‘It cannot be that bad.’
‘I humiliated my fiancé, who was already awaiting trial for selling illegal liquor in an illicit club that was named after me.’
Louis’s eyebrows rose and an amused smile played across his face.
‘I became involved with my English professor, and my fiancé’s parents saw us together.’ Evie was talking fast, the words falling from her lips. ‘It was in the paper. In the column that I used to write. I was supposed to be there, covering the convention, which I’m sure is over and I don’t even know who won the nomination. I’m supposed to be in New York, hosting teas and wearing gowns; pleasing my mother. Instead I tried to do everything she never could and I made a grand mess of it all. I thought I was some kind of modern woman, doing things my own way. But in the end, everyone is hurt and embarrassed, and it’s all my fault. I’m not a modern woman at all. I’m just a silly girl.’
Louis took her hand, a gentle smile on his face. ‘You are hard on yourself.’
Evie looked up at him. His eyes were a soft brown, and there was a depth of understanding there that calmed her frazzled nerves.
‘You are a modern woman, Evie. Don’t doubt it. You crossed an ocean on your own to have an adventure of the spirit. That is something your mother would never have done.’
‘I ran away.’
‘You went looking for perspective.’ Louis wore a gentle smile, and in his acceptance and forgiveness of her faults, Evie felt better. She could almost forgive herself.
‘Thank you for saying so. I feel like such a rat.’
Louis laughed loudly and leaned back in his chair before bringing his face close to Evie’s again. He whispered, ‘You are many things, but you are not a rat.’ He quickly pressed his lips to hers and then sat back again, leaving Evie wide-eyed.
‘Did you just …’
‘I kissed you, yes. I couldn’t help myself.’
‘I …’
‘I will not do it again if you do not wish me to.’ Louis regarded her with wide eyes, and not a trace of dishonesty in his expression. ‘I could not let you leave without kissing you at least once. I believe I fell in love with you a little bit the first time I saw you at the door.’
Evie giggled, embarrassed at his attention. ‘I told you that I’m engaged, Louis. Or I was.’
‘I know. He is a lucky man. Or is the professor the luckier man?’
Evie stared at him, searching her heart for an answer. ‘I don’t know.’ As they sat amid the din and blare of lights and sound all around them, Evie felt as if she and Louis were in a separate world. He was forward, certainly, but she didn’t mind it. She liked his open nature and honesty, and at his side, she’d found the ability to consider her situation at home more plainly than she’d done since leaving. She loved both men, she had no doubt of that. But if she had to choose, she wasn’t sure which answer was right. And she may have already ruined everything with Roger, anyway. ‘Maybe the choice isn’t mine to make.’
Louis took her hand. ‘I am sure that it is. You have only to decide what you want.’
‘I have no idea what I want,’ she said.
‘Happiness?’ Louis asked. ‘Freedom to discover who you are?’
Evie nodded.
‘You are an adventurer. Make the choice that scares you most.’
As those words sunk in, Evie found herself inspired to do something she would never have done prior to that night, to meeting this man. She leaned forward and kissed him. It wasn’t a kiss of passion or ardor, or even of love. It was a way to say thank you, and to acknowledge the strange kinship that had developed between them in so short a time. She pressed her lips to his, and felt him respond. He laid a hand to the side of her face and as he sat back, taking his lips from hers, he traced her jaw with his fingertips.
‘I will always be glad to look back on meeting you tonight, Evie,’ he said.
Evie smiled. ‘Me too, Louis. Thank you.’
The moment dissolved then, the music and laughter that filled the club wafting around them, sweeping away the quiet intimacy they’d shared in that moment. Evie turned to speak to Janie and was surprised to find her wrapped in the embrace of the man she sat next to. There must have been something in the air!
At some point the group at the table rose and spilled out into the street. They walked along the river as the sun rose, and Evie held Louis’s hand. They shared no more kisses, and Evie felt happier at his side than she had felt in the last month. Louis, and his open friendship, had brought her a clarity she had been unable to find on her own.
Maybe, she thought, she would take his advice. She would make the choice that scared her most.
*****
Evie spent two more weeks with Janie, seeing Louis frequently. Buck had gone home two days after the party at Agnes’s house, but he and Janie’s aunt had made plans to see each other again. Evie had no doubt that her family would be sad to lose Buck if he chose to move to Paris, but it seemed more likely than Agnes giving up her gallery to live in a butler’s apartment in New York. And Evie had no doubt they truly loved one another. Buck had become a different man around Agnes, and Evie realized that she had taken his presence in her life for granted for far too long. She’d sent him home with an apology.
‘I’m so happy for you, Buckie. I’m sorry that you’ve had to spend so much of your time looking after me. I should have grown up long ago.’
‘You did, Miss Evie. It just took you a while to realize it. And spending time with you – watching you grow up …’ Buck’s light eyes became misty and for a moment Evie wondered if he might cry. ‘Well, it has been an honor.’
Evie hugged Buck, who had always been part teddy bear, part uncle, and part confidant. She waved as he boarded the train that would take him back to the embarkation point for his return trip to New York.
Agnes wept next to her as she waved at Buck where he appeared through the window of the train. When the train had departed, she turned to Evie and Janie and gave an apologetic shrug. ‘I never had expected to fall in love again,’ she said simply. Together, the three women walked back through the streets of Paris to Agnes’s home.
Soon enough, it was Evie boarding a train, with Louis, Janie, and Agnes on the platform waving goodbye.
Janie had fallen in love, too, it seemed. Evie had met the young man from the club several times and expected there to be a wedding announcement soon. Louis, for his part, seemed to accept Evie’s appearance and disappearance from his life with a philosophical attitude.
‘We met for a reason,’ he told her as they stood next to the train. ‘And we have both given something to the other that we will carry forward through our lives. Thank you.’ He embraced her, holding her tightly to him for long minutes before releasing her again. ‘Remember,’ he said. ‘Always choose the thing that seems most fearsome.’
‘You too, Louis.’
Evie thanked Agnes and Janie, and boarded the train with dread, knowing that another week-long boat ride was in her future. She hoped she wouldn’t be as sick as she had been on her first trip across the cold, angry Atlantic.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Tug
‘This place is hitting it on all fours!’ Texas cried, looking around the club she’d left Tug to manage. ‘Attagirl!’ The buoyant blonde pulled Tug into a rough embrace and continued to offer her praise as the club around them vibrated with the energy of the band, the dancers, and the drinkers.
‘Thank you,’ Tug said. Praise from Texas was worth all the trouble she’d gone to in order to get the showgirls outfitted and the band in sync in time for the owner’s visit.
‘You’ve really done it. I knew you could.’ Texas sat down on a stool and pulled a flask from her garter, pouring its contents into a glass on the bar top in front of her. ‘You know, I wasn’t sure what was gonna happen in this town,’ she said.
‘What do you mean?’ Tug asked, scooting close.
‘With the Klan wandering the streets and holding picnics just across t
he river, it kind of seemed like anything might come out of that convention. And when Al Smith had to back out, I thought clubs like this were done.’
‘Think Davis will crack down?’
‘He’s a wild card, that’s for sure,’ Guinan answered, sipping her drink. ‘I’m just glad to have the Klanbake over and done.’ It had been the longest party convention in history, with both favored candidates deadlocked for more than one hundred votes as the party struggled to come together to put forth one candidate for the upcoming presidential elections.
‘Well I hope the man they chose likes a drink now and then,’ Tug said, grinning.
‘Me too.’
The women talked a few minutes longer and then Tug turned toward the door. Chuck was standing just inside the doorway, talking with the doorman. Tug couldn’t keep the grin from her face. She and Chuck had developed an incredible affection that she never would have predicted, and she almost believed that she could feel the atmosphere shift when he was nearby.
Chuck caught her eye and grinned across the crowded room at her.
‘So you’ve finally come around?’ Texas asked, winking. ‘Handsome, ain’t he?’
‘We’ve been seeing each other,’ Tug confirmed.
‘Well don’t get married and leave me empty-handed here. I’m counting on you!’
‘That’s definitely not my plan,’ Tug assured her.
Chuck approached the pair, smiling broadly. He took Tug in his arms and kissed her gently on the cheek.
‘Chuck, you remember Texas Guinan,’ Tug said, introducing them.
‘I hear so much about you,’ Chuck said. ‘It’s wonderful to see you again.’
Texas stood and looked Chuck up and down before breaking into a broad grin. ‘Well, it’s nice seeing you again, too. You’ve got yourself a nice-looking young man here, Tug.’ Texas shook Chuck’s hand and then leaned in close. ‘Don’t steal her away too soon. I plan to work her into her old age.’
Chuck laughed. ‘I couldn’t tell Tug what to do even if I wanted to!’
‘Don’t forget it,’ Tug said, punching his shoulder playfully.
‘Well, I’ll leave you kids here,’ Texas said. ‘I’ve got another club to check in on. Keep up the good work, Tug.’ Texas turned and wove through the crowd toward the door.
‘She’s pretty straightforward,’ Chuck said.
‘Isn’t she fantastic?’ Tug said, watching her boss disappear.
‘Not as fantastic as you are.’ Chuck pulled Tug close and kissed her slowly, taking his time and teasing her lips with his tongue until Tug could barely stand.
When she regained her breath, she reminded him that she was supposed to be working. She swelled with happiness as Chuck took a seat at the bar and settled in to keep her company. As she went about the business of minding the club – introducing the dancers and the band, serving drinks when things got busy, and keeping things running smoothly – she felt herself glowing. This, she realized, was what she had been looking for all along. She had found someone to love and support her exactly as she was, and he’d been right in front of her this whole time. She smiled across the bar at him, and realized something else. For the first time in her life, she felt truly satisfied.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Evie
The return trip across the Atlantic had been almost as bad as the trip over, and when Buck met her at the dock, Evie felt as if he practically scraped her up and put her in the car.
‘Let’s get you home, Miss Evie,’ Buck said, looking anxious.
Evie didn’t argue, but she had no intention of taking to her bed for days on end again. She would sleep this off and then attend to the business at hand.
She let her mother fawn over her, and hugged her father. She ate a few bites before stretching out in her own bed, and she found that sleep came easily in the familiar room, surrounded by her own things. When she woke the next day, it was late in the morning, but she felt much better.
Downstairs, her mother sat at a desk, penning a letter, and looked up with surprise when Evie entered fully dressed.
‘I thought you’d be in bed for days!’ she cried. ‘You look much better. So thin, though.’
‘I’m fine, Mother.’
‘Maybe you should rest a bit longer. Buck!’ she cried. Before Buck appeared in the room, she turned back to Evie, looking upset. ‘Did you know Buck was leaving us? Another week, and we’ll have to find a new man.’ Her mother put a hand across her cheek, as if the idea of looking for a new servant was more than she could bear.
Evie smiled when Buck appeared in the doorway, and her heart swelled with the knowledge that he had found someone to share his life with.
‘Can I get you something? Good morning, Miss Evie.’
‘Good morning, Buckie,’ she said.
‘Tea?’ Mrs McKenzie asked Evie. ‘And some bread, please?’
Buck disappeared and Evie sat on the couch facing her mother’s chair.
‘Tell me everything about Paris!’
Evie wondered where she should begin. She covered safe topics like decor, architecture, and food. Her fondness for Louis made her want to mention him, but her mother was already under the impression that she was a wanton and careless girl, so Evie left that out.
‘Oh, it sounds wonderful,’ Mrs McKenzie said. ‘I’ve never been. Your father and I will have to go!’
‘You should.’
‘And I think that unfortunate situation has blown over,’ she said. The older woman shifted in her chair, looking suddenly uncomfortable. ‘There is one thing, though.’
Evie watched her mother fidget. She had rarely seen her at a loss for words. ‘What is it?’
Confusion crossed her mother’s face, and then she seemed to decide something, her expression clearing. ‘No, it’s nothing. Nothing to worry you with.’
Evie was in a bit of a hurry to leave the house, so she stayed as long as she felt she should and then excused herself. ‘I need to visit the school and find out what I’m to do about re-enrollment.’
Mrs McKenzie deflated. She had never been a fan of Evie’s determination to go to college. ‘Be home for dinner, dear.’
‘I will.’ Evie slipped out and boarded a streetcar headed downtown. When she stepped onto the curb outside the campus, her blood was rushing and her heart was beating furiously.
She walked toward the building where Jack’s office was, not entirely sure what she was going to say to him. All she knew was that she needed to speak with him. And the sooner, the better.
She focused on different ways she might word what she needed to say, so enveloped in her own thinking that she barely noticed that an entire room full of students turned to look at her as she entered the lecture hall at a fast pace. She stopped, flushing, as she looked at the sea of faces. To her left, another face stared.
Jack had been interrupted mid-sentence and seemed momentarily unable to continue his lecture. After an uncomfortable pause, he said, ‘Miss McKenzie, how nice of you to rejoin us.’ With that simple acknowledgement, Jack’s gaze returned to the students before him, and he turned to face away from Evie.
Through the weeks she’d been away and the long nauseating voyage home, Evie had imagined many variations on their reunion. None of her imagined scenarios had gone this way. She took an empty seat toward the back of the lecture hall and let her mind torment her with things she might say when the class finally ended. Given his cool reception to her entrance, she wondered if Jack would even be willing to speak with her. Jack continued his lecture in an even, steady voice, and didn’t look at her once.
After what seemed like hours, students around Evie began to rise and leave the room. Evie waited until almost everyone had gone and then approached the front of the room, where Jack was bent over his notes.
‘Jack?’ Her voice sounded timid, weak.
He didn’t look up immediately, and Evie’s heart began to sink. Was he just going to pretend she hadn’t spoken?
Finally, he looked
up, and the clear emotion on his face startled Evie. His eyes were moist and he looked as if he was about to speak, but no words escaped his lips. Instead, he sighed and his shoulders sagged. His voice was quiet and ragged. ‘I thought you would never come back.’ He looked at her again, the clear blue eyes full of some emotion Evie couldn’t identify, and then he turned and walked toward his office.
Unsure what to do, Evie followed him. Once inside the dark paneled room, Evie pulled the door shut behind her.
‘I wanted to see you right away,’ she said.
Jack sat heavily in the chair behind his desk. He did not invite her to sit down.
Evie began to doubt herself. She stared down at her hands, pulling at one another nervously. ‘Maybe I shouldn’t have come, maybe this was a mistake.’ She took a step back toward the door.
‘Wait.’ Jack said the word, but his face remained impassive. ‘What is it you came to say?’
‘I’m sorry I just left,’ she said. Her words were slow, uncertain. ‘I thought about everything while I was gone. I thought about you, about us …’ Her words were gaining momentum, her voice thick with emotion. This was not what she’d planned, but with no reaction from Jack to gauge his feelings, she had to just plow ahead or she’d lose her nerve. ‘But I realized so much while I was gone. I’ve been so stupid, so blind. I love you, Jack. I’ve loved you since I met you, and I was a fool not to know it …’ She paused, lifting her eyes to his.
Jack sat perfectly still and silent.
‘Won’t you say something?’ Evie felt as if she were on the verge of insanity, every imaginable emotion swirling within her and threatening to cause her to explode.
Jack Taylor rose from his chair, and in one fluid motion had crossed the room and taken her into his arms in a rough embrace.
It happened so fast, Evie found herself gasping for breath.
The Glittering Life of Evie Mckenzie Page 19
