by Taki Drake
Ruth waited to the last, taking those that remained. She knew that she had an entire larger box waiting for her return in her room. She also knew that to not eat with the others would send the wrong message.
The room was quiet, each woman lost in the experience.
“Those are amazing! Between the butterflies and the candy, I don’t think I’ve ever had a better hostess gift! Thank you, Ruth, for sharing this with us.”
Almost like a harbinger of doom, Ruda muttered once more, “What good is a fancy wrapping when it’s gone so quickly?”
This time, Ruth decided to answer the disgruntled woman. Turning and staring challengingly at Ruda, the Mage asked her, “What makes you think that the dance of the butterflies and flowers would only occur once?”
With a happy cry, Sabina picked up the intact gift bag and began to play with it. Closing and opening its top made the butterflies come again and again. Each of the women, barring Ruda, had to try their hand at making the butterflies dance.
The formal nature of the discussion lightened as Ruth’s gift affected more than just her hostess.
<<<>>>
When it was time to rejoin the men, Ruth was relieved. The Mage had reached her limit of meaningless small talk. She also was VERY ready to take her shoes off. One look at Pawlik’s face, and she knew he felt the same.
Pleased, Ruth was confident that they would shortly be making a quick exit. At least now she knew what the battlefield looked like and could plan.
Tomorrow, she could start her efforts to counter the smear campaign and attacks in this new and unexplored social terrain.
Chapter 44 – Balancing Scales
Cargo shuttle Alpha Six, Seer’s Rock
Gwilliam and Zorand were silent during the landing on Seer’s Rock. Both of them were immersed in unresolved feelings and battered by the impact of distant memories. To the two men, on the one hand, it seemed like a lifetime ago that they had departed from this same spaceport, never expecting to again see the asteroid that had been their home. At the same time, the unchanged configuration of the port and the presence of the same buildings made it seem like they had just left.
Typical of Seer’s Rock, there was no customs inspection when the shuttle landed. The crystal atmosphere dome rose like a clamshell as the engines throttled down below the mandated minimum threshold. The mercenary commander knew that the peculiar protections on the asteroid meant the port controllers had advance notice on what the ships contained.
If he had made planetfall with a hold full of troops, the pad would have been surrounded by a militia before he could open his hatches. His cargo was not threatening to either the colony or the port. In fact, they were bringing only items that had a potential benefit to the settlement. Supplied with that knowledge, there had been no reaction from anyone beyond the automatic landing protocols.
Nodding to Zorand, Gwilliam went to the rear of their craft and started offloading the packs that the crew on their main ship had prepared. The man stacked the medical supplies and foodstuffs in a receivables section of the tunnel that had extended rapidly in response to their arrival. The configuration of the station meant the same tunnel opened up to allow an entrance into the dome of the primary settlement.
Zorand finished securing the ship’s boards and rose from his chair with some difficulty. Age was catching up with him, and it was starting to show in a reduction in his speed of action and reduced range of movement. Grimacing, the older man admitted to himself that he was no longer as fast, or as young, as he used to be.
Reluctantly, he thought, There is only so much medicine can do to support and keep an organic body in top operating status. I’m not sure how much longer I can stay active as a mercenary.
Zorand knew that if he wanted to remain on the active combat lists, he would either have to transfer to one of the heavy armor units or get a cybernetic body. His physical form was too worn and aged to continue in his current role. Philosophically, he was opposed to being cyberized and felt that his options were becoming more limited.
I have seen too many cyborgs go mad. Perhaps, I could accept it more when it is a man in combat going berserk, but the cold and calculated killer madness of long-term cyborgs is terrifying.
Gwilliam was aware of his old friend’s increasing frailty. It was one of the reasons that Zorand was more often sent out to deal with contract discovery and the more ‘diplomatic’ aspects of their jobs. It grieved him, but he knew that Zorand would continue to serve in any capacity where he could make a useful contribution.
Slowing down or not, Gwilliam trusted Zorand enough that the older man was the only necessary bodyguard on this trip to Seer’s Rock. That confidence in him was important validation to Zorand.
His history with Gwilliam and personal experience on the asteroid meant they shared an understanding of the dynamics that existed in the closed culture. It would’ve been impossible to brief anyone else quickly or thoroughly enough to operate at the level needed to successfully complete their mission so Gwilliam had made the decision that only the two of them would travel to the Rock.
Knowledge of the culture and attitudes would be crucial if problems occurred, and they had planned for those challenges arising. Gwilliam knew that Zorand considered this option as a venture of last resort. The mercenary commander had agreed with that conclusion but had still known if everything else failed to provide them with the information he needed, Seer’s Rock was a valid option to be explored.
Zorand shook himself and moved to the hatch to see what Gwilliam had been doing. Looking at the pile of goods that the younger man had piled on the deck, Zorand smiled. Precisely two months of emergency rations, food, and water for a single person had been carefully assembled.
Gwilliam was making an unspoken, but firm statement by returning the same amount of supplies that they had been given to them when they were exiled. This was a total balancing act. Zorand could almost hear his friend saying, “We do not owe you anything. Here are replacement supplies for everything that you gave us when you sent us away.”
The medical supplies were another such statement. When the two of them had first come to Seer’s Rock, both of them had needed extensive medical treatment. The stack of supplies containing critical medicines and materials for the asteroid’s infirmary was large enough to more than offset what had been used on the two damaged young men. Once again, Gwilliam was telling the people of the asteroid that he and Zorand did not owe them.
The older man was pleased to see the measured response that Gwilliam was extending. It eased his mind and reduced a portion of the worry that he held about Gwilliam’s mental state. This is a finely calibrated action, proving to me that my friend, the mercenary commander, is still in control of himself.
Willingly, Zorand pitched in with the offloading. The two men work silently, both determined to minimize their time on the asteroid. As the older man worked to move their cargo, he noticed in passing that one of the few passenger seats in the shuttle had been cleared off. For some reason, the sight of that empty seat sent a shiver down his spine. The older man recognized the premonition as it slid over him, leaving a trail of foreboding behind it. With nothing but the omen alerting him, Zorand chose to hold his tongue.
Determinedly, Zorand focused even harder on offloading the last of the supplies. In the short while he had been working, the stack that he had been building amassed a similar height and width to that of Gwilliam.
When the two men had finished, the mercenary commander stood for a long moment staring contemplatively at the impressive pile of supplies. Cataloging the contents mentally, Gwilliam was satisfied that he had given the community at Seer’s Rock more than they had ever provided to Zorand and him as they were sent into exile so many years ago.
The medical supplies were payment of a different debt. When the two young men had arrived in their battered shuttle, the community on the Rock had provided them with medical care. At the time, there was no mention of repayment, but Gwilliam had alw
ays felt the drag of obligation ever since.
With the substantial donation of supplies and medicines, the mercenary commander was delivering a balance to that act of charity also. He and Zorand were now free of the subtle sense of obligation and control that the people on the asteroid had created.
Gwilliam could feel the release of previously unrecognized mental chains as his subconscious was freed from its prison of obligation.
The next breath he took tasted fresher, and Gwilliam felt his body grow lighter. I never realized how much I felt weighted down from my experiences here. Now, I don’t owe them anything. I am free to act as necessary, responding to how people are today rather than operating under the drag of yesterday.
Zorand had noticed Gwilliam’s pain at having to return to the Rock, broadcast in the set of his shoulders and the lack of expression on his face. The older man knew that there was always a particular agony to revisiting the first place you got thrown out of, be it a school, a bar, a town or a colony.
The older man was thankful to see a slight easing of that tension when Gwilliam straightened up and began to move again. He knew something had changed with the repayment in-kind that they had just completed. Hopefully, it would be enough to focus on their objectives and energize the two of them to meet the challenges the day would bring.
Zorand had been worried all along about how his young comrade would react to any confrontation or problem here. Separating old memories from new situations was always hard, especially when emotionally laden. With the change in Gwilliam’s posture and the easement of the man’s tension, Zorand could feel his optimism rise, only to be chilled by another touch of the cold finger of premonition as it slipped down his spine. He thought to himself, All I can do is hope for the best, and plan for the worst.
Chapter 45 – Directions of the Heart
Force X Bar, Arkken Port
Ruth had rested most of the day. The woman was exhausted from the whirlwind shopping trip, frantic preparation for the party, and navigating the dangerous conversational pits of the dinner party. She and her mate had slept until midmorning and then enjoyed a leisurely brunch. Pawlik soon had her in amused hiccups as he told her about how all of the men had tried to discover where the two of them had met. None of them just simply asked him. Instead, they had tried to find out indirectly, and their confused sentences and bizarre conversational ploys had severely taxed his control.
Ruth thought it was interesting that most of them had discounted his explanation that they had met under battle conditions. Only his longtime military friend and the eccentric Duke, Zaks, had accepted what he said.
Pawlik had been adamant that she take a nap and only do things that were not physically taxing. The Mage thought about protesting, but an internal feeling of shakiness told her that he was right. As a result, Ruth had wandered between what had become their sewing room and her own chamber, floating to address whatever simple problem that could be handled without a lot of effort.
Others were just as busy as Pawlik. Not wanting to inconvenience anyone, Ruth had stayed away from the taproom for most of the day. Cuddled up under a soft blanket on the bed, the pensive woman examined all that happened in the last few weeks. The changes have come so quickly, and the dangerous threats never stop. Before this, I would not have understood what PTSD was. Now, I think I’m living in it.
Ruth fell asleep, a deep drop into total exhaustion. The unobtrusive bodyguards in the corner changed shifts, and still, the Mage slept.
Ruth knew she was dreaming. Floating high above the planet of her birth, she gazed down with eyes that encompassed the entire population. Raw and ugly, traces of the Insectoids still marred Earth’s surface. Remembered pain stab through the woman’s core, and she heard an echo from the planet below her.
Pain and fear reverberated through the atmosphere, while uncertainty trampled the ground. The Mage knew it was no longer her home, but familiarity and memory drew her. The scent of family plucked a note too long absent, and suddenly Ruth found herself standing in a familiar kitchen looking into the drawn face and shadowed eyes of Cal’s wife, her daughter-in-law Tamara.
The woman was sitting by the screen of her computer with tears running down her face. The word processor was open, and it was apparent that the young woman had been writing a note to her missing husband and son. Leaning over Tamara’s shoulder, the Mage could see that there were hundreds of pages in that letter.
Oh, sweetheart. I wish there was some way I could take away part of your pain. Gently, Ruth reached out a transparent hand and brushed the hair away from the younger woman’s face.
Jerking upright in amazement, Tamara blurted out, “Mom? I must be going crazy! I can almost feel you, Mom. Tell my baby and Cal that we miss them every day.”
Charging into the room, a pair of small dogs ran directly to where the spectral form of the Mage stood. Wagging its whole body, the smaller of the two attempted to jump into Ruth’s arms. Try as she might, the Mage could not hold the small animal. The larger, less agile dog crouched at Ruth’s feet, trying to cuddle with her. Tears burned hot in the mage’s eyes. Unable to contain them, they sizzle through the air evaporating before touching the ground.
It felt like Ruth’s heart was breaking. She so longed to touch them, but she was in a dream and couldn’t. Staring at the younger woman’s computer, Ruth had a sudden, wild hope. Using the same mental push that allowed her to communicate with the AIs, the spectral woman said, << I am not sure if this will work, but I’m going to try. I’m dreaming that I’m with you, and you’re so real that I can see that you’ve been crying. Rocky is curled up on my feet and looks like he’s losing weight. You have to tell them I would pet them if I could. >>
“Mom! You are here! Please talk to me. We’ve been so worried, and everything is horrible here.”
Ruth pulled her energy together, feeling like she was struggling through thick water, she got as far as << love you… >> before a sharp pain in her chest and a mighty pull dragged her back.
<< <> >>
“Wake up, dammit! Wake up, Ruth!”
The Mage barely heard the words. She knew people were rushing around her, but her disorientation was so complete that she couldn’t make heads or tails of where she was and who the people were.
Thinking that she was still dreaming, Ruth attempted to wake up. All of her efforts only allowed her to twitch her fingers, but it was enough for someone else to yell loudly, “Look! I think she’s waking up.”
Just then, the Mage heard a crash of the door, and the person next to her was flung away from her body. Hot hands clamped onto her shoulder and waist, followed by a massive influx of energy. It poured into her, filling her reservoirs and anchoring her once again.
Gasping for air, Ruth tried to sit up but was abruptly yanked into the muscular arms of her Anchor. Over the top of her head, she heard his furious voice demand, “What happened? And why didn’t you stop her?”
“Pawlik, please my love, it is not their fault. I thought I was dreaming, so somehow I traveled to Earth. I saw Tamara and tried to talk to her. My chest hurt, and then somebody pulled me home.” Ruth’s voice was thready, but the silence that surrounded her let everyone hear what she said.
“Home? Where is home for you? Is it still back to Earth?” Pawlik’s voice sounded broken and unsure. Forcing her eyes open, Ruth answered the question that lay nakedly displayed on his face.
She answered, “Home to you.”
<< <> >>
Ruth rested for a couple of hours while Pawlik held her tightly. Once again she dreamed, but this time it included only confused snapshots of Earth, the slave ship, and the Home Woods of Borachland.
Even with the bad dreams haunting her sleep, the Mage woke feeling rested. After reassuring himself that Ruth had suffered no long-term harm, her Anchor carefully escorted her downstairs so that the rest of her concerned friends could see that she was all right.
Feeling somewhat embarrassed, Ruth said in a carrying voice, “okay, now
we know that I overdid it. We also know that Pawlik has good heart health because he didn’t have a heart attack on the way back here. Thank you for pulling me back from my wandering dreams. I think I’m fine and I will try to work out how not to go traveling like that again. So please, nobody ask me any more questions about it.”
Luka laughed from behind the bar. When he could talk again, he said, “Great way of keeping us from nagging you, Ruth. I think I’m speaking for all of us when I say you had us worried.”
Ruth sat down at a table and busied herself with drinking and eating. Pawlik stayed glued to her side, concerned about her even though she seemed to be recovered. Jenna and Margot were hypervigilant about guarding her. They had also increased the size of her security detail to include Gerian.
“Pawlik, please stop hovering. I’m not that fragile.”
“I’m not sure that I would agree. How can we prevent that sort of thing from happening again? It was only luck that had somebody in there to keep your heart beating.”
“I planned on spending some time with Avantor and Eshik when we went back to the Castle. They offered to help me, and this is certainly an area that their experience will fill in some of my notable gaps.”
When her Anchor didn’t respond, the Mage looked up to see him staring in shock at her.
“Who? Who are you talking about? How did you know those names?”
The Mage cringed, realizing what she had done. Spreading her hands in a gesture of conciliation all that the woman could think to say was, “Ooops?”
Chapter 46 – Miscommunication Bites
Force X Bar, Arkken Port
Margot and Jenna advanced on the Mage and stood on either side of Lord Pawlik when he demanded, “What, when, and how?”
Ruth sighed and said, “Hunter and I ran into the Eidolon of the Home Woods when we were out for a walk the day that the assassin had us pinned down. We were going to tell you about the encounter and their invitation to train you and me.”
