’t fight it too much. Maybe she was tired of hearing Tavi complain about being stuck at the midwife house. Once she’d gathered her coat, scarf, and gloves, Tavi rejoined Evitt in the sitting room. She bundled up in record time. “Let’s go.”

  Just stepping out the front door was thrilling. The street was icy in spots, and Tavi took Evitt’s proffered arm. “Where are we headed?” she asked, her voice slightly muffled under her loosely wrapped scarf.

  “It’s a surprise.”

  Tavi grinned and huddled closer to him.

  “What did Jenevy think about the Grays when she met them?” Evitt asked.

  “The biggest thing that surprised her was how normal they seemed. Wrey is very kind. Jenevy said she thinks that in a different world, they might be good friends. She also said Sella’s an expert at sarcasm, and they probably wouldn’t be friends under any circumstances.” They both laughed. “Aldin flirted with her, and she said Ash is just an ordinary man.”

  “She didn’t expect them to be ordinary?”

  “Think about the experiences we’ve had with them. Narre and I have met some of the Grays, but we were their captives. And then Tullen and I were captured by Konner. It’s easy to think of them as evil. Not to mention what happened in our forest back home.”

  At that, Evitt’s face turned toward her, and she read compassion there. “You’re right; you have good reasons not to trust them.”

  Tavi nodded. “But Jenevy thinks Wrey is just a nice young woman who got convinced to join the Grays without realizing what it would involve. It makes me wonder.”

  “Wonder what?”

  Tavi shrugged and tried to keep her voice casual, despite the serious nature of her musings. “I wonder if magic itself can really be evil. Gray magic, normal magic, whatever. Isn’t it a tool? Could it all be about the person wielding it, not the magic itself?”

  Evitt nodded. “I imagine in your place I’d be asking the same things.”

  “I don’t have any answers yet. But I’ve got to figure all this out. Reba said Konner plans to make Ash king by this summer. That’s coming up soon.”

  “And you want answers by then?” Evitt asked.

  Tavi glanced at him, then looked straight ahead. Was she saying too much? But she’d never sensed a shred of judgment from Evitt; in fact, he was the only one she felt she could talk to about these things. She took a deep breath. “Can I trust you, Evitt?”

  “Absolutely.” His answer was immediate, and she believed him.

  “I can’t believe I’m saying this out loud, but here goes. I don’t know if we can fight gray magic if we don’t have gray magic.” She closed her mouth and kept walking, watching her steps on the slippery cobblestones and very aware of the young man she held onto.

  “Whatever it is, Tavi, you can say it. I know you’re a good person. Nothing you say will change how I see you.”

  Tavi nodded, and she felt surprising emotion in her throat as she said, “Of all the Golds, my magic is the strongest. If one of us is going to get a gray awakening, shouldn’t it be the person who can make the biggest difference?”

  She risked another glance at Evitt and found him already watching her. She was about to apologize and take back everything she’d said, when Evitt spoke.

  “Do you have any idea how brave you are?”

  Tavi couldn’t help it; she laughed. “What?”

  “You’re brave. It’s so easy to do things the way you’ve always done them. But look at you! You’re thinking about sacrificing to help your cause. That’s bravery.”

  “I don’t know,” Tavi said. “It might just be stupid.”

  It was Evitt’s turn to laugh. Moments later, he turned to her, his expression serious again. “I know one thing. You’ll make the right decision.”

  “Thanks.” Tavi didn’t want to discuss this anymore; she’d planned to have fun, and now she was considering things that made her stomach tie itself in knots. She released her breath, watching the white cloud it formed, and let herself smile. “I’m freezing. Are we going somewhere warm?”

  “You’ll see. It’s just around the next corner.” They turned right, and Evitt made a grand gesture toward the building that stood there. “Here we are!” he exclaimed.

  It was a squat structure with multiple chimneys belching evidence of the warm fires inside. The brick was so discolored by years of weather and smoke, Tavi wasn’t sure what the original color had been. Above the door hung a sign with a picture of an owl. It had large, black blotches for eyes.

  “THE BLIND OWL,” Tavi read. She turned to Evitt. “Two questions: Why is he blind? And why is a pub named after him?”

  “Some of the best questions don’t have answers.” Evitt grinned. “But once you taste the food, you won’t care about the owl. Want to go in?”

  Tavi hesitated, her hand coming up to her scarf. She’d need to remove it inside, and she made a point not to do that in public. At the café, she and Tullen always sat outside with drinks, and when they took sips, they did so through gaps in their scarves.

  Evitt’s eyebrows shot up. “I forgot about your scarf! I’m sorry, Tavi, I wasn’t thinking.”

  Tavi pictured herself turning around and going back home, and everything in her rebelled against the idea. “The chance of a Gray being here is miniscule,” she said. “And if they do come, I can handle it.” She smiled and led Evitt inside.

  He was right; the food was delicious. Tullen cooked good food at the midwife house, and everyone else pitched in as needed. But the midwives tended to order the same ingredients each week, and Tavi was tired of the menu. She ordered beef stew and savored its tangy, peppery flavor.

  When they finished eating, Tavi asked, “Should we go?”

  “I was hoping we could stay a little longer. Every night—oh, perfect timing, here they are.” Evitt pointed behind Tavi, and she turned to see three musicians stepping onto a small stage at the back of the pub. The first, a young man, held a four-stringed czelt. The second man was old enough to be the first’s father. He carried two small drums, hanging from a leather strap around his neck. Last, a middle-aged woman sat on a chair in front of an instrument Tavi had never seen before. It was made of at least two dozen slats of wood, arranged in a line from shortest to longest, all set on a wooden stand.

  Without a word, they began to play. Tavi was delighted with the third instrument. Each slat of wood played a different note when the woman struck it with a mallet. Her hands moved with dexterity, occasionally blurring with their speed. The czeltist and drummer were just as talented.

  Then the trio sang. Their voices blended and diverged, shifting in and out of beautiful harmonies. Tavi had never heard the song before, but a few of the pub’s patrons sang along. Then an older couple began to dance in front of the stage.

  “Care to dance?” Evitt asked.

  Tavi shook her head vehemently. “I hardly ever dance.”

  “You said you never went ice skating, and look how fun that was.”

  Tavi stared at Evitt for several seconds, then smiled and stood, shoving down her nerves. This was a night for taking risks. And if she made a fool of herself, at least she’d never see these people again.

  Evitt didn’t know much about dancing either. They made up their own steps, stomped each other’s toes, and laughed so loudly, Tavi feared the band would chide them. Instead, the musicians beamed at them, joining in the laughter when they weren’t singing.

  Tavi had lost count of how many songs they’d danced to when she grabbed Evitt’s hand and pulled him away from the dance floor. She beckoned him to lower his head and said in his ear, “Everyone will be worried if I’m not home soon.”

&nbs
p; Evitt smiled and held up a finger, mouthing the words One more thing. Tavi put on her coat, scarf, and gloves and watched Evitt approach the stage, place a coin in a bowl at the front, and wave at the musicians. He returned, took her hand, and led her out.

  “I didn’t even think to bring a lantern,” Evitt said as they entered the dark street. “I’m glad there are plenty of street lights.”

  “Even better, we have our own light,” Tavi said through her scarf. She activated her sight magic, the only gift that would have much visibility with her being so bundled up. The golden glow reflected on the cobblestones before them.

  Evitt grinned. “Perfect.”

  After they’d walked in silence for a while, Tavi asked, “You don’t think your mother will have any trouble getting you on staff for the party?”

  Evitt brought his gloved hand up, grasping Tavi’s hand that held his elbow. “I don’t think it’ll be a problem at all. I’ll talk to her tonight.” He looked at her, his expression grave. “Are you sure you and Tullen should listen in? Is it safe?”

  Tavi laughed. “You ask me this after I’ve just spent two hours in a pub with nothing covering my face?”

  Evitt shrugged. “Good point.”

  The truth was, she was tired of just listening. Tavi wanted to be there, like Evitt would be. She wanted to see what was happening, to be available to take action if it was warranted.

  As they walked through public streets, something Tavi didn’t have permission to do, she reminded herself she didn’t need permission to fight the Grays either. She would work with the rest of the Golds, just as she’d promised. But nothing was stopping her from making her own plans too. Some things must be done alone.

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  With many brothers in the grave,

  Still Relin’s troops embraced the fight.

  His men were bold, so wild and brave,

  Yet just a few grew dark as night.