“You shouldn’t be out here,” he said. “It’s cold.”
“I’m warm enough. I found a pair of your sweatpants. I hope you don’t mind that I borrowed them.” She held up her palm. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to say that I’ll pay you. I’m just borrowing them. And since you’re already upset, I must tell you I used some of your soap to wash up and your hairbrush, too.”
“Look, Ana…about what happened…” He drew a breath. “I never should have…”
“Kissed me?” she finished.
He nodded. “It was uncalled for.”
Ana didn’t know what to think about this man. Memory or no memory, that kiss was like nothing she’d ever experienced before. Jake Sanderstone invoked feelings in her that felt new and exciting. “I’d say so.”
She saw a flash of anger in his eyes, then hurried on to say, “Maybe I…I’m a little strong-willed.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “Yeah, a little.” She shrugged, then looked around her surroundings. “It’s going to be difficult to stay out of each other’s way.”
He turned back to Toby and continued the brushing. “I guess so.”
“You said you need space. I take it that you aren’t used to living with anyone.”
“If you want to know if I’m married, the answer is no.”
His answer was a relief to Ana. She came further into the shed and went over to the stall of a roan mare. She reached out and rubbed the mare’s forehead. The animal responded to the attention. “You’re a pretty girl,” Ana said, then opened the gate, walked inside and reached for the currying brush. For the first time since she woke up yesterday, she felt like she had connected with something. Horses. In long sure strokes, she ran the brush over the animal’s back.
“I take it you know your way around horses?”
She nodded. “Maybe I have a horse of my own. What’s her name?”
“Maisie.”
“Okay, Maisie.” She smiled. “Do you think you and I can be friends?”
For a while Jake and Ana continued grooming the horses, then Jake finally broke the silence, “I want you to know that you don’t have to worry about me doing anything like I did earlier.”
Ana stopped brushing. “Which are you talking about? The way you yelled at me, or the kiss?”
“All of the above. I took my anger out on you. I had no right to manhandle you. It won’t happen again.” He looked at her, his eyes mesmerizing. “You could be married…”
She couldn’t imagine herself having a husband. If there were someone else, she doubted Jake’s kiss would have caused such a reaction. “I want to apologize for slapping you.” Sudden emotions rose to her throat, but she swallowed them back. “I don’t like violence.”
He nodded. “I provoked it.”
She doubted a man like Jake apologized much. “It still wasn’t right. And I’ll try to stay out of your way.”
“Don’t worry about it. I should have been more understanding of your situation. You’re frightened and worried…”
“I’m not frightened,” she said and realized she really wasn’t, not with this man, her rescuer. “I’m upset over the deaths of the men in the plane. I’d hate to think I’m the cause.”
“I told you you’re not responsible. It was the weather or mechanical failure that caused the crash.”
She glanced toward the rough terrain beyond the rocky ridge. “It seems so barbaric to leave them there all alone.”
“There’s nothing we can do now. Maybe when the weather clears, we can go back. Hopefully by then we’ll have some help. And if your memory hasn’t returned we might find some information about you.” She nodded and for a while they were silent. He spoke first, “Again, I overstepped, Ana. It won’t happen again. You have my word.”
Ana wasn’t surprised the man didn’t once say the word “sorry.” Most men had trouble admitting a mistake. Well, she wasn’t going to let him off the hook so easily. “You’re forgiven…if…”
He cocked an eyebrow. “What?”
“I’ll forgive you, if you let me spend time out here taking care of Maisie and Toby.”
He tossed her that cocky smile of his. “How generous of you.”
“May I come out here?”
“Now let me understand this. You’d rather care for two smelly horses, feed them and muck out their stalls than cook inside a warm cabin.”
“Yes,” she said eagerly. “I think it might help with my memory, too. Perhaps when the weather clears we can go riding.”
He raised a hand. “Now let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I don’t want you spending all your time out here. The weather…you could catch a cold.”
“If you loan me some more clothes—”
“Lady, my wardrobe is pretty limited. Besides, we aren’t exactly the same size.”
Ana raised her chin. “I can understand if you don’t trust me around your horses, but I assure you, I would never hurt them.”
“I’m not worried about the damn horses, it’s you. These guys are pretty gentle, but what if you get kicked or fall?” He frowned. “Just promise me you’ll be careful.”
She smiled. “I promise I’ll be careful. And I’ll be out of your way, too.”
“Suits me.” He came out of the stall and walked toward the cabin.
“Wait, we haven’t finished our deal.”
Jake stood just inside the overhang. “What?”
“I will feed horses and clean the stalls. But I want something, too.”
He studied her for a moment, then finally said, “And what would that be?”
“That I won’t have to cook.”
She could tell that he didn’t like being bested, but he hid his irritation well.
“It’s a deal, but only if there are no complaints and you help with the dishes.”
“That’s unfair. I’ll be doing more work…” She paused. “Okay, have it your way…this time. I’ll get mine the next.”
That’s what worried him. “I have no doubt you will.”
Sweat slithered down Jake’s back as he crouched behind the Dumpster. Staring out into the pitch-black night, he couldn’t see anything. But he knew one thing, Meg was inside the warehouse, unprotected. He didn’t like that. He was going to give her two minutes to come out, or he would go in, and he didn’t care if he was blowing their cover or not.
No more taking chances. If they lost the gun dealers or not, so be it, he wouldn’t put Meg at risk any longer. That meant they had to get Novack tonight, or nearly two years of undercover work was down the drain.
A sound came from the warehouse and Jake alerted his backup that something was about to go down. Then Meg appeared in the doorway and his pulse leaped as she walked out with the known mercenary, Gil Novack, and two of his men.
“Come on, Meg. Just lead him to us,” he muttered. From the beginning he hadn’t wanted her to be the one to go in.
Suddenly the mood changed when Novack turned and said something to Meg. She looked shocked, then angry. With an unladylike gesture, Meg stormed off toward her car. What the hell had gone wrong?
Jake started to go after her, but another bureau agent grabbed him and held him back. Then before Jake could look back at his partner, an explosion rocked the ground and threw him backward.
“Meg! Meg!” he cried out as huge orange flames engulfed her car. Intense heat singed his body as he gulped needed air into his lungs, feeling the burning clear down to his stomach.
“Jake…Jake…” A soft voice spoke his name, then came a soothing hand against his damp skin. Still gasping for a breath, he opened his eyes to find Ana.
It was dark, only the light from the fire allowed him any sight. Her wavy hair circled around her face, her big eyes full of concern.
“What are you doing in here?” He tried to withdraw but she was sitting beside him on the couch, her hip tucked tight against his where he’d stretched out for the night. She had chosen one of his T-shirts to sleep in. He glanced down at her breasts, perfectl
y outlined by the thin cotton.
He bit back a groan and sat up.
“You cried out,” she said. “I came in to see if you were all right.” She touched him again. “You’re shaking.”
He sat up and moved to the end of the couch, but she was still too close. He glanced at the fire and found a makeshift clothesline with her lacy panties and bra drying next to his boxers. Short on clothes, she had to wash out the few things she had on a daily basis.
He groaned again. In only a few days, the woman had managed to crowd into practically every corner of his solitary life.
“You want to talk about it?” she asked. “The dream, I mean?”
Dream, hell, it was a nightmare. “No. I do not want to talk about it.”
“Maybe you’ll feel better.”
He gave her a sideways glance. “It amazes me how women think that if you just talk about it, it’ll make it better. Well, I got news for you, chère, nothing will make this better.” He stood, grabbed his shirt off the table and jerked his arms into the sleeves as he crossed the room to the farthest corner.
For a long time there was only the crackling sound of the fire.
“I’m sorry,” Ana sighed. “I only wanted to help. When you cried out…I thought you needed…I mean, you’ve been taking care of me and I only wanted to return the favor.”
“I don’t need any favors.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” she said in a whispered voice.
There was long silence, then Ana’s soft footsteps as she headed back to the bedroom. Good. He didn’t want to rehash any of this. He raked a shaky hand through his hair. His past was his business. But the thought of being alone right now was worse.
“I worked for the FBI,” he began.
More silence, then Ana spoke, “That sounds like a dangerous occupation.”
He glanced over his shoulder at her. Mistake. She looked like an angel, but he definitely wasn’t having angelic thoughts about her. He hadn’t since the moment he’d laid eyes on her. All that honey-colored hair laying in waves against her delicate shoulders. His T-shirt nearly swallowed her up, but didn’t hide the curves, her full breasts and shapely hips. He drew a labored breath. He’d always been a leg man.
He shifted his thoughts away. “My particular job was dangerous. I was on a two-year undercover assignment.”
“I take it you’re no longer undercover. I understand your FBI doesn’t work outside the United States.”
Another piece of her memory. Did she work for the Penwyck government? He had to get back to the crash site. There were too many unanswered questions. “Not that they advertise about, and no, I’m not on any assignment. I no longer work for the bureau.”
“I imagine you were good at your job,” she said and started across the room toward him.
Jake tensed. He didn’t need her to come any closer. He was too vulnerable right now. He ached for nothing more than to hear her whispered comfort, to feel her gentle touches and make him forget…to erase the nightmares. He just didn’t deserve them. Not after what he’d done. He had to push Ana away….
“Yeah, chère, I was so good that I was responsible for my partner’s death.” Seeing the shocked look on her face, he knew he’d hit his target. He grabbed a raincoat off the hook, slipped it on, then walked out the door.
When the latch clicked shut, Ana sank against the back of the couch. That explains a lot, she thought. She looked at Max, standing by the door.
Jake’s moods, his brooding, the sadness in his eyes. Her heart went out to the man who had rescued her. And by her own admission, she hadn’t been the most gracious houseguest. She seemed to have a knack for irritating him, remembering the kiss they’d shared, even if it was in anger. Just the thought that he’d desired her, sent a thrill through her. Jake Sanderstone had a skilled mouth and knew how to use it.
These feelings had kept Ana awake the past two nights. But Jake obviously hadn’t felt the same, he been doing everything to stay away from her. He’d acted as if she had the plague. When she heard him cry out in his sleep, she came running, wanting to help him. But once he saw it was her, he couldn’t get far enough away. That hurt. Then she learned the heavy burden he’d been carrying around. Now, she understood so much. He’d been living here for months, alone, brooding over what happened.
She knew what it felt like to feel you’d caused someone’s death. Her thoughts turned to the men in the plane. Had she been responsible for their fate?
In the past few days, she’d gotten to know Jake Sanderstone. This man couldn’t have been responsible for his partner’s death. But nothing would change until Jake believed that, too.
At dawn, Ana forced herself out of bed. Tired, she suspected she’d never been an early riser. Pulling on sweatpants and a flannel shirt to protect her against the cold, she went to tend to her chore, the horses.
In the main room of the cabin, she found Jake asleep on the couch. So as not to disturb him, she tiptoed past him to the sink. She had overstepped the line last night, and she didn’t want a repeat confrontation first thing in the morning.
She quietly pumped enough water to brush her teeth. Jake had given her one of his extra toothbrushes. After finishing the task, she placed the toothbrush back in the glass next to his. Pushing aside her awareness of the intimacy of that simple act, she turned to the cupboard and reached for a can of juice. Grabbing her rain gear, she went out to the porch.
She spent the next hour in the shed, mucking out the stalls and grooming Maisie and Toby, wishing she could exercise the restless animals.
“I know how you feel,” she said aloud, watching the steady stream of rain running off the structure. Just a repeat of the four days before. Her thoughts turned to Jake, knowing he must be going crazy, too.
She spent more time in the shed to avoid the confines of the small cabin. After cleaning up and polishing some tack, she was rewarded with a nice find. An old pair of canvas shoes. Finished with the chores, Ana walked back to the cabin, allowing the rain to wash over her. Her heavy rain wear pretty much kept her dry, but she needed the freedom of the open space. By the time she reached the porch she was chilled, but didn’t care.
When she walked in, she found Jake at the stove cooking breakfast. She couldn’t help but stop and enjoy the view. Jake Sanderstone was too good to pass up. In a pair of old jeans, he was lethal. His bottom was firm, his thighs toned. Her gaze slid upward to his narrow waist, then higher to the expanse of his muscular back and broad shoulders. Her pulse began to race, her breathing became difficult.
He was perfection.
Suddenly he turned toward her and her cheeks flamed. He frowned. “Are you all right?”
She nodded, unable to speak. Turning around, she hung up her coat and took off her boots. Then picking up her find in the barn she walked to the table.
“Look,” she said in a throaty voice. “I found them in the shed.” She held up a ratty pair of old shoes. “May I borrow them?”
Jake blinked at the once-white tennis shoes and nearly laughed. What woman would care so much about shoes that should be in the trash? He was beginning to realize that his survivor was far from ordinary. “I don’t care. I don’t think anyone is going to fight you for them.”
“Well, I didn’t know if they belonged to someone you know, someone who’d been up here…for a visit.”
So she was wondering about a woman. That intrigued him. It also made him think about how long it’d been since he’d…shared company with a woman. Or even wanted to until…“I haven’t had any visitors,” he grumbled.
“Oh, then I guess they were left behind by the previous tenant.”
“Must have been.”
“Good, then I won’t wear out your socks.” Smiling, she sat down and pulled them on.
“I have plenty of socks. But those are the only sweats I have. You wear those out, you’re in trouble.” He was the one in trouble. For his own sanity, he needed to keep Ana covered.
“All I know is that my
feet are covered. She stood and they both glanced down at the too big, at least by a whole size, shoes. She had to lace them tight just to keep them on her feet.
He bit back a grin as he placed the plate in front of her. “Sit, and eat your eggs,” he ordered.
“What kind of eggs are these?”
“Scrambled. I broke the yolks.”
She wrinkled her nose and sank into her chair. “They’re mixed together.”
“Is that a problem?” he asked. “You can wear old shoes, but you can’t eat your eggs scrambled, chère?”
“Don’t call me…” she stopped. “Of course I can eat them. I just don’t like—remember ever having eggs this way.”
Dammit, he was goading her again. He released a long sigh and sat down across from her. “Just try them. A lot of people prefer them this way.”
She added a little salt, then picked up her fork and took a bite. “They are good.”
“I mixed in a little canned ham. Enjoy them, because that’s the last of them. From now on, we’ll be eating pancakes.”
“Until the rain stops,” she said optimistically.
Jake took a bite of his food, then glanced toward the window. “Hard to tell when that will be. It’s been four days since I’ve seen blue sky.”
“It would be nice to go outside without getting wet.” She looked at him. “Jake, I know my being here has been hard on you. I mean, you have no privacy…”
“We’ve managed,” he lied. He didn’t tell her what just being in the same room with her did to his libido. How she made him think about things he could never have.
Dressed in his clothes and those too-big shoes, she was one class act. Even if he was looking—which he wasn’t—a woman like Ana was out of his league. In so many ways. There was no doubt in his mind that Ana had a man waiting for her return. A man better suited, to her, one who knew how to treat her.
Once she was safely back with her family, he could move on with his life.
“When you get home, you’ll be able to push these miserable days from your memory.”
Ana rested her fork on the plate. “I doubt I ever will. There are two men over the ridge who died in the crash I survived.” Sadness clouded her pretty face. “I can’t stand the fact they’re up there…exposed.”
The Princess Has Amnesia! (Crown & Glory Book 5) Page 5
