Her Reluctant Highlander Husband (Clan MacKinlay)

by Hanson, Allison B.

  “Outside? But it’s cold.” Her voice squeaked in surprise.

  “We’ll find a place sheltered from the breeze where you can look up at the stars while I have my way with you. I’ll keep you warm.”

  She wasn’t certain he was serious, but she had to admit it did sound rather intriguing. By the time she was ready to suggest they offer their friends an excuse, they had arrived at Cam and Mari’s home.

  The manor house was still not finished. As grand as it was, it would probably be years before it was completed. But the kitchen was in working order and the table was overflowing when they were welcomed inside.

  The older boys were running about, laughing and squealing while wee Cameron and Lizzy sat and watched. Aiden was in his cradle by the fire, asleep.

  Dorie hadn’t felt like part of a family since she was a small child. The scents and warmth in this home made her want to cry with happiness.

  She belonged here. She belonged with these people.

  She still wondered now and then about her real family—her father, the viscount, who had yet to write her back. Though she’d tried not to get her hopes up, she couldn’t deny the disappointment she felt each day when no return message arrived. Would it have taken so long to write a few lines and send it off?

  Perhaps he never received her missive. Maybe she should write another, just in case. She let out a sigh and took a seat next to Bryce, determined not to let anything ruin the evening.

  After everyone had finished eating, it became clear the evening wasn’t just so everyone could share a meal, but to share some good news as well.

  “Kenna’s increasing,” Lachlan said, looking at his wife with love clear in his eyes.

  Mari laughed and turned to Cameron. “I told ye she was with child. You must put the children to bed tonight since you lost.”

  Cam glared playfully at Lach. “You couldn’t have given me a hint?”

  “And ruin the surprise?”

  “It seems it was already ruined,” Kenna said ruefully. “I guess I still can’t keep anything a secret from you, sister.”

  “Nay. I’ll ferret out the truth of it.” Mari turned to Bryce and Dorie. “I expect we’ll have more news of the like soon enough from you two.”

  Dorie swallowed and felt her face go red, while Bryce cleared his throat and said nothing. When she’d gained the courage to look at him, he was frowning as if the idea of them having children was a horrible thought.

  She tried not to let it bother her but had a difficult time hiding it. It was made even more difficult when Lizzy teetered over to Dorie’s feet and reached for her.

  Dorie picked up the little girl as she often did when they worked in the solar. She kissed her plump cheeks and made her giggle.

  At the same moment, the twins got into a scuffle over Lizzy’s doll and Roddy pushed wee Douglas, knocking him off balance and making him fall. His head hit the hearth with a horrifying thump.

  Dorie, being closest to them, handed Lizzy to Bryce and jumped up to get to Douglas. She wasn’t sure what could be done, she just knew she had to help him.

  When the boy didn’t make a sound, she thought maybe she’d heard something else falling. But Douglas was merely drawing in enough air to let out a fierce and terrifying wail. Dorie picked him up and turned to hand him over to Kenna, who didn’t look overly worried.

  Kenna checked him over and kissed the knot that was already growing on his forehead. “’Tis a good thing you have a hard head like your da,” she said to the boy as she soothed him with kisses and rocked him in her arms.

  Bryce quickly handed Lizzy over to Cam, holding her out at arm’s length as if afraid he would get something on his shirt. All the children were crying now, including wee Cameron and baby Aiden, as if in sympathy with Douglas. Though, Dorie thought maybe Lizzy was more upset over being thrust across the table at her father. Cam was frowning as he cuddled his daughter in his huge arms. But her clout hadn’t needed changing, so that probably wasn’t the reason Bryce didn’t want to hold her.

  Before Dorie had the chance to ask him what was wrong, Bryce left the table and walked out of the house.

  “Maybe it would be better if you don’t have children. You’d be the only one who can hold them,” Cam complained, and tickled Lizzy until she stopped crying and was giggling again.

  A few minutes later, Douglas was back to running around with his brother. Lizzy had calmed down, her long lashes spiked with tears as she cuddled close on her mother’s lap beside her new brother.

  Dorie wanted her own child snuggled on her lap. But it seemed Bryce didn’t want the same thing, despite his obvious enjoyment of the act that produced babes.

  She looked toward the door, and Lachlan shook his head. “If you go to him now, he’ll say hateful things he doesn’t mean. It’s best to let him deal with his pain until he can beat it into submission and be civil.”

  Dorie understood and appreciated the warning. This man had known Bryce for a long time and had probably seen all his moods. But she couldn’t ignore her husband if he was in pain. She ducked out of the door when the group was watching wee Cameron and Lizzy playing with Rascal.

  Bryce wasn’t far away. She found him standing in the clearing looking up at the stars. The same stars he’d mentioned her looking up at when he took her off to a place in search of privacy later.

  “You dinna need to come check on me. It’s not as if I could leave you. Even if I wanted to, I’m bound to you for the rest of my life.” His voice was colder than the icy air.

  Lachlan had warned her, but she still felt the shock of his words in the center of her chest. He was attempting to scare her away so he could be alone in his pain. She’d seen how he embraced the loneliness and let it consume him.

  Instead of running off to ease her own pain, she stepped closer and wrapped her arms around his waist. His body stiffened, and for a moment she thought he might push her away or break free of her and walk off, but a few seconds later he relaxed.

  “You wrap yourself in your pain rather than face living,” she said quietly. “Before you know it, you truly will be alone, having run off anyone who ever attempts to care for you. I know it hurts. Trust me, I’ve lost someone, too. And it is my own fault they’re gone.” Her breath shuddered out. “But I’m here for you. I’ll never be Maggie. I would never try to take her place. But I’m here.”

  He wrapped his arms around her and tugged her roughly against his body, squeezing her so tightly she could barely breathe.

  “I’m sorry, Dorie. I’m sorry for what I said. I dinna mean it.”

  “I know. I understand.”

  He shook his head. “You canna understand. You deal with your grief in a way that doesn’t hurt other people. While I act the arse.”

  She didn’t know what to say to that. When her silence went on, he chuckled against her hair and released her enough to look down at her. “Ye were not quick to tell me I’m wrong about that.”

  A smile came to her lips. “I’m sorry for my delay. I assure you, you’re wrong. I haven’t always been kind in my grief.”

  “Ye clever minx.” He laughed, and the sound touched her heart. He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. “Can you forgive me, Dorie? It was just…holding Lizzy.”

  “It made you think of your Isabel.”

  When he nodded, her head moved with his since they were still touching.

  “It is not fair to Lizzy to be deprived of her kin’s love.”

  “She’s not deprived of it. I would lay down my life to protect her.”

  “But until there’s a need for such a thing—and I hope there never is—she will not know.”

  “Are you nagging me, wife?” His eyes were soft and his mouth was pulled up on one side.

  “Aye. ’Tis my duty, and I’ve been lax in it thus far,” she teased, liking that they’d worked th
rough their problems without him shutting her out. It was a step in the right direction.

  “Perhaps ye can wait to start until after I take you home and make you scream.”

  She felt the heat of her skin in the cool night breeze. “We should say goodbye to our hosts and thank them.”

  He nodded, not looking happy about the task. She took his hand and gave it a squeeze.

  “Thank you,” he said as they went back to the house.

  She didn’t know exactly why he was thanking her, but she leaned up on her toes and kissed his chin.

  She’d thought lying with Bryce in the marriage bed made her his wife, but she realized now it was moments like these.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Bryce was fortunate to have Dorie. Not just because she warmed his bed and gave him such pleasure he thought he might lose his mind, but for her steady patience that supported him when he thought he might crumble under the weight of his sorrow.

  She stood by him when even he would rather walk away from his stupidity. And she encouraged him to be better than he’d been for years.

  For all those reasons, he picked up his pace as he headed toward the castle to find her. When he didn’t see her in the hall or the kitchen, he went to the solar. She was sitting with Kenna and Mari, her hound at her feet. The children sat scattered on the floor. Except wee Aiden, who was in the cradle by his mother.

  It was a pleasant scene. One that had been repeated for generations before and would be again in those to come.

  “Dorie, do you have a moment?” he asked.

  She nodded and slipped out of the room after patting Douglas on the head.

  He took her hand and led her to their chamber. When she stopped still a few feet from the door, he thought perhaps she was still worried about being trapped in a room.

  But it was a different concern that bothered her today. “I told you, we canna keep running off to bed in the middle of the day. People talk.”

  He smiled at her rosy cheeks. It was so easy to bring a pretty blush to her lovely skin.

  “Are ye saying you don’t want me? Even if I do that thing you like with my tongue on your—”

  “Shhh. Someone will hear your naughty talk.” With that she grabbed his arm and dragged him into their room. With the door shut, she stretched up to kiss him, at the same time reaching for his belt.

  This truly wasn’t the reason he’d brought her here, but when she moaned as he covered her breasts with his hands, he decided to let it play out. He’d share the real reason for his visit after they were both satisfied.

  He stripped her down, kissing her in strategic places to make gooseflesh rise on her creamy skin. For someone who was adamant they weren’t to be sneaking off to bed, she was the first to be naked and in their bed.

  He’d certainly never complain. In fact, he might keep coming up with reasons to take her to their room.

  …

  Dorie had yet to catch her breath when Bryce rolled out of their bed. She groaned in disappointment and let her head fall back. She didn’t think she’d be able to stand, let alone dress yet. She needed a few more moments before moving.

  Fortunately he came back, sitting on the edge of the bed, still naked. He leaned down to kiss her again and held out a bundle of cloth.

  “As I said before you seduced me into your bed, I had another reason for bringing you to our room.” His wink told her he was pleased with her misunderstanding, so she didn’t bother to apologize. “This is for you. I’m sorry I’m so late.”

  She frowned at the bundle and looked at him in confusion. He’d gotten her a gift? She couldn’t imagine why. She’d already gotten so much. She didn’t need another thing.

  “Go on. Open it,” he encouraged.

  She unfolded the linen to find the most beautiful brush and comb set she’d ever seen. Her mouth fell open and her throat went tight with emotion. She’d never had anything so beautiful to call her own.

  “There’s even a mirror.” He pointed to a small metal mirror that reflected a wavy vision of them, heads bent to explore her treasure.

  “They’re so beautiful. But you didna need to go to the expense since the dowager already gave me a set.”

  “You deserve your own things. Pretty things. I’m sorry I’ve not been a better husband.”

  Was he jesting? He was the best husband she’d never even thought to have. Tears stung her eyes as she reached up to kiss him. She knew well enough what he wasn’t saying. He was sorry he couldn’t love her.

  He’d told her many times his heart was too broken to love again, and yet he treated her better than anyone ever had. She wouldn’t ask him for more, because what they had was enough. She’d never expected anyone to love her anyway.

  They shared a life together, and a bed. He was happy to make her laugh, and he’d been thoughtful to get her such a wonderful gift. But she’d never have his heart.

  And in truth, it was safer this way for both of them. Love had made her mother so sad in those days before her death. She’d wanted a man she couldn’t have. If Dorie wasn’t careful, she could end up the same way.

  She smiled up at him as he took the brush and sat behind her to stroke it through her hair. She would be content with what he was able to give. Hoping for more would only cause pain and resentment. In the days when she’d been locked away, she’d wished for a prince to come save her and love her forever.

  She should be so happy that half her wish had come true.

  …

  Lach had put off Bryce’s trip to the Campbells until the spring. The logic being that the longer they waited, the less money the McCurdys would have for weapons and supplies. They’d already heard that some of the clan were leaving to join neighboring clans.

  Bryce was happy to stay at Dunardry. Not only to avoid his father, but to spend more time with Dorie. His favorite thing to do in winter was to keep his wife warm in their bed.

  His second favorite thing was to go hunting with his cousins.

  They went out one crisp March morning at dawn as they used to do when they were younger men. Unlike those times, his friends were chatting loudly as they walked through the woods toward the meadow.

  It wasn’t just because they would scare off all the game that Bryce wished they’d shut their gobs.

  “Mari told me how excited Dorie was with the gift you gave her,” Cam said with a smirk.

  Bryce had enjoyed Dorie’s reaction to the brush and comb set so much he’d made a habit of getting her a trinket whenever the tinker visited. The last time it had been a locket. She’d not taken it off since he gave it to her. He rather liked the way the pendant dangled between her naked breasts. The thought brought a smile to his face.

  “It’s not a large manor house like I’m building for my wife, mind you, but it’s a step in the right direction,” Cam said. They all knew the funds for the manor house had come from Mari, and they chuckled at Cam’s joke.

  “Have you finally decided to give the marriage a chance?” Lach asked, hope clear in his voice.

  The smile on Bryce’s face faded as it normally did when Lach or someone else made more of the relationship than they should. He needed to be honest so Lach wouldn’t expect too much from him.

  “I’ve decided to be pleasant to my wife. She didna do anything to deserve my boorish treatment of her, and I’ve made amends. As for the marriage, it’s still not something I wanted, but I’m making the best of it, as you bid me to do.”

  Lach didn’t seem appeased by Bryce’s answer. Bryce knew Lach felt guilty for having married him off for no good reason, since they hadn’t gotten the alliance they’d planned.

  The laird opened his mouth to say something when Cam interrupted. “What the bloody hell?”

  Rascal growled, and Bryce silenced him and bid him to stay so he wouldn’t give away their position as a dozen warriors wear
ing McCurdy plaid rode leisurely across the meadow.

  Cam and Bryce stepped in front of Lach, protecting their laird despite being hidden in the shadows of the trees.

  “Should we run them off?” Cam asked, pulling his sword.

  “Nay. They outnumber us,” Lach reasoned. “And we’re not armed for battle.”

  Bryce looked down at the simple hunting bow in his hand and agreed they were not up for a fight with the McCurdys.

  “They look to be scouting,” Bryce said with a frown.

  “Do you think they intend to take us over?” Cam’s brow creased.

  “We should already have moved on them and taken them down. Now they pose a danger.” Both Bryce and Cameron had wanted to take a more aggressive approach, but Lach wouldn’t put his men in harm’s way. Not unless he could ensure a victory.

  “They’ll not act yet,” Lach said. “I’ve word from Kenna’s brother that clan Fletcher raided them recently. The McCurdys are hurting for supplies. Their already dwindling coin is now in even shorter supply. My guess is they are on the search for men and just passing through.”

  “I need to go to the Campbells to secure allies so we can take over their clan and gain the access we were promised.”

  Lach let out a breath.

  Bryce knew he didn’t want a war. As laird, Lach didn’t want to risk losing any of his clan. Their safety was his responsibility. But it was time. They couldn’t continue to hide in the bushes while these blighters rode across their lands.

  Lach nodded in agreement. “Go to the Campbells and see to an alliance. I’ll write to the Fletchers, and we’ll send for the Stewarts. I think they will aid us since Cam and Mari helped the laird’s daughter last year. I want as many men as we can find on our side so it’s a quick victory with the least amount of bloodshed.”

  “Should we watch this group or eliminate them?” Bryce asked.

  Lach looked out over the field and nodded once. “See it done.”

  Bryce and Cam exchanged a glance, showing their surprise. This was sure to cause the McCurdys to launch a counterattack and start a war.