by Paula Quinn
Adam flicked his gaze to the door. “Because ’twould mean more to her if ye told everyone.”
The king dropped his eyes and nodded. “I plan on it.” He studied Adam fidgeting and then smiled. “You know her well already.”
“Aye, and right now she could use a shoulder.”
“You saved her.”
Adam’s anxious gaze settled on him. “I would give my life fer her. But right now—”
“All right.” The king swooshed his hand in front of him and laughed. “Go. And, Hamilton…”
Adam stopped at the door and turned to face him again.
“Do you hunt?”
“Aye, Sire.”
“Good. We’re hunting tomorrow. Bring Goliath.”
Adam nodded and hurried out of the room.
Sina had nothing more to say to her father and Adam on the matter. How could she continue to defend William after what he’d done? He’d gone too far. He was in her father’s hands now.
She wept on her way to her apartments. She felt as if her best friend just died. In a way, he had. Their friendship would never be the same—if it survived.
When she reached her doors, she hurried inside before anyone could stop her and bolted it behind her. She fell into the nearest chair and wept. She had feared that William might try to do something rash but she never dreamed…She lifted her fingers to her neck and ran them over where his fingers had been, tight, suffocating. His eyes had been so empty, so dark, looking at her and seeing someone he hated.
She wept because she loved William, she loved Anne, and she lost them both. It didn’t matter how. William was as lost to her as the queen. She would likely never see him again. She hoped she never did. She never wanted to look into his eyes again, eyes that were once more familiar than her own.
And it broke her heart.
Adam caught up with her before she entered her apartments. But he stayed back in the shadows, hearing her sobs. It tore at his guts, and he brought his hand to his belly. Her best friend had tried to kill her. He couldn’t imagine what she was going through, and he didn’t know how to comfort her.
When she closed her door behind her, Adam went to it and pressed his forehead against the cool wood. He listened to her sobs and closed his eyes.
He didn’t know how long he waited there, his body, his heart, every part of him aching to go to her. When Goliath scratched at the door, Adam finally knocked. “Sina,” he said softly through the barrier. “Let me in, lass.”
Silence answered. At least she’d stopped crying.
“I’m grieving, Adam,” she finally responded from the other side. “Grieving for him.”
“I know,” he reassured her. He didn’t care if she mourned her friend. “I want to comfert ye, love. I want to wipe yer tears and offer ye my shoulders to do with as ye will. I’ve made ye smile and laugh a time or two…toss chess pieces and shoes at me. I think I even made ye love me, though ye swore ye never would. But the one thing I canna seem to do is comfort ye. Open the door, please, lass.”
He heard the bolt moving. His heart accelerated as the door slowly opened. She stood before him, small and alone. Her eyes were swollen and red, as was her nose. Flaxen curls spilled down her temples to the fingerprints around her neck.
His muscles tightened under his coat. He wished he had killed him. Sina might have hated him for doing it, but he’d know she was safe.
She was safe with him. Only him. He wouldn’t leave her. He stepped inside and waited while she bolted the doors again.
“You got what you wanted, Adam,” she said, coming to face him. “William is gone.”
“I didna want this,” he told her. “’Twould be like someone takin’ Goliath from me.”
She stepped back. “You’re comparing William to a pet?”
He shook his head. “Goliath is my friend.”
She finally smiled, though her tears still fell. He reached out to wipe one away with his thumb. “I’m no’ here to tell ye how to feel. I just want to be here with ye.”
She moved toward him and fell into his arms, weeping again. This time he was able to hold her. He closed his arms around her, covering her in his strength. He held her until she finally looked up without sobbing. “I’m so thankful you’re here, Adam. If you hadn’t come to London, I would have married him. If you hadn’t come, you would have haunted me my entire life.”
“I willna leave ye again, lass,” he promised, picking her up and carrying her to her bed.
He set her down and straightened to remove his coat and tear away his damned cravat. “Ah,” he groaned. “’Tis good to breathe again.”
He was glad to see her smile and climbed in after her. Propping up her pillows, he sat up with his back against the headboard and pulled her across his lap. He held her close against him with one hand pressing her cheek to his chest.
He listened for over an hour while she recounted stories of her childhood with William. She wept at first, remembering happier times with him, and grieving the loss of them. But finally she began to smile again.
Cradling her in his arms, Adam watched her while she shared her life with him. He memorized every expression, everything that brought life to her eyes, like when she spoke about her friendship with Poppy and helping to deliver Amelia’s babe. He wanted to make her passionate about many more things. He reveled in the slopes and valleys of her lips and had to stop himself from leaning down and kissing them several times. He traced her dimple with his fingers and vowed to himself to always make her happy—not because it was his duty, but because she made him so damned happy. Even sitting in her room helping her through the loss of a man she loved, he felt thankful to be with her.
He finally understood why his father took on the king of England for his mother, why his uncle Colin abandoned the throne for his wife, why love was so valued and honored at Camlochlin.
He told her about Grendel, Goliath’s father, who, like his namesake, hated music, which had made life at Camlochlin a little torturous for the poor hound.
He told her about meeting his grandfather, King James, when he was a young lad, and later Anne.
“He came to Camlochlin a few times to see my mother and once when I was old enough to remember him. His visit is one of the saddest memories I have. He smiled often and played with me and Abby, but I caught him wipin’ tears from his eyes when he looked at the daughter he’d given up to nuns. He had sacrificed much and fer what? His own son-in-law took his throne from him.
“Anne’s life was no better,” he told her. “The weight of her family’s power crippled her, and in the end her closest lady friend betrayed her.” He paused for a moment, rubbing his cheek over the top of her head and realizing things about himself he never thought to consider before. “I think my aversion to power stems from them. They made me afraid of it, and in the background I was being molded into the next chief of the most powerful clan in the Highlands.”
Sina lifted her head and smiled at him. “She told me about you once, but I didn’t know ’twas you until this morning.”
“What did she say?” he asked with a playful smile. “Something pleasing, I hope.”
“She told me about a prince who didn’t want to be king and asked if I thought him a fool or wise.”
He laughed. “And yer reply?”
She told him what she’d told the queen and added, “Now I understand why you don’t want that kind of power.”
“Aye,” he agreed, loving that she tore away his layers. She made him feel ready and confident about his future because she would be at his side. Her steadfast heart would always be his. He rubbed the pad of his thumb over her chin. Hell, if he didn’t kiss her, he’d go mad.
“So,” he said, lowering his voice and his head, “Anne wanted us together.”
“I believe so,” she whispered back, watching him descend.
“She was a wise queen.” He closed his eyes and captured her stalled breath with a kiss.
He didn’t want to push her. Not t
onight. But she cupped her hands around his face and plunged her tongue into his mouth.
His guts were on fire, set ablaze by his quickened heart. He tightened his arms around her, drawing her flush against him, kissing her, cherishing her. How long had he ached to hold her like this, lost in passion’s embrace? He deepened his kiss and slid his hand down to her soft rump. She gasped into his mouth. He smiled against her teeth, knowing that her passionless years with William had left her innocent.
He withdrew and looked deep into her eyes. “I want to ravish ye, but I dinna want to frighten ye.”
“Ravish me.” She closed her eyes and tossed back her head.
He couldn’t help but smile first at her sweet display. But his gaze darkened on her neck. He ran his lips over her discolored skin, kissing her softly. The overwhelming desires to possess her, protect her, and kill for her coursed through him. He’d never loved anyone like this. He felt weak, yet stronger than ever before. He couldn’t think straight, but it was clear to him that she had claimed his heart.
She moaned when he stretched his palm over her tightly encased bosom.
He ran his tongue over her collarbone while he pulled at the laces of her stays. Every inch of her shift that he exposed brought a slight gasp or languid sigh from her lips, compelling him further.
He freed her from her stays and pulled her hairpins loose, sending her hair tumbling down over his hands.
“Hell, lass,” he ground out on a throaty whisper when he stopped to gaze at her. “Ye’re beautiful.”
She lowered her gaze, blushing in her shift. The thin linen barely concealed her tight, upturned nipples. He felt himself growing harder beneath her rump. He slowed his breath. Slowed for her.
“Take off your léine,” she requested on a quavering whisper.
He felt a charge through his body, the way it felt to be out in the vale in a lightning storm. He wanted her, to finally make her his. “Lass, if we make love, there’s no goin’ back.”
She smiled. “That’s always been the issue, has it not? Sometimes I wish you hadn’t been so noble.” She tugged at his shirt, emboldening him to help her.
“The first time I saw you take off your léine…” She ran her palms over his bare chest and the trembling muscles along his arms. “I thought, how will I ever be able to fight him off? But I never had to. You didn’t force yourself on me when so many other men might have.”
She wriggled atop him and pulled at her shift. “You won my heart without putting a finger on me. I was just too guilty over William to admit it. Now,” she said, pulling her shift over her head, “I give you my consent.”
Adam gazed at her shrouded in her golden mantle. Her hair covered her breasts, but she closed her arms around herself anyway.
“I’ve never done this before with William,” she said shyly.
Adam knew. “Good,” he said with a smile and pulled her into his arms for a kiss.
Chapter Thirty-Four
Sina closed her eyes as Adam’s mouth covered hers. His flesh against hers felt like steel armor, but it was warm and malleable beneath her fingers when she coiled her arms around his neck.
She loved kissing him. She felt cherished and desirable in his arms. It was more than anyone had ever made her feel.
When he moved his mouth down her neck, and lower, her body tightened. She might be a virgin, but thanks to Poppy’s and Eloise’s tales, she knew of some of the things men and women did to each other in bed. She was nervous and excited to do them with Adam.
She closed her eyes and sucked in a short gasp when he dipped his mouth to her breasts. His lips and teeth gently played with her sensitive buds, sucking each in turn. He drank from her until she squirmed in his lap.
Holding her in his arms, he lifted her from his lap and laid her on the bed.
Hovering over her, he unbuckled his belt and unlaced his pants. Her heart stopped beating while she stared up at him. Gazing at him was like looking at some mythical being who was about to have his way with her. She wanted to tear off her petticoats and offer herself up to him. Give him all he asked, all he had so patiently waited for.
Seeming to read her thoughts, he turned her gently over on her belly and untied the laces of her skirts. He pulled them down around her thighs, kissing the soft mounds of her buttocks and making her heart bang madly in her chest.
After worshipping the back of her, he turned her again and reveled in the sight of her body, clothed only in her woolen stockings.
She tried to cover up but he kissed everything she sought to hide. Soon, his mouth and his tongue on her made her forget everything else. She let him sweep her away on pure bliss and excitement that titillated her senses and made her ache between her legs.
She pulled on the ribbon at his nape, freeing his inky hair around his broad shoulders. He rose up on his knees, giving her a full view of his rippled abdomen and the dark line of hair disappearing beneath the loose laces of his breeches. He took her ankle in his hand and lifted it to his lips.
Exposed to his hungry gaze, she blushed and looked away, holding her breath.
“There is no one more beautiful than ye on this earth, Sina,” he whispered along her stockinged calf. “I finally understand what Finn has been singin’ aboot all these years.”
He eased her apprehensions and emboldened her to move her leg along his neck. He leaned in and traced her inner thigh with his fingers, and then slipped his fingers between her legs.
Sina bit her lip and rolled back her head. His touch was so intimate that she felt as if she belonged to him, only him. She would never want any other man.
She wanted more of him now. She moved in his hand as he rubbed her crux and made her groan. Everything in her tightened and burned with an uncontainable fire. She never felt anything like it before. She relaxed her other leg and opened it wider, inviting him where no other man had been before.
He tugged at his breeches, slipping them down his hips.
Sina watched, entranced and terrified, as his heavy lance sprang upward and at the ready. She couldn’t look away…until he pushed his breeches over his long, muscular thighs and bent and pulled to get them over his knees. The interplay of powerful muscles made her catch her breath and say a quick prayer.
He was ready, eager for her.
He moved over her like a shadow, his breath warm above her flesh. She closed her eyes and fought not to tremble. She didn’t want to think about how much that thing was going to hurt. Eloise had described her first time as “stabbing and excruciating.”
“Lass,” he whispered, his mouth hovering above hers. “I’ll listen to yer body and do only what it tells me.”
She smiled, relieved to be in control of what was going to happen. She didn’t know how he would do what he promised, but she trusted he would do it.
She curled her arms around his neck and pulled his mouth to hers. Slowly he settled his big body atop hers, letting her take in the feel of his weight, the shape of his desire.
Running his fingers over her jaw, her neck, he promised to protect and take care of her. To fill her days with heather and happiness…and him.
He kissed her chin, her neck, her mouth. His tongue searched longingly, deeply, while he moved his hands over her body. He flooded her senses with his size, his strength, his scent until she became aware of nothing but him.
When he pressed his hips against hers, she caressed his heat and ground out a satisfied sigh at his pleasured moan.
She thought she’d be more shocked at the feel of his aroused, naked body against hers, but he fit so perfectly—as if he were made to be with her.
Boldly, she ran her fingers down his back, over his hips and the corded sinew of his arms. He kissed her neck, licking a path downward to her breasts.
Oh, nothing in her life was ever like this—so…explosive, so earth-shattering. It had always been different with Adam. Even before she lost her heart to him, she’d thought about losing her virginity to him. He’d lit a spark of sexual desire
in her she hadn’t known existed.
Now he was going to make them one in the eyes of God, and she was going to let him. She didn’t care about her father, or anything else. She felt invincible in Adam’s arms.
Driven by some primal instinct, she lifted her legs around his hips, spreading herself beneath him.
With a deep moan of pure sexual pleasure, he drove the length of his cock over her crux, sending scintillating tremors throughout her body. He did it again, slowly, staring into her eyes.
“Ye’re mine, Sina.”
She remembered his refusal to seek out the beds of other women when she’d denied him. He’d waited, letting her move at her own pace. “And you are mine.”
She buried her face in his hair and dripped around his long shaft.
She felt the tip of him push gently at her entrance—and then she felt his hands cupping her face, his lips covering hers. He pressed a series of short, slow, hungry kisses to her mouth, and she was lost to the desire in his hooded gaze.
She barely felt him push again as he dipped his mouth to her nipple and caught it in his teeth.
Pain subsided and she moved her hips beneath him, inviting him deeper.
Slowly, and with great patience, evidenced in his clenched jaw, he broke through her barrier and caught her cries in his mouth.
He stayed close, pressing himself against her core as he drove himself deeper, their bodies locked in passion’s sweet dance.
“Ye drive me wild,” he breathed on a husky groan.
She liked driving him wild. He didn’t give himself up to many things—love, titles, duty. But from the beginning, he’d given himself up to her. He not only accepted his unwanted bride, he did his best to make her transition easier. She was glad he gave himself up to her.
He sank deep, gyrating his hips, creating delicious friction between their sweating bodies until all pain and fear left her and Sina felt her world begin to tilt.
They were one, joined together, her thighs stretched tight around his waist, her fingers clutching his shoulders.
