by A. K. Koonce
“Okay.” I nod also. We can do this. “No, I’m… I don’t think I’m dating any of them really. Mason, I’m dating Mason. I think… ” My eyes narrow as I try to remember the facts of my own life. How am I confused about this?
Because none of us have had a serious, set in stone conversation that’s why.
“Really?” The disbelief in her tone stretches that word out to a long accusation. “So you haven’t seen all of their cocks?”
I blink at that and the first thing that come to mind is how often I watch Tylin.
“No. No, actually I haven’t.” My chin tilts up as if I’m the epitome of class.
It’s not a lie. I haven’t exactly seen Rory’s. Talk about mysterious.
“Lies.”
“I’m not lying.” Laughter shakes out as I try to portray that fading look of innocence.
“Tell me whose is bigger and I’ll drop it.”
My eyes widen and my features grow somber. She does not want to know whose is biggest, I’m sure of it.
“Please girl talk with me. I’ve never had a girl friend before. Please let me have this one experience of gossip. Please.” Her pleading is endless and only makes me more awkward about what she’s asking me.
“Scar, no. We should just drop it.”
“Just tell me.” Her voice rises and for some reason mine does too just to out yell her.
“It’s Jameson’s!”
Fuck.
“Eww, why would you tell me that?” A bitter look scrunches her pretty features. “Shit we’re awful at girl talk. You’re right. We should not have even tried.” Her hands lift as if she doesn’t want them to touch the disturbing words I just said about her brother. “Yep, and we’re done with the girl talk for the day. That was a good try.” She stands, still holding her hands up. “What non-brotherly-dick-descriptions are going on over here?” She trails over toward Tylin and I follow after her.
It’s not the best start to our friendship. Not at all. But she’s so laid back I don’t think she’s even dwelling on it anymore.
“Trying to figure out what we do next.” Tylin looks up at Scarlett and her hand rests against the back of his chair.
The closeness of my sexy leader and the beautiful woman before him does not go unnoticed. In fact, Tylin’s gaze slips to the hand that’s too close to his shoulder. He pushes out of his chair with a scraping sound from the poor scratched flooring and I smirk at him as he walks quickly to the refrigerator. I watch him closely as he pulls a beer out, opens it, and then leans back against the kitchen sink instead of cowering back to his seat.
His attention slips to me and I cock a brow at the way he scurried away from Jameson’s sister.
Because of me.
His gaze warms as he smiles a small smile at me.
His attention gives me those stupid little butterflies that I can’t contain inside my stomach.
Until he speaks again.
“I was thinking of creating a League.”
“What?” My head tilts at him. Allison looks up. Rory continues eating his fucking ham on ham sandwich as if nothing of importance was said.
“A sort of Anti-League. The Furious Five should make a name for themselves.” Tylin tilts the bottle to his lips and takes a drink.
“I’m pretty sure that’s a racing movie.”
He closes his eyes slowly as a smile spreads across his lips. Scar looks back at me with that same smirk. A small giggle hums through Allison. But no one agrees.
“It’s definitely not a racing movie,” Tylin says.
“They called us the Lost Five, not Furious Five. We sound ridiculous the way you say it.”
“Whatever, the Furious Five, the Lost Boys, the Soul Survivors, I don’t give a shit what cute names Derek wants to give us.” The laughter that follows his words dwindles down with the serious look in his eyes. “I want him to know we’re going to ruin him. Just like he ruined us. I want to destroy that institute and everything he’s made it stand for. The League gave us extraordinary skills but they used them for the worst things. We can use them for something better.”
Allison looks at Tylin like he just hit celebrity status in her mind.
“That sounds amazing,” she whispers.
“Where do I sign up?” Scarlett’s words make me realize just how real this all is suddenly.
Holy shit. Tylin just created an Anti-League in under five minutes.
Twenty-Three
Starting Over
Mason starts nerding out over the Anti-League details the moment Tylin tells him. I swear, he’s ten seconds away from securing a Lost Five domain name for us on the internet. A smile breaks over my face as I watch the three men lose themselves in the talk of their newest and most important up-and-coming project: Project Fuck Derek’s Life Up.
Okay I made that up. But that’s definitely what they should call it.
“Can I talk to you?” His words are warm against my neck and the sound of them sends tingles all across my skin.
Bright hopeful blue eyes stare down on me as I turn to him.
Jameson is so close I can almost reach out and touch him.
But I don’t.
“Yeah,” I whisper.
Rory looks at Jameson hard and a beat passes while they just stare one another down from across the room for a few uninterrupted seconds. It’s like a warning look from Rory, but I can’t really explain it.
Slowly, Jameson walks toward the door. He opens it and motions for me. The attention of the room feels heavy. My gaze meets Scarlett’s from across the room for only a moment before I step into the dark stairwell. When he closes the door behind him, hardly any light lingers in the small space.
It makes it better really. It’s easier to talk to him, to be around him, if I can’t see the hurt and regret in his gaze.
My arms fold carefully across my chest. I’m happy he wants to talk. But it doesn’t ease the tension in my lungs. So I wont make this easy for him.
He hurt me. It’s that simple.
“I’m sorry for lashing out at you.” The rumbling sound of his apology tumbles off the walls enclosing us and falls right into my heart.
My lips part but no words come out. I can’t say it’s okay. Because it wasn’t.
I wanted to tell him I loved him and he screamed in my face. We were so off balance I didn’t even realize we were falling. Until I hit hard.
His voice is quieter when he speaks again.
“You were my friend and I took all my problems out on you.” His hand lifts and just barely skims against my knuckles before he seems to think better of it and pulls it away. His closeness, his warmth, even his regret is all around me. Everything I feel right now is Jameson. “Please say something, Alexa.”
The sound of my name is a painful breath against his lips. The sound of it squeezes my heart tightly.
“Does it hurt still?”
A beat passes in the darkness.
“Not as much as it did. I’m slowly coming off the medicine. I still can’t see, but my power is more on target now. I’ve been working on it all hours of the day. I want to be useful still. I can’t lose this. I can’t lose what I have here.”
The moment he says it I can tell he means more than just his abilities. He means his place in life. His friends. Me.
He waits with patience for me to speak. I can physically feel his anticipation. He wants my forgiveness so badly.
And I want to give it.
I just don’t know how, yet.
“Show me,” I tell him.
I lean into him, unable to stop myself from coming closer. In the dark, my hand slides down his forearm, trailing over his strong veins until I raise his hand between our chests. For a moment, only the heaviness of his breath against my cheek sounds through the small space.
Bright sapphire light strikes through the darkness. He contains the sparking energy in his palm that I hold between us. It splashes light all over every spec of dirt and cobweb decorating the stairwell. But I
only look up at those intense blue eyes. His power reflects off his gaze in flashing colors even as he keeps his eyes locked on mine. The electricity in his hand tingles through my fingertips.
I take another small step closer. The light fades, protecting me with every inch I press myself closer to him. A faint color of white shines between us as he tilts his head down, his lips teasing against mine. We stay like that, clinging to one another but unsure how we really fit together any more.
Then his words whisper against my lips.
“I’m so fucking sorry, Lex.” His lashes flutter and I feel the hard pounding of his heart against the back of my hand. “I’ll never let anyone hurt you. Especially me. Not again.”
And then the light vanishes as my lips crash against his. His mouth opens for me in an instant and despite the dominant way his hands are pulling me flush against his chest, he lets me take control. My teeth rake against his lower lip and his groan rumbles all through us as I lick there sweetly before kissing him harder. The panes of his chest meld against me, and I shove against his shoulders until his back hits the door hard enough for it to rattle the hinges.
The push and pull between us is almost painful. The tension that’s filled my chest for days because of him dissipates into tension that’s crackling and snapping between us.
The overwhelming feeling of love rears itself up inside me once again. I pull back from him with a gasp the moment I feel it.
I want to tell him, but I’m scared. I’m rarely ever afraid of anything, but I’m terrified of telling Jameson that I love him.
His body stiffens beneath me, and I can tell he immediately knows something’s wrong.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” It’s a breathy answer that cuts off all the things I’m not saying.
His fingers release their hold on the curve of my ass and he lowers his hands until he captures mine. He holds them loosely at my sides.
“You know I’m sorry, right? I know that doesn’t fix anything. But I’ll start over. I’ll start over and prove it, Alexa. I’ll be your best fucking friend and nothing more for the rest of my life if that’s what you want. Please let me start over.” His temple rests against mine, his sincere words whisper over my lips.
The second’s hesitation that I let pass, hurts my heart with each moment that slips by that I don’t immediately reply.
“Okay.” My hushed response is spoken against his mouth, and I tip my head up until our lips brush lightly.
The thought of us starting over is an agonizing thing to think about. I don’t want to go back to being his friend.
Because Jameson and I were always more than friends. Right from the start.
Twenty-Four
The Smallest of Moves
The television plays, Thor and Loki are taunting each other back and forth and I don’t know why I feel like I can relate to their banter.
“He’s really not that good looking.” Rory lifts his hand to the screen as if the God of Thunder has somehow insulted him with his mere attractiveness. The actor’s bone structure is apparently too perfect. His accent is too sexy. Heaven forbid his muscle tone is too sculpted.
Yes, he’s awful.
“Yeah, brooding good looks and solid muscles are totally overrated.” I cock a brow at him from my spot next to him on the couch.
“They are.” Rory nods to himself while I stare at him with a look of ridicule.
Jameson snores lightly from the other end of the couch and my heart warms just from his nearness. Things are… better. It’s better now since we talked an hour ago.
Even if I have no idea what tomorrow brings.
It’s incredibly late. Mason and Tylin hover around the computer, looking for listings in the city for where they can officially start up the Anti-League. Such entrepreneurs. Who would have guessed it? Maybe I can talk them into opening our very open sex club next. A private sex club. Very exclusive. It can be held in my bedroom.
Pricy membership though. But the price for fine things is always a little high.
A sigh slips over my lips.
Scarlett and Allison claimed the bunk beds over an hour ago. We really should be getting to bed ourselves. Tomorrow I’m going to look into Allison’s past. A sinking feeling deep inside myself tells me it’s no use. I know she’s my sister. I can tell. There’s too much of her that’s just like me.
If I had grown up with a loving family instead of… Armond that is.
I blink slowly and try to follow along with the movie. Despite how heavy my eyes feel, I can’t stand the thought of going upstairs and lying in bed all night, letting my mind dwell on every single detail of my life: Allison, my mother, Jameson, the new league, Derek’s constant fucking shadow over my life.
No thanks.
Instead, I choose to ruin Rory’s movie he picked out.
“You’re only mad at him because he looks just like you.”
“I look nothing like him.” His hand lifts from where it rests on the back of the couch, brushing my hair just slightly. I’m tucked in close to him from the bowl of popcorn we shared earlier, my arm brushes against his side and I only wish we had more snacks.
Chocolate would be amazing right now. Aside from tormenting Rory, chocolate is all I can think about.
“If Thor and the Hulk had a love baby it’d be Rory Durdin,” I whisper to only him.
“You’re an asshole.” His big arm intentionally nudges me as he shifts, no longer curling into me as he was before. I give a small triumphant smile at getting under his skin.
“You’re ten seconds away from tossing me around the room in a green rage induced tantrum.”
I bite back my smile but it’s so hard to keep a straight face. His head turns slowly to me and I have to work hard not to look at him while I pretend to watch the movie.
Big hands grip my hips and in an instant, he pins me beneath him on the couch. My head bumps Jameson’s thigh but the asshole doesn’t even stir to come to my rescue.
A gasping laugh slips from me as he holds my arms down at my sides.
“Is this what you mean?” His lips curve up in a sexy smile. Lean hips pin me down as my legs spread beneath him.
He’s bigger than me. It’s no contest. He’s holding me down and there’s not much I can do to get back at him.
Except flip us.
My foot shoves off the cushion beneath me—hard. I’m jostled and a screech of laughter pulls from my lungs as we go tumbling down.
His back hits with a solid thud but before I can push off of him he grabs my wrists and rolls us.
“Why are you such a pain in my ass?” He fights a smile that matches mine. It’s an infectious playfulness that’s growing by the minute. Another muffled laugh slips from my lips and he only holds my hands down tighter above my head.
Then his body covers mine just right, his hips fully against my core. All the air in my lungs rips away as I blink up at him. My chest rises and falls, my breasts pressing against him with every breath I take. Less than an inch of space separates my mouth from the thin scar that slices down his bottom lip.
I notice our closeness a second before he does. I know it the moment he realizes it. He grows hard against me. The feel of his length against my center makes my hips shift just slightly.
It’s the smallest of moves.
But that’s all it takes to snap away the moment between us.
He shoves off from the floor. His steps are a solid rhythm through the loft that continues on until he’s safely behind the only door we have to hide behind.
“Hmm, grinding against his cock is a turn off it seems. He loves it when you call him an asshole but make his dick hard one time and he runs away.” Jameson yawns as he stares at the bathroom door.
“Like you’re one to talk about running away like a scared little boy.” Scarlett’s voice echoes around the dim room from somewhere in the corner and Mason’s quiet laughter follows her words.
Great. Everyone saw me embarrass Rory.
That’s not going to bode well for our friendship tomorrow.
Twenty-Five
Push and Pull
My eyes open to smooth sun kissed skin. I’m safely tucked away into Mason’s chest. I’m so close I’m just breathing in the scent of us as he holds me. My mouth is centimeters away from his hard muscle tone. If he didn’t need the sleep so bad, I’d run my tongue along the line of his collarbone and wake him up in the best possible way.
We haven’t had sex in weeks. Not for lack of fucking trying, folks.
Jameson’s palm is heavy against my abdomen, his chest pressing hard against my back. His breath comes in steady waves across the back of my neck. Their arms drape across one another as they both hold me.
This morning life is perfect. My eyes slip closed and I allow myself another five seconds that I count with precision. I enjoy all the perfection they give me for just a moment longer.
When my eyes open, I channel Rory’s powers. I put real thought into using his powerful energy to lift Mason’s arm, push back Jameson’s hand and slip out of the delicious lair that is their warmth.
My feet pad quietly downstairs. I halt on the last step the moment he looks at me. Rory’s pure green eyes are darting. They flicker away from me in an awkward instant.
“Hey,” I whisper.
He isn’t like most of the men in my life. He’s quieter. More private.
And—even though I’d never say it out loud—he’s fragile.
Whatever happened to his brother changed him. He had friends, he went to parties, he had casual sex. And now it’s hard to really get a glimpse at who he is.
I saw him. There was a moment, an incredibly fleeting moment, that I saw Rory for who he is. And he was amazing.
“Hey.” He turns back to his coffee at the kitchen counter.
The span of his back is all he gives me and I hate it.
“Where is everyone?” I glance to the empty bunk beds.
He hesitates before turning around to face me.
