“There’s no one that you can give the information to?” Elijah turned, his eyes narrowed. “As the oldest, you felt responsible for all of us. Somehow in your head you’re now responsible for every kid in the world.”
“Not every kid, but this one. You don’t get it. You never even left this town.”
“Really? You’re still the big bad older brother and I don’t deserve to—”
“Stop.”
“Okay. Fine. So what about the guys you work with? Your special ops buddies? Isn’t there a whole team of you?”
Xavier sighed. “Yes. They’re busy. There’s a lot of cases. I was there, I know the people in this camp. How they work.”
“And none of them can get this done? You’ve got the information, you give it to the right people, you follow up, you’re doing your job. Without abandoning your wife and boys.”
“I’m not abandoning them.” Through gritted teeth, he pronounced each word. “I’ll be back, hopefully by Christmas.”
“You’re serious?” Elijah stared at him. “You think if you leave now Selena’s gonna be waiting for you? You’ve been given a second chance, and you’re walking away.”
Xavier could see the disgust on his face. Elijah had never looked at him that way before. This twisted him just as badly as Oliver’s cries.
With a heavy sigh, Elijah leaned back. “Man, I always admired you. Wanted to be just like you. You pulled me through the darkest days of my life. Because of you, I was in a good place with God. When Jazmine came back, I was ready. I was ready to be the man she needed, ready to be the father that Rosie needed.”
Riff cleared his throat. “It’s none of my business, but everyone expects different things from life. Maybe you need to back off and let Xavier and Selena work this out. She’s strong and independent.”
Elijah scoffed. “You’re the reason she thinks it’s okay to be second-best in her husband’s life.”
The older man’s knuckles went white around the steering wheel.
Xavier resisted the urge to rub at the pressure building in his head. If he took a few deep breaths, the headache would go away.
Shaking his head, Elijah turned his attention back to Xavier. “All I’m saying is that I couldn’t have done that without you. Now I have a better understanding of our issues. Instead of alcohol, you hide. You run around saving the world when your family needs you.” Elijah sat back and gazed out the window. His disappointment and frustration filled the Jeep.
Riff stopped to allow a man to jog by with his dog. Then a young woman with a stroller followed.
Less than a mile and they would turn onto the bridge that would take him over the bay and away from the coast. Away from his family. Xavier let out a heavy breath and leaned his head back. “Those kids need me out there. Whenever I close my eyes, I hear their cries. There are so many.”
Elijah sighed. “I don’t know what to tell you, man. You’re saving the world. But there’s more than one way to do that. You have a family and if you don’t think they need you, then you’re missing the whole point. I learned the hard way that we De La Rosa men need our families as much as they need us, if not more. Your father isolated us, made it dangerous to need anyone. Xavier, you need them more than you know.”
“I’ve never denied that I needed her. I might need them too much. I get too comfortable and then I get angry and frustrated. I can’t do the perfect nine-to-five husband bit.”
“Selena doesn’t expect you to be perfect. She’s proven that she loves your stupid self the way you are. Sometimes the most courageous thing we can do is just stand there. Being there for your family doesn’t mean being the perfect hero. We aren’t gonna say or do the right thing a bunch of the time. You stay, and you love them and then you trust God. You have to win her love. Earn it, and when you do, life will be better than you ever imagined.”
There was a red light at the last intersection before the bridge. “Don’t cross that bridge. God’s given you a gift with Selena and the boys.”
“It’s who I am. I can’t change.” The bigger truth was that she deserved better.
“Who told you that? Because it’s absolute hogwash.”
Xavier glanced at Riff. His father-in-law cleared his throat and shifted a guilty look to the beach side. “People are who they are. We don’t change.” He mumbled.
“I changed.” Elijah made a disgruntled sound. “I was a falling-down drunk who threw temper tantrums. God made me a new man. Riff, what made you stay here after a lifetime of being on the road?”
“Not the same. My daughter needed me. Plus, I was getting too old for sleeping on a bus.”
“So, you changed. Someone needed you and you found a new purpose.” He looked Xavier straight in the eyes. “I’m not telling you that you have to change, just to think why you say you can’t.”
“What if I do love her? What, then?”
“You show her by being there for her and living a life together, supporting each other. You spend every day thanking God for her and all the wonderful things she brings into your miserable life.”
He opened the back door but paused halfway out. “We have a history of avoiding, running and hiding to survive our childhood. I hid in drink and drove the people I love away. You run off and save the world. It’s a much nobler choice than mine, but it has the same results. The people we claim to love can’t trust us to be there for them.”
The light turned green and the car behind them honked. Before Riff could hit the gas, Elijah stepped out of the car with a little salute. He didn’t give them another glance as he hit the sidewalk and headed back toward town.
Xavier closed his eyes. There were so many things that Elijah was right about. He loved Selena. Without her his life was hollow.
He had been running or hiding.
His cousin, his best friend and, in all truth, his brother had lived through the same horrific childhood. They had stood side by side as they’d grown from boys to men.
There was nothing to hide from him.
Elijah had just called him a coward. The doubt hit hard, creating a new rhythm in his head.
A screech of tires pulled him out of his thoughts. He looked up and saw a red blur appear from the left. He instinctively reached for Riff to protect him but before he could, the Jeep was violently knocked off its path. The crash vibrated in his ears. In his head, though, it was more like an explosion that lifted them off the ground. Screams and shouts mingled with the sounds of the jungle.
The boy was under him, crying. No, no, no. He was so close to getting home. He had to get to Selena. Hold her. Be the husband she needed.
It wasn’t supposed to end like this. He didn’t have his wedding ring on. She wouldn’t know how much he loved her.
The detail of every thought the day of the attack hit his brain hard.
He wanted out. He wanted to go home and stay. Sweat ran down his back from the fires surrounding them. The boy cried. Xavier was trapped. He twisted to check the driver, and everything went black.
“Xavier. Xavier.”
Blinking, he turned toward the voice that pierced his vivid memory. Riff. His father-in-law looked at him and Xavier turned to gauge his surroundings. He was in Port Del Mar. And it wasn’t an explosion. It was a crash. A car had run a red light and hit them. It sat in the middle of the road, its front collapsed inward.
The Jeep had spun to the side of the road and now sat facing the opposite direction. Cracks spiderwebbed across the windshield. The passenger door behind the driver was caved in, the back window gone.
“Are you okay, Riff?” he asked, turning to the driver.
His father-in-law nodded. His hands shook. “It just came out of nowhere.”
Xavier’s door opened. Elijah stood there, all the color gone out of his face. “I saw it happen, but I couldn’t— Are you guys okay?”
They
both nodded. Xavier got out of the car, then jogged to the red sedan. Inside a young man sat, stunned, his hands on the wheel as blood dripped from a cut on the bridge of his nose. “I’m sorry. I just looked down. I...”
“You okay?”
“Yeah.” He looked up, his eyes wide. “I just... My mom’s going to kill me.”
Elijah ran up next to him. “I called it in.”
They got the car off the road and waited for the police to arrive.
He had been coming home. That was his last job. “Elijah, do you have your truck close by?”
“Yeah, it’s at the Painted Dolphin.”
“I need to do something. I need you to drive me across the bridge.”
“After all this, that’s all you can think about? Selena is going to—”
“I’m not leaving. But I need to get a few things before I tell her.” He turned to Riff. “Don’t tell her that I’m staying. Just let her know everything’s all right. It’s going to be all right.”
Elijah scowled at him. “Are you sure you’re okay? No one is this happy after a car accident.” He pointed to Xavier’s head. “Did you get hurt? Do you need to see one of your doctors?”
Xavier grinned. “I’m better than okay. Will you take me, or do I need to call Belle?”
“I’ll take you. Where are we going?”
He winked at Elijah, then pulled out his phone to call Trent. He went to roll his wedding ring with his thumb, but it wasn’t there. He wanted it back and to never take it off again. Selena would come first. She was his heart.
His mission work would all be from home.
While he talked to Trent and Beto, the tow trucks and police arrived. He slipped the phone into his back pocket and answered the questions for the report.
As they climbed into Elijah’s truck, doubt twisted his happy mood.
Everyone knew the truth. Selena was too good for him. Playing father for a few weeks was not a lifetime commitment and didn’t prove anything. The boys were so well-adjusted and smart, they didn’t need him. Maybe they were better off without him.
He had been taught to be the strongest in the room, to never open up or admit weakness. The man who had taught him that was gone. He’d been wrong about almost everything.
Xavier sighed. “So, um...” Why was this so hard? “Did you have doubts about what kind of father you’d be when you found out about your daughter?”
Elijah’s laughter filled the car. “Yes. And if you don’t believe me, ask Jazz. I actually sent her away, thinking it would be better for them. I was scared. My mother abandoned us, I never even knew my father, and I was raised by Frank. But, Xavier, we’re not our parents. Frank was the closest I had to a father and he was a miserable, lonely man who took all his anger and insecurities out on us. God didn’t mean for us to be like that. We’re not.”
Elijah gave him a solemn glance. “And we have each other. Belle set me straight. We’d never let you do anything to harm those boys or Selena. Not that you would, but we have backup. We have each other, just like we did growing up. Your boys will be better men because you’ll show them how, by the way you love their mother. By the way you treat them.”
Xavier’s heart lightened. He was far from being the perfect husband, but he could show his boys that he was strong enough to stand with their mother. Strong enough to get on his knees and give it all to God.
Now if only Selena would agree to stand with him again.
Chapter Sixteen
Selena parked the car at her house and rested her head on the steering wheel. It had been a long day with the city council and chamber of commerce people. Doug Mason had complained for over an hour about the Christmas event and how it had ruined the grass, and then he and Phyllis had got in a fight over the budget for the upcoming fishing tournament marketing plan. Usually Selena found humor in small town politics, but not so much today.
Her dad’s car wasn’t in its place. Xavier was gone...again.
Being hurt and angry made her feel petty. Those stupid arguments over trampled grass and advertising dollars were so pointless when children needed a safe place to sleep.
What she needed right now was her boys. Jazmine had taken them today since her dad was driving Xavier to the airport. She called her. “Hey, lady. Are you at the house? I’m going to come pick the boys up.”
“Oh, I don’t have them. Um, Elijah took them to your place.”
“His SUV isn’t here.”
“Go in and check. Maybe there’s a note. Oh. My mom’s calling. Gotta go.” She hung up before Selena could say another word.
Puzzled, Selena looked at her phone. “That was weird.” With a frown, she climbed out of her car and went to the house. The boys were safe with Elijah, but where were they?
At the door she paused. On the welcome mat was a piece of paper with red scribbles all over it.
Picking it up, she flipped it over. In bold print was one word: HELLO. It kind of looked like her father’s writing.
Frowning, she went inside. In the middle of the hallway was another piece of toddler art. COME.
With the two papers in her hand, she moved down the hall, searching for another clue. Her heart was racing. The paper trail continued at the entryway to the kitchen.
The word TO was surrounded by a purple design. That had to be Finn. For the last month, purple had been the only color he would use.
In front of the pantry door, she found THE. Looking to the mudroom, she saw the final paper taped to the door. It read BACKYARD.
She took a deep breath and made sure to keep her expectations down. Maybe her father had something special planned with the boys to remind her how wonderful life was, even without Xavier.
Easing the door open, she stepped into the screened-in porch. The toys had been put up in the wicker containers and everything organized. A beautiful poinsettia stood on the table.
Under the flowerpot was a folded piece of paper. “Please join us by the gate. Love, Finn, Sawyer and Oliver.”
A tear fell onto the paper. Her father’s handwriting. Her family wanted her to be happy. Either her dad or Elijah had had the boys do something for her. How could she waste time being sad when there were so many blessings in her life?
With a smile, she tucked the invitation into her pocket and made her way to the stone sidewalk.
Standing by the garden gate, the boys looked adorable in their little plaid shirts and red suspenders. When they saw her, they ran. “Twees. We pwaned Kismas twees!”
“You planted Christmas trees?” She glanced up at her father. “What’s going on? Where’s your car?” Then she looked again. “What happened to your face?”
He touched the Band-Aid across the bridge of his nose. “Oh, we had a little bit of an accident. But we’re all fine. You’re back a little earlier than we expected.”
Confused, she shook her head. “Accident?” She went down to hug the boys. “The boys? Who’s ‘we’?”
“A car hit us as we were heading out of town. The Hicks kid ran a red light. Not sure if the car is going to be totaled, but like I said, no one was hurt. I got the worst of it. Xavier don’t have a scratch.”
“The twee, Mama.” Finn touched her face.
“Okay, sweetheart.” Tilting her face up, she looked at her father. “Elijah was with you? I don’t understand what’s going on.”
“He’s stalling for me.” Xavier came up behind them.
She spun on her heels. “You’re here.” Her lungs froze. He hadn’t left. “Are you okay? Did the accident cause you to miss the plane?”
Standing, she held Sawyer closer. Anything to keep her from reaching out to Xavier. If she held him now, she might never let go.
“No. It brought back a lot of memories, though.” He picked up Oliver. “But we can talk about that later. Right now, the boys and I have something to show you.”
>
She followed him to the side yard. Between the house and sidewalk were three small cypress trees, freshly planted. Each one was wrapped in lights and had a big red bow.
Oliver slipped from his arms and ran to the tree on the far right. “My twee! Feeds bwuds.”
Xavier laughed. “We have ornaments that are made from birdseed so that they’ll visit the trees.”
“Look, Mama. Look at my twee.” Sawyer pulled at her hand.
She followed, her brain too muddled to comprehend what was going on. The boys smiled at her. “I love these trees.” She went to her knees. “One for each of you.”
They nodded. “We wove you.” Finn hugged her.
New tears burned her eyes. “Oh, sweetheart. I love you, too.”
Finn ran to Sawyer, laughing, then scooted around the tree, only falling once. His brother yelled, then gave chase once Finn was back on his feet.
Oliver hugged her around the neck and kissed her cheek. “Don’t cwy.”
“It’s okay. They’re Mama’s happy tears,” she reassured him. She patted his bottom. “Go get your brothers.” He grinned, then took off to join whatever game they were playing.
Tilting her head, she gazed up at Xavier. “What’s this all about?”
He held out his hand. She took it and stood. He didn’t drop her hand and she didn’t pull it away. “Have you postponed the mission?”
“No. Trent’s going in. I’m staying here.”
“What?” She touched his face, searching for any injuries. “Were you hurt? Is it your head?”
With a grin, he leaned in closer. She started moving in, too, but stopped herself and pulled away. “Xavier. You’re scaring me.”
Over his shoulder, her father was laughing at the boys as they tumbled around, trying to jump over Luna. Her head was between her paws, but her tail hadn’t stopped wagging.
Everyone was so happy. It was like she’d stepped into an alternate world from this morning. He dropped her hand and touched her face, brushing back the strands of hair that had fallen out of her clip. “Right before the bridge, we were T-boned. It jarred memories of the attack.”
The Texan's Surprise Return Page 17
