by Sharon Sala
The coach swayed again, this time sending a fresh cloud of boiling dust in beneath the window curtains, which only added to the heat and misery of the ride. Eulis licked his lips and thought how tasty a shot of whiskey would be about now, but not to get drunk—just a sip to settle his nerves.
He caught Letty staring at him and reached for his bible. Sometimes she was just plain scary. If he hadn’t known better, he would have sworn she’d just read his mind. Then he thought again, if she was such a damned good mind reader, she would know that he’d just been thinking about a drink. He wouldn’t really take one—not even if it was offered to him free. He had a reputation to uphold and preaching and drinking didn’t mix.
He’d quickly learned that he liked the high he got from preaching more than he did the hangover on the morning after, so Letty could just wipe that frown off her face right now before it stuck there.
Confident of his purpose in life, he nodded at the two men facing them, manly ignoring the state of the air and opened his bible, although with the dip and sway of the coach, he couldn’t focus enough on the words to make many of them out. And so the journey continued, always bearing west, hoping to outrun nightfall to the next way station.
Forney Calder had been working for Gibson Stage Lines for almost two years. Most of the time he was satisfied with his lot in life. The only thing he really minded was lack of female companionship. In fact, he’d been suffering from the lack for some months now and had toyed with the idea of giving notice. But if he did that, he would forfeit his back pay. Come October, he would be forty-five years old—or forty-six. He never could remember for sure because his mother hadn’t been certain of the year he was born. Either way, he’d come to like the comfort of a roof and a bed too much, to willingly go back to a bedroll on the hard ground.
He stabbed the pitchfork into the hay and tossed a fork full over the fence into the corral. The horses crowded toward the feed, pushing and nipping at each other in an effort to get the first bite.
“Get back you miserable hay burners. There’s plenty for ever’one,” Forney yelled.
He tossed a little more hay into the corral then drew some water for the water trough. Once his chores were done, he went inside the station to give the stew a quick stir. It had been cooking all afternoon and there was a stage due before night. At least he’d have some human conversation to look forward to.
Only now and then did he start wondering what it would be like if things were different. He needed a new pair of shoes, but he hadn’t been paid in two months and didn’t figure he’d be buying anything anytime soon. Even if he had the price of the shoes, he could hardly saddle up and ride off to Ft. Mays to buy them. It was a two day ride and there would be no one left here to tend to the horses or meet the arriving stagecoaches. Until something changed, he was stuck at the way station with holes in his soles, and nothing but dreams of womanly flesh to soothe his manly needs.
A few hours later, the stew was in the warming oven and Forney was humped over the table near the lamplight, trying to cut a piece of old saddle leather to fit inside his right shoe. When he heard the familiar sound of the approaching stagecoach and the thunder of horses’ hooves, he tossed the leather aside and got up. It was about time they got here. He moved the stew from the warming oven to the front of the cook stove, lit a lantern, and headed for the door.
As always, dust boiled up into the air as the weary horses came to a stop.
Shorty the Stagecoach Driver, tossed the reins to Forney as Big Bill, the man riding shotgun, began climbing down. Once down on the ground, Big Bill dropped a step stool in front of the door and opened it wide.
Letty leaned out and whispered something near his ear. Big Bill nodded politely, then turned around and yelled at Forney.
“Hey, Forney, you better have some grub and a lot of it. I’m hungry as a bear and not particular of what I eat… and Sister Leticia needs the facilities.”
“Yeah, yeah, Big Bill, I’ve heard it all before. Stew’s inside and you know damn good and well the facilities are behind the station.”
“We need a lantern,” Big Bill said.
Forney handed him the one he was holding and started to unhitch the team when a flash of color caught his eye. He stopped, and when he saw a small foot, a hint of slender ankle, then the blue fabric of the female passenger’s dress, his jaw went slack. A few moments later he got an even better look at the woman Big Bill referred to as Sister Leticia. A drop of spittle slid out the corner of his mouth as he watched her brushing dust from her skirt.
Lord have mercy. Sister Leticia was a looker.
He dropped the reins and yanked the lantern out of Big Bill’s hands.
“Ma’am, you might best take my arm so as you don’t stumble. I’ll be happy to show you the way,” Forney said.
Letty hesitated then glanced toward Eulis, who was completely oblivious to the improprieties of her being escorted to an outhouse by a total stranger.
“Um… I don’t think… uh, Brother Howe will…”
At that point, Eulis looked up, noticed that a rather grimy, bearded man had hold of Letty’s arm with no signs of letting go.
“I say here… what’s going on?”
Forney frowned. He hadn’t noticed the dandy in the bowler hat.
“Ain’t nothin’ goin’ on, mister, ’cept that I’m gonna take this lady here to the outhouse.”
“It’s Reverend… not Mister,” Letty said, and then frowned. She wasn’t sure, but proper ladies wouldn’t be having any of this. Just to be on the safe side, she decided to get pissed and removed herself from Forney’s grasp.
“The lantern, if you please.” She took it from Forney before he could argue, then glared at Eulis, as if it was his fault she’d been put in this position. “Brother Howe, if you would see to my bag, I’ll be inside shortly.”
Eulis scrambled to get her bag as Forney reluctantly retrieved the reins to the horses, unhooked them from the coach, and led them to the corral. His only consolation was that the dandy with the bowler hat was a preacher, and the woman had called him brother, which meant they were kin. The arrival of a pretty female led Forney to meander through all kinds of fantasies as he fed and watered the weary team of horses. And while Forney was tending to his business, Letty was tending to some business of her own.
The lantern light shed a pitiful beam through the dark as Letty rounded the side of the building. She held the lantern high above her head in hopes of lighting a broader area, and followed her nose to the outhouse. The door was hanging on one hinge and she thought she caught a flash of something furry scurrying out the door as she went in, but she couldn’t be bothered. She needed to pee and there wasn’t any kind of creeping denizen that could be worse than some of the men that she’d bedded. What did slow her down was the realization that if she took the lantern into the outhouse, her every action would be backlit for the world to see. Reluctantly, she set the lantern down a few feet from the door, gritted her teeth, and stepped inside into the dark.
Between the scent, the heat, and the pressure on her bladder, she was about to pass out. The smell emanating from the dark hole was only a degree or so worse than the inside of that stagecoach had been, but she’d only been a proper lady less than a year, and this was no time to become delicate. She hitched her skirts up around her waist, pulled down her drawers, and aimed toward what she hoped was the hole in the seat.
About the time her water started to flow, she heard a snort, then a snuffle. To her horror, there was a thump and then the little shed started to sway. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to stop what she’d started, but there are certain things that, once begun, are almost impossible to stop—one being the emptying of a very full bladder.
In the middle of her panic, the snorting stopped and the outhouse settled. She shifted her position just enough to peer out, but all she could see was darkness.
Relaxing, she continued her business with an easier mind until the hole over which she was bending
suddenly shifted out from under her. She heard pee hit the floor at the same time the walls started to lean.
Instinctively, she dropped her skirt and slapped her hands against the opposite wall, putting all her weight against the rough, hand-hewn wood in an effort to settle it back, trying to ignore the fact that she’d peed in her shoe. As she did, the tilt of the outhouse stopped, rocked once, and then started to sway back and forth on the uneven foundation.
“Lord have mercy,” Letty cried, and was reaching for the door when something hit the back wall with a thud.
Even as she was falling, she began to scream. She’d heard of being shit-faced, but never thought it would happen to her.
Eulis was dipping into the stew when he heard the first shriek, and when he did, his blood ran cold. He knew there were all levels of female screams. There was the high-pitched squeal that signaled anything from the sighting of a mouse to something that crept or crawled. And there was the scream of joy upon being presented with an unexpected gift. But neither of these fit what he was hearing. It was a gut-wrenching, spine-chilling scream of mortal fear, coupled with a rage he didn’t want to consider. He’d heard women scream before, but the only woman around here was Letty, and he didn’t want to think about what it would take to make that happen. He dropped the ladle back in the stew and bolted for the door, horrified to even consider what might have set her into such a frenzy.
Eulis came out the door as Forney and Big Bill were running from the corral. Boston Jones and Morris Field came out of the dark where they’d been reliving themselves, as well.
“What in hell?” Big Bill yelled.
“What’s happenin? Where’s your sister?” Forney asked.
“Sister? I don’t have a sister,” Eulis said, and pushed past him as he ran.
While Forney was trying to assess the confusion of facts, Shorty appeared out of the dark with a rifle in his hand.
“What’s happenin’?” he shouted. “Is it injuns?”
“It’s the woman,” Big Bill said.
Eulis ran behind the building, following the glow of the lantern light and the sound of Letty’s screams.
The others followed, but it was Eulis who grabbed the lantern from the weeds and held it high, expecting to see Letty in the throes of death. Instead, all he saw was a pile of lumber and Letty nowhere in sight.
“Letty! Letty! Where are you?”
She screamed again and he jumped and looked down, certain she must be laying at his feet, only there was no one there.
“Oh hell,” Forney muttered, and shoved his way past the others and began fumbling about in the wood.
“Leave the goddamned woodpile alone and help me find Letty!” Eulis shouted.
“That ain’t a woodpile. It’s the privy, and I reckon your sister is somewhere in there.”
“Holy Moses,” Eulis muttered, and started frantically pulling at the shamble of boards. “Letty! Letty! Can you hear me? Are you all right?”
Letty moaned. She could hear him just fine. She just wasn’t sure she was ready to face the humiliation.
“Yes, I can hear you, and no, I’m not all right! Get me out of here!”
“I’m tryin’,” Eulis said. “Grab some boards… all of you!” Then he pointed at Forney. “If you value your hide, you’d better start heatin’ up some water. Sister Leticia is right fond of baths and I’m thinkin’ she’s gonna be in need of one real soon.”
Forney looked wild-eyed toward the shifting pile of boards and the stifled sound of something that sounded suspiciously like curses, and made a run for the well, leaving Shorty and the preacher to dig her out.
His hopes of making any romantic headway with her had been dashed, and all he could hope for now was a glimpse of bare flesh when she peeled down to wash off the shit.
“I’ve got a foot!” Boston yelled, and tugged at Letty’s foot.
“I see an arm!” Morris shouted, thrust his hand between some boards and started to pull.
“Damn it to hell! I am not a wishbone! Quit pulling at me and get me out of this woodpile!”
Eulis pulled away a large portion of one wall while Big Bill hefted away what was left of the roof.
“Here you go, little lady,” Big Bill said, then reached down, grabbed Letty beneath her arms, and pulled her out.
She staggered backward, then yanked at the hem of her dress and swiped it across her face.
“Nasty… filthy… stupid… ramshackle… pitiful excuse for… idiot who built… head up his ass.”
Big Bill whistled between his teeth and then grinned.
Boston took a second step back out of the range of her anger while Morris took a handkerchief from his pocket and offered it to Letty.
“Um… ma’am…”
She slapped it out of his hands and then pointed at Eulis.
“Water… hot… out of my sight… never again.”
Eulis wasn’t sure what she was leaving out, but what she’d managed to utter was enough to jar him out of his shock. He pointed toward the station.
“Take a breath, Sister Leticia. It’ll be all right. Forney is fixin’ you a bath as we speak. All you need is…”
“Don’t talk to me!” she muttered, then turned and pointed a finger at every man staring. “Don’t any of you say another word.”
They nodded in unison.
She stomped toward the way station, dragging her wet skirt tail in the dust and tearing at her clothes with each step. By the time she hit the porch she was half-naked and in full stride.
Forney heard the door hit the wall as it flew open. He got a momentary glimpse of her bare neck and arms before she screamed.
“Get out!”
Shocked, he dropped the water bucket onto the floor, soaking his pant legs and his shoes. He felt water soaking into his socks through the hole in his shoe just before he bolted for the door.
Letty slammed the door shut behind him then tore off the rest of her clothes and stepped naked into the hip bath Forney had been filling. The water was tepid and there was no soap in sight, but it didn’t slow her down from going headfirst into the water. She came out spitting, then sat down in the bath and cried.
An hour later, the men were lined up on the porch, staring blindly into the dark and pretending they didn’t know that there was a naked woman in the house behind them.
Boston’s belly growled. He sighed deeply, absently shuffled the cards he was holding and spit for lack of anything else to do.
“I shore am gettin’ hungry,” he said.
Morris, Shorty, and Big Bill were talking quietly among themselves.
“Food’s in the house,” Forney said, woefully eying Eulis for inspiration as to how to get it outside.
Eulis shrugged. He’d been hungry before and was perfectly willing to sleep hungry tonight rather than mess with Letty. He knew her well enough to know that the worst was yet to come. He’d seen her in action. She screwed a man to death and hid his body beneath a rotting trapper without turning a hair, then resurrected Eulis from town drunk to reputable preacher in less than twenty-four hours. Someone, most likely Forney, was going to pay for what had happened to her. He was just almighty glad it wasn’t him.
Shorty sighed and then stood.
“I reckon I’ll go check on the horses.”
“I’ll go with you,” Big Bill said.
But before they could move, the door behind them opened. Letty was standing in the doorway.
“Gentlemen, I believe supper is getting cold.”
They stumbled up the steps en masse and then pushed and shoved their way through the door, anxious to get some food before she changed her mind. The dress and under garments Letty had been wearing were as wet as the hair hanging down her back, and still dripping from the hook where she’d hung them. She was wearing a modest nightgown and robe and her feet were bare. But the pot of stew was on the table, as were bowls enough for herself and the hungry men.
Forney ventured a quick glance at the woman before he moved c
loser. She seemed stable. Nothing like the screaming maniac she’d been after they’d fished her out from under the outhouse. It appeared that she’d not only cleaned herself and her clothes, but the table looked way cleaner than he could remember, so he suspected that she’d scrubbed it down, too. Anxious to regain some control of his own way station, he waved a hand toward the table, indicating that the passengers take a seat.
“Y’all sit. I’ll get coffee.”
“Already made,” Letty said, and lifted it from the stove and set it on the table, too.
“Well then,” Forney said.
Letty sat down, pulling her robe a little closer around her neck, and then put her hands primly in her lap, waiting for them to join her. They did so, each casting a nervous glance toward her before taking a seat at the table.
“Smells real good, Forney,” Shorty said.
Still put out by her bossy ways, Forney sniffed briefly then nodded.
“Just stew,” he said, then took a proprietary step toward the stew pot, grabbed the ladle and began serving it up.
Then he took a pan of cornbread from the warming oven, cut it into hunks and set it on the table. Several sets of hands reached for the pan at once as Letty cleared her throat. They froze, their hands still in midair as Letty glanced at Eulis.
“Brother Howe… maybe you would like to give the blessing.”
It wasn’t a question and Eulis knew it. He took off his hat and bowed his head. Praying still didn’t come easy but he was some better at it than he’d been months earlier. He cleared his throat.
“Dearly beloved, we are gathered…”
Letty sighed loudly.
Eulis winced. He’d done something wrong. He just wasn’t sure what. He glanced at Letty who rolled her eyes then frowned. He decided to give it one more try.
