VIOLET: Okay. But how is getting so upset about it going to help?
CATHY: (more calmly) Vi. Please. Will you please just let me in?
VIOLET: Well, there you go. (starting to the door) Just asking nicely changes the whole situation.
VIOLET unlocks and opens the door. CATHY, in her late thirties, enters and follows VIOLET back to her couch.
CATHY: Vi. What are you …?
VIOLET sits down.
CATHY: No, no, don’t do that. We have to leave. They’re evacuating the building.
VIOLET: Why?
CATHY: Because there’s a fire!
VIOLET: Well, that’s not my fault. Check the stove yourself if you don’t believe me.
CATHY: Violet. Please listen to me.
VIOLET: I am. I am listening to you.
The sirens stop.
VIOLET: Well, there you go. It’s all over, whatever it was. You can leave now.
CATHY: Did you take your medication this morning?
VIOLET: Of course.
CATHY: Are you sure?
VIOLET: Absolutely.
CATHY: Can I see the pill bottle?
VIOLET: Why? Do you think I’m lying?
CATHY: No, I think you might be mistaken.
VIOLET: Well, even if I am, how could you tell?
CATHY: You mean other than from your behaviour?
VIOLET: Whatever that means. It’s not like you count the pills, is it? Or do you? Do you come here every day and count my pills?
CATHY heads for the bathroom.
VIOLET: It’s not in there.
Sounds of CATHY going through the medicine chest.
VIOLET: I said, it’s not in there!
CATHY comes out of the bathroom.
CATHY: So where is it then?
VIOLET: I’m not sure. But it’s definitely not in the bathroom. I keep it separate.
CATHY: Separate from what?
VIOLET: From all the things that don’t hurt me.
CATHY: Your medication doesn’t hurt you.
VIOLET: That’s what you think, is it? Do you want to try it sometime?
CATHY: Tell me where your medication is, or I’m taking you back to the hospital.
VIOLET: You’ll have to say that again. You didn’t phrase it right.
CATHY: Sorry?
VIOLET: You’re not supposed to say things that imply that you have control over me. Instead of saying “I’m taking you,” you should have said “We’re going” … You know, like it’s my idea, too. You’re supposed to know better, Cathy. You’re not all that new at this.
CATHY: No. I’m not. And you’re right. So tell me where you keep your medication, or we’re going back to the hospital.
VIOLET: On whose authority?
CATHY: Mine.
VIOLET: There you go again. We both know you can’t initiate that action without getting authorization from your superiors.
CATHY: And who are they?
VIOLET: That team of doctors who’ve been running my life for several years now.
CATHY: They’re not my superiors. We’re a team.
VIOLET: Sure you are. You know, Cathy, sometimes you talk to me like you think I’m not very smart.
CATHY: I know you’re smart, Vi. Believe me.
VIOLET: I taught school for twenty years. English literature. Dickens. Shakespeare. Ask me any question you want about the works of Jane Austen.
CATHY: You’re not going to distract me, Vi. Making sure you take your medication is an important part of my job so –
VIOLET: Still on about that, are you?
CATHY: (sitting next to her) Have you stopped taking it all together? Or have you just cut back? (off her blank stare) Violet?
VIOLET: Cut back.
CATHY:To what? Every second day?
VIOLET: Something like that.
CATHY: Meaning?
VIOLET: Occasionally.
CATHY: (exasperated now) Which is?
VIOLET: When I think I need it, okay? I take a goddamn pill when I think I need one.
CATHY: And what determines that? What is it that makes you think it might be a good idea for you to take one of your pills?
VIOLET: When I think I might be losing touch with reality.
CATHY: Okay. Give me an example of when that happened.
VIOLET: I can’t remember one at the moment. It hasn’t happened for a while.
CATHY: It just did. Sirens were blaring down on the street. The building’s fire alarm was going off. And you just checked your stove.
VIOLET: What else should I have done?
CATHY: Remember all those safety procedures we went over when I first moved you in?
VIOLET: You mean when you helped me move in.
CATHY: Yes. Sorry. When I helped you move in, we went through a list of things to do when the fire alarm sounds. The first and most important one is that you go to a stairwell and … get the hell out of the building!
VIOLET: Shhh. Too much. Too upset. Too loud.
CATHY: You’re right. Sorry. But do you remember me telling you that? If the fire alarm goes off, you leave.
VIOLET: Yes. I do remember. I know I should do that. But I have … I have …
CATHY: You have what?
VIOLET: Well, you’re the expert, so you know what I have. Or hasn’t this come up?
CATHY: Hasn’t what come up?
VIOLET: The problem I have with leaving the building.
CATHY: You’re always allowed to leave it if it’s on fire.
VIOLET: That’s not the problem I’m referring to. I’m talking about the problem I’ve developed recently with it.
CATHY: How recently?
VIOLET: Well, a few minutes ago apparently. I mean leaving the apartment is hard enough. Just getting to the garbage chute … But when I heard all that noise –
CATHY: That noise being the alarm and the sirens.
VIOLET: Which was still noise, so I don’t understand your need to interrupt me just so you could say that again.
CATHY: Okay. I get that. So you heard all that … noise and …
VIOLET: And I knew I’d be required to leave the building. That’s when it hit me that I had a serious issue with doing that.
CATHY: Okay.
VIOLET: Which I suppose is something else we have to “deal” with now.
CATHY: Yes. Right. But in the meantime you can probably deal with it yourself.
VIOLET: Myself? Really?
CATHY: To some extent, yes. With some help from your meds.
VIOLET: Well, that’s new. Are you saying I won’t have to have a meeting with my doctors for a re-evaluation?
CATHY: I’m saying it will be easier if you’re on your meds. And I’m also saying that even if it isn’t easier or easy enough, it’s still something you have to make yourself overcome in an emergency.
VIOLET: Wow. Well, as they used to say on the commune, “That’s some heavy shit.”
CATHY: What commune? When were you were on a commune? In your teens? For how long?
VIOLET: Long enough to experience some of the things being offered in an alternative lifestyle.
CATHY: What’s that mean? Did you take drugs when you were there? Did you ever take LSD, Violet? Because there are numerous studies tying schizophrenia to –
VIOLET: Relax. I was messing with you. I’ve never been anywhere near a commune. And by the way, doctors have been asking me for years if I ever took LSD. So I know all about those “studies.” Kettle’s boiling.
VIOLET starts back to the kitchen.
CATHY: I need a key to your apartment.
VIOLET: (from the kitchen) No you don’t.
VIOLET finds the kettle off.
CATHY: If you’re going to stay here, yes I do. I want you to give me a key, so I can get a copy made.
VIOLET: How about if I promise to leave every time that stupid alarm goes off … (exiting kitchen) … which is sometimes five times a day because a few of the teenagers in here are thoughtless i
diots.
CATHY: People do.
VIOLET: People do what?
CATHY: They leave. When they hear the alarm and the fire engines, they leave the building.
VIOLET: Every time?
CATHY: Jesus weeps. Yes! Every time.
VIOLET: (shrugging) Okay. If that’s the way they choose to lead their lives, but I –
CATHY: I’m getting your key copied.
VIOLET: I think that’s a contravention of my legal and constitutional rights.
CATHY: It’s not actually. You have almost no rights now.
VIOLET: How can that be true?
CATHY: We’ve been over this several times. The court found you not criminally responsible but also still a potential danger to society. And that means –
VIOLET: I’ve got you in my life forever.
CATHY: It … means you are to be monitored closely, and you are required to be on medication until such time as you are –
VIOLET: Dead.
CATHY: No. Ready.
VIOLET: Ready to die.
CATHY: No, ready … and capable of showing us that –
VIOLET: I can make my own decisions? But I can’t, can I? Not really. I can’t be who I want to be. Live where I want to live. Decide not to put certain substances into my body. None of those things. And all because of what? Something I’ve done in the past.
CATHY: And you know what that was, don’t you? You haven’t forgotten.
VIOLET: Of course not. And I had very good reasons for taking that action, as you well know. Reasons that were never given the weight they deserved by your precious court.
CATHY: I know you think that but –
VIOLET: Well, would you kill your husband and your brother-in-law without having a reason to justify what you’d done?
CATHY: I need your key.
They look at each other.
CATHY: I mean it, Vi. I need it.
VIOLET: Okay …
VIOLET takes a key on a chain from around her neck and hands it to CATHY.
CATHY: Just promise me you won’t abuse the privilege.
CATHY smiles, then leaves. VIOLET seems very worried. She starts to move in a circle.
Blackout.
SCENE 2
VIOLET’s daughter MADDY, in her late twenties, is looking around the apartment. VIOLET is in the kitchen.
VIOLET: (from the kitchen) I control what I can control. I control my stove, so I won’t start a fire in here. (exiting the kitchen with a spray cleaner and a sponge) I control the water temperature in my shower so I don’t scald myself. I check my thermostat to maintain a moderate temperature in my environment at all times. If I spill a substance on the floor, I clean it up so I don’t slip, fall, and break a bone. (returning to the kitchen) What happens outside my living area I have no control over, so I try not to worry about it. There are people outside my living area who do dangerous things. There are people out in the world who are harming us in ways we can’t even fathom. (exiting the kitchen) I’ve tried in the past to fight against those people and those things, but that caused me great pain and uncertainty and also a loss of my freedom. So I checked my stove and I think that should be the end of my responsibilities in that matter.
MADDY: Are you eating?
VIOLET: No, I’m cleaning.
MADDY: I mean, when you eat … do you eat well?
VIOLET: (from the kitchen) Are you asking if I eat salads? (exiting the kitchen) Why would I start now? You know, some people think that salads are only suitable for cows. Creatures that have four stomachs. Because you need at least four stomachs to digest that stuff properly. Just like you’d need for grass.
MADDY: Mum?
VIOLET: Yes, darling?
MADDY: Knock it off. Just tell me what you eat, okay?
VIOLET: I’ll make you a list if it makes you feel better. A list of all the food I eat. Plus whatever garbage has been added to that food. Everything that I consume and how often I consume it.
MADDY: I’m just worried about you.
VIOLET: Are you? Well, maybe you could find another way to show it besides talking to me like I’m a child.
VIOLET comes out of the kitchen with a plate of Oreo cookies. Stacked very high.
MADDY: What’s that?
VIOLET: Lunch.
MADDY: Okay. Good.
MADDY picks up a cookie.
VIOLET: Oreos. Lunch is just Oreos.
MADDY: Right. My favourite.
MADDY bites into a cookie.
MADDY: Mum?
VIOLET: What?
MADDY: Aren’t you going to join me for lunch?
VIOLET: No.
MADDY: Why not?
VIOLET: (grabbing the plate of cookies) Because it was a joke for Chrissake! And you know that, so why did you have to ruin it?
She takes the Oreos back to the kitchen.
VIOLET: As if, even on my worst day, I’d serve my daughter a plate of Oreo cookies for lunch. I was just trying to scare you into thinking I’d totally lost it.
MADDY: So it wasn’t actually a joke then?
VIOLET: Well, it would have been if you’d laughed.
MADDY: The last time I was here you made me a grilled cheese sandwich without any cheese in it. Was that a joke too?
VIOLET: Might have been. Is that why you disappeared for all that time? You didn’t like me making jokes about my possible –
MADDY: I didn’t disappear. I just needed a –
VIOLET: You disappeared from my life. That’s my point. Okay, you don’t want to talk about it. So let’s get back to the most important thing.
MADDY: And what’s that?
VIOLET: My sense of humour. You know, a fairly severe bipolar disorder, or even schizophrenia, or whatever it is I’m supposed to have, does not vanquish a person’s sense of humour. I mean, not necessarily. Or not entirely. In fact, it can even enhance it. I could make you some soup, but it will have to be out of a can. I can only offer you what’s brought to me by my “psychiatric” social worker. She’s not much on nutrition for some reason, and I’m not allowed to go shopping.
MADDY: Not allowed by whom?
VIOLET: Myself mostly. I don’t trust my ability to cope in the stressful environment of a supermarket. I seem to remember that you have a similar problem.
MADDY: I got over it.
VIOLET: Really? How?
MADDY: I only go shopping when I’m drunk now.
VIOLET: Was that a joke?
MADDY: Yeah.
VIOLET: Well it wasn’t funny.
MADDY: Okay. So now you know how it feels. How about that smaller store near here?
VIOLET: Oh no. I tried going there when I first moved in. It’s run by an older Korean woman.
MADDY: You don’t like Koreans?
VIOLET: I love Koreans. My favourite student was Korean. It’s just that the woman in the store didn’t understand my questions.
MADDY: Well maybe next time don’t ask her any.
VIOLET: My questions weren’t frivolous, Maddy. I didn’t know where all the items I needed were.
MADDY: It’s a very small store, Mum. Maybe next time just look a little harder.
VIOLET: And if that doesn’t work? You see my point? Shopping, no matter where you do it, can be very unsettling.
MADDY: Not if you keep a flask of vodka in your bag.
VIOLET: I’m starting to think you’re not joking about that at all.
MADDY: It’s okay, Mum. I go to meetings, I’ve got a sponsor. I’ve got it under control.
VIOLET: Are you sure about that, honey?
MADDY: No. But here’s the thing. I don’t know if I can ever actually be honest with you. You know, tell you about what’s really going on with me like I used to … and not always treat you like you’re …
VIOLET: Crazy.
MADDY: Sensitive.
VIOLET: Sensitive to the point of being crazy. Anyway, we’re working on that. My sensitivity. My shopping anxiety … not allowing myself to leave the a
partment. Cathy and I have plans.
MADDY: What kind of plans?
VIOLET: Big ones. Well, hers are big. Mine are more modest. It all comes down to proper management of my medication. Too much and I might as well be in a coma. Too little and, well, things get …
MADDY: Dangerous?
VIOLET: Adventurous. How are the kids?
MADDY: They’re good.
VIOLET: Can you bring them by sometime?
MADDY: We’re talking about that.
VIOLET: Yes, of course. Dennis should have a say.
MADDY: Right. But I meant Cathy and I are talking about it.
VIOLET: Cathy has a say about whether or not I can see my grandchildren?
MADDY: Yeah. She does, Mum. I think you know that.
VIOLET: Sure. Well, she certainly has her hand firmly on every part of my existence, doesn’t she? So, how far along are you and Cathy in terms of making that decision?
MADDY: I’m not sure. The kids want to see you, so that’s not an issue.
VIOLET: I miss them. It breaks my heart not seeing them. I could show you what it’s doing to me, you know. I’m holding myself together right now because I don’t want to scare you by demonstrating how it’s actually affecting me.
MADDY: I know how it’s affecting you, Mum!
VIOLET: Oh you think so, do you? (pulling a handful of hair from her head) Look at this! This is a symptom of heartbreak and disappointment!!
She reaches for her hair again. MADDY grabs her arm.
MADDY: Mum! Please! I get it!
VIOLET: Good.
They look at each other.
VIOLET: That’s good …
MADDY: Yeah. But we can’t just ignore what Cathy –
VIOLET: How does Dennis feel about it?
MADDY: Dennis …?
VIOLET: Your husband.
MADDY: Yeah … Well he’s for it, I think. But he’s not really good at making these kinds of decisions so –
VIOLET: Don’t disparage him now! I know you can’t help yourself, but it’s not good for me to hear how bitter you’ve become about him.
MADDY: I was only trying to tell you that he sometimes can’t –
VIOLET: I love him! I love the kind of father he’s become. Especially considering his dismal family background. And I love that he supports your career even when you’re not fully applying yourself.
People Live Here Page 6
