by M. A. Innes
“...beautiful.”
He made a frustrated noise as I pulled my hand away that sounded very much like a noise one of the pups on the videos would have made. He didn’t seem to realize it, though, because he just kept wagging the tail as his body started to vibrate with pleasure.
When I reached for the hood, his body jerked and the wagging slowed down as he turned his head to watch me. Moving around in front of him, I ran my hands over his head and down his back in long, slow strokes. “How about you close your eyes and just focus on the tail?”
Tobias inhaled deeply and shifted. “I don’t know.”
I wasn’t put off by his hesitation. He’d done basically the same thing when we’d talked about a lot of the less vanilla parts of our love life. I just had to be patient, and eventually, he’d talk himself into trying it as long as it wasn’t something that would be a hard no for him.
I’d always been careful to step around what I thought could be hard limits. This was the first time I’d pushed him and brought up something very outside the box. I knew he’d like it at some point. He just might not be ready to admit it yet.
Tobias finally closed his eyes and stilled, which I knew meant I was supposed to continue, but he looked a little like a kid who was getting ready to go to swallow gross-tasting medicine. I forced myself not to smile because he wouldn’t find it funny, but I just wanted to kiss him and tell him it wasn’t going to be that bad.
It was a hood, not cherry cough medicine.
Not wanting to give him another chance to change his mind, I carefully eased the hood over his head and secured the back. His eyes stayed closed as I adjusted it, but I could feel little shivers running through him. I wasn’t sure if it was because of the tail or his nerves, but either way, I tried to work quicker.
When it was secure, I pulled back enough to get the full picture. “Beautiful.”
He was incredible.
I reached out and stroked my hand over the muzzle and up toward his ears. The blue looked perfect against his pale skin, exactly the way I’d known it would be. This was still new to him, I understood that, but I’d had weeks of fantasies and images in my head about how he would look.
I had a beautiful pup.
His eyes slowly opened as I continued to stroke over him, making low, soothing noises. When I started caressing over his back and down to nudge his tail again, he shivered and a needy sound came out. It wasn’t a bark or anything technically close to it, but Tobias seemed self-conscious about the sound because it stopped as soon as he realized he’d made it.
“You’re perfect—exactly as I imagined.” I caressed down his thigh and reached under him to stroke his cock again. “I’ve pictured throwing a ball for you while you ran around with your dick swinging. I pictured stroking you and cuddling with you while you relaxed. This is even better than I thought it would be, though.”
As Tobias turned to me, I knew he had questions, but the words didn’t come out. Instead, he nudged his muzzle against my head and thrust his cock harder into my hand. Taking that as some kind of order to continue stroking him, I did my best to follow it.
All I wanted to do was please my pup, and I needed him to see that.
I brought one hand back up to his muzzle and started stroking over the hood and down his back. With the other, I kept a loose fist around his cock and let him hump against me as I stroked. The next time we did this, I would remember lotion for his cock before he got fully into his role. For now, though, the precum dripping out of his cock was enough for him.
As I continued to caress and pleasure him, Tobias started shifting. He wasn’t moving away from me, but it felt more like he was getting used to the way the mitts felt and the experience of being a pup. The wagging continued enthusiastically as I ran my hand over his lean body and soft skin. With every shift and movement, I could feel it in his muscles. It felt almost like I was seeing him for the first time.
I couldn’t remember ever noticing how the muscles in his back would arch and bunch as he got closer to his orgasm. Most of the time, he was always focused on me. I could only remember a handful of times where I’d gotten to stretch out beside him and watch as his pleasure built.
I loved taking care of him in the shower, and when I got to do things like go down on him, but this was different. This was intimate and beautiful.
The wagging grew more frantic as his orgasm got closer. Tension flooded his body, and I felt his cock start to throb in my hand. Tightening my hand around his dick, I caressed under his chest and flicked my fingers over his nipples.
Tobias growled out a low sound that could have just been a grunt from the overload of pleasure, but part of me hoped he’d finally found his inner pup. As his orgasm crashed through him, cum shot out of his dick, drenching my hand as I continued to work his cock. Tobias shook and arched, gasping and humping, all while wagging his tail.
When the pleasure had finally faded, I reached up for his briefs and used them to clean the cum off my hand and his softening dick. Tobias couldn’t seem to decide what to do as his body started to come down from the high of his orgasm, but since he still didn’t speak, I wrapped him in my arms and pulled my pup onto my lap.
Tobias curled into me and sighed as his eyes closed, finally seeming to relax. Every muscle in his body was pliant and wrapped around me as his tail swung slowly and he made soft little noises. I didn’t want to break the peace that was floating through him, but I needed him to know how incredible this moment was for me.
Whispering quietly, I stroked over his back with one hand and held him close to me with the other. “You are the most beautiful pup I’ve ever seen.” I leaned down and kissed his head between his ears. “Holding you like this is more perfect than you’ll ever understand.”
Tobias made a low huff and whined, the sweetest puppy sound ever.
Emotion flooded through me and it was like I was falling in love with him all over again. Falling in love with a new side of him neither of us had really known was there, but that just made it more perfect. Holding him in my arms when he’d finally let everything go and was completely relaxed for the first time in what seemed like forever, I finally felt like I’d given him as much as he’d given me—a place to be safe and a place to be himself.
Epilogue
Tobias
Three months later
“How did I get roped into this?” I glanced over and frowned when Noah snorted. “What?”
“You filled out the forms. You called the club when you had questions. You even picked out your new name tag on your collar.” One eyebrow went up dramatically. “Do you really need help figuring out who dragged you here?”
“That’s not the important question.” It was my turn to snort when Noah laughed before turning back to focus on the road.
“Then what is?” Noah’s voice was a little too cheerful and was starting to get on my nerves. Why couldn’t he be freaked out about this like any normal person would be?
“What is what?” The question didn’t make any sense at all.
He started chuckling again before clearing his throat. “What’s the important question?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” I was in the middle of a mental breakdown, and he was not appreciating the gravity of the situation.
Noah didn’t stop chuckling, but he reached over and laced his fingers with mine before moving our hands to my lap. He held me tight for a long few moments as he weaved his way through the afternoon traffic, listening to the GPS.
“If you’ve changed your mind, that’s fine. We can do this another time or never, if that’s what you decide.” His fingers lightly stroked mine as he spoke, the tone of his voice and the soft caresses both designed to help me relax.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t ready to relax.
“I haven’t changed my mind.” I’d taken long enough to decide I wanted to do it, and I wasn’t going to back out before we’d even gotten to the club.
“You’re in charge of how
fast we go. There’s nothing wrong with deciding that we might have jumped the gun a bit. The club’s been around for years, and I don’t think it’s going anywhere.” His quiet logic wasn’t helping my nerves.
“Why aren’t you more worried about this?” When I realized how rough the words had come out, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I know how hard this is for you.” Noah’s tender voice was still quiet and soothing as he tried to talk me down from the ledge.
“I know this probably isn’t the answer you want to hear, but I’m not worried because I’m excited.” The first hint of his emotions came through as I heard the smile in his voice. “I love watching Toby chase the ball and run and play, and I want him to have friends. I can’t wait to see Toby meet the other pups.”
Toby was me...Well, my pup was Toby.
Talking about myself in the third person was probably odd, but it made it easier to reconcile with the rest of my life. Toby was the part of me that could let every care go and who over the past few months had learned how much fun it could be to bark and chase after a ball.
Toby was the part of me that Noah cuddled and petted and cared for in a way the human side didn’t always want to stand still for. Over the past few months, I’d come to understand why Noah had been drawn to the lifestyle.
We weren’t the most traditional couple when it came to puppy play, but we’d found a way to make it work for us.
“Am I turning around and heading home or pulling in the parking lot? We’re almost there.” Noah honestly seemed like he would be okay with whatever I chose, but I knew what he wanted.
Hell, I knew what I wanted, it just seemed to be easier for him to admit it.
“Pull in and park.” I wasn’t going to let my nerves or possibly embarrassment stop me from trying something that we both wanted.
“But we don’t have to stay if we don’t like it. Right? I know the owners seemed nice, but if we don’t like the other people, we leave.” Noah’s worries were finally starting to show, and it probably made me a bad person, but hearing his fears soothed some of my own.
“There are going to be lots of other handlers for you to talk to. You’re going to have just as good a time as I will.” It was going to be fine.
There had to at least one other Dom pup and sub handler, right?
The first time I’d called myself a Dom, Noah had grinned from ear to ear. He’d said “I told you so” more times that one week than in our entire marriage. Of course, that meant we’d experimented with different kinds of punishments, since he’d been so naughty.
We’d learned that while he loved spankings, they weren’t much of a deterrent for anything, and standing in the corner just made him horny.
So needless to say, we were still looking for an effective punishment.
Noah’s hand tightened on mine for a long moment before he released his grip and focused on turning into the parking lot of the almost warehouse-style building. “This is it?”
Nodding, Noah parked. “I think so.”
As he turned off the car, he pointed. “There’s the sign.”
When there was nothing left to do but get out of the car, I took a deep breath and reached for the handle. Noah smiled as he watched me but quickly followed, moving around to the back of the car to grab the duffel bag.
As we started heading for the door, Noah took my hand. I grasped for something to say. “You brought Toby’s balls?”
I knew he had, but giving us something else to focus on seemed like a good idea. Noah nodded and started going through a list of everything he’d packed. As we reached the door, and I realized he’d started going through the list a second time, I chuckled and pulled him into my arms. Wrapping my arms around him, I pulled him down and took his mouth in a heated kiss.
As he pulled back, I nibbled on his lips, making him moan. “If they don’t like us, then they can kiss my ass.”
Noah laughed and hugged me tight. “Yes, Sir.”
“Come on, baby. Let’s go meet the other pups.” Stepping back, I took hold of his hand again and reached for the handle.
****
“Great. We’re all done here, so I’ll lead you through the main lounge and show you where the changing rooms are.” Ben had an easy smile and made everything seem perfectly normal. It was clear the owner of Bound & Controlled, the BDSM club Noah had found, was used to dealing with nervous newbies.
“I’m sure we could find it if you have something more pressing you need to do.” I wasn’t going to chase the guy off if he didn’t mind showing us around, but I didn’t want him to think we were...clingy.
He shook his head, smiling as he led us through the building. “I’ve got lots of help today. So you’re stuck with me for a few more minutes.”
Noah, who probably didn’t want Ben to think he was unwelcome, spoke up. “We appreciate it. I wasn’t expecting it to be so large.”
Ben looked around the bar area we’d just walked into. The room looked a little like an old-fashioned gentlemen’s club or library without the books. It was honestly a lot classier than I’d expected. Ben was probably used to that reaction, though. “In the past, places like this were seedy and small, but we wanted a place where people would feel comfortable.”
He gestured to the couches and small seating areas that were scattered throughout the room. “Somewhere people could hang out among like-minded friends.”
Judging by the number of people that were scattered around the room, Ben had succeeded. When Noah had first talked about a BDSM group for puppy play, I’d been surprised, but also a little skeptical that there would be enough people to have a meeting.
This was beyond my expectations.
There was a mix of ages and races and just about every type of person imaginable. Smaller pups who reminded me a bit of yappy dogs running around made up the biggest group, but there were also bigger, quiet ones that seemed content to watch the chaos.
The handlers also seemed to be a mix of people, from guys in business suits to a biker-looking guy in leather gear who was sweet-talking a pup who looked like it was some kind of poodle. Just seeing the mix of people made it easier to see that we might not stick out even if the average pup around the room clearly seemed more submissive.
Dobermans were never submissive, right? Several of the guard dog type pups seemed decidedly on the more dominant side of the spectrum, but it might just be how it looked before I got into the right headspace. Also, since there was really no way to ask, mulling over it didn’t matter in the slightest.
I knew I was staring too long but Ben didn’t seem to mind me taking it in, and I had a feeling Noah needed a moment as well. Even a quick glance over at him showed his wide eyes absorbing every sight and sound.
Before I could find the words to get us moving toward the changing rooms, we were jostled by a very bouncy young guy with eyes just as wide as Noah’s. He seemed to have been turning in circles or possibly walking backward when he slammed into us, but he quickly turned back around, focusing that surprise and excitement on us.
“I’m sorry. I got ahead of them and they’re going too slow and did you see how many people there are here?” He paused long enough to look around Noah before focusing back on us.
“Are you pups too? I mean one of you is probably a pup if you’re going to hang out here, right? Sawyer’s going to lose his mind. He kept saying there probably wouldn’t be many people here. I wonder if that will make it easier for him to get naked. Do you see the naked pup? Jackson said I probably should wear shorts, but that one isn’t. Isn’t he cute? I love his tail. It sparkles. Do you have a tail? Wait. Which of you is the pup?” His sugar-high gaze bounced back and forth between us while Ben just stood there trying not to chuckle.
Noah couldn’t seem to decide what to say to the overexcited young man. When it was obvious I needed to take charge, I cleared my throat and tightened my hold on Noah. “I am.”
“Oh, you’re going to be a cute
pup too, but you don’t seem excited. Are you nervous? Sawyer’s nervous, but I’m not. I love getting to be a pup. We’ve got an obstacle course at home I get to run through, but Sawyer just likes to cuddle as a pup. Wait. I bet you’re a cuddly pup too.” His eyes sparkled as he turned his smile on Noah.
“Are you his master? You don’t seem like a master. Not that there’s anything wrong with being a different kind of master. My master’s cuddly too, but he likes throwing the ball for me. Do you throw the ball for—” We’d been so bowled over by the almost manic excitement in front of us that we hadn’t noticed the other two men walk over until the more mature of the three wrapped his arm around the chatty one and put his hand over his mouth.
That stopped the crazy one cold, and he glanced up at the man, a loving smile in his eyes. The man just laughed. “What did I say about walking off?”
As he removed his hand, the chatterbox shook his head. “You said not to be rude or a nuisance or to ask too many personal questions and said not to touch anyone no matter how pretty their tail is. No one said I couldn’t look around.”
That had the other young man snorting and rolling his eyes. “Jackson’s not going to fall for that.”
The talkative one grinned. “Maybe he’ll punish me for being naughty.”
Ben burst out laughing, drawing the trio’s attention. The man who seemed to be somewhere around forty reached out his hand toward Ben. “I’m sorry we interrupted.” As we all shook hands, he stared down the bouncy one who seemed to be trying to wander off again. “Cooper is sorry too.”
Cooper, the excitable one, didn’t seem sorry. He did, however, seem curious and a tad eager. Since pointing that out wouldn’t help, I shrugged as I shook his hand. “Not a problem.”
Noah smiled as he shook the man’s hand when it was his turn. “We were just getting to know each other.”
That seemed to be Cooper’s cue to begin his manic interrogation again. He focused on Noah. “Are you a master?”
