After a moment, Patrick let out a sigh. “The file didn’t say why, though. Why did you start drinking?”
“I’m not sure I want to tell you,” she muttered petulantly.
“Please?”
Fiona kicked herself back and forth on the swing, glaring at a streetlamp across the road. It kept flickering and that was damn annoying. She wasn’t sure she wanted to share this with him… Who are you kidding? Of course, you want to share it with him. You’re just holding yourself back because that’s what you always do.
“My father used to beat me whenever I cried,” she started abruptly. “Nothing I ever did was good enough for him. He wanted me to take over his empire. I wasn’t smart enough. I wasn’t strong enough. I wasn’t ruthless enough. I couldn’t show any emotion.”
Patrick’s hand brushed hers.
“I didn’t start drinking until after my mom died. She was driving drunk if you’ll believe it. I wonder if part of me was looking for suicide. I didn’t want to die, but maybe I thought… I don’t know. I don’t know what I was thinking, other than I just wanted it all to stop. I hated my father. I hated my life. I hated everything.” Fiona shivered at the feelings that she had fought for so long. It made her stomach squeeze and her breath come short. Tears started to prick at her eyes. It had taken her a long time to start allowing herself to cry again.
Patrick’s fingers tightened over hers. “That’s… that’s rough. You proved how strong you were by getting out of it.”
“I wasn’t strong, I didn’t do it by myself,” she whispered. “I was trapped and helpless. If I’d tried to leave, I am certain my father would have killed me. It’s only because of the police taking him down that I was able to escape. The night when I was driving drunk and killed that man? I think he was there to kill me because I testified against my father. I was already in a dark place and that… that was what made me realize that if I didn’t claw my way out, I was going to die.”
“Your father… wanted you dead?” The rage in Patrick’s voice was enough to make Fiona smirk.
Well, even if he was a jerk and did things wrong all the time, at least he could be outraged for her sake. “He did, until I confronted him at the prison and told him that if he tried anything like that against me again, I’d make sure he died. Told him that he wanted me to be like him and that if he wasn’t careful, I was going to be exactly like him. He’s left me alone ever since.”
“And you said you weren’t strong.”
Fiona met his eyes for the first time. She was surprised by what she saw there. He radiated adoration, a look of genuine pride. A smile played about his lips. She blushed and ducked her head, uncertain why he was looking at her like that. Her tiger chuffed approvingly, which only made her blush harder. This wasn’t the time for adoring looks, was it?
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she muttered, self-conscious and embarrassed.
“Fiona. You were born into a drug empire. You were badly abused and then turned to alcohol to cope. That is dark. That is something that would suck the souls out of a lot of people. But you got out. You turned your back on what you were told to be and made yourself into your own person. How is that not strength?”
Fiona shrugged. “I don’t feel strong. I feel like… I was lucky. I was very, very lucky.”
“Luck and strength aren’t mutually exclusive.”
Fiona shrugged again. “I still don’t know about that. What I do know is that on that day, I knew I had to change. I cleaned up my act. I finally broke free of my father. I vowed I wasn’t going to end up like either of my parents, and so I did everything I could to make myself a better person. And then I decided that the best way to do that was to make the world a better place. I knew I had skills that were… unconventional. So, I found a way to put them to use, so that I could help others.”
Patrick tugged her swing closer to his and put his arm around her. The heat of his internal fire was a welcome buffer against the cold night, and she snuggled into his side.
“The Blaze Ops is what I wanted more than anything,” she whispered to him, as though afraid someone would hear. “I know the other teams are necessary, but I wanted the Blaze Ops. I wanted a team that was completely dedicated to saving lives. There is so much death in the world already, I wanted a team that could stand against that. I wanted to leave my mark on something that would help people.”
Patrick grunted.
“Not that we don’t have more work to do,” Fiona continued. “After all, on both missions so far you’ve resorted to guns. I’d like to be able to get you guys to a point where you don’t need weapons at all.”
“I know what you mean.”
Fiona glanced up at him.
“For the longest time, I felt like my job was nothing more than killing people or sending good men to die rather than helping people or saving lives. And maybe it was. But when the offer came to join the Blaze Ops… I knew I had to take it. Even though it meant my whole career was going to go out the window, and I’d have to figure out where I was going from there.”
“Your career hasn’t gone out the window.” Fiona rolled her eyes.
“Alright, no, it hasn’t. The path I thought I was going to take did go out the window, though.”
Fiona laughed, feeling somehow lighter. She hadn’t thought that she was going to tell Patrick everything she had tonight. After what happened at the club, she hadn’t thought she would ever talk to him again. But now, with his arm around her to fight off the cold… it felt right somehow.
“The Blaze Ops has given me a chance to turn my life around.” Patrick let out a sigh that manifested as a puff of smoke. “And I nearly blew it by being such an idiot about you. I’m sorry about that. And I’m sorry for freaking out at the club, too. None of that should have happened.”
Fiona nodded, accepting that. “Well, just don’t do it again, okay?”
Patrick nodded firmly, then grimaced. “There is something else, though.”
“What?”
“We’re going to have to face the music now that you’ve announced to everyone that we slept together. And I have a feeling that things are going to get a little awkward from now on because of it.”
Fiona’s eyes widened as she remembered. She’d been so angry that it completely slipped her mind that everybody didn’t already know… With a groan, she buried her face into her hands. Great! Just great. Now everybody was going to be talking about this. Well… she could only hope that meant Patrick’s spiel about her past drinking would go unnoticed…
Chapter Thirteen
Patrick ducked under a swing aimed at his face, surprised and only a little chagrinned to realize that he was moving a lot faster now that he’d started yoga. He grinned as he grabbed the wrist. Moving quickly, he threw Stephen over his shoulder. The smaller dragon hit the matted floor with a groan, then grinned. He accepted the hand Patrick offered him, and Patrick pulled him to his feet.
“Well done,” Patrick praised, unable to stop himself from grinning.
The past few months had been much, much better. Training happened more easily, things came to him readily, and when he didn’t understand why Fiona directed them to a certain practice or technique, all he had to do was ask her about it. She explained it clearly and efficiently. Sometimes he didn’t understand her explanations, either, but soon decided that it didn’t matter. Her techniques worked, and he found himself a much better fighter for it.
Things at the Academy had calmed down as well. Even though there had been a kerfuffle over his and Fiona’s relationship, not much had come from it.
Fiona was over with Evan, who had fully healed, her hair done up and a fierce look on her face. Patrick was distracted by watching her. He loved the way she moved her body. Every inch of her was pure perfection. He wanted to wrap those legs around his hips so badly that he almost called an end to training.
They still had half an hour left to go, though. He could last half an hour.
Stephen bum
ped his shoulder with a grin. “You know, everybody’s still talking about the two of you.”
“They are not. Get your mind back to training, Lieutenant.”
Stephen hummed under his breath and picked up his water bottle. “I’m just saying. The way you two act around each other in public, makes you wonder. Is it real? Or was it all just a scam to get us confused and disoriented?”
Patrick glared at him. “I’m warning you, Lieutenant—”
“Sorry, Colonel,” Stephen replied flippantly. “I just want to see Mom and Dad happy together, you know?”
Eugene was suddenly at Stephen’s shoulder. “Liam’s taking over sparring with Evan. Stephen, you said you wanted to work on your… uh… high kicks?”
Stephen stared at Eugene like he’d grown another head.
Patrick rolled his eyes. That was one thing he hadn’t been expecting when his team found out about him and Fiona. That they would be pushing the two of them together. He had thought they’d find it weird and awkward and not want to talk about it. Instead, they were acting like horny teens that found their first ‘ship’ (a term Evan had informed him about, along with things such as OTP and shipping wars).
All the same, as the men started fighting each other (although Adam found himself without a sparring partner, Liam quickly involved him in their group), Patrick couldn’t stop himself from grinning. He and Fiona were careful about not letting their relationship spill out into their duties. And, since they were both on duty in one way or another so often, it had been difficult to find time together where they weren’t talking about training.
One half-hour wouldn’t hurt.
His ears turned red with embarrassment at the grin that crossed his face as he jogged over to where Fiona stood. She nodded at him, her cheeks flushing too. They stood for a minute, watching the Blaze Ops spar with one another.
Finally, Patrick cleared his throat. “So. It’s been a while since we last talked.”
“We talked before training.”
“Yeah, but that was about training. I mean talking about things outside of training.” Patrick couldn’t help but chuckle at himself for how awkward he felt. When it was just the two of them, they couldn’t stop talking about everything and anything. Well, except when talking turned to more pleasant activities. It was amazing, the two of them together. Yet somehow when they were in public, they were so tongue-tied with each other. “I heard that Senator Kinsman’s bill has passed.”
Fiona shook her head. “No, not quite. I’m not sure what all the legal stuff is, but it’s almost passed. There’s something like one more review it has to go through, and then it’ll be passed. It’s pretty much guaranteed, though. Which is a huge victory for shifter-human relationships.”
“So… is it enough of a victory to do some celebrating tonight?” He rose a brow at her, then grinned wickedly when her blush deepened.
“I thought we weren’t going to discuss that sort of thing when we had an audience.”
“We don’t have an audience. They’re sparring.”
“It’s still the middle of the training yard, and we’re technically on duty.” Fiona clasped her hands behind her back in a move that pushed her breasts out further.
Patrick had to bite back a moan. She had confessed to him once that she knew exactly what she was doing when she did that. He wanted to take her creamy skin in his hands right then but managed to hold himself back. He turned his gaze forward, chewing on his inner lip to stop himself from making naughty suggestions.
“But if you’re in the mood for celebrating,” Fiona murmured under her breath, “maybe instead of celebrating a bill that hasn’t passed yet, we could celebrate the Blaze Ops graduating from the training phase? You guys are a full-fledged team now, after all.”
“We’ve already celebrated for that one.”
“You can celebrate more than once for something like that.” Fiona pushed her breasts out a little further. “Besides, don’t you think we need to celebrate for all the other little victories with that as well? I mean, not only are you guys a team now, but Maura is very happy with your work, and Cooper’s protests were noted and dismissed.”
That caused Patrick to scowl. The lion had tried his best to stop the Blaze Ops from being formed. He claimed that because Fiona and Patrick had intimate relations, it meant her assessment of the team was biased. It had made him angrier than Fiona, though, who had calmly agreed to a test between the Blaze Ops and the Shadow Ops. The Blaze Ops had smoked them (literally) at every challenge.
Cooper had pitched a fit over that, too, but Maura had had enough of his whining at that point. The proof was there before them. The Blaze Ops was ready for real, sanctioned missions.
“The lion’s still mad at us,” Patrick observed. “The other day when we were leaving the briefing room, he tried to slam the door in my face. I didn’t think anybody could be as petty as he is.”
Fiona sighed as she shook her head. “I know. He is petty. Extremely petty. I’m very disappointed in him.”
Patrick shrugged. “Well, he can suck a lemon.”
Fiona stifled a giggle. “Hey, now. We need to be the bigger people. I think that he might be allergic to citrus.”
“He’s a shifter. Shifters don’t have allergies like that.”
“It’s rare, but it does happen.”
“Okay. Well, I don’t really care about being the bigger person with him. He can slam as many doors as he wants, I don’t care. I guess I’m being the bigger person by not slamming doors in his face. Isn’t that right?”
Fiona sighed but nodded. “Yeah, I suppose that’s true. I don’t want to talk about him, anyway. He’s just a sad, lonely little man. I think he’s angry that Dr. Erica refused to go out with him again… but I shouldn’t be gossiping either, that’s not—”
Patrick couldn’t help himself. The way her cheeks were flushed, the way she fidgeted, the smell of her. It overwhelmed him. He wrapped his arms around her and caught her words with a kiss. Her arms wrapped around his neck and drew him in closer, her lips teasing his open like this was what she had been waiting for. Her body swayed like a river against his, and he pulled her even tighter—
“Smut!” Stephen shouted in mock-horror. “Smuuuuuuuut!”
Patrick and Fiona sprang apart. The team all laughed and whistled and catcalled them. Except for Adam, whose face had turned a shade of red only seen on tomatoes. Patrick glared at the lot of them to get them to stop, but that only served to make them laugh harder.
“This is your fault, you know,” he complained to Fiona. “You’re the reason they don’t respect me as their Colonel anymore.”
“Oh, they respect you as their Colonel.” Fiona prodded him in the ribs.
“If they did, they wouldn’t be laughing at me like that.”
“They respect you as their Colonel. When you have your Colonel face on, they don’t laugh. They’re laughing because you’re not acting like the Colonel; you’re acting like one of the boys.”
Liam suddenly cut off laughing. He straightened and called out, “Dr. Rizzoli!”
Patrick whirled, his heart jumping to his throat. Sure enough, Maura was there. She crossed the field, an amused smile on her lips while her sharp gaze spoke of business. She looked between the two of them and Patrick found himself blushing terribly. What a thing, to be caught making out during training. He cleared his throat, trying to think of what to say to get this embarrassing situation back under control.
“This is how you train them now, is it?” Maura asked Fiona.
Fiona’s face turned redder than Adam’s. “Well, you see… training time is almost up anyway, and Patrick and I were discussing Senator Kinsman’s new bill and we got excited about the possibilities and—”
Maura held up a hand. “I don’t need excuses, Fiona. But I guess I have to remind you what I told you when we first discussed your relationship with the Colonel. There are no rules here against relationships between personnel, as long as it doesn’t interfe
re with how this Academy runs. That means not letting it distract you.”
Patrick cleared his throat. “We have not let it distract us, Maura. This was just a little celebratory kiss at the end of training. Nothing distracting about that.”
“Says you,” Eugene called from where the men still were. “I think it was pretty damn distracting for us.”
“Oh, shut up!” Patrick glared at him, earning a laugh.
Maura rolled her eyes. “Just try to keep it a little classier, will you? Don’t make out in front of the students.”
She nodded to a small group of young people on one side of the training courtyard, who were talking eagerly with each other. Patrick thought about saying something about how they already knew all about sex but kept his mouth shut. Instead he nodded.
“Yes, Ma’am.”
Maura inclined her head and headed past them, toward Eugene.
Fiona tugged on Patrick’s hand and whispered in his ear. “We can un-class it in my bedroom, then. Perhaps in the shower? I want to do all sorts of dirty things to you.”
Patrick’s fire flared to life once more. He tightened at the thought of her skin slippery and wet. Fiona, seeing the effect he had on her, giggled. Maura turned with a frown, and Fiona straightened her face quickly.
“I thought you weren’t supposed to be distracting me,” Patrick hissed back, working to keep himself under control while Maura took Eugene from the group and the others turned to him, questioning. They still had a good fifteen minutes left to spar. “Back to it,” he told them.
“As your instructor, it’s my job to prepare you for distractions in the field, isn’t it?” Fiona grinned at him.
He opened his mouth to protest her methods but before he could, her fist swung at him. He dodged and she danced around him, a grin on her face as they started to spar. Patrick had to laugh as they ducked and wove, as though creating a painting together. Distractions could wait; right now, he had a point to prove.
Dragon’s Mission (Dragon Blaze Ops Book 1) Page 8
