Oh shit. It is my fault.
“That’s not fair to them.” I can’t believe he’d do that, and I’m shocked that no one has figured that out. He has contracts with dozens of people.
“I never said I was fair.”
“So now, the next new moon, anyone can die.”
“For now. The islanders will come begging to renegotiate before then when they realize that’s the reality. Their new contracts will be more favorable to me. But you’re in a bit of a sticky situation.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, right now, no one knows you’re at fault. And, I’m willing to keep my mouth shut.”
If anyone finds out I’m the reason Juliette died, I’ll probably be dead before sunset. The islanders will hate me, and they will have no repercussions if they kill me. Samuel knows that. That bastard, using her death to blackmail me.
“I’m not sleeping with you.”
He sighs. “I just want your friendship. Is that too much to ask?”
I do a double take, searching for what he really wants, but he seems…sincere.
Yes, it’s too much to ask, but I can’t tell him that. Everyone is now in danger, and if he spills the beans, I’ll be the most hated person on the island. I would die before I can find a way to fix things. And I will. Samuel cannot be allowed to continue on this way.
I’m usually good at avoiding Samuel, so when I see him, I suppose I can be civil. Plus, if I’m close to him, I can figure out how to fix things. There has to be a clue somewhere.
“Fine. I’ll be friends with you, but you can’t tell anyone what I did.”
Chapter Seventeen
I hide out on my boat the rest of the day. I’m afraid Samuel will tell everyone the truth even though he told me he wouldn’t.
I pace a lot and trip over Raptor, who thinks he has to be right under foot. I try to eat, but everything tastes like wooden sticks and cotton balls. Juliette is dead. Life on the island will never be the same. Occasionally, I smell whiskey, and I wonder if Benny is around, but I don’t say anything to him because I’m afraid to sound like an idiot.
Lorena shows up at my door just after three.
“How are you holding up?” she asks. I want to hide out in my boat forever. People do that, right? Never leave home. I can do that. I’ll just get someone to deliver me food and stuff.
I shake my head and wipe my clammy hands on my shorts. A few tears slide out before I can stop them, and I clutch at my stomach. Raptor comes and lays his head against my knee.
Lorena steps forward and wraps me in a hug. “It will be okay. We’ve all lost people on this island of hell.”
I let her hold me for a moment. How I’ve missed this. Mom and Dad are both huggers, and I miss the comfort of my parents.
Her freezing hands touch my arms as she pulls back. “You need to change, love. We’ve got a funeral to attend.”
“Without a body?” I swallow hard. I stare at my bed, unable to face her. How many hours did Juliette and I lay there and gossip? She was the only person on the island who reminded me that there is joy to be found in this life. Everyone else is dead or depressed.
“This is rare. Usually when someone dies, there is one. We decided to make this as normal for Amy as possible. There’s a pine box and everything.”
I can’t miss Juliette’s funeral. I put on a bright white dress. Juliette wouldn’t want me to wear black. I smooth down my hair and stare at my reflection. Will people be able to see my guilt? Smell it maybe?
Lorena and I trudge across the island, and once there, Luke appears next to me and puts his arm around my shoulder.
A few more tears escape down my cheeks. I still can’t quite believe she’s dead even though I’m the one who found her. I’ll miss her laugh and her crazy ideas.
Samuel officiates the funeral, droning on about how much she was loved and blah, blah, blah. I watch him carefully. It’s possible he’ll betray me, and then the islanders will try to do me in.
Amy is sobbing silently in her seat, and Juliette’s siblings all have red eyes and wet faces. Ruth twists a damp Kleenex on her lap, and next to me, Luke shifts in his seat for the hundredth time, glancing over the other sad faces and then back to Samuel.
There is a tension in the air. Juliette shouldn’t have been able to die, and everyone wonders if they are going to be next.
Someone hands me a fake plastic flower, and we all throw them onto her casket. They lower it into the ground, and it lands with a thud like a door closing. A few of the clowns toss dirt on top of it, and Amy wails so hard that I could swear it is a baby screaming instead.
After Samuel sprinkles some sort of weird liquid on her grave, everyone slowly splits up into small groups. I listen to their conversations.
“What did she do to break the contract?”
“I heard she tried to escape.”
“No, that’s not true. I heard Amy made him angry, but I don’t know how.”
“She wasn’t supposed to die. What if I’m next?”
I let out a breath. I don’t want them to know it was me, but they are blaming Amy now.
Luke accompanies me and a few others back toward our boats. Edward, Margaret, and Jane join us. Luke’s face is full of concern. I walk far enough away from him that his stench is bearable. He doesn’t seem to notice. We walk along the docks, and water drips off the trees like they are crying, too.
“How did she die?” I finally ask. My chest tingles. Samuel told me the truth, but I want to know what he thinks. A weird beeping noise cuts through the air, but it stops seconds after it starts.
“That’s easy. The ghosts,” Luke says.
“But every person living here has protections of some kind. Otherwise, you’d all be dead,” I say, confused.
There is silence for a moment, and I look out into the middle of the cypress and see a green light.
“Juliette didn’t have a deal with Samuel. Her mother did. Chances are Amy did something to piss him off, and it voided her contract.” Edward crosses his arms and frowns.
“No way. Amy wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize her kids’ safety.” Luke glares at Edward.
“Not intentionally, she wouldn’t. But that doesn’t mean she didn’t make him angry,” Edward says, and Margaret nods. “Everyone knows that since her husband died, she’s been dying to get back at him.”
I wonder what Amy is thinking. She walks a ways in front of us, surrounded by the rest of her kids. They break off and head to their boat, and the acrobats go another way. It’s like we’re all going to work in one of those big office buildings, everybody in their separate rooms. It’s strange. Like our whole world wasn’t just rocked. Soon, it’s just me and Luke.
He gives me an awkward hug before he leaves me at my boat. I hold my breath. Maybe someday, he’ll learn to take a shower.
I wait until he is out of sight before I rush to Amy’s boat. I don’t want to stay in my own little house where I can still see Juliette sitting on the porch, dead. Besides, guilt settles in my stomach. It’s my fault.
Juliette was the one who helped me the most. The island will be so lonely without her.
I fling Amy’s door open and find her alone in the living room, sobbing. I wrap my arms around her, and she cries into my shoulder.
After a while, I think she’s finally run out of tears. She wipes her eyes and stares at me.
“Why her?” Amy’s voice cracks.
I swallow and shake my head. I grab a cherry sucker out of her candy bowl and hand it to her, hoping it will help stop her heaving, but she just takes it and fidgets with it instead.
“I know what everyone is saying. But I would never…”
“I know,” I say.
“I don’t understand. Samuel promised they’d be safe. What happened to cause her death?”
Amy’s eyes beg me to answer, and I choke down the guilt. “I don’t know.”
On top of everything else, now I’m a phony, lying to a woman who
is like a second mother to me.
I don’t breathe for the next thirty seconds, sure she’ll see the guilt on my face. When I start getting light headed from lack of oxygen, she looks away, and I’m finally able to take a breath and clear my throat to speak again.
“What exactly were your terms with Samuel?” I have to know this because when he asks for them to sign new contracts, she’ll be the first in line. Plus, the more I understand about the contracts, the more I’ll be able to protect myself and the others.
She gets up off the floor and sinks onto the couch. I move a stack of papers and take the chair next to her.
“There is nothing in this world I wanted more than children. I longed to be a mother more than anything. I know that seems silly in today’s world. But truly, that was my only desire. In college, I majored in child development. Then, my senior year, I developed leukemia. I beat it, but the chemo took my fertility. Two years later, my husband and I eloped in New Orleans, and we met Samuel.
“Mind you, I’d been seeking a solution to my infertility. Every specialist I’d seen said it wasn’t possible, so I started seeking alternative routes. I’d been to every natural healer in the south and snooping around the voodoo circles. Samuel came and promised me as many children as I wanted, but I’d have to spend my life on the island. I didn’t hesitate.”
“But how did that protect your children?”
“Part of the deal was that my children couldn’t be harmed and they could leave the island when they turned eighteen.”
Geesh, if I hadn’t come around, Juliette would’ve been able to leave in just a couple of years. I cost her everything.
“All that only in exchange for your life on the island.”
Amy nodded, and a sob caught in her throat. There had to be more to it than that. Samuel had no incentive to sign that contract, and Samuel always had ulterior motives.
“That doesn’t make sense. What was in it for Samuel?”
“He got the life of my husband. That wasn’t clear when we signed the contract. But he died the next new moon.” She says it matter of factly, without any sadness, which may be because it was so long ago.
It occurred to me that I’ve never asked about her husband. I should’ve, considering how many kids she has, but I guess I was too caught up myself to even notice.
“Then, how…” Because if her husband is a ghost, she can’t get pregnant.
She lets out a laugh-sob. “I see him twice a month.”
Well. That’s an interesting development. No sex with ghosts, or I might end up with babies. I snort. That is the last thing I should be thinking about right now.
“What does he do in the circus?”
“He swallows fire.”
I nearly laugh out loud. No wonder I like Tyson. Juliette never mentioned he was her dad. Aside from Benny, he is my favorite ghost.
“I didn’t do anything to void the contract, Callie.” Amy’s eyes bore into mine, willing me to believe her. And I’m probably the only one on the island who does.
“I believe you,” I say. One of the first honest things I’ve said to her since I entered her house.
Jeffery, her youngest son, comes into the room, bawling, and she scoops him into her arms. He’s only six and probably doesn’t understand death. I excuse myself and race back to my boat with guilt following me the whole way.
Chapter Eighteen
I hide out for the next several days, eating copious amounts of chocolate and drinking sugary sodas. Everything about this is awful. There is no way to stop Samuel from killing people. Every new moon, someone will die, and it could very easily be more people that I love. I hate this world that I live in.
My chest feels hollow and empty. I’ve failed in the most spectacular way possible. I’m so tired of this. From now on, I’m just going to pretend I live in a dream world where nothing is real. I’m done trying to end Samuel or escape. It’s impossible.
Someone pounds on the door.
“Go away,” I yell and sniffle.
“No,” Amy yells back. She’s persistent, and I’m pretty sure she won’t go away if I don’t come out.
I drag myself out of bed and crack the door open. She stands there with a grin on her face. I haven’t seen her since the day of the funeral, and it’s odd to see a smile on her face this soon after Juliette died.
“I don’t really want to see anyone today.”
“Too bad.” She pushes her way in the door and shuts it behind her. She wraps me in a warm hug while her perfume tickles my nose. “Get dressed. You’re coming with me.”
“I’ve been through hell and back. I just need to hide out a while longer. Please.”
Amy chuckles. “We’ve all been to hell and back. That’s why we have each other.” She rummages through my closet, finds a t-shirt and shorts, and shoves them into my hands. “Go put these on, brush your teeth, and don’t forget about deodorant. You have five minutes.”
“Or what?”
“Or you’re coming with me dressed like that.”
I snatch the clothes out of her hands and slam the bathroom door. It’s not as effective as I would like it to be. After I brush my teeth, I pull my hair back. I don’t bother with makeup even though my eyes are all red. I do take a tissue and blow my nose. I stare at my expression. My hair ruffles, and I wonder if Benny is standing behind me. I wish I could see him.
I’m still scowling when I open the door again. I wish she’d just leave me alone.
Amy pushes me out onto my porch and down the path. “Where are we going?”
“The circus.”
Laughter floats through the trees as I approach the circus and its rundown tents. We come around the corner, and I can’t help but grin. Luke stands by a barbecue grill, chatting with Elias. He wears a clean blue button down shirt, and I’m shocked to see he shaved. Several others mill about the mismatched tables with candles and chairs. It seems almost like a normal gathering. Like this is all a charming Hallmark card and we’re not stuck in this mess.
“What’s this?” I ask.
“We used to do this all the time the day after the circus. But a few years ago, it fell by the wayside. There were a few of us that were bickering, and others were just busy. But Juliette’s death reminded us that we’re a family.”
All I can hear is the chatter of everyone around us. A dog runs up to Amy, and she pats his head.
“Are we though?” I’m glad she’s optimistic, but last week, I came to realize that I’m stuck here with a monster who is making me be his friend and will always threaten those I love.
“Yeah, we are. We’re all in this hell together, so we might as well make the best of it. This is home.” She reaches over and gives me a hug. “We’re glad you’re here. You make this island a little brighter.”
Tears threaten again but for a very different reason. I return the hug, grateful she’s basically adopted me as one of her own. It makes me miss my own mom a little less.
She lets go, leads me to a table, and hands me a cookie.
If they only knew that I was the one responsible for Juliette’s death, they wouldn’t be nearly as friendly with me.
Chapter Nineteen
The barbecue lasts all evening. We eat and laugh. A few card games are set up, but I don’t play. Cards are what got me stuck here. But, I sit and chat with Amy and Lorena until long after the sun sets. No one seems in any hurry to go home.
Lizette and Collette also sit with us. They tell stories about Juliette, and it’s hard to not cry, but I manage to hold myself together. I reach over for a handful of trail mix from the bowl on the table but then decide for a granola bar instead.
It’s dark by the time I head back to my boat, and the night is still and quiet, a rarity on the island. For the first time in a long time, it’s not all that humid, either. It’s almost crisp. I enjoyed the evening a lot more than I thought I would, and I’m looking forward to the next one. My birds follow, and Raptor chases bugs in front of me, and I laugh when h
e finally catches one.
A lone figure lounges against a tree. “You know, I’ve never been invited to one of their shindigs.”
Devil alert. Just when I think things are looking up.
“Maybe because you’re an asshole.” My birds all start to chirp, and a cool wind blows across my face.
He chuckles. “I love that you never mince words.”
“Yeah, well. Someone has to tell you the truth. That’s what friends do, right?” I continue on like I didn’t see him, but of course, he won’t just leave me alone.
He falls into step with me, and I remember that I have to be his friend or he’ll tell the whole island what I’ve done. Though, I wish I could go snow queen on him and completely ignore him. I glance over. He wears a purple shirt and black slacks. I wrack my brain for an innocent question to ask that might lead him to think I want to know more about him.
“How long have you been on the island?” Maybe the more information I have about him, the better chance I’ll have at beating him even though it seems like a mountainous task.
“I was born in 1863. My father was killed in the Civil War, but not before he impregnated my whore of a mother. I was raised in a brothel here.” He spits out the last word. He’s way older than I thought. Civil War era? I can’t even fathom it.
“That must’ve been rough.” He didn’t know his father, and growing up in a brothel was probably filled with complications. “You must’ve felt like you were stuck in an impossible situation.”
No. I’m not feeling sorry for him. I’m simply acting sympathetic. The water sloshes up against the dock, and I hop to avoid it.
“I did. But there was a voodoo witch who lived next door. She took a liking to me and taught me her arts.”
He bought it. Maybe I’m better at acting than I think I am. Either that or he wants me to be interested, so he’s ignoring any signs that I might not really care.
“Why did you choose the circus?”
“I always loved the circus and Mardi Gras parades. Anything that was party-like appealed to me, so I created an eternal circus.”
Circus of the Dead: Book 2 Page 8
