Disgust, black as the charred stains on her home, boiled in her gut, threatening to spew out along with the remains of her breakfast. Pressing a hand to her stomach, Kat focused on her friends instead. Lexie pocketed her phone after leaving a message for Devin. Rafe and Shawn were going over the details of the case. Leaving them to talk shop, she and Lexie stepped away.
Lex wrapped her in a big old bear hug stopping just short of crushing her ribs. “I missed you so much. Not that I’m complaining, it was an amazing two weeks.” Her smile said everything Kat needed to know to confirm her friend meant it. “It’s good to be home though.” She cast a quick glance toward Shawn before lowering her voice to a conspiratorial level. “Is he the one?”
Looking at the man, she wondered, was he the one? Maybe, given time he could have been. She’d always thought love took time to grow, months surely, sometimes even years. As Lexie had said, it’d been an amazing couple of weeks getting to know Shawn and simply be with him. Never before had she met someone who made her feel so comfortable to be herself or that they were connected on a different level. And it didn’t have anything to do with long, lean, sexy legs, that incredible ass, or abs and arms of steel. Well, maybe a little.
Focusing back on Lexie, ignoring the heat in her cheeks, she told the truth. “He was.”
“Was?”
“We’ve got more important things to discuss right now and I’m in serious need of clothes. A girl can only wear the same pair of panties so many days in a row, even with washing.”
A squeal of tires had both women jumping back as Kat’s little blue car came careening around the corner into the parking lot and screamed to a stop mere inches from them. Out jumped Devin with her dark, curly hair flying in every direction, no makeup on, and two different boots.
“I came as soon as I got your message.” She engulfed them both in a hug at the same time. Pulling back, she faced Kat first. “How’s your head? I was afraid you’d have a hangover this morning, but man, getting your home toasted . . . Don’t worry, I have your purse and, as you can see, your car.” She dangled the keys in front of Kat.
A small sigh escaped. “You’re a lifesaver, Dev. Thanks.”
Devin glanced over at the building, tears swimming along the rims of her eyes. “Do they know what caused the fire yet?”
Both Kat and Lexie looked toward Shawn before shaking their heads.
“I have to tell you, he was pretty worried about you last night,” she whispered. “Maybe there’s hope?”
Kat shifted her stance to put her back toward the men. “Can we talk about this later? I need to talk to Rafe, and Lex, we need to talk about . . . some stuff. And jeez, I really need to call my parents.” Blowing a breath out, she knew she was forgetting something.
“I’m surprised they haven’t got you locked in a tower after last night,” Devin said.
“Don’t discount that idea yet.” Kat forced a laugh. “They’re in Manhattan for the weekend, otherwise they probably would have already done just that.”
“First things first. Kat, you need to slow down and you need clothes. You also need to relax. You’ve had a traumatic experience. You’re not alone now. I’m back and together we’ll find the rat-bastard who torched your place.” Lexie pulled Kat close and wrapped her in one of her big-sisterly hugs.
It’d always been them against the world, fighting each other’s battles, standing side-by-side against the bullies and life’s challenges. When Lexie married Rafe, Kat had expected the dynamics to change. Oh sure, they’d always be best friends, two-peas-in-a-pod, the dynamic duo. But life had changed and would continue to do so.
Overwhelmed, emotions crashed in on her in every direction, threatening to smother her in shock, anger, relief, and gratitude all at once. Temptation to give in, to collapse, to let the tears flow, sounded really good until Shawn’s and Rafe’s voices penetrated her brain, getting louder as the men approached. Instead of giving in, she shoved all those emotions into a small box and tucked them away in the back of her heart.
Rafe stood next to Lexie, shoulders touching, hips bumping, quietly shouting to the world she was his. The dynamics were interesting to watch, Lexie’s subtle shift bringing her closer to her husband, the glow of love radiating off like heatwaves on a summer day. Speaking of heatwaves, if Shawn stood any closer, Kat would go up in flames.
“Shawn’s brought me up to speed on the case. I’m going to head over to my office, give Detective Daines a call and offer my services. Kat, it would be best if you weren’t alone. The news has already reported there were no fatalities, so he might try again. If you don’t want to stay at your parents’ house—”
“Yeah, so not happening in this lifetime.”
“Then you can stay at mine. We haven’t rented it out yet and it’s fully furnished. Swanson will be standing guard at night, so don’t shoot him.” He reached out and squeezed her shoulder. They’d made a lot of progress over the last few months, but they hadn’t reached the hugging stage yet. You’d think if she could forgive him for breaking Lexie’s heart in high school, he could forgive her for trashing his car in return.
A fire department truck pulled in. “Calabrese’s ready to begin the investigation. I’m going to go be a pain in the ass, speed things up. Promise you won’t go out alone?” Shawn stepped around to face Kat, stealing her air space. “I’ll call as soon as we finish up. You can stay with me. You’ll be safe there.”
Stepping back to give herself some room, Kat shook her head. “We can’t be sure he doesn’t know where you live too. Thanks for last night. I’ll be fine with my friends.”
He winced as if the words cut deep. That hadn’t been her intent. She might not have liked how things had gone down between them, but she understood his feelings. Maybe a little too well.
“Now that we got rid of the men, I say we go shopping.” Devin flashed a quick smile, after the guys left, then glanced down. When she looked up her eyes were popped open and her mouth was pursed. A laughed escaped. “I probably should go home and change first. Maybe you could give me time to shower too? Don’t want the sales people to think the crazy ladies have arrived.”
They agreed to meet up at Devin’s in an hour, which gave Kat time to call her parents. They didn’t answer, but she left a voice mail so they’d know she was alive. It was also a good time to break the job news to Lexie. The thought of doing so sent her stomach into somersaults, her heart pounding like a tribal drum readying for war. Not for the first time, she wondered if she’d made the right choice or taken the coward’s way out.
The thought worried its way around Kat’s brain during the short drive to the office. She’d never been wishy-washy before, never doubted her decisions and she’d certainly never kept secrets from Lexie. Paul had changed her whether she wanted to admit it or not. Her confidence took a major blow the day she witnessed him with his mistress. And she’d have to admit, Shawn’s recent behavior knocked her back a few paces.
Men! Why do we need them?
Starting right there, right then, she was reclaiming her confidence. A commitment was made to the school—she’d honor it. She’d also made a commitment to Lexie regarding their business, she’d honor that too, and at the end of her term she’d make a fair and unbiased decision about her career.
They walked into the office to the smell of dark roast brewing and the sound of Vinnie’s laughter booming down the hall. Lexie cocked an eyebrow in her direction and Kat mouthed Marilyn, which brought a smirk to her friend’s face. Entering the main office space, she was a little disappointed not to find Marilyn, the pinup girl look-alike, according to Vinnie, and get to witness Lexie’s first impression of the woman.
“You’re back. Finally. Now things can get back to normal. There’s coffee in the break room. Tell me everything,” Vinnie said.
“Vinnie, did you make coffee?” Lexie asked, surprised.
“What? No. I ain’t going to waste my energy on something so simple. The intern did.”
“W
here is Ashley?” Kat asked.
“Think she’s doing the door-to-door interviews. She left here grumping about the faulty heating again.”
“Vinnie, you’ve got to stop messing with her. And it wouldn’t kill you to hit the start button on the coffee machine once in a while,” Kat disappeared into the break room only to return a few minutes later with coffee for her and Lexie. Vinnie didn’t deserve coffee, even if he could drink it.
“Very funny, kiddo. How you doing this morning? I went by your place earlier and man, it’s a good thing they got you out when they did. There’s nothing left. Your bedroom is now in your kitchen.” Vinnie took up residence in one of the plush leather seats before propping his sneakers up on Lexie’s desk. Lexie scowled at him, but he ignored her and kept sipping his phantom coffee.
“I think you’re at your limit of near-death experiences for a lifetime, Kat.” Lexie dropped into her chair, swinging it around to face the both of them. Eyeballing them from over the rim of her coffee cup, Kat felt like she was back in the principal’s office. “So, I go on a measly two-week honeymoon and according to the town gossips this morning over at Sugar ‘n Spice, people have been running amuck.”
Taking a small sip of the nectar of gods, Kat wrinkled her nose. “You know you can’t believe everything you hear in that place.”
“Well obviously, and I’d put less stock in it had it come from Loose Lips Lilly, but this morning Sally was working and she’s generally a pretty good informant. Who wants to go first?” She swiveled her chair back and forth before finally settling. “Vinnie, who’s Marilyn?”
“Sally tell you about Marilyn?”
“No, Kat did. Now spill.”
“Marilyn Monroe, not the actress, deceased in . . . doesn’t matter. It’s impolite to ask a lady her age. Witness in our current case. ID’d the potential arsonist,” said Vinnie.
“Uh-huh. Is that all? The way I heard it, you two are basically shacking up together.” Lexie swung to Kat. “Have you met her?”
“Nope. She hasn’t shown herself to me, but I’ve met her granddaughter or great or great-great. Babs is a little vague on the details. She’s the living witness that gave us the sketches on the potential arsonist.”
Lexie drummed her fingers on the top of her cherrywood desk. “Back to this Marilyn. Is that all you’re going to tell me? You can’t leave me hanging. You used to haunt our dates to learn all their dirty little secrets. Is it serious?”
The intense stare and intimate question from Lexie had Vinnie squirming in his seat. Kat knew he’d been spending nearly all of his time with Marilyn, that his step had an extra bounce and his grumble had less bite, yet she hadn’t asked. Call her a chicken. Digging into Vinnie’s love live opened her up for him to reciprocate. No thanks.
“She’s special.”
Lexie looked to Kat and they exchanged a mutual eyebrow raise, acknowledging everything he meant in what he didn’t say. Vinnie was a former wiseguy, one who had no filter, not even in front of preteen girls. To say she and Lexie had learned a few things their parents would rather they hadn’t was an understatement. For him to remain mum on Marilyn meant something important, sending off a little pang of envy in Kat’s heart.
A flash of a smile had Vinnie shifting in his seat, settling deeper, relaxing and at the same time sent the tension in Kat’s shoulders into overdrive as she knew her turn was next. Storm-blue eyes with little worry lines streaking out from the corners fixed on her. Two deep lines appeared between Lexie’s brows as she turned her full attention on Kat. They’d been friends long enough for Kat to know she was trying to figure out the right words, to wrap her brain around what she’d heard and how it could possibly be true of her best friend. Kat beat her to the punch.
“I took a job at the elementary school . . . substitute teaching.” She swallowed the lump of panic, squeezed her coffee cup to the point of breaking and watched the confused expression on Lexie’s face. Vinnie kept his eyes averted, playing with his shoelace.
Lexie picked her cup up only to set it back down. “I don’t understand. I thought we were operating in the black. Did something happen to our finances? Are you saving up for something big?”
“No, the firm is fine.” Kat rushed to assure her they weren’t going bankrupt. Two weeks ago, the reasons were crystal clear, yet today, when they should have been a neon sign after having her apartment burned to the ground, she wasn’t so sure anymore. Today they sounded like a coward’s way out. But she was going to see the teaching through. “I’m not saving for anything. Well, I wasn’t before yesterday.” Laughing about it sounded like a better option than crying.
“Then why, Kat?”
“I’m going to go. Give you two time to talk,” mumbled Vinnie.
“No, Vin, stay. You’re part of this agency, so part of this conversation.” Kat gave him a small smile. “After the last two weeks you should be promoted to employee—if we could—because I couldn’t have handled this case without you.”
“Thanks, kiddo. I’ll stick with intern, less responsibility.”
Shaking her head at the typical Vinnie answer, she turned back to Lexie. “For the past several months I haven’t been myself, in here.” She tapped her head and then her heart. “Or here. The psychologist said it would pass, that it was a touch of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder from nearly dying. I didn’t really believe her. As far as I was concerned it was more like SDMS—Shitty Decision-Making Syndrome. I’ve been so afraid of every choice I make that I’m constantly second-guessing myself. I let what happened with Paul eat away my confidence and since I couldn’t face the fact that I was turning into an indecisive wimp, I blamed the job, saying it was too dangerous, the hours were screwy, and that’s why I didn’t meet nice guys, yadda, yadda, yadda.”
Tears hung on Lexie’s lashes, breaking Kat’s heart. Letting herself down was bad enough, letting down those she loved was horrid.
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“What? And rain on your happiness parade? No way. I figured it was just a slump, one that I’d work my way out of, but it got worse and the slump became more like a deep, steep trench. I was going to talk to you both about it, now, when you got back. No point in ruining your honeymoon. And then the job opening came and I thought it was a sign.”
Another sign presented itself now, one she’d seen many times over the years, and she waited. Lexie ran her fingers back and forth along the handle of her coffee cup, silent, eyes down, nibbling her bottom lip. Waiting to see if Lexie’s temper blew or if she’d rein it in, for she knew that was what her friend was deciding as she ran her fingers back and forth along the handle. Kat’s stomach did a couple of flip-flops in anticipation. She couldn’t blame her. Reverse the roles, and Kat would be crushed.
Finally, her fingers stilled and Lexie looked up, meeting Kat’s gaze. “What now?”
Kat caught Vinnie’s squinty stare of disbelief. Right there with you, pal. “You’re not mad?”
“I should be. You didn’t have faith in me to help you through a very difficult time, but I also get why you didn’t confide in me. So no, I’m not mad, maybe a little disappointed, a little sad. Mostly I’m worried about you.”
Pushing out of her chair, she wrapped the best friend anyone could ever ask for in a gigantic hug. Both whispered their apologies and promised to always trust in each other again, then pulled back to wipe the tears away.
Giving herself a few minutes to pull it all together and gather her thoughts, she slipped into the break room to refill her coffee. Despite the promise, both she and Lexie were holding back other thoughts. She knew her friend too well and, as for herself, she was so mixed up where Shawn was concerned, she didn’t know what to say. Coming back into the main office, she ignored the sudden silence between her coworkers.
“I start at the school Monday. Two weeks ago, it sounded like the right option for me, now I’m not so sure. See, here I go again second-guessing myself.” Throwing her hands up in the air, she plopped ont
o the desk and dropped her head into her free hand.
“Do the teaching gig. It’ll keep you away out of harm’s way,” Vinnie said.
What did that mean? Did he doubt her ability too? The look on her face must have given her thoughts away.
“He’s going to know by today, if he doesn’t already, that you survived the fire. He’ll come after you again. At least at the school you’d be safe during the day,” Vinnie explained.
The coffee wanted to come back up along with the full breakfast she’d consumed hours ago. Tears burned at the backs of her eyes and the thought of running away crossed her mind. London sounded really nice about now. But that was the coward’s way out.
“I have to honor my commitment. It’s too late for them to find another substitute to cover the next two months.”
Lexie reached over and squeezed her arm, reassuring her. “This could work in our favor. We can spread the word through the rumor mill that all of the notes, clues, everything on the case—including the sketches of the unsub, which we hadn’t yet shared with the cops—were lost in the fire. And we say our witness has gone missing. We make sure everyone in town knows that Kat has left the agency, that she won’t have anything to do with the case, won’t talk about anything. She’s running scared. Having the new intern will help drive that rumor home, too.”
“Other than totally trashing my reputation, how’s that going to help us?” It was good to have her best friend back. Relief flooded her system at Lexie’s understanding, but it didn’t erase the guilt she had been harboring over her decision, or settle her doubts.
“By spreading the word that you were the only one who had access to the sketch, that we can’t reproduce, hopefully he won’t come after anyone else. Since he’ll think the cops don’t have his image he might be relaxed enough to go out without a disguise and we’ll have a better chance of finding him. And maybe he’ll back off long enough for us to come up with a plan to trap him before someone else gets hurt.” Lexie tapped her points out on her fingers.
Before the Dawn Page 21
