Chapter VIII
No one stopped Ursus, no one inquired even what he was doing. Thoseguests who were not under the table had not kept their own places; hencethe servants, seeing a giant carrying a guest on his arm, thought himsome slave bearing out his intoxicated mistress. Moreover, Acte was withthem, and her presence removed all suspicion.
In this way they went from the triclinium to the adjoining chamber, andthence to the gallery leading to Acte's apartments. To such a degreehad her strength deserted Lygia, that she hung as if dead on the arm ofUrsus. But when the cool, pure breeze of morning beat around her, sheopened her eyes. It was growing clearer and clearer in the open air.After they had passed along the colonnade awhile, they turned to a sideportico, coming out, not in the courtyard, but the palace gardens, wherethe tops of the pines and cypresses were growing ruddy from the lightof morning. That part of the building was empty, so that echoes of musicand sounds of the feast came with decreasing distinctness. It seemed toLygia that she had been rescued from hell, and borne into God's brightworld outside. There was something, then, besides that disgustingtriclinium. There was the sky, the dawn, light, and peace. Suddenweeping seized the maiden, and, taking shelter on the arm of the giant,she repeated, with sobbing,--"Let us go home, Ursus! home, to the houseof Aulus."
"Let us go!" answered Ursus.
They found themselves now in the small atrium of Acte's apartments.Ursus placed Lygia on a marble bench at a distance from the fountain.Acte strove to pacify her; she urged her to sleep, and declared thatfor the moment there was no danger,--after the feast the drunken guestswould sleep till evening. For a long time Lygia could not calmherself, and, pressing her temples with both hands, she repeated like achild,--"Let us go home, to the house of Aulus!"
Ursus was ready. At the gates stood pretorians, it is true, but hewould pass them. The soldiers would not stop out-going people. The spacebefore the arch was crowded with litters. Guests were beginning to goforth in throngs. No one would detain them. They would pass with thecrowd and go home directly. For that matter, what does he care? As thequeen commands, so must it be. He is there to carry out her orders.
"Yes, Ursus," said Lygia, "let us go."
Acte was forced to find reason for both. They would pass out, true; noone would stop them. But it is not permitted to flee from the house ofCaesar; whoso does that offends Caesar's majesty. They may go; but in theevening a centurion at the head of soldiers will take a death sentenceto Aulus and Pomponia Graecina; they will bring Lygia to the palaceagain, and then there will be no rescue for her. Should Aulus and hiswife receive her under their roof, death awaits them to a certainty.
Lygia's arms dropped. There was no other outcome. She must choose herown ruin or that of Plautius. In going to the feast, she had hopedthat Vinicius and Petronius would win her from Caesar, and return her toPomponia; now she knew that it was they who had brought Caesar to removeher from the house of Aulus. There was no help. Only a miracle couldsave her from the abyss,--a miracle and the might of God.
"Acte," said she, in despair, "didst thou hear Vinicius say that Caesarhad given me to him, and that he will send slaves here this evening totake me to his house?"
"I did," answered Acte; and, raising her arms from her side, she wassilent. The despair with which Lygia spoke found in her no echo. Sheherself had been Nero's favorite. Her heart, though good, could not feelclearly the shame of such a relation. A former slave, she had grown toomuch inured to the law of slavery; and, besides, she loved Nero yet. Ifhe returned to her, she would stretch her arms to him, as to happiness.Comprehending clearly that Lygia must become the mistress of theyouthful and stately Vinicius, or expose Aulus and Pomponia to ruin, shefailed to understand how the girl could hesitate.
"In Caesar's house," said she, after a while, "it would not be safer forthee than in that of Vinicius."
And it did not occur to her that, though she told the truth, her wordsmeant, "Be resigned to fate and become the concubine of Vinicius."
As to Lygia, who felt on her lips yet his kisses, burning as coals andfull of beastly desire, the blood rushed to her face with shame at themere thought of them.
"Never," cried she, with an outburst, "will I remain here, or at thehouse of Vinicius,--never!"
"But," inquired Acte, "is Vinicius hateful to thee?"
Lygia was unable to answer, for weeping seized her anew. Acte gatheredthe maiden to her bosom, and strove to calm her excitement. Ursusbreathed heavily, and balled his giant fists; for, loving his queen withthe devotion of a dog, he could not bear the sight of her tears. In hishalf-wild Lygian heart was the wish to return to the triclinium, chokeVinicius, and, should the need come, Caesar himself; but he feared tosacrifice thereby his mistress, and was not certain that such anact, which to him seemed very simple, would befit a confessor of theCrucified Lamb.
But Acte, while caressing Lygia, asked again, "Is he so hateful tothee?"
"No," said Lygia; "it is not permitted me to hate, for I am aChristian."
"I know, Lygia. I know also from the letters of Paul of Tarsus, that itis not permitted to defile one's self, nor to fear death more than sin;but tell me if thy teaching permits one person to cause the death ofothers?"
"No."
"Then how canst thou bring Caesar's vengeance on the house of Aulus?"A moment of silence followed. A bottomless abyss yawned before Lygiaagain.
"I ask," continued the young freedwoman, "for I have compassion onthee--and I have compassion on the good Pomponia and Aulus, and on theirchild. It is long since I began to live in this house, and I know whatCaesar's anger is. No! thou art not at liberty to flee from here. One wayremains to thee: implore Vinicius to return thee to Pomponia."
But Lygia dropped on her knees to implore some one else. Ursus kneltdown after a while, too, and both began to pray in Caesar's house at themorning dawn.
Acte witnessed such a prayer for the first time, and could not take hereyes from Lygia, who, seen by her in profile, with raised hands, andface turned heavenward, seemed to implore rescue. The dawn, castinglight on her dark hair and white peplus, was reflected in her eyes.Entirely in the light, she seemed herself like light. In that paleface, in those parted lips, in those raised hands and eyes, a kind ofsuperhuman exaltation was evident. Acte understood then why Lygia couldnot become the concubine of any man. Before the face of Nero's formerfavorite was drawn aside, as it were, a corner of that veil which hidesa world altogether different from that to which she was accustomed. Shewas astonished by prayer in that abode of crime and infamy. A momentearlier it had seemed to her that there was no rescue for Lygia; now shebegan to think that something uncommon would happen, that some aid wouldcome,--aid so mighty that Caesar himself would be powerless to resist it;that some winged army would descend from the sky to help that maiden, orthat the sun would spread its rays beneath her feet and draw her up toitself. She had heard of many miracles among Christians, and she thoughtnow that everything said of them was true, since Lygia was praying.
Lygia rose at last, with a face serene with hope. Ursus rose too, and,holding to the bench, looked at his mistress, waiting for her words.
But it grew dark in her eyes, and after a time two great tears rolleddown her checks slowly.
"May God bless Pomponia and Aulus," said she. "It is not permitted me tobring ruin on them; therefore I shall never see them again."
Then turning to Ursus she said that he alone remained to her in theworld; that he must be to her as a protector and a father. They couldnot seek refuge in the house of Aulus, for they would bring on it theanger of Caesar. But neither could she remain in the house of Caesar orthat of Vinicius. Let Ursus take her then; let him conduct her out ofthe city; let him conceal her in some place where neither Viniciusnor his servants could find her. She would follow Ursus anywhere, evenbeyond the sea, even beyond the mountains, to the barbarians, where theRoman name was not heard, and whither the power of Caesar did not reach.Let him take her and save her, for he alone had remained to her.
The Lygian was ready, and in sign of obedience he bent to her feetand embraced them. But on the face of Acte, who had been expecting amiracle, disappointment was evident. Had the prayer effected only thatmuch? To flee from the house of Caesar is to commit an offence againstmajesty which must be avenged; and even if Lygia succeeded in hiding,Caesar would avenge himself on Aulus and Pomponia. If she wishes toescape, let her escape from the house of Vinicius. Then Caesar, who doesnot like to occupy himself with the affairs of others, may not wish evento aid Vinicius in the pursuit; in every case it will not be a crimeagainst majesty.
But Lygia's thoughts were just the following: Aulus would not even knowwhere she was; Pomponia herself would not know. She would escape notfrom the house of Vinicius, however, but while on the way to it. Whendrunk, Vinicius had said that he would send his slaves for her in theevening. Beyond doubt he had told the truth, which he would nothave done had he been sober. Evidently he himself, or perhaps he andPetronius, had seen Caesar before the feast, and won from him the promiseto give her on the following evening. And if they forgot that day, theywould send for her on the morrow. But Ursus will save her. He will come;he will bear her out of the litter as he bore her out of the triclinium,and they will go into the world. No one could resist Ursus, not eventhat terrible athlete who wrestled at the feast yesterday. But asVinicius might send a great number of slaves, Ursus would go at onceto Bishop Linus for aid and counsel. The bishop will take compassionon her, will not leave her in the hands of Vinicius; he will commandChristians to go with Ursus to rescue her. They will seize her and bearher away; then Ursus can take her out of the city and hide her from thepower of Rome.
And her face began to flush and smile. Consolation entered her anew, asif the hope of rescue had turned to reality. She threw herself on Acte'sneck suddenly, and, putting her beautiful lips to Acte's cheek, shewhispered:
"Thou wilt not betray, Acte, wilt thou?"
"By the shade of my mother," answered the freedwoman, "I will not; butpray to thy God that Ursus be able to bear thee away."
The blue, childlike eyes of the giant were gleaming with happiness. Hehad not been able to frame any plan, though he had been breaking hispoor head; but a thing like this he could do,--and whether in the day orin the night it was all one to him! He would go to the bishop, for thebishop can read in the sky what is needed and what is not. Besides,he could assemble Christians himself. Are his acquaintances few amongslaves, gladiators, and free people, both in the Subura and beyond thebridges? He can collect a couple of thousand of them. He will rescue hislady, and take her outside the city, and he can go with her. They willgo to the end of the world, even to that place from which they had come,where no one has heard of Rome.
Here he began to look forward, as if to see things in the future andvery distant.
"To the forest? Ai, what a forest, what a forest!"
But after a while he shook himself out of his visions. Well, he will goto the bishop at once, and in the evening will wait with something likea hundred men for the litter. And let not slaves, but even pretorians,take her from him! Better for any man not to come under his fist, eventhough in iron armor,--for is iron so strong? When he strikes ironearnestly, the head underneath will not survive.
But Lygia raised her finger with great and also childlike seriousness.
"Ursus, do not kill," said she.
Ursus put his fist, which was like a maul, to the back of his head, and,rubbing his neck with great seriousness, began to mutter. But he mustrescue "his light." She herself had said that his turn had come. He willtry all he can. But if something happens in spite of him? In every casehe must save her. But should anything happen, he will repent, and soentreat the Innocent Lamb that the Crucified Lamb will have mercy onhim, poor fellow. He has no wish to offend the Lamb; but then his handsare so heavy.
Great tenderness was expressed on his face; but wishing to hide it, hebowed and said,--"Now I will go to the holy bishop."
Acte put her arms around Lygia's neck, and began to weep. Once more thefreedwoman understood that there was a world in which greater happinessexisted, even in suffering, than in all the excesses and luxury ofCaesar's house. Once more a kind of door to the light was opened a littlebefore her, but she felt at once that she was unworthy to pass throughit.
Quo Vadis: A Narrative of the Time of Nero Page 8
