Heart of the Cross

by Emily Madden

  ‘She’d love that, and speaking of my lovely wife, I’d better go rescue her from my Great Aunt Mavis, who has a tendency to chew your ear off after she’s had a few of these.’ He mimed a drinking motion, and once he left, Brie trained her attention back on Josh and Lauren.

  ‘It’s a shame they couldn’t work things out.’ Abigail was next to her, as if materialising from thin air.

  ‘Pardon?’

  ‘Josh and Lauren.’ She gave a slight nod in their direction. ‘I love my son, but he can be a little pigheaded at times. Gets that from his father,’ she said acerbically. ‘Still, I hold out hope that he will come to see that Lauren still loves him and they can patch things up. After all, you don’t throw away years together over a silly argument now, do you?’

  When Brie remained silent, Abigail added, ‘You’re a nice distraction, Brianna, but we both know that like before, whatever you have with Joshua is temporary. He’s a bit like one of your … assignments. Once you’re done, you move on.’ She vanished as stealthily as she had appeared.

  Years.

  Josh had seriously downplayed his relationship. He’d made it sound as if he and Lauren had been a short-term thing, not a years-together thing.

  Swiping a glass of champagne from a passing waiter, she headed outside. Brie’s chest was tight. Despite the cool late-afternoon air, she found it almost impossible to breathe. There was no love lost between Abigail and her, but if what she was saying was the truth, and she suspected as much, then she felt a fool. Tam had been wrong—there was a third possible reason as to why Josh had asked her along. He knew his ex-girlfriend would be there and he didn’t want to appear alone. She was a ruse, or as Abigail had pointed out, a temporary distraction.

  It wasn’t the first time in her life that she’d been that for someone, but it had never hurt as much as it did right now. It felt like someone had stuck hundreds of tiny sharp pins into her chest and they were pressing down with force.

  Because those other times, that person hadn’t been Josh.

  Nineteen

  Brianna

  Brie woke late on Sunday morning with a splitting headache. Champagne, no matter how expensive, did that to her every time without fail. She also woke up to messages from Josh, Tam and Seb. She figured she should tackle them in the order of arrival, so she dealt with Josh’s message first.

  Where did you go?

  Somewhere between her fourth and fifth (or was that fifth and sixth?) glass, Brie had ordered an Uber and seven minutes later she’d been on her way home. Josh had come back from his conversation (if that’s what it could be called) clearly on edge, but no matter how hard Brie had tried, the dynamic between them was not the same, which was why she had decided to cut her losses and go home. Yes, she had done it stealthily, but she had pulled Avery aside to thank her and wish her all the best.

  ‘When I was little, and I thought of my wedding day, the two people I wanted to be there most were Josh and you,’ Avery said, her eyes brimming. ‘The fact that it came true …’ Emotion clogged her voice. ‘I cannot tell you how much it means to me.’

  Brie felt bad leaving early then, but as she queried her decision, there were two things that propelled her to leave. The first was the notification that the Uber she had ordered was about to arrive.

  As she rushed outside, she bumped into an older man she didn’t know but recognised as someone whom Rod Cooper had introduced as a business partner.

  ‘I’m so sorry,’ Brie apologised, her head spinning slightly. She must’ve had more to drink than she realised.

  ‘No, it’s my fault,’ he said with a lopsided smile. ‘I’m getting clumsy in my old age.’

  If Brie hadn’t been so intent on escaping, she would’ve laughed and told him that he was in no way old, and that would’ve been the truth. The man looked to be in his late fifties, maybe slightly older, but he was handsome with a likeness to Rob Lowe and appeared to be fit.

  ‘I was, ah, sorry to hear about your grandmother.’

  Brie blinked. She was caught off guard and the man could tell.

  ‘You’re Brianna, right?’ There was something in his tone that made Brie contemplate asking how he knew Rosie, but she was desperate to leave; she could see Lauren walking up to where Josh and his mother were waltzing on the dance floor. Abigail willingly stepping aside and allowing Lauren to take her place cemented her decision.

  ‘I’m sorry, Mr …?’

  ‘Ryan. Robert Ryan.’

  ‘I have to go.’

  And so she did, but now she needed to deal with the fallout. She stared at the blinking cursor, her mind a total blank. She needed a casual, believable reply.

  Sorry. Had a killer headache coming on. Needed to leave quickly.

  Tam’s message was short and sweet.

  So???

  Brie sighed. How was she going to tell Tam that her efforts were completely wasted? She decided to ponder her response as she read Seb’s message, which was the easiest to deal with.

  Your equipment should be arriving this week.

  At least that was something to look forward to. Brie lay in bed for a while longer knowing that she needed to deal with her headache when Josh’s message came through.

  You shouldn’t have left.

  A moment later, three little dots appeared. Josh was writing another message and Brie held her breath, waiting, and then they disappeared. She’d read somewhere that those dots were called anxiety dots. Now she knew why. What had Josh started to write?

  Dragging herself out of bed, she hit the shower, letting the warm water sluice down her body and telling herself it didn’t matter what Josh was going to say, it didn’t matter that she still had feelings for him after all these years.

  Once you’re done, you move on. Abigail’s words echoed in her mind. Abigail may be an evil witch, but she was an astute one. It’s what she did, wasn’t it?

  She towel-dried her hair and padded downstairs in search of food. It was only after she’d raided the entire contents of the fridge and pantry that it occurred to her she hadn’t actually had breakfast at home yet—most mornings she’d either skipped it or been to Albi & Ruby’s. Considering she needed to get back to Tam and she was dying for caffeine, she headed to the café.

  It was standing room only. Every single table was occupied and the takeaway coffee line snaked all the way out the door. It seemed that everyone was taking advantage of the gorgeous weather, not wanting to let go of the summer feeling when soon the days would get shorter, the nights longer and the leaves of deciduous trees browner.

  She would miss Japan’s cherry-blossom season, her favourite time of the year. Perhaps she should ask Seb to send her some photos of the Naritasan Shinshoji Temple in full bloom.

  ‘Hey, you never replied to my text,’ Tam threw at her as she whizzed past, arms loaded with plates that she expertly dispensed with a second later. She looked a little run off her feet. In fact, the whole café seemed to be under the pump.

  ‘Um, you guys are pretty busy, maybe I should go.’

  ‘Nonsense.’ Tam waved at her as she grabbed an iPad and furiously tapped away, no doubt placing an order. ‘This is just our regular Sunday-brunch session. It’ll probably die down in the next thirty minutes or so. If you’re happy to sit at the communal table for the time being, I’ll get your usual sent over to you.’

  Because her need for coffee was so overwhelming, Brie agreed, and to her surprise, Tam’s prediction was spot on. The café began to thin out not long after her food arrived.

  ‘Okay.’ Tam planted her butt on the chair opposite. ‘Are you going to tell me about yesterday?’ she asked eagerly.

  ‘The bride looked gorgeous and the location was stunning—’

  ‘Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what about Josh?’

  Brie pushed her food around her plate and shrugged. ‘There’s nothing much to tell.’

  ‘Huh.’ Tam’s enthusiasm waned considerably. ‘I was kind of hoping when you didn’t reply that you were either too b
usy or getting ready to do the walk of shame.’

  ‘Um, no and no,’ Brie said as she took a sip of her coffee.

  ‘So what did happen?’ Tam asked with quiet concern.

  ‘Where do I start?’ She sighed hopelessly.

  ‘Honey, start wherever you like. I’m going to order us another coffee and, oh! You’ve got to try our ruby chocolate—it’s made from ruby cocoa beans. It’s so luscious and smooth.’

  ‘Chocolate? For breakfast?’

  ‘It’s almost midday, but since you’re nursing a rock-star hangover I didn’t think you’d want a mimosa.’

  ‘You don’t serve mimosas,’ she said.

  ‘We do indeed, only on the weekend though. But we’re getting off topic. You, Josh—go.’

  Over coffee and ruby chocolate, Brie relayed the day. ‘I think you were wrong about your theory. There was a third reason—he was taking me to make his ex-girlfriend jealous. And it seems it did the trick.’

  ‘I can’t believe it.’ Tam shook her head in disbelief. ‘He asked you to go, then went home with her. What pathetic excuse did he give you as he was leaving?’

  ‘He didn’t, I left before he did.’

  Tam paused and considered her a moment. ‘But he did leave with his ex, didn’t he?’

  Brie shrugged again. ‘I’m assuming so.’

  ‘But you didn’t actually see them leave, did you?’ Tam grilled and Brie squirmed in her seat before shaking her head.

  ‘Oh, Brie, you shouldn’t have left.’

  ‘Ha,’ Brie gave a bitter laugh, ‘that’s what Josh said.’

  ‘You’ve spoken to him this morning?’

  ‘No. He texted me late last night, asking where I’d gone.’

  ‘And you told him what?’

  ‘That I had a headache.’ She grimaced.

  Tam tutted. ‘You know what you need to do now, don’t you?’

  ‘Never make contact with Josh ever again?’ Brie asked hopefully.

  ‘No—you have to tell him the truth. You need to tell him that you didn’t appreciate being asked to go along to make the ex jealous.’

  When Brie remained silent Tam added, ‘But I don’t think he used you for that.’

  ‘Tam,’ Brie gave an exasperated sigh, ‘I was there—I know what I saw.’

  ‘Okay,’ Tam said. ‘If you say so.’

  ‘I say so,’ she said glumly. For someone who was adamant she and Josh were just friends, she sure was feeling down in the dumps.

  ‘Hey, I know what will cheer you up.’ Tam perked up. ‘My gran’s back from her seniors’ cruise, and as I predicted, there’s news.’

  ‘Don’t tell me—it’s crabs this time.’ Brie shuddered at the thought.

  ‘Nope, it’s a parasite of a different type. Gran got married.’

  ‘No!’ Brie couldn’t help laughing.

  ‘Yep. Told you it’d cheer you up.’ Tam grinned. ‘She’s bringing her new husband to dinner tonight.’

  ‘What does your mum think about all this?’

  ‘Mum’s livid. She’s questioning the validity of it all—looking to see if she can get it annulled.’

  ‘And what do you think?’

  Tam gave a one-shouldered shrug. ‘I think Mum should let Gran just be. She lost Pa when she was quite young—I think she was in her late thirties. Anyway, she spent the next couple of decades raising her three kids and pretty much did it tough. It’s only been in her later years that she’s allowed herself to have a little fun. I think Mum needs to remember that she’s not going to be around forever, so maybe she needs to back off.’

  ‘Rosie raised my mum, then me, all on her own. I know how hard she worked and it was just me.’

  Tam cocked her head. ‘Rosie told me you lost your mum when you were quite young, but what about your dad? Is he still alive?’

  ‘I don’t know who my father is. I never got a chance to ask my mother, and as far as I know, Rosie didn’t know either.’

  Tam looked at her strangely and opened her mouth as if to ask a question, but was interrupted by a staff member approaching.

  ‘I’d better get going.’ Brie took the chance to leave.

  ‘Will you come to dinner and witness the fireworks? I think Mum is trying to get the rest of the siblings to come too and stage an intervention or something. There will be wine and popcorn. It’ll be riveting viewing.’

  ‘I promised to go see my friends Harry and Sylvie,’ Brie said. ‘They’re having a baby and I’ll probably leave before it’s born.’

  On the way home, she noticed she’d missed a call from Seb. He hadn’t left a message, and just as she decided she would call him once she was back at the house, he called again.

  ‘Seb, hi, sorry I missed your call.’

  ‘Where are you, Brie? The courier is trying to deliver your equipment and he won’t leave it without a signature. They called me when they couldn’t get a hold of you.’

  ‘I was out. Wait—why are they delivering on a Sunday?’ Brie calculated the time difference. Even though it was almost midday in Sydney, it was still only midmorning in Narita. Seb would’ve gone to bed way into the early hours, and chances were that he had been woken up.

  ‘Because I told them it was urgent and that you needed it ASAP. I told you all this already.’

  ‘Sorry,’ she immediately apologised. ‘I’m almost there. Thanks for all this.’

  ‘You’re welcome,’ he mumbled sleepily before abruptly hanging up.

  As she pulled to a stop in front of the house, she could see the courier was impatiently waiting and grabbed her phone out of the holder. She accidentally tapped her messages from Seb and it dawned on her that she hadn’t responded to his last message.

  Courier scheduled to arrive Sunday AM. Figured you’d need your stuff ASAP. Make sure you’re home otherwise they’ll call me and I’ll be grumpy if I’m woken up.

  Shit—now she felt like a total fool. Brie texted back and apologised profusely.

  As she hauled her equipment inside, she decided to email her boss to let him know she was still in Australia, that she needed to hang around for a while, but if they were okay with her working out of Sydney she could take on some work.

  Two days later, a well-defined but weak area of low pressure developed over the Coral Sea. Within twenty-four hours it had strengthened into a tropical low, and by the time she was classified as a severe tropical cyclone and named Debbie, Brie was booked on a flight to Airlie Beach.

  The last person Brie expected to see at her front door half an hour before she was due to leave for the airport, was Josh.

  ‘Josh,’ Brie breathed out his name in surprise. ‘What are you doing here?’ It had been five days since Max and Avery’s wedding, four since their last communication. Part of her felt relieved that he hadn’t contacted her, but part of her felt empty. His eyes skittered past her to the luggage in the hallway.

  ‘Are you going somewhere?’ There was a hint of accusation in his tone. Josh shoved his hands into the pockets of his shorts, his forearms tensed, highlighting his muscles. His hair was slightly dishevelled, but not in a way that made him look scruffy.

  ‘Airlie Beach,’ she replied and watched his brow cock up in surprise. ‘For work,’ she added. ‘There’s a cyclone forming and I’m heading up to cover it.’

  ‘Why do you do that, Brie, put yourself in danger?’

  She laughed, wondering if he was serious. ‘It’s my job, Josh. I’m not a storm chaser doing this for the fun of it—natural disasters are my thing. It’s not often that we get warning that something big is going to happen.’

  ‘But why the whole natural disaster thing?’

  Was she really having this conversation with him, minutes before she was due to leave?

  ‘I don’t know, Josh, I kind of fell into it. Was there something specifically you came for?’

  ‘Yeah, I came to give you this.’ He pulled out a key from his pocket.

  ‘What’s this?’

  ‘It’s a key
.’

  ‘I know it’s a key, Josh, but where’s it from?’

  ‘Rosie’s apartment.’

  Brie felt her eyes goggle. ‘But how did …?’

  ‘I had it. Rosie gave it to me as a spare. In case it was needed.’

  ‘But you told me you didn’t have a key.’ Now it was her turn to sound accusatory.

  ‘I never intended to give you the key because I assumed once you saw the solicitor that you would gain access to the flat, but then you told me about the will being contested. Anyway, it seemed important to you to see what was up there.’

  Brie closed her hand over the key and felt its jagged edges digging into her palm. ‘Thank you,’ she said with a smile.

  ‘I was going to tell you at the wedding, but you disappeared before I had a chance to.’

  Brie felt her back stiffen. ‘I left because I felt like I was only there to make Lauren jealous. It was kind of a shock to arrive and see your ex-boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend at his sister’s wedding, the one he forgot to tell me about. I left because I didn’t want to intrude on your romantic reunion.’

  ‘Brie, first and foremost, I’m sorry for not telling you about Lauren. I wasn’t lying when I said I forgot she would be there. We broke up over six months ago, but Avery had sent out save-the-date notices way before that and Lauren was automatically invited. No one actually believed she would come, even when she RSVP’d. And as for a romantic reunion, did you not see us fighting?’

  ‘I did, and I also saw Lauren cut in on your dance with your mother.’

  ‘And did you see what happened after that?’

  ‘No, I left.’

  ‘Of course you did.’ Josh swore quietly, dragging his hand through his hair. ‘As soon as my mother stepped away, I turned and grabbed Sheena to dance. My mother was livid, but I think by then Lauren had got the picture. Brie, the only reason my relationship with Lauren lasted almost a year was because she was very good at saying sorry and I was very good at accepting her apologies. But after the tenth or maybe it was the fiftieth time …’ Josh shrugged. ‘There comes a time when enough is enough. Besides, why do I need to justify this to you? We were there as friends,’ he said wryly.