“No skipping the tongues,” Angelo said.
“Spin it again,” Max said, his voice trembling. “I’m not doing it.”
“It’s not optional,” Joe said. “You agreed to play the game. You don’t get to pick and choose.”
Angelo hunched forward and smiled. “Why are you acting like it’s such a big deal? It’s just a kiss.”
“I’ll take your place if you want?” Jade offered.
“Yeah, okay.”
“Grow a pair and get on with it,” Angelo said. Then he raised an eyebrow. “You never know, you might like it.”
Oh God. Max looked Rick in the eyes and felt queasy. What would everyone say if he went through with it? Would they guess the secret he’d been hiding his entire life? Blood drained from his limbs and they tingled as the panic took hold, and he began to feel faint.
“You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to,” Rick said.
Max glanced around. Everyone was watching him… judging him. The longer he left it, the more unbearable it got. If only he could get up and walk out, but that would make it one hundred times worse.
This was not how he’d imagined his first kiss with a guy. It was, without a doubt, his worst nightmare, and yet the one thing he craved more than anything.
“I’ll do it.” He barely recognized his voice as the words left his lips.
“Are you sure?” Rick asked, concern etched on his face.
No. Max took a shaky breath and nodded. Rick closed the gap between them, and Max glanced back at Sian, hoping for sympathy, or support, but all he saw was her giggling at his predicament.
With a glare, he handed Sian his joint, and upon turning back, Max found himself inches away from Rick. His body trembled as he closed his eyes. A man was about to kiss him. Oh God. If anyone questioned his sexuality based on tonight, he could always blame it on peer pressure, not the fact that he wanted this man to kiss him more than he’d ever wanted any woman.
He couldn’t believe he was doing this—and with an audience. Max wanted to both savor this moment forever and scramble away before it was too late to undo it… but this could be the only chance he got. There was no way he could allow himself to kiss a man again.
The instant the heat of Rick’s lips touched his, there was no denying he was kissing a man—the sandpaper roughness of his skin, the heady musk of aftershave, and the strength of Rick’s forearm as it pressed against his back, encouraging him closer.
Max’s stomach twisted in desperate need as he kissed Rick, his anxieties almost forgotten. How was that even possible? Rick tilted his head, and Max parted his lips, keeping them firm but soft enough to allow Rick’s tongue to slip past them. Max was helpless in his response as Rick’s tongue dipped into his mouth. His lips were like velvet, and he tasted of Max’s favorite beer. It was intoxicating.
He gave in to the urge to explore Rick’s mouth, and their tongues twirled. Rick moaned against his lips, and Max’s cock jolted at the sound. He lurched away, suddenly hyperaware of their audience, guilt and fear smothering him as the enormity of what he’d done in front of them took hold.
“That was more like it.” Angelo chuckled. “Didn’t know you had it in you, Max. I take it all back.”
Max slumped against the beanbag, struggling to breathe as his eyes locked with Rick’s. Had he felt it too?
“Come on, Max, don’t keep us waiting.” Lee pointed at the bottle.
In a daze, Max spun, did what he had to do, and made a swift exit, mumbling about getting more tequila.
Puffs of smoke escaped as Max stumbled outside and around the corner of the garage, away from curious eyes. The cooler air stripped any remaining control he had over his legs, and he slid to the ground with his back resting against the wall, a lifetime of suppressed emotions escaping in an uncontrollable flood. He brought his hands to his damp face and pressed against them as more tears escaped.
How could everything go so wrong so fast? When he’d woken up that morning and driven the final stretch from their gig the previous night, he’d been excited about getting home after such a long time away. But now all he wanted was to run away and never come back.
The garage door slammed closed, and Rick’s tall form emerged. He was tense—Max could tell that without even seeing his face.
Shrinking into the shadows, Max wiped his eyes and tried to suppress his tears, praying he wouldn’t be seen. Rick scanned the yard and then turned to look behind him. Seeing Max, his eyes narrowed, and he marched up to him.
“You didn’t need to lie to me, you know.” Crouching in front of him, Rick’s face softened. “But I get why you did.”
Max clenched his fists and stared at his boots. They were falling apart. He really did need a new pair. “It was a game,” he mumbled.
“A game?” Rick reached out to touch Max’s cheek, but Max swiped his hand away. “If it was just a game, why are you so upset?”
“Leave me alone,” Max whispered, his eyes fixed on his boots.
Rick ignored him and lowered his body so he was sitting next to Max, their backs leaning against the side of the garage.
Why couldn’t he do as Max had asked and leave him alone? There wasn’t anything that could be said to fix this. All it could do was make it worse.
In a matter of hours, Rick had figured out the secret Max had kept his whole life. How was it possible for everything to have crumbled apart with one look from this man?
“Talk to me, Max. You can trust me, you know.”
Max stole a glance at him.
“Well, you don’t know you can because we just met, but… you can, okay?”
Max scrubbed his hands across his face. A part of him wanted to talk, but the thought of it terrified him. If he said it aloud, there would be no taking it back. It would be real. A sob escaped, and he clapped his hand over his mouth as tears once again began to fall.
Rick didn’t say another word. He reached across and put his arm around Max’s shoulders. The warmth of his touch and weight of his arm was a comfort, and Max leaned closer, his thoughts racing out of control.
If any of his friends found out, he’d be kicked out of the band for sure. Image was everything in their world, and having a gay front man wasn’t the image of a successful heavy metal band. Hell, he even knew of one guy in a band similar to theirs who’d committed suicide by taking an overdose because the media had found out he was gay. Max had worked hard on his music his entire life, and because of Rick, he’d likely end up homeless and busking on a sidewalk someplace if his true feelings ever got out.
“I’d lose everything,” Max said, and pressed his damp cheek against Rick’s strong shoulder.
“You can’t hide who you are forever, Max.”
“Wanna bet?” Max glanced up at him, and Rick smiled.
“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m glad I got to kiss you.”
“You are?” Max dried his eyes with the palm of his hand and leaned back so he could look at Rick properly.
“Yeah.” Rick stared at him, and Max held his gaze, his heart beating fast. “And you should stop looking at me like that if you don’t want it to happen again.”
Max’s stomach somersaulted. He’d already kissed him once that evening. Would it be so bad if it happened again while nobody was watching? Rick leaned closer, close enough that his breath caressed Max’s jaw.
“Last chance to stop me,” he whispered and reached up to stroke Max’s cheek.
His skin tingled under Rick’s touch, and he was helpless to resist—he didn’t want to resist, not this time.
Rick rubbed his thumb across Max’s lips, never breaking eye contact. Closing the final distance, he replaced his thumb with his lips and snaked his arm around Max’s back, pulling him closer until their bodies touched. This time there was no holding back.
The second Rick’s soft, warm lips pressed against his, Max opened to him, every touch burned to memory, stored away forever for all the lonely nights he was destined to have for the rest
of his life. Rick’s tongue was strong as they battled, both wanting more and doing whatever they could to get it. His slight stubble grazed Max’s skin, and he welcomed the new sensation. Rick probed his mouth hard until Max found himself struggling to breathe, but instead of drawing away, he pressed their bodies closer.
Rick pulled away, and Max groaned. Was it over already?
“You enjoyed kissing me.” Rick reached up and stroked Max’s jaw. “Didn’t you?”
“Maybe,” Max whispered, the words barely leaving his lips. “But this can never happen again.”
Rick pressed his lips to Max’s ear and whispered, “I don’t believe you.”
THE NEXT morning Max’s head felt as though it was going to explode as he jolted into a heavy consciousness. Nauseous waves rose from his chest and threatened to burn his parched throat, a feeling that had become all too familiar over the past months.
Cautiously he sat up, then rubbed his forehead as his vision stabilized.
The familiar sight of his bedroom after so long away made him smile. The two naked women sleeping on either side of him, however, were not a welcome sight. It looked as though Zoe and Lisa had found him after all. A ripped condom foil lay on the bed, the unused condom next to it. He scrambled over Zoe, slithering off the bed and groaning as he attempted to haul on his pants, which had been in a crumpled heap on the floor.
Max stumbled along the hallway to the bathroom and reached it in time to throw up into the toilet. He felt more human until he looked in the mirror and saw the dark circles beneath his eyes, a stark contrast to his currently pale skin. It was nothing a cup of strong coffee or ten wouldn’t fix. He stripped, lingering under a steaming hot shower and brushing his teeth twice before staggering down the two flights of stairs to the kitchen, stepping over several sleeping bodies along the way.
“You’re up early,” Pete said. “It’s only three in the afternoon.”
Max grunted and headed past him to the coffeepot, which had seen better days, weaving his hand between the empty bottles to switch it on.
“You stayed?” It was unusual for Pete to crash over. Max slumped on one of the kitchen chairs and, after clearing a space, rested his elbows on the table.
“No. Rick and I shared a cab at around four. Apparently the party was still in full swing, though.” Pete chuckled. “Don’t you remember?”
Max frowned. Last night was hazy. He didn’t remember much beyond…. Max froze as the memory of kissing Rick returned, and he looked up at Pete. Did he know? Oh fuck. “I don’t remember a lot after getting back here from the gig.”
“Wow, you did hit it hard. I thought as much. I have to admit the last part of the evening is a bit vague for me too.”
Pete took Max’s giant-sized skull-and-crossbones hangover mug from the cupboard and filled it with strong coffee and several sugars. He poured another for himself and joined Max at the table.
“Thanks.” Max slurped the hot caffeine goodness and tried to ignore his tongue burning.
“I figured you guys could use a hand clearing up after the party.” Pete gestured at the trash bag that was already bursting with bottles.
“You don’t have to do that. We can take care of it.”
“Max, when I came over to keep an eye on things while you were away, the house was an absolute disaster. I would’ve expected you to at least have attempted to clear up a bit before going away for six months. Especially after the party you had the night before.”
“We were running late.” Max snorted a laugh at the memory. None of them had given a thought to clearing up before leaving. Pete was right. Max loved having parties, but they were a pain in the ass the next day when they were left with all the mess. “I’ll give you a hand once I’ve had a couple more of these.” Max lifted his hangover mug and gulped the coffee down.
Hearing light footsteps on the stairs, Max glanced up. Oh no. He grimaced as his girlfriend grabbed a coffee and kissed Max on the temple before joining them at the table.
“Hey, Zoe,” Pete said. “Great party last night. I bet you were glad to see this one.” He ruffled Max’s hair.
“Yeah,” Zoe said. “Are you okay?” She studied Max.
“Sure. Why wouldn’t I be?”
“It’s just….” Zoe looked at Pete. “Never mind.”
“Either of you want waffles?” Pete asked. “I brought some over. Figured you hadn’t had a chance to get groceries yet.”
“That’d be great.”
Pete got up and went about fixing their breakfast.
Zoe leaned closer to Max and whispered, “Was everything okay last night?”
“How do you mean?”
Zoe blushed. “Well… you know…. How much do you remember?”
“Not a lot. I was blasted.”
“But you couldn’t… you know….” Zoe glanced at Pete again, but he wasn’t paying them any attention.
“Zoe, I was really drunk. What do you want me to say?”
“Nothing, I—”
“What? What are you suggesting exactly?” Max hissed. He knew where this was heading, what she was referring to. He’d found a way to avoid having sex with her and Lisa, and she didn’t like it. He’d never let that happen before with them, had always been so careful. He couldn’t let this fall apart, not now. He stroked her cheek and said, “I drank my bodyweight in tequila last night. I’m not superhuman, you know.”
Zoe gave him a relieved smile. “Yeah, I know. Sorry. I missed you, that’s all.” She hugged him close and rested her head on his shoulder.
“Here you go.” Pete slid plates of waffles and crispy bacon across the table toward them.
“Thanks, Pete,” Max said as his stomach growled.
“These look delicious,” Zoe said. “I don’t get how you’re single, Pete.”
“Yeah, well, if you know anyone”—Pete joined them—“feel free to give them my number. It’s probably about time I started dating again.”
“Mm, I’ll think about it.”
Loud crashing reverberated from upstairs.
“I’ll fix Tony a plate,” Pete said and had it ready on the table by the time Tony jumped down the last few steps into the kitchen.
“How is everyone this fine morning?”
Zoe shook her head. “It’s three in the afternoon.”
Tony sat next to Max and tucked into the waffles. “You didn’t make these, did you? Wouldn’t have thought you’d feel up to it after last night.” Tony chuckled and pulled out his cell phone. “I got some great footage of you.” He thrust his cell into Max’s face. It was a video of Max, naked and dancing on the kitchen table. “What’s it worth for me to not put this on the internet?”
Max’s cheeks burned. “You wouldn’t dare.”
“Na, maybe not.” Tony flicked through his cell some more. “But this one’s fair game.” Tony showed them a picture of Max, still naked, passed out, and being carried upstairs by Rick in a fireman’s lift.
“Oh God. You’ve got to be kidding me.”
Tony let out a huge belly laugh. “Zoe and Lisa tried and failed to carry you up, didn’t you, darlin’, but you’re a heavy lump when you’re passed out, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to do it while you had no clothes on. Luckily, Rick offered, otherwise you’d have been sleeping here on the kitchen table. I got the perfect caption too—”
“Tony,” Pete said, “remember we talked about the line that shouldn’t ever be crossed? Posting naked pictures of your brother on the internet is about as far across the wrong side of the line as it gets.”
Tony sighed and chuckled, giving Max a squeeze before turning his attention back to his food. “You’re too easy to fuck with. As if I would.” He glanced up. “Maybe—”
“How would you like it if Max crept into your bedroom, took a picture of you before you’d had a chance to shower, and—”
“He wouldn’t dare. That would be a terrible thing to do.” Tony draped his arm over Max’s shoulders.
“Try me.” Max
took a sip of coffee and shrugged Tony’s arm off. “And I’d make sure all your fancy creams and hair products were in the shot as well… and your straighteners with the skulls on them.”
Tony gasped. “He doesn’t stick on this side of that fucking line you’re always harping on about, Pete. See what I have to put up with?” Tony gently swatted Max around the head. Max ducked, and wished he hadn’t as his head began to swim.
Pete took their plates and loaded them into the dishwasher. “You both do what you like, but don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
Zoe snickered. “You have straighteners with skulls on them? That’s so cute.”
“Shut it, you.” Tony reached around Max and playfully punched her arm. “Sian got them for me last Thanksgiving as a joke.”
“Yeah,” Max said, “but he’s been using them ever since. Haven’t you noticed how silky smooth his hair is now?” Tony glared at him.
The front door slammed, and Lee’s whistling traveled down to the kitchen.
“What’s that tune?” Pete stood with his head tipped to one side as he listened. “I recognize it but can’t for the life of me think what it is.”
“It’s Defeated Nightmare’s new one.”
“Mm.” Pete hummed the tune. “Yeah, that’s it. Thanks, Tony.”
“Hi, everyone,” Lee said as he wandered into the kitchen, his arms loaded with groceries. Pete cleared a space for him next to the refrigerator, and Lee put his bags down before stacking his groceries into his cupboards. They all fended for themselves, although Max often decided to cook for all of them. “Finally up, then?”
Tony winked at him. “You must have been getting up about when the rest of us turned in.”
“Fuck off, Tony. Not all of us need as much beauty sleep as you.”
“Oh, I wasn’t sleeping.” Tony grinned at him.
Lee shook his head, putting the last few groceries away and mumbling, “Of course you weren’t. Why do you think I got the hell up?”
Max chuckled. Lee had the room beneath Tony, and he did feel sorry for him. Lee was always complaining about the noise.
“Lee, do you want some waffles? I think there’s enough left,” Pete said.
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