by Melody Rose
I visibly relaxed as they spoke. I knew they were right, just as I knew I had been right before. This was still an unfamiliar situation for me that I just wasn’t comfortable with yet.
“Were you worried, little owl?” Daath asked, rubbing my arm.
I sighed and nodded. “I was.”
“But you made quite a good point last we spoke about this,” Syrion tilted his head. “You were right.”
“I know,” I laughed. “But it’s just unfamiliar territory to me. I never want to do anything to jeopardize my relationship with you two.”
“We trust that you won’t.” The white-haired angelic looking man smiled at me. I couldn’t help but blush a bit just from his smile.
“How do you feel about him?” Daath asked. “Honestly.”
I looked down and pondered this for a moment. I wasn’t quite sure. I’d found myself physically attracted to him for a while, but being with him… it felt deeper than mere sexual fulfillment. It was nowhere close to rivaling what I had with Daath and Syrion, but it didn’t seem meaningless…
“Honestly,” Syrion echoed the word, “it doesn’t matter. All that matters is that our relationship is as strong to you as it is to us.”
I smiled at him and squeezed his hand. “You both mean the world to me. Nothing will change that.”
Daath took my other hand, and I looked at him. “Then, nothing else really matters.”
I smiled, feeling both relief and just plain adoration for the two men on either side of me. “I love you.” I turned to repeat the phrase to Syrion. “I love you both so much.”
“We love you,” Syrion leaned his head against my forehead.
Daath kissed my shoulder. “We love you too.”
18
Kalian
I ascended the steps to the Moonstone Castle with a strange shift in my mood. This place had felt aggressive to me since I moved in, and I felt angry for it, but that aggression seemed almost completely gone now. I considered that there was a chance I had imagined it all because of my own frustration with Myrcedes, as well as the possibility that I had been a dick to her just because I found her attractive. I’d like to think that was all that it was, though to be honest, I suppose I never really trusted her.
When we’d first met, I’d brushed her off as some whore for the Kings. She quickly made it obvious that she was far too intelligent and powerful for that as she insisted on braving the Jewel Palace, a place where she was top of Minerva’s hit list, just to save them. I had respect for that. I had spent thousands of years serving Minerva, however. As drastic and wrong as I knew she was, I never wanted to see her hurt. I made sure when we devised the plan that she would come out safely. She was maniacal, but she was my Queen. I couldn’t deny that I had affection for her, a desire to protect her, and I felt guilty breaking that in the first place.
Then Myrcedes killed her. I’d gone to so much trouble to make sure my own crime was as harmless as possible, that Minerva would come out completely unscathed, but upon hearing how Minerva had killed Myrcedes’ family and hidden her true destiny from her, the purple-haired woman reduced my Queen to ash like she was nothing more than a scrap of paper. I didn’t necessarily think Myrcedes’ actions were unwarranted, but still. It had been difficult for me to trust her, especially as I tried to rationalize the fact that I found her so compelling.
I didn’t want to say that everything felt different now because I got to sleep with her, but rather the change came from letting down the wall I’d been careful to keep up for the past month or so.
“Well, someone looks like they just got laid.”
I stopped dead in my tracks and sighed, looking over at the sex demon. “Hello, Siena.”
She was pushing a cart of food and treats, and she was clad in her usual strips of gold fabric, an outfit I wasn’t much of a fan of personally. As Minerva’s army General, the Queen knew I was in a vulnerable position. She’d spent a few decades exposing me to a concentration of magic and manipulative tactics of sex demons, sirens, and similar creatures whose mere purpose for existence was persuasion, so I wasn’t receptive to Siena’s attempts to seduce me, which seemed never-ending.
“So who’s the lucky bird?” Siena bit her lip and raised an eyebrow in anticipation. “Come on, you can tell me. This is my forte.”
“What are you up to?” I wanted to change the subject as fast as possible.
“Oh, come on,” she trailed her black nail gently along my arm. “I wanna know. Whoever she was, she put a smile on your face that I haven’t seen before. I bet I could do the same if you’d take a ride…” She leaned up to whisper in my ear, which only served to make me tense and wildly uncomfortable.
The good thing about sex demons was that they could sense when their advances were falling flat. After a moment, she pulled away and returned to leaning on her cart.
“I’ll get you one day, pretty boy,” she winked.
I relaxed when she moved away from me and sighed. “So, what are you up to with that?”
“Hm? Oh, the reaper from the fae world is here to speak with the Kings. This is for her.”
I felt myself perk up considerably when she mentioned that. I hadn’t met the reaper, and I knew she wasn’t a Seelie, but she was still a fae, and they had sent her to help take care of my home. “Are you on your way to see her now?”
“Yes. Are you looking for dessert, General?” she smirked.
“Can I come with you?”
The sex demon shrugged. “Sure, come on. You’re no fun.” She pouted and resumed pushing the cart. I made a point to walk next to her so she couldn’t insinuate that I was trying to look at her ass.
“How long is she here for?”
“Not sure… at least a few hours. It depends on what the Kings need from her. Have you met her?”
“No, not yet.”
“Reapers are a strange breed. I like Myrcedes, of course, but she’s different. They’re mostly loners. Serriah’s like that.”
“What is she again? A brownie, or-”
“An elf.”
“Right.” I wasn’t usually a fan of elves, but I told myself that she deserved the benefit of the doubt, as well as my utmost respect.
Siena knocked on a large door before opening it. “Yoo-hoo! Serriah! I have some food for you.”
I followed the sex demon into a small meeting room with a table in the middle and about eight chairs around it. Sat on the far side of the table was a woman who looked young, but I didn’t trust that. Elves were particularly youthful. Her ears were sharp enough to be considered weapons and peeked through the thick curly locks of hair. Her skin was dark brown, but her eyes were gold, like mine. Fae eye colors were usually golden, brown, blue, or white, but gold was the more common shade. Something about sharing an eye color with the unfamiliar fae comforted me. I knew no matter where I was, I was still the same creature with the same home, just like she was.
“And a visitor,” the elf added.
“Yes!” Siena grinned. “This is Kal-”
“You’re the General,” she interrupted the sex demon. “The one they banished?”
I swallowed hard and nodded. “Yes. Kalian.”
“Nice to meet you,” she nodded. “Serriah.”
I nodded back at her. Siena looked back and forth between the two of us before giving an awkward smile. “Well… I’ll be going then. Come find me if you need anything else, Serriah. I don’t know when the Kings will be back, unfortunately.” She nodded slowly, and both Serriah and I looked at her until she backed out of the room and shut the door.
When we were alone, Serriah looked at me patiently.
“Would you mind if I asked you about the state of things at home?” I asked. I’d only had more questions after my conversation with Pukk the night before.
“No.” She got up and walked over to the cart, filling a plate with smoked ham and some fresh vegetables.
“No, as in… no, I can’t?” I blinked, feeling nervous for no discernible rea
son.
“No,” she chuckled, sitting back down, paying me no more mind than was necessary. “No, as in no, I don’t mind. Sit. Eat. Ask.”
“Oh, alright.” I grabbed a plate and a bit of food and sat down a few chairs away from her, not knowing where to start. “What’s going on there?”
“Nothing helpful,” she spoke in between bites. “The council has been deadlocked. And now, one by one, fewer and fewer of them have been showing up to meetings or making public appearances. The citizens of the realm don’t know why, and they don’t care. They feel abandoned and scared. Many of them dislike having an elf in charge. You understand that, don’t you?”
I froze and looked up at her, tense. “I-I don’t know what… have I done something to offend you?”
She shrugged, not a trace of anger or malice in her face. I was impressed with that. “Not recently.”
I waited in silence for her to elaborate, but she didn’t. “Then, when?”
“About twenty-five hundred years ago, I think? When Minerva tried to impose restrictions on elven living, travel, and reproduction.” I looked down at my plate and felt her eyes on me. “Yeah, it wasn’t a good time.”
“How do you know about that?” I looked at her curiously. Elves lived life spans only a few decades longer than humans. It was the only saving grace from that debacle that no one whom it affected was still around to talk about it. “How old are you?”
“There are records all over the universe of histories that some people would rather forget,” she shrugged. “Those records will outlive you and me both. We all make mistakes. You can’t erase them the way you wish you could.”
I felt a chill as she spoke. “I was wrong. And I regret supporting her. I know that doesn’t excuse-”
“You don’t have to apologize to me,” she shrugged. The elf remained cool despite the nature of the conversation and my own nervous demeanor. “Truly. I noticed the look on your face when you came in. You think my ears are disgusting.” She laughed. Why was she laughing? “Very well. That’s fine. But I know you’re not looking to support genocide.”
I felt terribly confused. So, she wasn’t upset? Then what was the point of bringing it up?
“Kalian,” Serriah twirled a fork around on her plate as she spoke with acute precision, and I was surprisingly mesmerized by the action, “I just wish to point out that when the time comes for you to resume your place in the army, I hope you’ll keep that in mind. Your actions will last. Just like those council members, everything you stand for matters.”
I felt defensive and wanted to find a point to argue with her on, but I knew there was no benefit to that. She was right. I hadn’t had to face my mistakes in a serious manner. I’d been protected from consequences by Minerva and my position. Perhaps I deserved this time of banishment to atone for that. Besides, I couldn’t help but take comfort in the way she worded her advice; she seemed so confident that I would regain my place in the army.
“Thank you,” I nodded.
She smiled, clearly a bit surprised that I’d been so receptive. “I’m eighty-four.”
“Oh,” I blinked. She did look young for her age.
“Don’t be so shocked,” she laughed. Her laugh was deep and full-bellied. It was the only thing I’d noticed so far that seemed to betray her age. There was wisdom in it, a knowledge that things could be laughed off and temporary. I got the frustrating feeling that despite my being several hundred thousand years old, this elf I’d looked down on had more sense than I did.
“You just look much younger.”
“Well,” the youthful woman shrugged. “We don’t age after about thirty.”
Right. It was easy to forget since their lifespans were more similar to humans, but the two species couldn’t be more different.
“So… about the fae realm… People are getting worried, yes?”
“Very.” She got up and crossed back to the cart, pouring herself a cup of coffee out of a golden carafe. I looked closer at what she was pouring it into and realized she had a very squatty looking mug that was clearly from Earth that read ‘Have some ELF Confidence!’ with two comically large ears illustrated on either side of the text. She seemed to be such a buttoned-up person, but there was much whimsy that had been betrayed in the last few moments. “The fae are scared. The oldest Unseelie in the world is reduced to ash, and then an agent of Death starts telling people she’s in charge? I can understand where their fears come from.” She chuckled. “I’m doing my best.”
“What are you meeting with the Kings about?”
“Just to give them a status report. They were supposed to be here a bit ago, but apparently, they got called off last minute.”
I frowned, wondering if everything was alright. My mind immediately went to Myrcedes. “I hope I’m not intruding.”
She shrugged. “Not at all. Don’t get much company in the fae world right now, anyway.”
“Don’t reapers like alone time?”
She looked at me and cocked her head. “Depends on the reaper. But even liking alone time is different from isolation.”
“Oh,” I felt my cheeks get hot, feeling rude. “I’m sorry-”
She waved me off and shrugged, leaning against the table. “No need. You didn’t know. Just the state of things.” She took a drink from her strange little coffee mug and sighed. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been in the fae world for more than a visit. If I’m honest, I’d hoped there would have been more change.”
“What do you mean?”
“People are the same.” Serriah shook her head. I tried not to stare at her ears as they moved back and forth with the gesture. A wave of realization hit me at that moment that I was most likely part of whatever problem she was referring to. “Seelie and Unseelie are considered beautiful, perfect, adored. Brownies, elves, any other kind of fae are mistrusted. But at least we’re still fae. The way some of those creatures talk about non-fae…”
An alarm bell sounded in my head. “Bahz.”
Her eyebrow cocked up in a serious manner.
“What’s going on with Bahz?” I questioned.
She set down her mug. “Your Lieutenant… he’s taken your title. I suppose you must have expected that. He’s also been very vocal about his distrust for me. His political opinions are a hot topic for gossip these days.”
I nodded. “I heard about what happened at Pukk’s bar…”
She raised an eyebrow but then relaxed and nodded. “Yeah. It wasn’t pleasant. I’ve dealt with worse. I didn’t have to get my scythe out.” She laughed. “But he does seem to be… a problem. He’s been agitating things. People that weren’t upset before are growing more and more worried, all at his prodding. I’m doing my best to keep an eye on him, but he’s succeeded at making that difficult.”
“How has he -”
I was interrupted by the doorknob rattling suddenly. The door swung open, and there stood Daath and Syrion, the two of them barely visible within the door frame. I couldn’t help but think they were so dramatic in every aspect, even their dress shirts. Daath wore black, and Syrion wore white, just like their hair… as if they were so committed to this monochromatic nonsense. Actually, every article of clothing, down to their shoes and cartoonish capes, matched their hair. If I wasn’t slightly terrified of them, I might have rolled my eyes. I pictured myself walking around in all shimmery gold garb, like my hair. It was ridiculous.
“Hello sirs,” Serriah bowed her head.
“Sorry to keep you waiting,” Daath said as they entered. They weren’t much taller than I was and I was just as fit as they were, but their presence seemed to take up most of the room when they entered. It didn’t hurt that they quite literally had shadow and light surrounding them. They both eyed me, and while I tried to discern any sort of contempt or anger in their faces, I found nothing. They were as expressionless as usual. I wondered if they knew what I had done earlier with their Queen? I wondered if it mattered.
“Kalian,” Daath nodded
at me. “Thank you for keeping our guest company.”
“My pleasure. I’ll excuse myself so you can carry on.” I grabbed the plate I’d made and hardly touched as I headed for the door.
Syrion thanked me on the way out and shut the door behind me. I heard his voice as I left the room. “Where did you get that hideous coffee cup?”
I bit my lip as I reflected on what Serriah had said about the fae realm. It felt wrong to not be there… but would it feel worse to be there and feel helpless?
I began to make my way to the kitchen and rounded the hallway when I saw a mess of bright purple hair before me. “Myrcedes?”
She turned and smiled when she saw me. “Kalian! What are you up to?” She ran up to me and hugged me, and I wrapped my free arm around her.
Relief flooded my body when I saw her happy expression, and I returned her smile, which was more refreshing than I’d expected. So often, when she smiled at me, I found myself forcing annoyance or frustration, trying to keep a lid on anything I might have felt for her. For the first time, I felt free to express the fact that seeing her face brought a smile to mine. Of course, nothing had stood in the way of doing so before besides my own hubris, but the change still felt monumentally relieving despite being so innocent.
“I’m returning dishes to Gloria,” I informed her, holding up my plate as evidence.
“I’m starving!” she replied, “I’ll come with you.”
I nodded and continued walking, quickly engrossed back in my thoughts. It took me a second to realize that Myrcedes was speaking to me.
“… so I just wanted to let you know- Kalian?”
“Hm? Yeah,” I nodded. “I’m sorry, I’m still drained from the work we did earlier, at the bridge. Just… yeah.”
She stopped when we reached the staircase, and I looked back at her. “Coming?”
“Kal,” she tilted her head. I felt the word hit me like a pallet of bricks. Something about the way she said that was so… genuine. So concerned. I couldn’t remember ever being referred to that way in my thousands of years. “Are you really okay? Are you upset about…”
