by A. Marie
He drops his gaze between us, dragging his eyes up my body until they hit mine. I clear my throat, fidgeting in his hold. “Go riding with us tomorrow.”
“No.”
“Why? You didn’t like riding with me?”
“You should take whatever flavor you were testing last night riding instead.”
“Jealousy looks good on you, babe. What about that prep-douche you had over, huh?”
Gripping his shoulders, I bring my face forward, shortening the distance between us. “And yet…here we are.” He growls when I sit back again.
“I know.” His frown returns. “Look, I’m sorry. For the second time. I want to make it up to you.”
“You don’t owe me anything. I told you I just want to be civil.”
He looks down at our compromising position.
I remove one of my legs but he shoots his hand back to grip my knee, wrapping it tighter around his waist. The jostling makes my arms slide around his strong shoulders.
“I want you to ride with me tomorrow.”
I bite the inside of my bottom lip. “I can’t.”
His eyes catch on my mouth while his hand leaves the wall. Before my back touches the edge though, he drags his hand slowly up my spine pushing my chest forward until our faces are mere inches apart. My nipples pebble beneath my top as my breath catches.
“I want you with me.”
His whisper is louder than the commotion going on outside the pool, hitting me right where it shouldn’t. Drops of water drip from his flattened hair, slowly traveling down his forehead. Watching them, I have the urge to catch the errant drops with my mouth, kissing them away before they reach his eyes. I lick my bottom lip on reflex.
A large splash to our left has him spinning to glare at the culprit. With him distracted, I slip out of his grasp, bracing my arms on the pool ledge and pushing out of the water before he can stop me.
I collect my belongings, ignoring his frustrated sigh as I dash out of the gate.
On shaky legs, I make it back to my balmy apartment and immediately jump in the shower. Somehow, I feel hotter now than I did after being in the blistering sun for hours on end. I turn the water to cold, then slump against the wall.
He’s pushing closer and closer. The more I try to block him the more he just keeps coming. He’s under the impression I’m with Drew one way or another and yet he still acts interested at every turn. Drew, Beckett, and now Tony, he doesn’t want anyone else playing with the new girl, like I’m some prize. What will he do when he discovers I’m closer to trash than treasure though? Throw me away like yesterday’s garbage? It’s what my mother’s been trying to do since I was born.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel something for Coty, too. He lured me in with that sexy body that he carries with such an easy swagger. His beautiful face lights up with such wonder while his coffee-like eyes hold the more concealed emotions. His affectionate gestures are slowly becoming my undoing. He’s absolutely hypnotizing. And him living right next door…could end badly. I just don’t know for who exactly.
* * *
The next morning, I find Beckett sitting just outside our apartments eating a doughnut. He offers one to me as I pass, so taking the step below him, I sit and weigh my options. This is the third time he’s tried to offer me food and I still owe him for that chocolate bar. When he insists it’ll just go to waste, I make an exception to enjoy the jelly-filled goodness I didn’t pay for while he sips his coffee.
“Work?”
Mouth busy chewing, I nod. “You?”
“I go in later. Marc and Coty had some paperwork so they left earlier.” I take a sip of water, watching him closely. “Where do you work anyway?”
I point to the logo on my shirt.
Laughing, he says, “I never even noticed. Do you like it there?”
I shrug. “I like the tips. Lots of drama lately though.”
After regaling me with some work stories of his own, my cell rings with another UNKNOWN caller and I ignore it just like the others, wishing they’d take the hint already.
“Lover boy?”
“Nope.” I shake my head, twisting my hair into a ballerina bun then adjust my visor over my eyes. With the temperature spiking again today, I’ll need my long hair off my body.
“What’s going on with Coty?”
“You tell me, he’s your boy.”
Beckett studies me for a minute, his crystal-clear blue eyes looking for something. Something I’m sure he won’t find.
“You need to be careful with him.”
I scoff. What the hell does that mean? “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m trying to keep as much distance as this six-foot hallway will allow. I live next door, that doesn’t mean I’m up for grabs. You guys need to be careful, how about that? Just because a woman is within reach doesn’t mean you have a right to touch.” I stand, descending the stairs in a huff.
“Angela.”
I stop, surprised he’s using my actual name and not his usual nickname for me.
“I mean it. I’ve never seen him like this. He’s all over the place ever since you showed up. If you are serious about that fucking nerd-twat, then you need to make that clear to Coty.”
Sarcasm laces my every syllable. “I’ll get right on that.”
Choosing between my stepbrother and a guy I barely know. Yeah, right.
“Are you two serious?”
I shake my head at his question, at this conversation, at the entire situation.
“I gotta go.”
“Just give him a chance then.”
“Bye, Beckett.”
CHAPTER 14
Angela
Another crappy Sunday. Third one in a row to be exact. An hour into my shift I was told to go home—by Joe. He’s back from vacation along with the unease his presence brings. It was busy but he still sent me away, making me question what I did to earn his sudden spite. The uncertainty turns to irritation and I drive away fuming.
Halfway home, my phone rings but this time I answer it without even checking the screen.
“Where have you been?” My mom’s screech fills me with immediate regret. Why did I choose today of all days to pick up?
“What are you talking about?”
“You think because you move out you don’t have any responsibilities here anymore?”
Yes. “And what responsibilities are those?”
“Rent!”
I bark out a disbelieving laugh. “You’ve got to be kidding me. I pay rent where I live, which is at my apartment, away from you.”
“I raised you, you ungrateful bitch!”
“Yeah, thanks for that, but I don’t owe you anything. I let you keep the child support check even though you technically aren’t supporting me anymore. That’s more than enough.”
“All you’ve ever done is take, take, take. Take my money, take all the food, take up space in every place I’ve ever scored us, you name it. Now that you’re out from under my roof you think you’re off the hook repaying me? I’ve been paying your way for years! It’s time you return the favor.”
Favor? Is she serious? I can’t believe the crap she’s spewing. I was wondering what kind of bullshit she’d pull next but I had no idea she was busy spinning out of control trying to come up with what she could hold over my head. What she could use against me. And the best she could think of was my childhood? It shouldn’t shock me that she’s kept tabs over the years but I never thought she’d throw it in my face as an actual debt. She’s reaching, even for her. She probably knows it, too, but it’s the only leg she’s got to stand on so she’s going with it.
I’m not though.
“You’re un-fucking-believable, you know that?”
“Watch your mouth! You’re still my daughter.”
Don’t remind me.
“That’s right,” I sigh. “I am your daughter. A child you didn’t have to have, I know. You should’ve aborted me like you’ve told me a thousand times. For whatever reas
on you didn’t though and here I am. Tell me how much the abortion would’ve been and I’ll pay you that amount. Will that make things right between us?” Since not going through with it is the biggest regret of her life apparently, maybe the price tag for my birth will help her come to terms with her choice once and for all. “After that, I won’t owe you anything, anymore.”
I hate the tears that form so I blink them away, not ready to give in yet.
“Well, it’ll help but it won’t be enough. I’ve been carrying you for eighteen years. That’s a hell of a lot more than you’re offering. I gave you life after all.”
A sob rips through me before I can stop it. “Then come and take it back!”
Hanging up, I toss my phone in the cupholder, then slam my hand down on the steering wheel. I let her get to me. I let her win.
Fuck.
She got me to lose control when I’ve worked tirelessly not to. It’s a lonely place living without power and my mother thrives from having company. She welcomes the once composed into pure hysteria with open arms. She’s been pushing my entire life to get me into her manic world. I’ve always been able to stay calm and wait out the worst of it, knowing there were no alternatives. I didn’t have anywhere else to go, unlike my sister. I’d be just as unwanted with my father as I was with Rianne, and at least I already knew that evil. Better the devil you know than the one you don’t, right?
I make my way into my apartment on auto pilot without any recollection of even getting here. Trying to rein in my emotions is like separating each one into a different jar. It must be done carefully, taking complete concentration.
With a deep inhale, I glance around the small space. I finally have something that puts me out of her reach, making this studio the most sacred thing in my life.
The crap at Hot Spots and now the drama next door has been chipping away at my façade for weeks without me even realizing it. She caught me in a moment of weakness and I won’t let it happen again. I can’t.
I’ll rebuild what’s been damaged and make myself stronger. I can be strong. I will be strong. I am strong.
* * *
Groggy after being woken from a nap, I drag myself out of bed to answer my door. I’m not even surprised when I find Coty on the other side. I figured he’d come looking for an explanation for yesterday’s disappearing act. I didn’t expect him to show up bearing gifts though. He holds up plates full of the best food known to man—taco truck beef tacos. It’s too good of an offering to send him away and judging by his smug grin he knows it.
“Are you hungry?” Well, now I am. “I thought I’d bring dinner to you since you won’t let me take you out.”
I give him a once-over and, of course, he looks good. A white tank that shows his sexy tattoos with relaxed athletic shorts. He has sneakers on though foregoing his preferred barefoot look.
I open the door wider as an answer.
“You just wake up or something?” He points at my hair when I scowl, explaining, “Bed head.”
Indignantly, I continue past him to check myself in the bathroom. Seeing he’s right, I unwrap my tight bun, letting my hair fall loosely around me. It’s one of the rare occasions it’s actually holding a curl and I ignore the frizzy pieces tickling my face to rejoin him.
“If you think this is bad, you should see my sex hair.”
He just stares at me as I accept one of the plates. I thought it was a good joke. Not my best, but I’m working at half speed still. I’ll try again when I’m fully awake.
He clears his throat to suggest eating outside to which I agree instantly since the only other place to sit is my bed and that’s just not happening.
I don’t bother showing him around since it’s literally one room, so we head out on the balcony to dig through our food.
“Did you get any limes?” Pretty sure the first rule in eating taco truck fare is one must have an abundance of limes. It’s downright sacrilegious otherwise.
Thankfully, Coty pulls out a takeout container with six lime wedges.
I look up at him blankly.
“What?”
“Where are yours?”
He laughs. “We can’t share these?”
At my incredulous look he hands them over, wisely choosing to go without.
Coty breaks the comfortable silence after a while.
“How are you? I thought you’d still be working.”
I wince, ignoring his question. “So did I. I’m not sure what’s going on.”
“Hey, I’m sorry about last night if I made you uncomfortable. You said you just want to be friendly, then I pressed the issue when I shouldn’t have. We like having you as a neighbor and I’m happy to be friends with you. I don’t want you to feel like you have to avoid us.” He smiles sheepishly. “Or me specifically.”
I shrug a bare shoulder. “That’s reasonable. I like living here, too.” More than you know. “I just don’t want there to be any weirdness.”
“Zero weirdness,” he agrees.
“You won’t do your caveman routine?”
He puffs out a breath. “I’ll try my best, neighbor girl.” He winks, and I act like it wasn’t forced.
I thank him for dinner, then shift to my back, soaking up the last rays the sun is offering up for the day.
After a few minutes, I crack an eye to find Coty biting his lip, looking at the sliver of stomach peeking out between my white cut-off shorts and off-the-shoulder striped shirt. I pull my shirt down, watching as his eyes cut to mine. Busted.
He stretches out next to me on his side with his head propped up.
I close my eyes again.
“Tell me something.”
I hear him roll to his back. “Like what?”
“Anything you want, friend.”
He chuckles, but doesn’t indulge me right away.
At his prolonged silence, I open my eyes. His head is turned my way while he gazes over at me. I couldn’t look away if I tried, so I greedily take my fill of his saccharine eyes.
As soon as he speaks, I’m mesmerized by his relaxed voice. The calm cadence of his words soothes me in a way I didn’t realize I was craving. I never want him to stop. I tell him so and he obliges.
He tells me about his childhood. His school and the picture-perfect student he was even while riding dirt bikes like a hellion every weekend. He tells me about his job. He loves it but wants more. Something to give him more purpose.
He’s just getting to romantic relationships when Beckett yells from the parking lot.
We both sit up to find Beckett, Marc, and some girl standing next to the motorcycles. The guys are wearing their jackets with jeans but the girl is wearing tiny shorts and a tight tank top. Judging by the cheesy smile Beckett’s wearing, he’s more than happy with her attire. She’s putting on Beckett’s spare helmet and it reminds me of the time I wore it.
I tilt my face down on my knees watching them.
“You in or what?”
Coty shakes his head, loosely wrapping his arms around his folded legs. “Not tonight.”
My heart warms. He’s ditching his friends. For me?
They look to me.
“Hey, neighbor girl.”
“Hello again.” To Coty I say, “You should go. I don’t want you to miss out on your special Sunday night ride.”
“Will you go, too?”
I shake my head. If we’re going to be friends, I can’t ride with him. It’s too enticing. He’s too enticing. The physical contact, however ordinary they try to make it seem, clouds my judgement.
Without taking his eyes from mine, Coty calls out, “Have fun without me, boys.”
They, including Coty, do their usual “ride it” chant and then we listen as the bikes take off before I move to stand.
Coty looks up, curious.
“It’s uncomfortable out here.”
“So uncomfortable.” He chuckles. “I didn’t want to say anything.”
I grab his hands to help him stand but once he’s up, h
e doesn’t let go immediately. When I try to pull away, he unfairly uses his superior strength, gently bringing me forward again.
“Are you okay? You’re always beautiful but today you look…tired.”
Just what every woman wants to hear. “You woke me from a nap.”
He runs his hands up my wrists, then to my elbows, warming my skin.
“That’s not what I meant,” he says softly.
I quirk an eyebrow. The truth is I am tired. I’m tired of living this life that wasn’t meant to be. I can’t escape my mother’s abuse even being out from under her thumb. I’m tired of fighting to control the constant emotions working their way out. I’m tired of having to watch my every move. The rigged game that is my life has left me worn out and reeling. I’m tired of having to justify a life that I haven’t even been allowed to fully live yet.
That’s what goes through my mind when I reach up and kiss Coty on the cheek. Inhaling sharply, he presses his cheek closer.
“I could use a friend.”
“You got one.” His eyes flick between mine. “Let’s go to my place. It’s empty and has lots of seating. And a TV.”
“Hey.” I smack his arm.
“I mean it does though. You can pick a movie and I’ll make popcorn.”
Well, when he puts it like that.
I choose a comedy that I haven’t seen before but Coty swears will be my new favorite. Doubtful, considering I fall asleep halfway through.
I wake up to Coty holding me under my knees and shoulders. Too tired to argue, I snuggle in closer as he takes me back to my apartment, mindful not to bang my head against any doorways. Marc holds their door for us to pass through, then Beckett’s at mine, unlocking it with my keys I brought over. He pushes it open for us then disappears from sight.
Coty lays me down gently, tucking me into my bed.
“Goodnight, Angela.”
He presses a sweet kiss to my hair, but I’m fast asleep before I can even thank him.
What feels like only a short time later there’s knocking. Or tapping. No, definitely knocking. Incessant knocking. Knocking I wish would go away. Instead it grows louder. More demanding.
I peel my eyes open to realize the sound is coming from my door.
