Elizabeth smiled. “It’s my favorite movie because it’s about having dreams and not giving up on them. You don’t need to know anything about football to be inspired.”
Jack pointed to the blanket. “There’s supposed to be shooting stars out tonight.”
“Seriously?” asked Elizabeth laying down on the blanket and pillow. “I’ve never seen one before.” Jack covered her with one of the fleece blankets in his before lying down next to her. His kindness gave her butterflies. “I never took you for a stars kind of guy.”
“I don’t know if it’s cool or not but what else am I gonna do right now? I’m sick of being grounded. There are lots of things you don’t know about me.”
Elizabeth laughed. “Like why you need to wear a UNC football jersey while watching the game at home by yourself?”
“This jersey is legend! It’s signed by Willie Parker!”
“I don’t know who he is.”
“Fast Willie Parker is a running back in the NFL. He played for the Pittsburgh Steelers and the Washington Red Skins. He went to UNC. The Steelers are my team.”
“I thought UNC was your team?” asked Elizabeth confused.
Jack laughed. “I have a lot to teach you. We live in North Carolina. Of course I’m a Tar Heel fan. I wanna go there and play for Butch Davis. He’s been an NFL coach. It doesn’t get much better than that.”
“You’re going to Chapel Hill?”
“It’s a great option for me. The program isn’t excellent and I haven’t committed yet. I can’t see that I’ll get an opportunity to play for a better team.”
“I can’t believe you could be in Chapel Hill.” The possibilities were endless. That was less than fifteen miles from Durham, where Duke was located.
“What’s with Chapel Hill?”
“Nothing it’s really nice,” she smiled.
“You’re going to Carolina?”
“No, I mean I haven’t gotten in anywhere yet but I sent out one application two weeks ago to Duke. I don’t really have a backup plan. Duke is really where I want to go.”
Jack started laughing. “For thirteen years you ignored me, now we’re friends, and you’re following me to college in practically the same city so you can watch me play football?”
“I’m not following you! You ignored me for thirteen years!
Jack propped up on his side. “Do you think your mom was serious?”
“About you being black?”
“No, about that I never came over when you guys moved in? Surely, if there were kids moving next door I would have been curious.” Elizabeth shook her head and they both started laughing.
Everything happened for a reason. Now, they were friends for a reason. It was supposed to happen this way. For the second night in a row, Elizabeth was having fun. She couldn’t remember the last time she smiled so much. “Can we talk about it?”
“Talk about what?” she asked looking up at the clear sky. The night couldn’t be more perfect. “Oh my god Jack!” she shouted pointing up at the sky. “There’s one!”
“Make a wish!” he shouted. Elizabeth knew immediately what she was going to wish for. She closed her eyes and wished that Jack Bennett would be in her life forever. He grabbed her hand in his and held it tight. “Will you please tell me?”
Elizabeth was taken aback by his sudden gesture. Was this more than just a friendship? “What do you want me to tell you?”
“I want to understand more of why you do what you do.”
“Oh,” she mumbled pulling her hand away from his. “Why?”
He grabbed her hand again. “Don’t be afraid to let me in. I think you’re really nice and I want to know everything there is to know about you. Look, whatever you tell me, it’s not going to change the way I feel about you or about this friendship. I’m a good listener and I won’t repeat anything you say to anyone.”
Elizabeth turned to face Jack. For some reason, she wasn’t afraid to be honest with him. “Well, I learned today from my parents that cutting, self-injury or self-mutilation is used as a form of manipulating a mood or emotional state by inflicting physical harm. Most people who do this cut themselves, like I do, but some also burn, scratch, bite, or hit themselves, especially their head. It's a form of communicating feelings that a person doesn’t feel they can express any other way.”
“Is that what happens to you? You can’t communicate.”
She nodded. “For me, cutting releases tension very quickly. Like when I feel overwhelmed if I cut myself I can get calm almost immediately because of the endorphins. It’s like any destructive behavior like drinking, eating disorders or drugs. It doesn’t mean I’m crazy, or that I’m trying to kill myself.”
“What you’re saying makes sense.”
Talking to Jack was relatively easy. Telling him wasn’t as hard as telling Angela and Kate and she had no idea why. Maybe it was because he approached it in a non-judgmental or threatening way. He didn’t tell her she was wrong, or stupid, or crazy. He simply wanted to understand why she did what she did.
“Did you cut today?”
Elizabeth shook her head. “My mom is now conducting routine body checks.”
“Wow,” said Jack shocked. “Does that make you mad?”
“Right now, I don’t feel bad, so it’s hard to say. Do I think she’s controlling and trying to take over my life? Absolutely. Do I think she invades my privacy? Absolutely. Do I think she’s doing what she thinks she should be doing? Maybe. People always say you should be ‘yourself’, like yourself is this definite, clear thing. Yeah right! Like you know what it is or how to be it.”
“You’re really good with your words, Elizabeth.”
“I just read a lot.” She sighed. “I wish I could be sure of the things I say, like people who write quotes. I usually pick a quote of the day. I don’t know why. It’s kind of weird.”
“I like quotes,” said Jack.
“You do?”
“Yeah. Quotes get you through the days when nobody else understands what you’re going through.” Elizabeth froze. She felt like her body had been kidnapped and placed on a different planet that looked like her own. Who was Jack Bennett? He wasn’t just some popular, gorgeous jock. He was smart. He was kind, patient and understanding. He didn’t make fun of anything she did. And, he liked quotes. “I think we might have a lot in common, Elizabeth Benson.”
“You can’t say stuff like that,” she warned. “One day, I just might fall in love with you.”
Jack smiled. “Doubtful,” he smirked. “I don’t think a girl like you would fall in love with a guy like me. Besides, guys and girls can’t be just friends.”
“Yes they can,” Elizabeth said shocked. “Of course they can.”
“No, they can’t. At one point or another, maybe for a moment, or a month, or a lifetime, one or both of them will fall for the other. And, it almost certainly will never work out.”
“Wow, Jack the love skeptic.”
“I don’t believe that friends should ever get mixed up in all that complicated romance stuff but it always happens. The friendships never last.”
“What if I can prove you wrong?” Elizabeth said determined.
“How are you going to do that?”
“I’m going to prove to you that guys and girls can be just friends.”
Jack stared at her for a moment. “Is that what you want?”
“I want you not to doubt your friendships with girls. I want you to not fear that when you are good friends with a girl that they are doing it for some ulterior motive or hidden agenda.”
“Alright, Elizabeth. It’s a deal.”
Elizabeth rolled onto her back to look at the stars again. All of a sudden she got a nauseous feeling in her stomach. Jack Bennett was absolute perfection in her eyes. How could she
possibly lay there and tell him she could prove to him that guys and girls could be just friends? It was like taking everything she might want and throwing it away forever.
The Anything Friend Page 12
