“Hello, Lilly. How are you? I’m fine.” Tony was trying to tease a smile out of her.
Lilly started to cry.
“Lilly, you cry a lot. You know that? What do you need?”
“Blood,” Lilly whispered.
“What?” Tony thought he had misheard.
“Blood,” she said a little louder.
“Why?”
“Little Brian, my brother, is in the hospital,” Lilly sobbed.
Tony walked her to the chair. “Christ, was he in an accident?”
Lilly fought to control her tears. “He needs blood type O positive. He has leukemia. He’s so sick. We can’t even visit him, ’cause if he gets a cold, he’ll die. He’s only five.”
“I don’t know what blood type I have, but he can have some,” Tony said
“He’s at Bronxville Hospital. Go to the blood bank. Tell them it’s for Brian O’Dwyer. You have to weigh 110 pounds to give. Do you? I can’t give him even a little.”
“Wait here. I’ve got to get that car.” Tony started for the door, motioning for Lilly to sit still.
When he came back in, he said, “How long has he been sick?”
“A month. We only found out it was leukemia last week. Then he got so sick.”
Tony took a dime from his pocket and called his father. “Pops, listen. A friend of mine’s brother is sick; he needs blood. This kid is only five years old. I’m going to the hospital after work. Can you pick me up?”
Tony smiled and gave Lilly the thumbs up.
She listened to his side of the conversation. “Brian O’Dwyer. Lilly, the little lost girl. Her brother.”
Life at the O’Dwyers had gotten rough. Bridget had found religion. She had always been Catholic, but since Brian had become ill, she had started attending Mass each morning and Stations of the Cross on Thursday afternoons. The rest of the time, she walked around the house, going through the motions, not seeing what was in front of her. She became angry with Owen for dying, and the O’Dwyer children feared she was losing her mind.
The family started to drift out of control. Ann and Colleen ran the house. The twins were confused and whined constantly. Lilly often sat them on the piano bench and sang to them.
The children had always attended Sunday Mass. But when Brian got sick, Lilly got mad. She began to hold the religion in disdain, which in 1967 was not uncommon. Lilly started going to her friend Eileen’s for “church” on Sundays. Eileen, who was already a card-carrying rebel, would raise her hand in a mock blessing as Lilly entered the door.
Lilly’s room ran the entire length of the third floor. The house was on a quiet corner, and Lilly had the piano under a window where she could look out as she played.
The twins decided to change rooms with Ann, giving Ann her own room and Lilly two roommates. Lilly had no chance to protest. When she came home from babysitting, the deed was done. She adopted the twins, helping them with baths and dressing and walking them daily to the lady from church who watched them while Brian was sick.
Bridget mentioned to Lilly that Tony and his father, then three more uncles, then half of the Yonkers police force had given blood.
Lilly was proud. While shopping for a coloring book for Brian and some sheet music, she decided to buy a gift for Tony. She chose a dictionary. What her mother had said about Tony’s vocabulary had stung. She gift-wrapped it and brought it to babysitting, but when she saw Tony’s friends at the gas station she held back.
She decided to have “Mass” at Tony’s that week. She remembered that Tony’s father had also given blood, so he would need a gift, too. She stole some tulips from their neighbors, the Murrays. Mrs. Murray was the neighborhood watchdog, constantly on the phone to report someone’s transgressions to his or her mother. The Murray boy, who was in Lilly’s class, smirked when she was reprimanded. She knew they would be at High Mass so they wouldn’t be home to guard their yard.
She ran down to the della Robbias, and Frankie answered the door.
“Hello, you must be Frank.” Lilly smiled. “Is Tony here?”
“Come in.” Frankie looked at the flowers. “Just a second.”
He directed her to the sofa.
“Mr. della Robbia?” Lilly asked the middle-aged man who walked into the room.
“Yes,” he answered softly.
“I’m Lilly O’Dwyer. You gave blood to my little brother, Brian.”
“Yes,” he answered warmly.
“These are for you.” She gave him the tulips, “Brian is doing really well. We expect him home next week.”
Tito took the flowers and looked at them, then at Lilly.
Tony walked into the room. Frankie had told him a girl was here with flowers for him, and he had expected Mata Hari. He was a little disappointed that it was only Lilly.
He saw his father with the flowers and said, “Pops, does Ma know you have a girlfriend?”
Lilly blushed, then handed Tony a gift. “I brought you a gift for helping my brother.”
Tony said, “You didn’t have to bring me nothing.” He took the gift, unwrapped it, and said, “A dictionary, gee.” He sounded disappointed
“I figured you needed it,” Lilly said in a snotty voice.
“What? Why?” Tony asked.
“Well you’re not going to win any scholarships saying ‘gotta,’ ‘gonna,’ or ‘yeah.’ I thought, if you are serious, this might help.” Tony stared at her.
Lilly turned to leave. “Bye.”
“Lilly …. Thanks … I mean … I have a record you’d like. It’s a Yard Bird album.”
Lilly walked back into the room. They were listening to the record and reading the record jacket when the doorbell rang.
Tony’s mother answered it. “Carmela … uh Carmela … ,” Isabel repeated blindly.
“Isabel, ain’t you glad to see me? I gotta talk to Tito. He here?”
“No, get out! Did Mama give you the address?”
Isabel was trying to back Carmela out the door.
“Hey, Tito!” Carmela shouted.
Tony and Frank watched suspiciously. Neither recognized this coarse loud woman, but both knew who they hoped she wasn’t.
Tito appeared. “Get out of my house, slut.”
Carmela wasn’t put off. “Tito, you and me gotta talk.”
“We have nothing to talk about,” Tito said in a cold, low voice.
“Sure we do. Money. I never got no alimony. You know I’m American. You’re just a wop.”
“I’m an American, now.”
“I want money.”
“You’ll never get a penny. Now get out.”
Carmela evaded his shove and walked into the living room “These my kids? Anthony, Frank?” She nodded at each.
“They’re not your sons anymore. They’re mine. Keep away from them.” Tito rushed between her and the two boys.
“Yeah? That’s what you think. I want alimony or things get ugly,” Carmela sneered.
Isabel rushed forward. “Carmela don’t say it.”
“You never told him? You keep a secret. I woulda never guessed.” Carmela spoke slowly: “Your son, Tito? Your precious Anthony? Ask Isabel. She knows who the father is. Her old boyfriend.”
Isabel grabbed Carmela and pushed her to the door with fury. “He’s my son! They’re my sons! Get away from my family, you evil witch.” She projected Carmela into the hall, slamming the door so hard it sprang back.
Tony felt dizzy. He looked at his father who was slumped in a chair. Tony ran from the apartment.
Lilly consciously closed her mouth, stood up, and walked to the doorway. “Excuse me. I have to go home.”
She carefully shut the door, went to the elevator, and pressed the button. She didn’t want to meet either Tony or the witch in the lobby. She turned and took the stairs. She almost tripped on Tony, who wasn’t aware she was there. He looked in shock. His face was pale, and there were beads of sweat over his lips and forehead.
She stayed above him and thought. “T
ony.” She waited a minute. “Tony.”
He looked at her.
“That was terrible for you.” She waited. “You still like the Yard birds?”
“Yeah?” He looked at her as though she were crazy.
“That’s ’cause you’re the same person as yesterday. You’re still you.”
He looked at her. “But my father…”
“You think he’s going to stop being your Pops?” She interrupted. She waited, adding, “Are you not going to love him anymore?”
“Of course not.” Tony paused. “But you see, Ma’s not really my mother and Pops … Jesus, they could throw me out any time.”
“No, no! Tony, a person who would give his blood for someone else’s boy, he wouldn’t stop loving his own.”
“But I’m not,” Tony said.
“Tony you are still you.”
He turned away. She felt like she was intruding. “Well, see you.” She walked down a few stairs.
“Lilly?” he called urgently.
“Yes?” She turned.
“Don’t … I mean … you won’t … tell anyone?”
“No! I swear it, never! I swear on my father’s grave! I’ll never tell anyone.”
After that day, Lilly called hello to Tony every day when she finished her babysitting job. Since Brian’s illness, everyone was needed to run the household.
Brian came home on schedule. The O’Dwyers walked on tenterhooks. Bridget hovered over Brian, and if he so much as sniffled, Bridget got a stricken look that frightened them all.
Brian escaped by going to the third floor to play with the twins. Lilly taught him basic scales, then “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.” He tired easily and when he did, he moved to the lower bunk where he could lie and listen to Lilly, who sang to him and played rock and roll.
The O’Dwyer’s began to trust the remission and life started to normalize.
One afternoon, Lilly went to the service station after babysitting. “Hi. Isn’t it gorgeous out? I can’t believe it’s May.”
“Hi,” Tony said quietly.
“What’s the matter?” Lilly asked, more alert. “Are things uncomfortable because of what happened?”
Tony would not look at her. He sat throwing spitballs at the calendar girl.
“You’ve got a customer,” Lilly told him and walked out of the station.
Lilly went back the next day and waited for him to finish all the cars that had come into the station simultaneously.
“Hi, Lilly,” he said, leading her into the office.
“Tony, are you going to talk to me today?”
“Yeah … yes,” Tony said.
“What’s wrong?” Lilly asked softly.
“You have the answers, girl. My father doesn’t look at me anymore, doesn’t talk to me, it’s like I wasn’t there.”
Tony watched the corner of the desk while he spoke. The room was silent for a minute.
“Did you talk to him?”
“I can’t.” Tony slashed the air with his head. She saw his shame.
“Don’t be ashamed. You didn’t do anything. About your father, I’ll have to think about it. I have to go home now.”
Lilly decided to talk to Mr. della Robbia for Tony. The next morning, she brought all of her babysitting money when she left for school. Instead of school, she found a pay phone and called the City of Yonkers.
“Where is the incinerator located?” Lilly spoke in the most mature voice she could muster.
She was given the address. She took a crosstown bus and, on the driver’s instructions, transferred to another bus. Lilly had never taken a bus alone before. She felt both very old, and very young.
When she found the incinerator, she stood outside listening to the big furnaces rumbling. She found a door and knocked, then steeled herself and walked into the building. A man was working at a large board.
Lilly walked up to him, “Excuse me, sir.” The man looked surprised. “Where could I find Mr. della Robbia?”
“You wait here, kid.” The man walked to the office and returned with Tito.
Tito stalled outside the office door. He was trying to evaluate what this girl in the plaid school uniform was doing here. He decided she was going to ask for blood again. Tito approached then and steered her by the arm to the door.
“Mr. della Robbia, may I talk to you, please?” Lilly pleaded.
“Yes, out here,” Tito said.
“Mr. della Robbia, I’m a friend of Tony’s … ” Lilly started.
Tito replied, “The Irish girl, with the sick brother. Does he need more blood?”
“No, Mr. della Robbia. I came to talk about Tony. He doesn’t know I’m here.”
Her voice faltered. Then, she continued, “Mr. della Robbia, Tony loves you. He thinks you don’t love him anymore. He feels so ashamed. He can’t talk to you. He always talks about you, my Pops this or my Pops that, and when we spoke yesterday I told him to talk to you. He said he couldn’t. I think it’s his pride.”
Lilly ran out of steam. She looked at the ground. Tito didn’t say anything.
“Well I’ve got to go. Goodbye Mr. della Robbia. I’m sorry if I shouldn’t have come.”
Tito nodded then touched her head. “You’d better get to school, Lilly.”
She walked away and soon started to run. She was in an unfamiliar section of Yonkers. She came to a park, where she sat. She feared she’d stuck her nose where it didn’t belong and made things worse.
She sat for an hour, since she had time to kill before school let out.
A cop came up to her. “Why aren’t you in school, young lady?”
Lilly looked up, sure she was caught. “Well, sir, my school had a half day because of a teachers’ conference.” Lilly smiled innocently.
“What school?”
“St. Clare’s, on Tuckahoe Road. We got out at eleven.”
Then trying to change the subject, she asked, “Do you always get to walk in the park?”
“This end of the park is on my beat. I guess I’ll be seeing more of you kids this afternoon.” The cop nodded and walked on.
Lilly became nervous about cutting school. She walked across Yonkers, feeling a sense of dread as she approached her house. She opened the door and knew she was caught. The twins were on the stairs staring down at her.
Her mother came to the doorway of her father’s study. “Lillian come in here.”
Lilly felt her knees knocking. Her mother closed the door behind her, and took her by the shoulders and shook her. “Where were you? Where were you?”
Lilly didn’t answer her.
“We have to go to the principal’s office. You’re in trouble now.”
Bridget pulled Lilly out the front door and to the car.
Sister Mary Matthew, the principal, and Lilly’s teacher, Sister Mary John, were waiting for her. Lilly wanted to say I’m sorry, but she felt like her throat was frozen.
The principal spoke, “This time you’ve done it. This school has put up with all the nonsense from you we are going to.”
Sister Mary Matthew looked at Mrs. O’Dwyer. “We have tried to instill some decency in her. But she is incorrigible. She may finish the last four weeks, but she may not return in the fall.”
Sister turned her attention to Lilly. “These four weeks will be very unpleasant for you. During lunch, you will sit on the floor outside my office. No one will be allowed to speak to you at any time. I hope you know the word expelled will follow you around on your permanent record. Most good colleges would not even accept your application. Your job prospects will be less. You may never join the FBI. Mrs. O’Dwyer, she is your cross to bear. I will pray for you.”
Ann was serving dinner when they arrived home. Everyone stopped speaking. Lilly followed her mother to the study.
“How dare you! Where were you? Answer me.”
Lilly was silent. Bridget started shaking her again.
“How could you do this with all we are going through?”
Bri
dget shook harder, and then she started hitting Lilly. Brian and the twins were crying in the kitchen where they could hear the blows.
Patrick got up and went to the study.
“Mom! Stop!”
He pulled Bridget from Lilly.
Lilly was sitting on the floor. She got up and brushed past her mother and brother. She mounted the stairs with her head high.
Patrick asked, “Lil, are you OK?”
Lilly didn’t trust herself to speak, so she walked proudly to the bathroom. She washed her face and surveyed the damage. Her lip was split. And there was blood. The skin under her left eye was discolored. She was hoping for a big black eye. She thought her mother would feel guilty and get off her back. She was half right.
Tony was having a better evening. His father came to the service station. Tony was pouring oil, and he had two cars getting gas so didn’t see his father come in. He turned to finish changing the oil on a car in the mechanic’s bay, he stopped when he saw his father. He was embarrassed, by the awkwardness between them. Tito was carrying a pizza and a six-pack of soda. They walked into the office and started eating.
Tito spoke about the guys he worked with and asked Tony about school. Tony bragged about the repairs he was doing at the station, where the mechanic called him an apprentice. Tito went to the mechanic’s bay with him, and they talked.
Tito looked at the station clock at nine, and said, “I really got to get home. See you in a while, son.”
Tony walked him to his car.
“Tony, I love you son. You know that, huh?” Tito leaned on the car door.
Tony looked at his father and said, “Yeah, Pops. You’re the best.”
In the next few days, Tony thought of Lilly, wishing he hadn’t talked so freely to her. He wondered if he hadn’t seen her because she didn’t have a solution and didn’t want to face him. He was going to let her know it was OK, but he hadn’t seen her coming from her babysitting job.
The following Sunday after coming home from painting at the Esiason’s, Tony got the rest of the story.
The della Robbias were eating the Sunday feast when Tito said to Tony, “You can have your friend over to listen to records any time.”
“Mike?” Tony asked.
“No, the blonde. Lilly. She’s a nice girl. She’s got guts.”
“How do you know Lilly so well?”
A Yonkers Kinda Girl Page 4
