by Sarah Pond
Rachel smiled, trying to cover her embarrassment, 'Sorry. I was just thinking about my holiday.'
'From the expression on your face, it looked like a pretty good holiday!' teased Max.
Rachel blushed, and sipped at her drink. She wanted to change the subject. 'So, Max, tell me about you.'
Max had always lived in London. He liked doing contract work as it gave him the flexibility to pick and choose when he worked and what he worked on. He would work hard, and save up to go travelling. His last trip had been a couple of years ago, visiting Thailand, India and Australia. His parents lived in Spain, and he had a brother and a sister, both living in London.
Rachel found that Max was easy company, and really enjoyed spending the evening with him. He walked her back to her flat, and they stood on the steps outside. Rachel didn't want to invite him in, she was so tired, and just wanted to go to bed. Also, she knew that she would be seeing Max at work over the next few weeks, so there was no need to rush anything. Max said, 'I've had a really good time this evening.'
'So have I.'
Max bent down to kiss Rachel, and she turned her face towards him. His kiss was soft and firm, and he tasted good. Max wrapped his arms around Rachel, then gently pulled back. His brown eyes looked into hers, and he smiled at her. 'G'night. See you tomorrow.'
'Thanks again for this evening.'
Max smiled and turned away, walking down the steps. Rachel watched him go, and saw him turn again to smile at her. She waved, then let herself in through the door to her flat.
Katy had called a couple of times to arrange to meet up, and Rachel had kept putting it off because she was busy. On the third occasion, Rachel remembered how she was going to keep in touch more, and agreed a time after work. As before, Katy was already waiting at the restaurant. They hugged hello, and Rachel sat down opposite her sister. Rachel had gone straight from work, and was wearing a black skirt with a white blouse. Katy thought that Rachel didn't look anywhere near as relaxed as she had done when they had last met. Her suntan had faded, and she looked older, too. They chatted about work and life in general over the course of the evening. Katy said, 'It seems like work is taking over again. How's the new approach going with more time for yourself?'
'Okay. Actually, I've been out for a drink with Max from work a couple of times now.'
'And?'
'He's really sweet. He's attractive, and thoughtful. I really like him.'
'You just like him?'
'I'm just seeing where it goes. No pressure.'
Katy noticed that Rachel wasn't anywhere near as animated as she had been when they had met up after her holiday. 'You seem to be taking things a lot slower than you did with your holiday fling.' Rachel looked up, surprised that Katy would mention it. 'Yes, well. As I said, it's over. It was a holiday thing. It can't be anything more.'
Katy spoke softly, 'You really liked her, didn't you?'
Rachel hesitated, before saying, 'Yes.'
'Who ended it?'
'I did. I couldn't see how it would work, so it was best to finish it before it got started.'
'It sounded to me that you were more than started!'
'Oh, Katy. I really let myself go. It was amazing.' Then the expression on Rachel's face changed, and she said, 'Now, I'm just getting on with my life again.' The shutter had come down, and Katy changed the subject.
Over the next few weeks, Rachel and Max gradually spent more time together. They would go to lunch, meet after work some evenings and go for a drink or see a film together. Sometimes Max would stay with her, sometimes they would stay at his place. Rachel didn't have much spare time though, the exhibitions took a lot of organising. As good an assistant as Lisa was, Rachel couldn't quite let go of organising as much as she could herself. This wasn't a reflection on Lisa's abilities, but due to Rachel wanting to be in control of things. It was something that Mark had commented on, on many occasions. Tom had given up trying to tell her. If she wanted to spend all of her time at the gallery, that was up to her.
Lisa missed her gym partner. She was still going regularly. 'You should come along with me. It's been ages since we went together. There's a couple of new guys who have joined, very cute!'
'Lisa, I don't have time at the moment.'
'You could make time, if you wanted to. I can't help noticing that you're spending quite a bit of time with Max. Anything you want to tell me?'
Rachel looked at Lisa, 'No.'
Lisa laughed. 'Well, I'm pleased for you. Max is very sweet.'
'You know, you could ask Tom to go to the gym with you.'
'He usually goes with Jeremy after work. I don't much fancy being the third wheel!'
'If you've finished questioning me, how about you give me a hand with these folders?'
Max was already finding that Rachel was less and less available. She was working into the evenings most days, now. In fact, he saw more of her at work. Still, he really liked her, so he thought he would see where things go. Work would quieten down soon, then maybe they would have more time together then.
The paintings had arrived for the October exhibition, and were being unwrapped. One of the largest canvases had just been put on the wall as Rachel walked into the gallery. It was a close up of a hibiscus, and reminded Rachel of the picture hanging in the bedroom at the cottage. As she stood looking at the beautiful painting, the memories came flooding back so vividly, they threatened to drown her. She remembered laying in bed, Lea looking at her in that way she had, as though no one in the world mattered, except Rachel. She was about to say something to Tom, when she turned to see Lea standing in the gallery, watching her. Surprised would be rather an understatement. Rachel's heart hammered against her chest as she smiled at Lea.
As Lea walked into the gallery, she was looking for Tom. He sounded really nice on the phone, and she was looking forward to meeting him. Lea could see that the big canvas had already been hung up, and there was a woman looking at it. No, it can't be. Her eyes must be playing tricks on her. As Lea saw Rachel, she was reminded of the day that she had walked into the cottage and had seen her for the first time, and her heart flipped. Just like before, Rachel had been facing away from her, and now turned towards Lea. It took her straight back to that summer, as if no time at all had passed.
Rachel smiled broadly, and walked over to hug Lea, 'What on earth are you doing here?'
Lea said, 'I was going to ask you the same thing! Do you work here?'
They pulled apart, 'Yes, Tom and I own the gallery. I can't believe you're here!'
'Well, just for a few days, while we get the exhibition up and running.' Despite how things had ended with them, Lea was thrilled to see Rachel again.
Rachel was trying to put two and two together, 'You mean, this is your work? How can I have not known about it. Your name never came up.'
Lea laughed, 'My name is actually Eleanor, but I prefer Lea. I only use my full name for my painting.' Rachel realised that she didn't even know Lea's surname.
Rachel thought again of the painting at the cottage, how many times she had lay there looking at it after they had made love. 'The painting in the bedroom at the cottage?'
Lea nodded, and smiled. She gave Rachel a look that showed that she had been thinking the same, and Rachel blushed. 'I still can't believe I didn't know, why didn't you tell me that you were an artist?'
'Well, you had a strict no work talk rule!' They hugged again, and it felt so good to Lea to hold Rachel again. She hugged Rachel tightly, as if the closer she held her, the more it would connect them.
As Tom walked over to them, Rachel said, 'Tom, I can't believe it. I met Lea on holiday. She was looking after the cottage where I was staying. I had no idea she was an artist.'
Tom reached out to shake Lea's hand, 'It's so good to meet you. Thank you for coming all this way.'
Lea beamed at Tom, 'The pleasure is all mine. I'm so thrilled to get to exhibit my work in London.'
As they chatted away together, Lea noticed that
Rachel didn't make any reference to their relationship. She guessed that Rachel hadn't told Tom about them. Obviously, there was no reason that she would have done. Still, she couldn't help but feel a bit hurt. As they talked, Lea watched Rachel. She was still intensely attracted to her, and a part of her wished that she wasn't. It would be less painful. Once Tom had left, Lea asked Rachel, 'Would you like to go out for dinner this evening? It would be great to catch up.'
'Um, yes. That would be really nice.'
Smiling at Rachel, Lea said, 'Well, I'd better catch up with Tom. We've got a few things to go through before tomorrow.'
They made arrangements to meet later, then Lea went off to find Tom. She was really looking forward to having Rachel to herself, although she had thought that Rachel had seemed a bit reticent when Lea had asked her to dinner. Of course, they hadn't seen each other for a few months, and the last phone conversation had been rather difficult.
At the end of the day, Lea knocked on the door of Rachel's office. Rachel looked up, and smiled at Lea, 'Come on in, and take a seat. I'll be finished in a mo.'
Lea sat down, watching Rachel as she busied herself about the office. Rachel was wearing a dark trouser suit with heels, and an open neck lilac blouse. Lea thought how much older she looked than she had in the summer. Well, she was the owner of her own business, not a holiday maker. She would hardly turn up at the gallery in jeans and a t shirt. Still, it was a very well cut suit, and she did look gorgeous in it. 'You look very sophisticated. Although, I hadn't really figured you for the business suit look.' Rachel smiled briefly, and carried on with what she was doing. 'Of course, we spent quite a lot of our time together not wearing much at all.' She looked across at Rachel, but she seemed distracted, and Lea wondered whether she had even heard her comment.
After a few minutes, Rachel said, 'Okay, I'm ready now. Where do you fancy eating?'
'I don't mind. What do you recommend?'
'There's a nice Italian restaurant on The Strand.'
Lea smiled at Rachel. 'The first time you bought me dinner was Italian. After our trip to the cove.'
How could Rachel forget. That day had rocked her world in more ways than one. Rachel looked at Lea, and softly said, 'Yes, I remember.'
As Rachel looked at Lea with those smokey grey eyes, Lea wanted to get up, hold Rachel in her arms and kiss her. Then Rachel looked away, and the moment was gone.
At the restaurant, Rachel and Lea were shown to a table in the corner, and sat down. The waiter brought their drinks to the table, and Rachel raised her glass, 'Here's to a successful exhibition.'
Lea added, 'And to friends reuniting.' She smiled at Rachel over the top of her wine glass.
They clinked glasses, and took a sip of their wine. Rachel wanted to know all about Lea's painting. She still couldn't believe how it had never come up on her holiday. Lea explained that in the summer, her life was more involved with working at the cafe and helping Sue with the cottage. She did most of her painting in the autumn and winter, when the holiday season was quieter. Lea was self taught, and had begun painting when she was eight or nine, she couldn't quite remember. She shared a studio near home with other artists to paint in. Rachel watched as Lea excitedly talked about her art, her face lighting up as she spoke. Looking around the restaurant, with photographs of Italy on the walls, Lea said, 'You know, one day I'd love to go to Italy to paint.'
Rachel smiled at Lea. She was really enjoying being with Lea again, it was so easy. She idly wondered why she had let things go, surely they could stay in touch more. It was almost a shock to her to realise that she had been the one to cut things off. Lea was right, she did put things in a box. It made it easier for her to deal with things. Lea really was a beautiful person. How could she have forgotten how blue her eyes were.
Lea still couldn't believe that she was sitting here with Rachel. It was so good to see her again, to be able to look into those smouldering grey eyes. She kept trying to remind herself that they were only friends now. Well, not even that, really. Lea was here for the exhibition. Still, nothing would take away from what they had shared together, and Lea couldn't help the fact that she wanted Rachel so badly.
Lea asked Rachel all about the gallery. She wanted to learn about this big part of Rachel's life that she hadn't talked about on holiday. It was almost like a first date in some ways, and at the same time, so familiar, as if they had seen each other only yesterday. Lea could see Rachel relaxing more and more as the evening wore on. She had removed her jacket, and rolled her sleeves up. Lea saw more of the person that Rachel had been on holiday, the free spirit that she had fallen in love with. As Lea looked across the table, into Rachel's smoky eyes, she could see how dilated they were. She had seen that look many times before, and knew it wasn't the lighting in the restaurant that was causing it. Her heart flipped for the second time that day.
After dinner, Rachel walked Lea back to her hotel. 'Would you like to come in and have a drink?'
Rachel hesitated. 'I had better get home. I've got a lot to do tomorrow.'
Lea couldn't hide her disappointment, 'Come on, I haven't seen you in months. Please.'
Rachel smiled. 'Okay, but just a quick one, I've got to be in early for work tomorrow.'
Lea gave Rachel a look. She was beginning to see why Tom had made Rachel take a holiday, and not talk about work. Rachel didn't seem as carefree here as she had been in the summer. She had started to relax at the restaurant, but now she seemed more guarded. Still, maybe once they were on their own, Rachel would relax more. Lea let them into the room, and closed the door behind her. Lea's pulse was racing now, 'I couldn't wait to get you on your own. I've been desperate to kiss you all evening,' and with that, her mouth was on Rachel's.
For a moment, Rachel forgot herself, and began kissing back, their arms around one another. Lea was in heaven, this felt so good. She had missed Rachel so much, and she had seen the way that Rachel had looked at her in the restaurant. Rachel tasted as good as she remembered, and she never wanted it to end. For Rachel, it was as if time had stood still, and she almost expected to open her eyes and be back in Lea's cottage. Lea started to unbutton Rachel's blouse, but Rachel pulled back, breathing heavily, 'What am I doing. I can't. I'm really sorry.'
Lea looked hurt, 'What do you mean?'
'I should have told you earlier. I have a boyfriend. I'm so sorry.'
Lea felt like she had been punched in the stomach. Rachel hated seeing the look of hurt and shock on her face. Lea could feel tears welling up, 'I'm so stupid. I didn't think. Sorry.'
Rachel touched Lea's arm, 'Don't be sorry. I just can't, that's all. Look, I'm going to head off. I'll see you at the gallery tomorrow. Bye.'
As Rachel left, Lea sunk down on the bed, feeling hollow inside.
When Rachel got back outside on the street, she leaned heavily on the wall, letting the evening air cool her flushed face. Her heart was pumping, her breathing heavy. The kiss had brought all of those feelings from the summer back again, and she had been surprised by the strength of her wanting. Rachel had thought that it was all over at the end of the holiday, but it very clearly wasn't.
As Lea sat on the bed, the events of the evening whirled around her head. Well, what had she been expecting. Rachel had made it clear that it was just a holiday thing. They hadn't seen each other for months, so why on earth would she assume that they would carry on where they had left off. But that kiss...
The next day at the gallery was awkward between Rachel and Lea. Rachel was being much more distant with her, and Lea found it really hard. Clearly, Rachel had moved on now. Lea sighed, realising that she really had to let it go now, despite how she felt. Maybe she had just needed this closure.
Rachel was doing her best to keep her cool. Seeing Lea again had been great, and that kiss in the hotel had brought back all of those memories of them together. But that had been a holiday thing, there was no way it would work. Besides, she thought, I'm with Max. But when she saw Lea arriving at the gallery, Rachel's h
eart started pumping so fast, and she felt a desire that took her by surprise. Shit, what was happening to her. She was going to have to control herself. Rachel took some deep breaths and composed herself. Over the course of the day, Rachel didn't see a lot of Lea, as she was in Tom's office most of the time. When she did see her, she was careful to remain professional, she didn't want to lead Lea on. Tom had noticed that Rachel's behaviour around Lea was quite different to the previous day, but didn't really know what to make of it.
At the end of the day, Lea went to say goodbye to Rachel, but she was on the phone in her office. Lea waved goodbye, mouthing, 'See you tomorrow.'
Rachel nodded back, and smiled tightly. Lea's heart sank, and she made her way out of the gallery, and back to her hotel. Lea thought that Rachel really must be over her. She must have misread the signs at the restaurant, even though she had been so sure. And that kiss. Rachel had kissed her back. But Rachel was different here. If they had met in London, would Lea have even fallen for her? Rachel's carefree spirit that had been unleashed in their time together in the summer, now seemed to have been bundled up as though it was wrapped in a thick blanket, and pushed to the bottom of a drawer.
When Rachel finished her phone call, she put the receiver down and sat back in her chair. She didn't know what to do. Nothing had changed, she was still in London, and with Max. Lea would be going home soon. She tried to convince herself that it was just seeing Lea again that had stirred things up. It would all settle down, and she could go back to the way things were, and get on with her life.
That night, Rachel was dreaming. She was on holiday, and met Lea. They had been instantly attracted to one another, and had a very passionate affair. Then there had been a boat trip. One minute Lea was there on the boat, then the next she had gone. Had she gone overboard, had she even been there at all? She couldn't be found anywhere. Rachel woke up in the early hours in a sweat, her heart pounding hard. She sat bolt upright, and Max turned over sleepily to see what was the matter. 'Are you okay?'
