Colton suddenly felt tired. His muscles were sore, and the only thing he wanted was to get home, order pizza with Amy, and prop his feet up. He’d chosen to be with Theresa because things were light and easy between them. Sure, Theresa was prone to complaining, even before Amy had arrived in Jackson. But Theresa hadn’t been mean or accusatory.
Or maybe she had been. Maybe Colton hadn’t been paying enough attention to what Theresa was actually like.
Suddenly, he remembered something that Amy had told him at breakfast a few days ago when they discussed Mark—the jerk, as Colton loved to mentally refer to him. It’s easy for you, Colt. You’re always one foot in, one foot out with your women. You never let them close enough, so they can’t really hurt you. I wish I was more like you.
Theresa was still rambling on and on about Colton’s unacceptable behavior. Colton stood hearing her words without really listening to them. Only one thought twirled in his head. Am I a jerk to Theresa?
“Do you even love me, Colt?”
The question jarred him out of his soul-searching. He didn’t know how to answer. The way he behaved with Theresa was the same way he had behaved with all his past girlfriends. He’d never cheated on nor lied to any of them. But did he love her? He didn’t know.
“I’m not sure. It depends on what you define as love,” he mumbled.
“Okay, so what do you feel when you’re with me?” Theresa insisted.
Colton breathed in. It was the first time Theresa had put him on the spot. He used to think that his girlfriend was on the same page as him. That she was after the same thing that Colton was after—a casual but exclusive dating relationship. However, based on Theresa’s question and the emotion in her voice, this wasn’t the case.
Colton didn’t want to hurt Theresa, but he also didn’t want to start inventing things he didn’t feel. He cleared his throat. “We have fun together. I thought that was enough. For both of us. But if you want to know whether I’m ready to take our relationship to the next level, well … I’m not. I’m okay with what we have.”
Theresa sniffed. “If that’s your answer, I think we need to take a break, Colt.”
Wow, not what Colton had expected. Why did Theresa’s words make him feel more relieved than sad? To hide his inconsequential feelings, he asked, “Why? Do you think you love me?”
Theresa’s reply came without hesitation. “Sure. You’re the hottest fireman I could ever wish for. But I won’t be with you if you don’t love me.” She let out a dramatic sigh. “Goodbye, Colt. Call me only after you’ve realized what a mistake you’ve made and are ready to apologize.” With that, she cut the line.
Colton lowered his phone and lifted his gaze to the sky. It was a clear night. The Milky Way glistened visibly among the countless stars. Just like that night when his parents died.
Colton’s throat prickled. The memory of the incident wasn’t something he consciously thought about. Somehow, Theresa’s question, together with what Amy had told him, pushed his mind back to the horrors he’d witnessed.
Was it bad that he wasn’t ready to love a woman with all his being?
He’d loved his parents completely and unequivocally, and when they'd perished, it had almost killed Colton too. No. The way he approached relationships was healthy. Especially since he’d made a vow to prevent tragedies like the one he’d had to live through. His work was his life mission. Maybe he would never have a family of his own, but that was okay. Each day, he was saving many others.
His phone beeped. Had Theresa changed her mind? That was quick.
But when his eyes darted to the screen, it was Amy’s name that flashed. He answered. “Ames?”
“Hi, Colt. Are you off already? I’ve got a surprise for you. When are you coming home?”
The words sent warmth flooding into Colton’s chest. He hadn't realized it until now, but what he needed in this curious moment of self-doubt was to hear Amy’s voice. Somehow her sweet jingle soothed his soul’s troubles. The more he listened to her, the less the terrible events of the past hurt. “What surprise?” Colt asked, interest kindling inside him.
“You’ll see.” Amy giggled. “Just get home quickly.”
She closed the line on him just as Theresa had done, but this time Colton felt vastly different. He hurried to the driver’s side, opened the door, and hopped in. In a second, he was already driving home—home to Amy.
Wasn’t it strange that Amy knew exactly how to handle him? The two of them shared a commonality that could only come from growing up together and knowing one another so well.
He breathed in deeply, filling his lungs with so much air that his ribs felt like bursting. He let out everything, hoping that the deep exhalation would wipe his mind clean. He didn’t like where his thoughts were going.
The technique didn’t help. His brain was already reminiscing about the cute smile Amy had flashed him this morning when he'd prepared her breakfast cereal just the way she liked it, with roasted nuts and a hint of clove. He remembered the determined little wrinkle between her brows when she decided to push through something hard, like hanging onto the pull-up bar.
The next memory was the worst his mind could summon. When she'd fallen and Colton had reached to catch her—that moment had been haunting him. He refused to acknowledge why it set his heart pounding, but the realization was already lurking in the corners of his subconscious.
It wouldn’t take long for it to come out to the surface. Once it did, Colton didn’t know how he could ever send it back.
10
A smile spread over Amy’s face as she observed her brother and Colton patting each other on the back in Colton’s living room. When Colton had decided to run off in the middle of the afternoon to answer a call, she’d worried that he might be out the whole night and miss Zach. Maybe if she’d told Colton that her brother was coming for dinner, he would have ignored his pager for once. But she’d wanted to surprise Colton. Also, she didn’t want to prevent Colton from doing what he felt compelled to do. Luckily, Colton had made it back in time.
Colton and Zach clinked their glasses and laughed.
“To you, my friend, for taking in Amy! I know she’s a tough cookie to live with. I had to endure over eighteen years with her.” Zach winked at Amy.
She rolled her eyes and huffed. “Admit it, bro! You miss having me in your fancy New York penthouse, don’t you?”
Zach nodded. “You’re right. I miss Jackson, and I miss both of you. But I’m happy that you’re together so you can keep each other company.”
At least somebody is happy about it. Amy bit back her comment just in time.
Theresa's icy tone from earlier rang in her ears. Amy hadn’t yet found the time to tell Colton that his girlfriend had tried calling him on the landline. She had not been thrilled to get Amy instead. Theresa must have been bugging Colton about why Amy was still living at his place after three weeks in Jackson, even though Colton insisted that Theresa was still cool with it.
Maybe Theresa was right. Amy didn’t want to be the reason for Colton’s relationship to go haywire. But the last two houses she'd visited were full of cockroaches and smelled like bad cheese. She didn’t have a large enough budget to get a decent place on her own yet. She had to wait till her first paycheck was deposited.
Colton tapped Zach’s back. “I couldn’t be happier that Amy-cakes moved home and lives here. It feels like old times now—minus your snarky face, of course. I know you’re having a blast in the Big Apple. Good for you, Zachie!”
“Thanks, man,” Zach replied heartily.
Amy wondered if she should tell Colton about Theresa’s call, but the words got stuck in her throat. Did Colton just say he was glad that she’d moved back to Jackson and was living with him?
Amy was sure that she’d created a lot of trouble for him ever since she’d shown up. Even if she put aside the fact that she had practically invaded his house, there was still too much that Colton had done for her. He’d been playing chaperone whenever she wanted to go
out, claiming that she was no longer familiar with the town’s buzzing nightlife. When Amy stayed in, he stayed in with her so that she wouldn’t be alone. Now that she thought of it that way, it was no wonder why Theresa sounded so hostile with Amy on the phone.
Amy’s mind drifted back to the bench in Colton’s gym. Those kisses on her hands. Could it be that Colton was acting this nice to her because …?
Amy Powell, you stop this nonsense right now. Her father had used that phrase when he wanted to be firm, and it managed to kick Amy’s thoughts back to the present.
Amy had no business thinking about what Colton could perhaps feel for her in an alternate universe where she wasn’t his best friend, a universe where he wasn’t a firefighter and didn’t have a girlfriend. Plus, Colton did say that it felt like old times for him. Times when they were living as brother and sister. It would be a colossal mistake for Amy to project anything fluffy and romantic onto his brotherly actions.
Zach’s eyes wandered to the fireplace that stood in the left side of the living room. “I can’t believe you put that in. Aren’t you all about preventing fires? A fireplace is a number one risk for a massive disaster, isn’t it?”
Colton chuckled. “Not when it’s well-kept. Despite what you might think, watching fire—a contained small orange glow—calms me down. I don’t associate it with the devastating beast we combat at work.”
Amy nodded. “I also love to cozy up in front of the crackling sound and smell of burning wood. It makes me feel like Christmas in any season.”
Zach circled his finger beside his temple. “You both are nuts. You’d make a fun couple.”
Colton’s cheeks became bright red. His gaze, which had been interlocked with Amy’s in clear complicity, dropped to the floor.
Amy’s breath hitched.
Zach didn’t seem to notice the effect of his words. He ambled to the fridge, opening it. “Well, I think you can do whatever you like. It’s your house. At least if your house starts to burn, you’ll know what to do, right?” He bent toward the shelves as if looking for something. “Hey, man, are we out of soda?”
Colton scratched his head. “No. There’s still a box in the shed. I’ll go and get it.” He bolted to the door and disappeared.
Why did her brother need to say such an inappropriate thing? She and Colton, a couple? He had clearly embarrassed Colton, who would never even think of Amy in those terms. Amy crossed her arms and stepped over to her brother as he shut the fridge. She furrowed her brows and pressed her lips together.
Zach’s eyes widened. “Ames, what’s with you?”
“Zachie, didn’t you notice what a blunder you just made?”
“A blunder? Me? What the heck are you talking about?”
“Your comment, duh!” Amy opened her hands, but when her brother’s face remained confused, she added, “Me and Colt as a couple. That was uncalled for. You embarrassed him.”
Zach’s faced pulled into a mocking smirk. “No, I did not. Colt didn’t even notice it. Also, it was just a little insignificant …” He narrowed his eyes and bent closer to Amy. “Ames, why is your voice as high-pitched as Poppy’s when she’s lying? Did something happen between you and Colt?”
Amy cursed herself inwardly for addressing the topic. She should’ve just let it slide. Zach was probably right. Maybe Colton hadn’t gotten the same meaning as Amy had.
Zach’s face was now so close to Amy’s that their foreheads almost touched. Her brother’s brown eyes—the exact same shade that Amy saw every morning in the mirror—were boring through Amy like two laser beams. “Sis, is there something you’re not telling me?”
Why did I have to speak up? Fudge, fudge, and double fudge. “Nothing.” She shrugged, pulling back from her brother. “I was just pointing out that referring to me and Colt as a couple could be upsetting for Theresa. Colt’s girlfriend.”
Zach wrinkled his forehead, glancing at the ceiling. “Theresa …Theresa … ah yes, that tall brunette chick. The aspiring underwear supermodel.”
Amy swallowed the bile that surfaced. Colton had spoken to Zach about Theresa. He hadn’t told Amy anything, but if he’d told Zach, then Theresa was probably more important to him than she realized. “Yes, her,” Amy said tartly. “And it's bathing suits, not underwear.”
Zach shrugged. “Okay, I won’t refer to you and Colton as a couple.”
“Ever again,” Amy added quickly.
Zach’s lips twitched into a smile. “Ever again. But your zeal to make me promise this is suspicious. Are you getting your old flame for him again or what?”
“Whaaat?” she guffawed. If Amy’s jaw could have dropped to the floor, it would have shattered into tiny pieces. How did her brother know she had a … used to have a thing for Colt?
Zach hugged her shoulders. “Poppy and I once dated, you remember? It was in the summer after the prom. One day, she spilled the beans—you wanted to be Colt’s date to the prom. Admit it.”
Amy’s shoulders locked with anger. Poppy. Poppy! Amy had always known it was a mistake to allow her best friend to date her brother—even if their magical moment was over quickly. Obviously not quickly enough. Her friend still had time to tell Zach about Amy’s silly crush on Colton.
“So what?” she began. “Okay, so I wanted to ask Colt to the prom. But I decided not to. I realized it was a crazy moment. A moment of confusion on my part. You know, with Dad’s sickness and all, I was feeling vulnerable and probably wanted to have someone I could trust by my side.”
Zach lifted a brow as if he wasn't sure whether to believe Amy’s psychobabble.
Amy grabbed her brother’s hand. “Zach, it’s the truth. I have absolutely no feelings for Colt now other than pure friendship. Okay?”
Zach tilted his head and studied Amy. Then he sighed and caressed her cheek. “Ames, whatever you say. I wouldn’t mind if my two favorite people ended up together, but it’s okay if it doesn’t happen. Besides, I know your promise to Dad, and I doubt Colt would ever quit his job. So I think we’re all better off if you just remain friends.”
“Good, we’re all in agreement.” Amy forced her lips to move upwards into a weak smile for her brother.
Yet as she told herself that her crush on Colton was over, she realized how true that was—the crush was over, replaced by something else. The realization shook her to her core. There was only one explanation for Amy’s eagerness to discard every potential new apartment, for her illogical excitement to return home when her hospital shifts ended, and even for her masochistic promise to go back to Colton’s calisthenics class.
“Here are the drinks,” Colton announced as he stepped back in.
When Amy’s glance crossed over to him, her soul twisted with a jerk. Yes, the signs were clear as the sun. Amy was doomed!
11
“I want to try the driver’s seat too!” The chubby redhead with the polka-dotted pajamas raised her arms pleadingly to Colton.
He bent down and lifted the tiny girl into his arms. He carried her to the engine, where Rhett was demonstrating how the blinker worked to a boy with a large bandage over his forehead and left eye. “We have a new firewoman here, Rhett,” Colton said.
His colleague turned and flashed a grin at the child. “Huh, little doll. So you want to join our force too? That’s good. We need strong girls like you. Peter here has been learning how to drive. Do you want to check out how the water pump works while your friend plays at the wheel?”
The girl squealed. “Yes! Can you turn on the water too?”
“I wanna watch!”
“Me too!”
“Me too!”
The group of little patients who had been observing Drew unpack his paramedic equipment rushed over to Rhett and Colton.
Amy was behind them almost instantly. “Wait, kids. Let’s form a proper line so everyone can take a look.”
Colton watched as she tried to usher the excited children into a neat group. It had been a great idea of hers to request a firefighter prese
ntation for the hospital’s pediatric department. The little ones enjoyed exploring all there was to know about extinguishing a fire or intervening in an emergency situation.
And to think that Colton had accused Amy of flirting with the captain when she was just organizing this event for her patients.
Rhett patted Colton on the shoulder and said in a low voice, “Wanna wow the kids and impress your girl?”
Colton gritted his teeth. “Amy isn’t my girl, Rhett. And you know it.”
“Well, dumb of you,” Rhett murmured, wiggling his brows.
Colton’s eyes flicked to Amy to check whether she’d overheard the ill-suited comment. She was caressing the head of a boy with a plastered arm. Her eyes shone with so much affection that Colton’s insides brewed with the unmistakable longing he’d been trying to suppress for days now.
Amy is such a kind soul. And such a beautiful woman.
Darn it. Why couldn’t he have more control over his emotions? Colton didn’t so much as flinch when his stomach tightened. The sensation of shame was becoming a daily grind by now. He couldn’t look at Amy anymore without getting feelings for which he had to scold himself.
“Go ahead, Rhett. You need to practice your presentation more than I do,” Colton snapped at the new firefighter, hoping his provocation would stop Rhett from insinuating anything further.
Colton had already told his buddies that he and Amy were just friends, but the teasing in the station hadn’t stopped since Amy had visited them with those delicious muffins. Especially after Colton had announced that he wouldn’t be going to the award banquet with Theresa.
Rhett knew how to accept a challenge. He stepped closer to the vehicle and cleared his throat. “Attention, kiddos. We’re going to check out the mysterious heart of the tanker now. It’s called the impeller water pump. Do any of you know where it might be located?”
The children stared blankly at one other, then shook their heads.
Even Peter climbed down from the driver seat and came to stand in front of Rhett and Colton. “Where is it, Rhett?”
Saving His Heart Page 8
