“I’m sorry. You’re right. You’re not a dirty secret. You’re carrying a Steele grandchild. It’s not an ideal situation, but it’s not the end of the world, either. I just wish I wasn’t in China right now. There’s only so much I can do from here. But I’m going to talk to my parents. I’ll tell them everything tonight and I’m sure they’ll be eager to meet you as soon as they can.”
“You want me to meet your parents? Without you?”
“Yeah, sure. You’ll be fine. You’ll get to know everyone and by the time I get back stateside, I’m sure you’ll feel better about having a family that accepts our child as one of their own.”
That was nice, but that wasn’t exactly what she had in mind. “I was actually thinking of something a little bit more legally binding on the family front, Finn.”
“I can assure you that the offer my attorneys sent you is the best for everyone, Kat.”
“Not for me, Finn. I want to get—”
“You don’t want to marry me,” he interrupted.
Kat was stunned into momentary silence by his abrupt response. She was expecting him to give her a reason why he couldn’t or wouldn’t marry her, not the other way around. “I don’t?”
“No. Listen, you’ve spoken to my brother. I’m sure he was all too eager to tell you about all my flaws. He revels in them.”
“I’m not concerned with your flaws,” Kat argued.
“You should be. There’s a lot of them. I know that in your head getting married and raising this family together is the practical, responsible thing to do. But I am neither practical nor responsible. Ask anyone who has ever met me. Marrying me would...not be the fantasy you have in your mind.”
She could hear Finn sigh on the other end of the line before he continued. “This isn’t the old days where we have to marry to cover up the fact that we sinned together. I doubt many happy marriages resulted from that practice back then, and it wouldn’t result in a happy marriage now. If I thought that I would be a good husband and father, I would get down on one knee the moment I saw you again. But I can’t offer what I don’t have. What I can offer you is support, and my last name for our child. He or she will be a Steele, and will be raised as such. You can meet my family and be as involved with them as you’d like. But believe me when I say you don’t want to compound this mistake with marriage.”
It was a good argument. And Finn sold it well. And if marriage hadn’t been such a firm fixture in Kat’s mind since she was a small child, she might even be swayed by his words. But what Finn didn’t understand, what none of them understood, was what it was like to grow up with parents who weren’t married. It wasn’t the fifties then, and it still made her feel different. As though she wasn’t good enough. Kat never wanted her child to feel like that. Especially just because the father was being selfish.
“Are you sure you’re not just saying all this because you don’t want to get married?” she countered.
“Of course I don’t want to get married!” he shouted over the line. “That’s one of the reasons I’ll be so terrible at being a husband. Kat, I am not the marrying kind of guy. I’ve never even considered the possibility. I love the ladies too much to pick one for the rest of my life. I’ve always known this about myself, and that’s why I’ve always tried to be very careful where contraception was concerned. I never wanted to put myself or a woman in this position, and until now I’ve been successful. I don’t know why it happened this time, but I can’t change it, or me. I’m saying this for your sake, for our child’s sake and for my own sake. None of us will be happy if we get married.”
“Let’s table that discussion for now,” Kat said. “What about being a father? Let’s set aside talk of child support and trust funds and discuss what being a father really means to you. Do you intend to be involved?”
“Absolutely. I believe my lawyer submitted a request for visitation every other weekend, alternate holidays and a week during the summer. That seemed to be pretty standard.”
Kat sighed. “And what about the rest of the time? What about school plays and ball games? Recitals, science projects? Playing in the park? Sitting up with him or her all night when our child has a fever and can’t get comfortable?”
“To be honest, I didn’t expect you to want me to be that involved. I’m willing to do as much or as little as is needed. I work long hours, and travel a lot, too. I may not be able to make every after-school game and class party. But if you really need me to be there, I will do what I can.”
At this point, his words felt like a win to Kat. It wasn’t all that she wanted, but it was a big step for their first talk. Maybe once he returned home from China, they could spend more time together. There was still a chance he might change his mind and want to be more involved in not only their child’s life, but hers, too. She wouldn’t give up hope yet.
“Look over the paperwork, Kat. It doesn’t cover everything, but it does cover a lot. We can talk about it more in a few days. In the meantime, I’m going to talk to my parents. Keep an eye out for a mushroom cloud over Mount Pleasant. I’ll talk to you soon.”
Kat hung up the phone and leaned her head against the back of the seat. After everything that had happened the last few days with Sawyer and now with Finn, she was emotionally and physically exhausted. It didn’t take much lately. The tiny human inside her seemed to sap her of any energy she might have. She wasn’t sure how she was going to handle it when the baby got bigger, or worse, after it was born and mobile.
The idea of having a child alone was terrifying. It was a thought she hadn’t really allowed herself to entertain. Every time the scary what-ifs crept into her mind, she would tell herself that Finn would marry her and they would be one big, happy family. But was she just lying to herself? If she accepted the fact that she was doing this on her own, would she be better prepared to face the eventuality?
Kat glanced down at the legal papers she’d set aside. Finn’s attorneys had promised her a great deal of security. As much as money could buy. That was something. But Finn’s money wouldn’t hold her at night or get up and change the baby at 2:00 a.m. when she was too exhausted to get out of bed.
She tried to picture Finn doing just that. She could see him in a pair of boxer shorts, clutching a small baby to his chest. Both he and the infant had the same golden-blond curls as he bent to kiss the baby on the top of the head. It was a touching image. One that nearly made her tear up at the thought. But as she let the fantasy play out in her mind, she knew one thing was different in this scenario.
It wasn’t Finn holding her baby in her mind.
It was Sawyer.
* * *
Sawyer stood awkwardly on Kat’s doorstep, holding a large box with a bow on it. He’d gotten the address from Finn’s attorneys, but it felt weird to stand here on the piazza steps of her home with a gift. Unannounced. Like he was asking her to the prom or something. He suppressed that comparison lest the image of her in a slinky beaded dress completely derail why he was here today.
This visit wasn’t about his brother. Or the District. Or his undeniable urge to see her again. And kiss her again. No. It was about his family.
He rang the doorbell, stopping to admire the intricate engravings on the front door. The edges were done in a Celtic knot design that ran all the way around, with leaves, acorns, chipmunks and other woodland creatures carved into the dark wood. It was incredible, and no doubt one of her pieces.
Kat opened the door, a look of confusion wrinkling her nose as she eyed him and the box in his arms. “Sawyer? What are you doing here?”
Considering he hadn’t seen her since they kissed in her workshop and now he was at her home without prior warning, that was a valid question. To be honest, he hadn’t called ahead because he thought she might tell him not to come. That was the smart thing to do. Let the lawyers handle the situation and stay far from the temptation of Kat McIntyre. And yet here
he was, on a mission he’d volunteered for.
“I’m here today on official Steele family business,” he said. At least that might ease any concerns she could have about him being here for less than altruistic reasons. He wasn’t at her home to kiss her again. Although he’d have a hard time turning her down if she wanted him to. Kat was apparently the Achilles’ heel he never knew he had until their lips touched that afternoon at the District. Since then, he’d thought of little else.
“What official business is that?” She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against the door frame.
“Well, news of you and the baby has spread to the immediate family.” Sawyer hadn’t been at the house the night Finn called, so had heard the tale secondhand from Lena, their housekeeper. Apparently, they’d had to call the doctor, because his father had turned bright red as his blood pressure went through the roof. Sawyer wouldn’t tell Kat that, though.
“Everyone is very excited to meet you and they don’t want to wait until Finn gets home, so my parents have asked me to invite you to a little thing they’re putting on this weekend at the house.”
“A little thing?”
Sawyer knew well enough that nothing his parents ever did could be described as little. Perhaps in their mind a garden party for a hundred of their closest friends was an intimate get-together, but normal people knew better. “My grandmother is coming home. She’s spent the last three years traveling around Europe after my grandfather passed away. I guess she finally got tired of Paris and has decided to come back to Charleston. They’re throwing a welcome-home party for her Saturday afternoon and they’d like you to come.”
He could tell by the look on Kat’s face that she wasn’t excited by the invitation. Some people dreamed of being invited to a Steele party. But some people weren’t carrying the illegitimate child of the family’s problem son. He imagined that, for someone in her position, a party like that would be akin to being dropped in a shark tank wearing a chum bikini. This might take some convincing.
“Can I come in?”
Kat nodded and stepped back to allow him up the stairs and inside the piazza. He followed her into the house, and as she shut the door and turned to face him, he held out the large box to her. “This is for you.”
“What is it?” she asked cautiously.
Sawyer shrugged. “I think it’s a dress. It’s from my sister Jade, so I’m not entirely certain. She just told me to give it to you.”
Kat accepted the box, but the line between her brows deepened with thought as she eyed the sizable package. “Why would she give me a dress? Or anything at all for that matter? We’ve never even met before.”
“Well, that’s true, but Jade is technically new to the family, too. I don’t know if you follow the news, but she and my sister Morgan were switched at birth as part of some kidnapping and ransom scheme. Jade is my biological sister, but no one knew it until recently. When she heard about your situation, she told me she wanted to help out. She knows what it’s like to walk into a room of Steeles as a stranger.”
Kat carried the box over to the coffee table. “That’s sweet of her. But why a dress? I have clothes. Is she worried I’m going to show up to this thing in cutoffs and flip-flops?”
“No, of course not. But she knows you’re expecting. And I mentioned how you’d complained about your nice clothes not fitting at Morgan’s wedding. Really, I don’t know why. I didn’t ask. She just gave me a box. It’s her way of welcoming you to the family, I guess.”
“I suppose I should be happy that someone is welcoming me,” Kat muttered, as she opened the lid to expose the tissue-wrapped outfit inside.
It was coral-colored lace, and when she held it up, Sawyer could see why his sister had chosen it. It would flatter Kat’s new curves nicely with its high waist, plunging V-neckline, and hem that would fall just above her knee. Her shapely calves would be on display all afternoon, and he couldn’t complain about that. He was undoubtedly a leg man.
“This is beautiful,” she said. “And just the right size. How did she know?”
He shrugged. He wouldn’t even begin to guess what size a woman wore. It was a losing game for a man anyway, so he chose not to play. “She saw you hit me at the wedding reception and took a guess. She has an eye for clothes.”
“I’ll have to tell her thank-you when I see her at the party.” Kat folded the dress and placed it neatly back inside the box.
“So you’re coming?”
Kat sighed and sat back on her sofa. “I don’t suppose I can say no or I’ll be starting off on the wrong foot with Finn’s family. Your family,” she added, with a wistful look in her eye he didn’t understand. “I wish it wasn’t such a big, public spectacle, though.”
“That’s better, really.” Sawyer sat on the sofa beside her. “There will be a lot of people there and the focus won’t be on you. It will be on Grandma Ingrid. You’ll be able to mingle and meet people, but you won’t be trapped in the dining room with the immediate family grilling you over dinner.”
Sawyer had been witness to one such family dinner in recent memory. His older brother, Tom, had brought home a woman to meet the family. He’d seriously been considering proposing to her. But watching her melt to a puddle under the scrutiny had changed his brother’s mind. If she couldn’t handle dinner, she couldn’t handle being a Steele.
“Okay, I guess. What time?”
“Three o’clock at the house.”
Kat nodded and picked up her phone to put the information into her digital calendar. “Is there anything else I should know?” she asked.
“I’d recommend wearing shoes that won’t sink into the lawn. And wear some good sunscreen and insect repellant. My parents have the yard sprayed, but it’s still summer in Charleston.”
Kat smiled and shook her head. “Thanks, but that’s not exactly what I meant.”
He was afraid of that. “What do you want to know?” he asked. “I’ll answer you as honestly as I’m able to.”
“Your parents... Finn told me he was going to tell them. Are they okay with this? I can’t imagine they took the news well.”
Sawyer sighed. “They didn’t. At least at first. My family has always been very focused on their public image. They’re getting better, though. I think my father has finally come to terms with the fact that we are all adults now, and the more he meddles in our lives, the worse it can make things.”
Kat’s lower lip trembled just slightly as she turned away and looked at the dress on the table. “So they hate me,” she said matter-of-factly.
Sawyer wanted to reach out to her. To brush his thumb across her lip and kiss her until she forgot about his parents and what they might think. In the end, that mattered very little. Not as much as seeing her smile again. He compromised with himself and instead reached out to place a comforting hand on her denim-clad knee. “No. They don’t hate you, Kat. They don’t know you. But they want to get to know you and see what kind of person you are.”
“They may not hate me, but they blame me for this. They think I’m just after their money and their name.”
“Again, they don’t know you. I’m sure they have their concerns, but they’re polite enough not to confront you with them. Their future grandchild is at stake. They want to like you, I promise. Honestly, in this situation they blame Finn. I’m sure they’re surprised it’s taken this long for something like this to happen.”
The frown line returned between her brows. It seemed to whenever he spoke about his brother. He understood her concern. She hadn’t said anything to him about Finn, but he could tell that his twin’s reputation bothered her. One night together wasn’t enough time to decide if someone is going to be a good parent or partner.
“Just be yourself, Kat. Come and meet everyone. It will be fine. You’ll get through Saturday and I’m sure it will be easier after that. My family isn’t that scary.”
“You’re pretty scary.” Kat gave him a shady bit of side eye and a knowing smirk as she said the words. It was enough to make him pull away his hand.
“I am. As you will soon learn, Morgan is the princess, Tom’s the golden boy, Finn’s the fuck-up and I’m the hard-ass.” Sawyer stood and shoved his hands into his pockets. “Welcome to the family, Kat.”
Five
The second time Kat drove up to the Steele mansion, the circumstances were very different. It had been only a few weeks and the live oak–lined drive with its dripping Spanish moss was just the same, but this time she had been invited. And hopefully, she wouldn’t cause a scene.
There were already a lot of cars parked in the field when she pulled up and handed the keys of her Jeep to the valet. Another man directed her down a path along the side of the house to the backyard. She could hear a string quartet playing and the melody of voices and laughter in the distance.
But it wasn’t until she rounded the corner of the house and caught a glimpse of the party that the wave of nerves hit her. She wasn’t sure how many people she was expecting, but this was hardly a little thing Sawyer had invited her to. The event sprawled across the manicured lawn behind the house. A huge, white tent covered a portion of the tables and she could see a large buffet laid out in the shade.
There were more than a hundred people milling around in their garden party finery and flashy hats, with almost as many staff in white tuxedos catering to their every need.
As she stood at the edge of the crowd, trying to force herself to officially enter, one of the staff approached her with a tray of crystal flutes. “Would you care for some champagne, miss?”
Kat stopped herself from reaching out on impulse and dropped her hand to her stomach instead. Her baby belly was still little more than a bump, but the gown Jade had bought her for the party highlighted what she did have. “I’m not drinking.”
From Seduction to Secrets Page 5
