Constance Fenimore Woolson

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Constance Fenimore Woolson Page 50

by Constance Fenimore Woolson


  “I quite understand,” answered her visitor.

  “Well, I hope you do. I went on at home after that by myself, and I did a good deal. I work pretty rapidly, you see. Then came my last lessons, from a third teacher. He was a young man from New York. He had consumption, poor fellow! and cannot last long. He wasn’t of much use to me in actual work. His ideas were completely different from those of my other teachers, and, indeed, from my own. He was unreliable, too, and his temper was uneven. However, I had a good deal of respect for his opinion, and he told me to get your art-articles and read them. It wasn’t easy. Some of them are scattered about in the magazines and papers, you know. However, I am pretty determined, and I kept at it until I got them all. Well, they made a great impression upon me. You see, they were new.” She paused. “But I doubt, Mr. Noel, whether we should ever entirely agree,” she added, looking at him reflectively.

  “That is very probable, Miss Macks.”

  Miss Macks thought this an odd reply. “He is so queer, with all his smoothness!” she said to her mother afterwards. “He never says what you think he will say. Now, any one would suppose that he would have answered that he would try to make me agree, or something like that. Instead, he just gave it right up without trying! But I expect he sees how independent I am, and that I don’t intend to reflect any one.

  “Well, they made a great impression,” she resumed. “And as you seemed to think, Mr. Noel, that no one could do well in painting who had not seen and studied the old pictures over here, I made up my mind to come over at any cost, if it was a possible thing to bring it about. It wasn’t easy, but—here we are. In the lives of all—almost all—artists, I have noticed—haven’t you?—that there comes a time when they have to live on hope and their own pluck more than upon anything tangible that the present has to offer. They have to take that risk. Well, I have taken it; I took it when we left America. And now I will tell you what it is I want from you. I haven’t any hesitation in asking, because I am sure you will feel interested in a case like mine, and because it was your writings really that brought me here, you know. And so, then, first: I would like your opinion of all that I have done so far. I have brought everything with me to show you. Second: I want your advice as to the best teacher; I suppose there is a great choice in Rome. Third: I should be glad if you would give a general oversight to all I do for the next year. And last, if you would be so kind, I should much enjoy making visits with you to all the galleries and hearing your opinions again by word of mouth, because that is always so much more vivid, you know, than the printed page.”

  “My dear Miss Macks! you altogether over-estimate my powers,” said Noel, astounded by these far-reaching demands, so calmly and confidently made.

  “Yes, I know. Of course it strikes you so—strikes you as a great compliment that I should wish to put myself so entirely in your hands,” answered Miss Macks, smiling. “But you must give up thinking of me as the usual young lady; you must not think of me in that way any more than I shall think of you as the usual young gentleman. You will never meet me at a reception again; now that I have found you, I shall devote myself entirely to my work.”

  “An alarming girl!” said Noel to himself. But, even as he said it, he knew that, in the ordinary acceptation of the term at least, Miss Macks was not alarming.

  She was twenty-two; in some respects she looked older, in others much younger, than most girls of that age. She was tall, slender, erect, but not especially graceful. Her hands were small and finely shaped, but thin. Her features were well cut; her face oval. Her gray eyes had a clear directness in their glance, which, combined with the other expressions of her face, told the experienced observer at once that she knew little of what is called “the world.” For, although calm, it was a deeply confident glance; it showed that the girl was sure that she could take care of herself, and even several others also, through any contingencies that might arise. She had little color; but her smooth complexion was not pale—it was slightly brown. Her mouth was small, her teeth small and very white. Her light-brown hair was drawn back smoothly from her forehead, and drawn up smoothly behind, its thickness braided in a close knot on the top of her head. This compact coiffure, at a time when most feminine foreheads in Rome and elsewhere were shaded almost to the eyebrows by curling locks, and when the arched outline of the head was left unbroken, the hair being coiled in a low knot behind, made Miss Macks look somewhat peculiar. But she was not observant of fashion’s changes. That had been the mode in Tuscolee; she had grown accustomed to it; and, as her mind was full of other things, she had not considered this one. One or two persons, who noticed her on the voyage over, said to themselves, “If that girl had more color, and if she was graceful, and if she was a little more womanly—that is, if she would not look at everything in such a direct, calm, impartial, impersonal sort of way—she would be almost pretty.”

  But Miss Macks continued without color and without grace, and went on looking at things as impersonally and impartially as ever.

  “I shall be most happy, of course, to do anything that I can,” Noel had answered. Then to make a diversion, “Shall I not have the pleasure of seeing Mrs. Macks?” he asked.

  “Mrs. Macks? Oh, you mean mother. My mother’s name is Spurr—Mrs. Spurr. My father died when I was a baby, and some years afterwards she married Mr. Spurr. She is now again a widow. Her health is not good, and she sees almost no one, thank you.”

  “I suppose you are much pleased with the picturesqueness of Roman life, and—ah—your apartment?” he went on.

  “Pleased?” said Miss Macks, looking at him in wonder. “With our apartment? We get along with it because we must; there seems to be no other way to live in Rome. The idea of having only a story of a house, and not a whole house to ourselves, is dreadful to mother; she cannot get used to it. And with so many families below us—we have a clock-mender, a dress-maker, an engraver, a print-seller, and a cobbler—and only one pair of stairs, it does seem to me dreadfully public.”

  “You must look upon the stairway as a street,” said Noel. “You have established yourselves in a very short time.”

  “Oh yes. I got an agent, and looked at thirty places the very first day. I speak Italian a little, so I can manage the house-keeping; I began to study it as soon as we thought of coming, and I studied hard. But all this is of secondary importance; the real thing is to get to work. Will you look at my paintings now?” she said, rising as if to go for them.

  “Thanks; I fear I have hardly time to-day,” said Noel. He was thinking whether it would be better to decline clearly and in so many words the office she had thrust upon him, or trust to time to effect the same without an open refusal. He decided upon the latter course; it seemed the easier, and also the kinder to her.

  “Well, another day, then,” said Miss Macks, cheerfully, taking her seat again. “But about a teacher?”

  “I hardly know—”

  “Oh, Mr. Noel! you must know.”

  And, in truth, he did know. It came into his mind to give her the name of a good teacher, and then put all further responsibilities upon him.

  Miss Macks wrote down the name in a clear, ornamental handwriting.

  “I am glad it isn’t a foreigner,” she said. “I don’t believe I should get on with a foreigner.”

  “But it is a foreigner.”

  “Why, it’s an English name, isn’t it?—Jackson.”

  “Yes, he is an Englishman. But isn’t an Englishman a foreigner in Rome?”

  “Oh, you take that view? Now, to me, America and—well, yes, perhaps England, too, are the nations. Everything else is foreign.”

  “The English would be very much obliged to you,” said Noel, laughing.

  “Yes, I know I am more liberal than most Americans; I really like the English,” said Miss Macks, calmly. “But we keep getting off the track. Let me see— Oh yes. As I shall go to see this Mr. Jackson this a
fternoon, and as it is not likely that he will be ready to begin to-morrow, will you come then and look at my pictures? Or would you rather commence with a visit to one of the galleries?”

  Raymond Noel was beginning to be amused. If she had shown the faintest indication of knowing how much she was asking, if she had betrayed the smallest sign of a desire to secure his attention as Raymond Noel personally, and not simply the art authority upon whom she had pinned her faith, his disrelish for various other things about her would have been heightened into utter dislike, and it is probable that he would never have entered the street of the Hyacinth again. But she was so unaware of any intrusion, or any exorbitance in her demands, probably so ignorant of—certainly so indifferent to—the degree of perfection (perfection of the most quiet kind, however) visible in the general appearance and manner of the gentleman before her, that (he said to himself) he might as well have been one of her own Tuscolee farmers, for all she knew to the contrary. The whole affair was unusual; and Noel rather liked the unusual, if it was not loud—and Miss Macks was, at least, not loud; she was dressed plainly in black, and she had the gift of a sweet voice, which, although very clear, was low-toned. Noel was an observer of voices, and he had noticed hers the first time he heard her speak. While these thoughts were passing through his mind, he was answering that he feared his engagements for the next day would, unfortunately, keep him from putting himself at her service.

  Her face fell; she looked much disappointed.

  “Is it going to be like this all the time?” she asked, anxiously. “Are you always engaged?”

  “In Rome, in the winter, one generally has small leisure. It will be the same with you, Miss Macks, when you have been here a while longer; you will see. As to the galleries, Mr. Jackson has a class, I think, and probably the pupils will visit them all under his charge; you will find that very satisfactory.”

  “But I don’t want Mr. Jackson for the galleries; I want you,” said Miss Macks. “I have studied your art criticisms until I know them by heart, and I have a thousand questions to ask about every picture you have mentioned. Why, Mr. Noel, I came to Europe to see you!”

  Raymond Noel was rather at a loss what to answer to this statement, made by a girl who looked at him so soberly and earnestly with clear gray eyes. It would be of no avail again to assure her that his opinions would be of small use to her; as she had said herself, she was very determined, and she had made up her mind that they would be of great use instead of small. Her idea must wear itself out by degrees. He would try to make the degrees easy. He decided that he would have a little private talk with Jackson, who was a very honest fellow; and, for the present, he would simply take leave.

  “You are very kind,” he said, rising. “I appreciate it, I assure you. It has made me stay an unconscionable time. I hope you will find Rome all you expected, and I am sure you will; all people of imagination like Rome. As to the galleries, yes, certainly; a—ah—little later. You must not forget the various small precautions necessary here as regards the fever, you know.”

  “Rome will not be at all what I expected if you desert me,” answered Miss Macks, paying no attention to his other phrases. She had risen, also, and was now confronting him at a distance of less than two feet; as she was tall, her eyes were not much below the level of his own.

  “How can a man desert when he has never enlisted?” thought Noel, humorously. But he kept his thought to himself, and merely replied, as he took his hat: “Probably you will desert me; you will find out how useless I am. You must not be too hard upon us, Miss Macks; we Americans lose much of our native energy if we stay long over here.”

  “Hard?” she answered—“hard? Why, Mr. Noel, I am absolutely at your feet!”

  He looked at her, slightly startled, although his face showed nothing of it; was she, after all, going to— But no; her sentence had been as impersonal as those which had preceded it.

  “All I said about having contrary opinions, and all that, amounts to nothing,” she went on, thereby relieving him from the necessity of making reply. “I desire but one thing, and that is to have you guide me. And I don’t believe you are really going to refuse. You haven’t an unkind face, although you have got such a cold way! Why, think of it: here I have come all this long distance, bringing mother, too, just to study, and to see you. I shall study hard; I have a good deal of perseverance. It took a good deal to get here in the first place, for we are poor. But I don’t mind that at all; the only thing I should mind, the only thing that would take my courage away, would be to have you desert me. In all the troubles that I thought might happen, I assure you, I never once thought of that, Mr. Noel. I thought, of course, you would be interested. Why, in your books you are all interest. Are you different from your books?”

  “I fear, Miss Macks, that writers are seldom good illustrations of their own doctrines,” replied Noel.

  “That would make them hypocrites. I don’t believe you are a hypocrite. I expect you have a habit of running yourself down. Many gentlemen do that, and then they think they will be cried up. I don’t believe you are going to be unkind; you will look at the pictures I have brought with me, won’t you?”

  “Mr. Jackson’s opinion is worth a hundred of mine, Miss Macks; my knowledge is not technical. But, of course, if you wish it, I shall take pleasure in obeying.” He added several conventional remarks as filling-up, and then, leaving his compliments for “your mother”—he could not recall the name she had given—he went towards the little curtained door.

  She had brightened over his promise.

  “You will come Monday, then, to see them, won’t you?—as you cannot come to-morrow,” she said, smiling happily.

  When she smiled (and she did not smile often), showing her little white, child-like teeth, she looked very young. He was fairly caught, and answered, “Yes.” But he immediately qualified it with a “That is, if it is possible.”

  “Oh, make it possible,” she answered, still smiling and going with him herself to the outer door instead of summoning the maid. The last he saw of her she was standing in the open doorway, her face bright and contented, watching him as he went down. He did not go to see her pictures on the following Monday; he sent a note of excuse.

  Some days later he met her.

  “Ah, you are taking one of the delightful walks?” he said. “I envy you your first impressions of Rome.”

  “I am not taking a walk—that is, for pleasure,” she answered. “I am trying to find some vegetables that mother can eat; the vegetables here are so foreign! You don’t know how disappointed I was, Mr. Noel, when I got your note. It was such a setback! Why couldn’t you come right home with me now—that is, after I have got the vegetables—and see the pictures? It wouldn’t take you fifteen minutes.”

  It was only nine o’clock, and a beautiful morning. He thought her such a novelty, with her urgent invitations, her earnest eyes, and her basket on her arm, that he felt the impulse to walk beside her a while through the old streets of Rome; he was very fond of the old streets, and was curious to see whether she would notice the colors and outlines that made their picturesqueness. She noticed nothing but the vegetable-stalls, and talked of nothing but her pictures.

  He still went on with her, however, amused by the questions she put to the vegetable-dealers (questions compiled from the phrase-books), and the calm contempt with which she surveyed the Roman artichokes they offered. At last she secured some beans, but of sadly Italian aspect, and Noel took the basket. He was much entertained by the prospect of carrying it home. He remarked to himself that of all the various things he had done in Rome this was the freshest. They reached the street of the Hyacinth and walked down its dark centre.

  “I see you have the sun,” he said, looking up.

  “Yes; that is the reason we took the top floor. We will go right up. Everything is ready.”

  He excused himself.

  “Some o
ther time.”

  They had entered the dusky hallway. She looked at him without replying; then held out her hand for the basket. He gave it to her.

  “I suppose you have seen Mr. Jackson?” he said, before taking leave.

  She nodded, but did not speak. Then he saw two tears rise in her eyes.

  “My dear young lady, you have been doing too much! You are tired. Don’t you know that that is very dangerous in Rome?”

  “It is nothing. Mother has been sick, and I have been up with her two nights. Then, as she did not like our servant, I dismissed her, and as we have not got any one else yet, I have had a good deal to do. But I don’t mind that at all, beyond being a little tired; it was only your refusing to come up, when it seemed so easy. But never mind; you will come another day.” And, repressing the tears, she smiled faintly, and held out her hand for good-bye.

  “I will come now,” said Noel. He took the basket again, and went up the stairs. He was touched by the two tears, but, at the same time, vexed with himself for being there at all. There was not one chance in five hundred that her work was worth anything; and, in the four hundred and ninety-nine, pray what was he to say?

 

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