by Sarah Pond
'I thought you seemed very quiet and thoughtful after the party.'
'Olivia's experience with Jasmine was very similar to mine. But they worked it out, and they're so happy. I tried calling Lea, but kept getting her voicemail. So I decided to just turn up and surprise her. When I got there, she had already left for two months in Italy. She would have been back home by now, and she hasn't tried to get in touch. I don't want to upset her any more than I have already. So that's that.' Lisa knew that look, the shutter had come down, and Rachel wasn't going to say any more about it now. 'Anyway, enough about me. How are things going with you and the party guy?'
Lisa smiled, 'Gary is sooo cute. We've been out a few times now, he's really good fun. And so sweet. I could ask him if he knows someone we could make up a foursome with, if you're up for it?'
Rachel was a bit distracted, 'Um, maybe. I'll think about it.'
A couple of weeks later, after some gentle and not so gentle cajoling from Lisa, Rachel did go on a double date with Lisa and Gary, and Gary's friend Alec. When Rachel met Alec, she got the impression that he had been pushed somewhat unwillingly into the date as well, which actually gave them an icebreaker when Rachel decided to voice her suspicion. From that moment, they had a really good evening, to the pleasant surprise of them both. Although there weren't any romantic sparks between them, they really hit it off as friends.
The next morning at work, Lisa was dying to know what Rachel thought of Alec. 'So, you and Alec seemed to hit it off last night.'
'He's a really lovely guy. I'm glad you made me go out!'
Lisa looked at Rachel expectantly, 'And?'
Rachel looked non plussed, but she knew what Lisa was angling for. She relented, laughing. 'And, he's really sweet. As a friend.'
'But you seemed to really hit it off together.'
'We did, as friends. I'd happily make up a foursome again.'
Lisa hesitated, before asking, 'I hope you don't mind me asking, but would you rather I invite a woman to make up a foursome?' Rachel looked at Lisa, and for a moment Lisa thought she had really put her foot in it. 'Oh god, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to offend you.'
Much to Lisa's surprise, Rachel laughed. 'Look, I just don't want to be with anyone else at the moment. It's Lea who I wanted to be with. Anyway, I'd better get on with some work.'
Lisa knew that was the end of the conversation for now. She smiled at Rachel, then left her office to get on with her own work.
Although Rachel was getting on with her life, she still felt bad about how things had been between herself and Lea. She had ended a fun relationship with Max, which she knew she had done for the right reasons. But Lea wasn't on the scene now, and she was feeling lonely. Rachel had met up with Alec for coffee a couple of times, and he was good company, but she was missing the loss of closeness with someone special. It seemed that everyone around her was in a settled relationship, and despite herself, she felt jealous. She hated that she felt that way, but that was the way it was.
It was the end of another day when Rachel was really feeling down, and it was just her and Max at the gallery. Max appeared at the office door, 'Hey, come on. I'm taking you out for a drink. I'm fed up with you moping about.'
Rachel smiled, 'Okay, when you put it like that, how can I refuse!'
They went to a pub which was quite near to where Rachel lived. It had been quite a long time since Rachel had been out for a drink, and she was pleased to give her thoughts a rest for a while. A few hours later, when Rachel stood up to go to the bathroom, she realised that she had had enough to drink. Rachel rarely drank alcohol at home, and as she didn't socialise that much, she really noticed it when she did have a few drinks. Walking back to the table, she said to Max, 'If you don't mind, I think it's time I went home.'
'Sure thing. I'll just get your coat.'
Max walked Rachel home, and standing outside her door, he leaned down to kiss her. Without thinking, she kissed him back, and before she knew what she was doing, they were in her flat, undressing hurriedly. Max had missed Rachel, and Rachel revelled in the feeling of being wanted, and held. Also, it had been a long time for Rachel, and she was feeling horny as hell.
Rachel was woken up by a repetitive, annoying noise. Realising it was her alarm clock, she turned over, stretching out to find the snooze button. Rubbing her bleary eyes, she turned to see Max smiling at her. 'Hey, you.'
Rachel replied with a groggy, 'Morning,' and a crooked smile.
Max sat up, and started to get out of bed, 'I was just going to make drinks, would you like tea or coffee?'
Rachel sat up, putting her hand on his arm, 'Hang on. Before you disappear, can we talk about this?'
'Well, I'm not exactly an expert on either tea or coffee, but if you have something to share...'
Rachel raised an eyebrow, 'You know what I mean!'
Max looked serious for a moment, 'Look, I know this doesn't mean we're back together. We're both adults, it was just a bit of fun.'
'Thank you.'
'What for?'
'For being there. For being so sweet.'
'Any time, honey bunch!'
Rachel laughed, and laid back down on the pillows.
At work, Lisa said, 'I saw you and Max exchanging a few looks. I think you two hooked up last night!'
Rachel blushed, 'Lisa, what are you like. Are you the sex police?'
'I'm just pleased you're having some fun. Are you guys together again?'
'No, it was a one off. He's really sweet, but I still don't know what I want myself, and it's not fair on him.'
Rachel continued with her balance of going to the gym and working. She and Lisa went out again with Gary and Alec, and she enjoyed having more of a social life. Rachel told herself that as being with Lea wasn't an option, she would have to move on with her life. At least she was making progress now, and she was so pleased to have such supportive friends. She didn't go out with Max again, although he had asked her a couple of times. Rachel really liked him, but she didn't feel anything like she had with Lea, and she thought it was better to stay single than be in a relationship that wasn't quite right. Besides, they often worked together, so she thought that it was best not to complicate things, and just be friends. Maybe Rachel was setting the bar a bit high, but it was still early days. Maybe she needed to be on her own a bit longer, or perhaps she just hadn't met the right person yet. Lea was the right person. Shit, as the thought flashed through her mind, Rachel felt a fresh stab of pain over what she had lost.
Rachel had had a very productive morning at work, and was so engrossed in what she was doing, she hadn't realised that she hadn't stopped for lunch. Max walked over to Rachel, and sat on the corner of her desk. 'Hi, how are you doing?'
Rachel smiled up at him, 'Good, thanks. You?'
Max nodded, smiling. 'You know, I was thinking, how about we give it another go? We had a good time together. Nothing serious, just hang out, and see where it takes us.'
'Max, you are so sweet. But I'm trying to do things differently, and it's not fair to you. I'm still working things out. It was probably a mistake sleeping with you after the pub that night.'
'No, I don't think it was. We had a good night, didn't we?'
Rachel nodded, 'Yes, we did. I just didn't want to give you the wrong impression.'
'Look, I'm a big boy. We were just having some fun. I just wanted to say, if you change your mind, I'm here.'
'Thank you. But I think you're going to get snapped up soon enough. You're a great catch, you know.' Rachel looked at Max fondly, then a movement in the gallery caught her eye.
Lea stood in the gallery, looking across at Rachel. Rachel was talking to someone in her office, and hadn't seen her. It looked like a pretty intimate conversation. Oh, god, she thought. Maybe that's her boyfriend. What am I doing, I must be crazy. Although Lea hadn't seen Rachel in months, it could have been only yesterday. The strength of her feelings still overwhelmed her. She could analyse all she wanted, but in her heart, she knew that
it was Rachel that she wanted. Was she going to regret coming here, though. She had no reason to think that Rachel's feelings would have changed. Surely, she would have tried contacting Lea again if she had wanted to see her. Lea's mind started to fill with doubt. Okay, this was a mistake. What on earth am I doing. Do I really want to be shot down again? She was about to turn and leave, when she saw Rachel look up and across at her.
Lea. No, Rachel thought that she must be imagining things. Could it really be her. Her heart began to beat rapidly, and she felt her face flush, and a tingling heat right to her core. She felt as though she had been rooted to the spot for an eternity, but in reality it was just a few seconds. Her brain was shouting at her legs to move. The message eventually got through, and Rachel stood, and then walked purposely over to Lea. Again, it felt as though time had slowed down, and Rachel could see every moment as if it was a slow motion movie. She could see an uncertain look in Lea's eyes, but also saw the look of longing. Rachel drew nearer, and without saying anything, she took Lea in her arms, seeing her pupils dilate, her lips moist and slightly open, as she put her mouth over Lea's, kissing her passionately. As they kissed, Rachel felt as though their bodies were fused together, and it felt wonderful to hold Lea again.
Lea felt herself melting at Rachel's touch. Was this really happening, or had she slipped into a dream? She had dreamed of Rachel often while she had been in Italy. Part of the reason that she had gone away was to try and forget about her. No, this was definitely real. Eagerly reciprocating, Lea put her arms around Rachel, and they became lost in one another. Lea was ecstatic. This is what she had hoped for last October, and she could hardly believe it was happening. Rachel's body was hot and close upon her, and it felt so right. All the months between last summer and now rolled away, and any doubt that Lea had felt was washed away in the feeling of love and longing enveloping her.
Max was watching from Rachel's office, astounded. Well, Rachel certainly had some things to work out, she wasn't kidding there. Watching Rachel with Lea, he knew that she had never been that passionate with him. Then he remembered Rachel telling him about her ex who had come into town unexpectedly. He had a pretty good idea who that would have been.
Rachel and Lea pulled apart, beaming at one another. Rachel said, 'I can't believe you're here.'
'Nor can I, really. I have to say, this isn't what I was expecting!'
'Sorry, there's so much I want to say to you. My lips obviously had other ideas! How long are you in town for?'
Lea looked shy for a moment, 'I hadn't really planned that far ahead. Depending on how things were going to go, I thought I'd play it by ear. I think we need to talk.'
'Yes, definitely. Can you meet me back here after work today? There's a couple of things I need to finish off. Give me a couple of hours and I'm all yours.' The way she looked at Lea as she said that, made Lea's stomach tingle with excitement. 'I'll take you to dinner, and we can go from there. Is that okay?' Lea nodded. 'Where are you staying tonight?'
'I booked a hotel.'
Rachel looked deep into Lea's gorgeous blue eyes. Oh, how she wanted to dive into their depths. 'Cancel it. Stay with me tonight.'
Lea nodded, breathless.
Tom walked out of his office, and seeing Rachel with Lea, he slowed down. Seeing him, Rachel smiled and beckoned him over. 'Tom, you remember Lea, of course.' Rachel was beaming, it was the first time in months that Tom had seen her looking this happy. Tom hugged Lea, saying how pleased to see her he was. He also felt like a third wheel, so made his excuses and left again. As he walked back to his office, Tom remembered how upset Rachel had been over losing Lea. Well, there certainly was something there, you could cut the sexual tension between them with a knife.
Lea left the gallery, and called the hotel to cancel her room for that night. She had left her backpack at the gallery to save having to carry it around. Making her way to a nearby cafe, Lea went in and ordered a cappuccino. Sipping it while she idly watched people rushing past outside, she wondered whether she should have stayed in the hotel after all. The way that Rachel had greeted her was more than she had dared hope for, and the thought excited Lea so much. Then she remembered how passionate and in the moment Rachel had been last summer, for it all to go to pieces at the end of two weeks. Then there had been that kiss at the hotel. Was she setting herself up for a fall? Maybe coming here wasn't such a good idea. Rachel had cut off from her before, would she do it again. She should have called first, then she wouldn't have been tempted to act with her body rather than her mind. Boy, maybe drinking coffee wasn't a good idea right now, her mind was in overdrive.
Lea decided to go for a walk to clear her head, until it was time to go back and meet Rachel. As she walked, the earlier doubt started to fade. She kept replaying the moment where she walked into the gallery over and over again. The way that Rachel had walked towards her, a look of determination in her eyes. It was a sizzling hot look, and reminded her of that day at the cove, when she had walked up the beach to seeing Rachel watching her. Well, wanting her, more like. The thought of it made her yearn desperately for Rachel. Even though Lea had waited months, these two hours felt like an eternity.
Rachel was so excited, she could hardly wait to finish work. Seeing Lea had been so unexpected, but the moment that she held her, she knew that it felt so right. Later that afternoon, Tom popped into Rachel's office. Rachel smiled at him, and he said, 'You look like the Cheshire Cat.'
'I know, I can't stop smiling. Sorry about earlier, I couldn't stop myself.'
'Hey, don't apologise. I'm just glad to see you so happy. Now I know why you looked so good after your holiday last summer!'
'It was amazing. I don't know what on earth I was thinking when I came back, breaking things off. I hurt Lea, and I feel terrible about it. I just really hope that she can forgive me.'
Touching Rachel's shoulder, Tom said, 'It looked to me like she had! When you two get together later, don't get too near any electricity, or you'll cause a power surge!' Rachel laughed, and hugged Tom.
Rachel was just packing her bag up, as Lea approached the gallery. As Lea walked into Rachel's office, they smiled at one another. 'Hi.' Lea's heart skipped a beat.
Lea walked over to Rachel, and they embraced, kissing tenderly. As they pulled back, Rachel's eyes were hooded and sensual, leaving Lea breathless. At this rate, neither of them were sure if they'd make it through dinner.
Holding hands as they walked along the road, Rachel asked Lea, 'What do you fancy to eat?' The look in Lea's eyes gave Rachel an answer, and she flushed with heat, right to her core. 'Maybe I should rephrase that! I'm very tempted, but I didn't have lunch today, and I get the feeling that I might need some energy tonight!' said Rachel, laughing.
They arrived at the Italian on The Strand where they had eaten a few months before, and decided to go in. Lea remembered how she had hoped things would be last time, but this time she knew that it would be different. The thought gave her a pang of excitement. Once they were seated, Rachel wanted to know all about Lea's trip to Sicily. It sounded wonderful. 'I'd love to see your paintings from your trip.'
'Well, you'll have to come and visit, then.'
Rachel looked into Lea's beautiful eyes, 'I would love that.'
After talking about Sicily for a while, Rachel asked what made Lea come to London. 'Well, once Nicola, at the cafe, and Sue had told me that you'd been looking for me, I couldn't stop thinking about it. About you. I couldn't work out why you would travel all that way, and then nothing. No phone call, no letter, nothing. Curiosity got the better of me, so here I am. I really didn't know what to expect.'
Rachel looked intently at Lea. 'After you came to the gallery last October, you really shook my world. When you kissed me at the hotel and I left, I knew then that things weren't over between us. But I was confused. I didn't want to hurt Max, and I knew you'd be going back home again. So where did that leave us. When I did eventually realise how I felt about you, I ended things with Max. I tried calling you
, with no luck. Then I decided to turn up and surprise you. I've never done anything like that in my life before.'
Lea smiled, 'It was very romantic.'
'But when I got to the cottage, and found out you'd gone away, I didn't know what to do. I stayed the week to get some headspace. Then over time, I thought you might have met someone. Also, I didn't know how you felt about me. I was so shitty to you, the way I cut you off after the holiday. I thought that it would be better if I just stayed out of the way. I didn't want to hurt you any more than I already had done. I'm so sorry for how I treated you.'
Lea reached her hand across the table, to Rachel's. 'Look, while I was away, it gave me time to think. Things moved really quickly when we met, and that was my fault. I fell for you so quickly. The thing was, I knew you were only staying for a couple of weeks, and I didn't want to waste any time. I guess I was being selfish in that way. I wasn't thinking about how big a deal it was for you. I know now it was a lot for you to take in. The thing is that we're here now, and that's all that matters. Also, I'm sorry that I said some pretty harsh things to you. I was just upset.'
Rachel's eyes welled up, 'Actually, you were right about so much. I thought about what you said about starting fresh. I don't know where we go from here, but it's so good to see you, to be able to talk about this.'
'Let's just see where things take us. We haven't got to make any commitments or promises. Let's just enjoy being together now.'
As they left the restaurant, Rachel and Lea again held hands as they walked along The Strand and looked for a cab. Rachel's flat was only about ten minutes away by car, and there wasn't too much traffic around that evening. Rachel paid the fare, and they picked up Lea's backpack. Walking up the couple of steps to the front door, Rachel got out her keys, letting them both inside. Rachel lived in the downstairs of a converted house, and her neighbour above was an investment banker. She seemed to work long hours, and Rachel didn't see very much of her.
