She blinked up at him. He was too far away, but she wasn’t willing to cross the distance. He had to do it.
Was this the moment to tell the truth, or to try to be strong for him, tell him to go fight his war and that she’d be waiting faithfully for him, waving his battle flag? Their gazes held, tangled in this battle of love and obligation.
Liz loved him, and she couldn’t lie to him, no matter how badly she didn’t want to be his “weakness.”
“Everything,” she murmured. She swallowed and said a little more loudly, “I want your heart, your soul, your body. I want everything.”
Sutton stood completely still for a few horrible seconds. Liz’s breath caught, and she blinked quickly to keep the tears from surfacing. Her throat was raw, but her heart felt even rawer. She’d laid it out there, and he couldn’t reciprocate. Why couldn’t she have waited until after his battle? Because she adored him, and if he never came back, she wanted him to know the depth of her love and devotion to him.
Indecision, fear, hope, and then a deep tenderness crossed his face. He strode across the few feet separating them, determination and a fierce sense of longing in his eyes. He lifted her clean off her feet and crushed her to him.
“What kind of an idiot could ever say no to you?” His voice was husky, deep, and awe-inspiring.
Liz laughed and wrapped her hands around his broad shoulders. Relief shot through her. “I’m hoping not the gormless git holding me.”
Sutton chuckled and slid her to her feet, bowing his head close to hers. “Call me all the names you want. I’m your gormless git, Liz. I always have been, and I always will be.”
Liz sighed happily. She trailed her fingers along his smooth skin, up the strong muscles of his upper back and into his hair. “I love you,” she whispered.
“I love you.” He repeated it fiercely, possessively. Then he captured her mouth with his own with as much fervor and passion as he’d uttered those three perfect words.
Liz arched up onto tiptoes and returned kiss for kiss. Her head was light, and her body was filled with heat as he continued pouring his love and passion through his kiss.
He slowed down the kiss and tenderly moved his hands over her back, up her sides, and then cupped her face with his hands. An intricate dance with their lips continued that brought tingles of delight to her mouth and throughout her body. This was where she was meant to be, in Sutton’s arms, savoring his every touch.
When he finally pulled away, he rested his forehead against hers. “As soon as the plan is finished, we’ll give Gunthry the signed divorce papers, and the whole world will know you’re free to be mine.”
Obviously, Kingsley had told him about them finalizing the divorce. Liz blinked up at him. “That was an unromantic end to the best kiss of my life.”
Sutton chuckled. “I want you free and unencumbered Liz. I want you to choose what you want from life.”
“You. I only want you.”
“You’ve got me, Liz.” His voice broke, and then he was kissing her again. Talking and future plans could wait.
Sutton had broken through every self-imposed boundary he’d set for himself. He didn’t care. Liz loved him. He loved her. For tonight, those simple truths could be enough. The war would start soon, and he would have to shove her warm touch to the back of his mind, but tonight, he was going to let himself simply hold her close and bask in the sweet scent of vanilla.
They sat in an oversized chaise lounge by the pool, overlooking the sparkling ocean lit by the moon. Sutton’s arm was around her back. Liz’s hand rested on his chest and her head on his shoulder. He’d forced himself to stop kissing her so he didn’t do something really stupid like haul her up to his room, but this was good, being close and simply being together.
He picked up her hand and played with her smooth fingers. “These nails are like weapons,” he muttered.
She smiled. “Your body is like a weapon.”
Sutton chuckled, laid her hand back on his bare chest, and pulled her closer. He’d dreamed of holding her like this for a long time.
“I think I was wrong about something last night.”
“You were wrong about a lot of things last night,” she said sassily.
He smiled, but it disappeared quickly. “You aren’t my weakness, Liz. Though you do consume me, you also give me strength. You’re the reason I’m focused. You’re the reason I’ll succeed on this mission.”
Liz nodded against his shoulder. “I didn’t like the thought of making you weak.”
He brushed his lips over her forehead. “I noticed.”
She laughed lightly.
Sutton’s grip tightened on her waist. He needed to ask her a question that he really had to have the answer to, but he hated to interrupt the sweetness of this moment. He was leaving tomorrow. The right time for this conversation was when he came home as a conqueror and deliverer, but Liz had forced his hand. Now was the time for answers so there was no indecision when he acted during the battle.
Pulling back slightly, he turned so he could focus on her beautiful face. “Liz. I need to know something before I leave.” Self-doubt made it hard to go on, but after twenty-five years, he couldn’t wait two more days. “Why did you marry Gunthry?”
She glanced sharply up at him, as if startled by the question. “You really don’t know?”
He shook his head quickly, praying it would be quick and mostly painless to hear this.
“You,” she whispered.
A dagger to the heart would’ve hurt less. As he’d feared, something about the young Sutton Smith had made her pick the duke. He hadn’t been good enough. He’d been scrawny and full of youthful pride, but he’d loved her, and he never would’ve stopped.
Sutton wanted to stop hearing about this. Right now. Instead, he gathered his courage and went on, determined to listen to every raw detail. “Me? What was it about me?” He had to know so he could avoid repeating whatever mistake he’d made.
“No, not because of anything you did, Sutton. I married him to protect you.”
“What do you mean?” He sat up straighter, feeling like his world had been flipped.
Liz pulled her hand from his chest and clasped it with her other. “When you were gone with the Navy, moving so brilliantly up the ranks”—she smiled fleetingly at him—“I was so proud. But my father never wanted me to marry you.”
Sutton acknowledged that with a tight nod. He’d never thought much of her father.
“He wanted me to be titled, but it was more than that. He thought you were too intense, too much of a warrior. When you moved up to commodore faster than anyone had done before, I thought it would prove how solid and hard-working and good you were. But he thought you would always put the Navy before me and you wouldn’t be soft and tender enough for me.”
The dagger twisted deeper. Sutton assumed he’d been proving that he was worthy of Liz, but he’d done the opposite.
“You know how manipulative James is.” She didn’t wait for his answer. Very few people knew the truth about James, but he’d known it from secondary school on up. He’d seen through the charm and the façade. He’d never liked the dribbling twit. “He convinced my father that he loved me and would be the best husband for me.”
Sutton’s jaw clenched. “So you married him for your father?”
Liz narrowed her eyes. “I’m not that spineless.”
Sutton’s eyes widened. “I would never call you spineless, Liz.”
She blew out a breath. “It’s fit sometimes.”
Sutton started to protest. She brushed it away. “I told my father I would wait for you forever. He kept pushing, and James was always there, being charming and patient. What a joke.” She blew out a breath. “Then one night, James came over late. He was visibly upset, his clothes and hair a mess. So unlike himself.” She kept twisting her hands, and she studied the blue pool. “He told me about your mission in Micronesia.” Her voice dropped. “The village that was supposed to be a terrorist cell b
ut wasn’t.”
She didn’t have to continue. Chills washed over Sutton. He tried to never think of the mission that had resulted in his dishonorable discharge. He’d been ordered by Admiral Hale to annihilate a tiny village on an island that housed many key jihadist terrorists. Under Hale’s orders, the mission had been conducted in complete darkness. Only after the village was wiped out and Sutton was searching for any proof of terrorism in the remains did he and his men realize the information was faulty and innocent families had been destroyed. Hale had let Sutton take the fall for it, and all the paperwork leading up to the mission had disappeared. Sutton had only recently found the proof that his second-in-command had been paid by Hale to take that paperwork from Sutton’s personal cabin.
Sutton now knew exactly where Liz was going with this. He’d recently realized Gunthry was behind the entire incident and theorized it was because he wanted Liz, but he hadn’t been certain. The way she’d just explained showed the duke and Hale were planning to annihilate the village and make Sutton take the fall before it actually happened. The duke had so much blood on his hands. Those innocent people on the island. Those victims were killed so Liz would be tricked into marrying Gunthry and he could access her fortune and claim her as his prize.
Sutton’s palms were sweating, and his stomach curdled as the horrible events of that day resurfaced.
“I’m sorry.” Liz released her clenched fingers and touched his arm. “I’m sorry to bring all of this up.”
Sutton shook his head, banishing the painful memories. “I knew Gunthry had his fingers in it, but I hadn’t realized the extent until now.”
She nodded. “He claimed that Admiral Hale was trying to protect you, but you’d gone renegade and claimed it was a terrorist cell and killed all those people with your men. He told me that he was going to pay Hale to keep it all hidden. But only if I would return his love and marry him.”
“And if you didn’t marry him?” Sutton asked tightly, hardly able to sit still. He needed to level someone. Gunthry was first on his list.
“He told me that Hale was going to let you take the fall and you would not only lose all your military honors, you’d also be tried as a war criminal and imprisoned for life.”
Sutton looked at her. Tears streamed down her beautiful face. “And you believed him?”
“I had no reason not to. I didn’t know what he was at that time. He’d been nothing but charming and devoted to me. My father adored him. I loved you so much I believed I was taking the fall for you and protecting you.”
Sutton studied her. Even with all she’d been through, there was still innocence and trust in her eyes. She’d gone through a lifetime of agony for him. Her beautiful eyes hardened. “Then you were dishonorably discharged anyway. We’d only been married a few months, but I was already expecting Ally. I completely lost the plot when I found out what had happened to you. James had still been kind to me. Until that day.” She glanced out over the ocean. “I screamed at him when I confronted him and told him I wanted a divorce. He hadn’t protected you. He’d lied. He never hit me, but he loved to grab my hand until the pain would become so severe I would fall to my knees or squeeze me around the middle until ribs cracked.”
Sutton could hardly breathe. He knew she’d been abused, but to hear about it made him want to leave on the mission immediately. He’d planned to take down James’ empire. Now he would kill the man slowly.
“He told me that I was being daft. You would be serving jail time without his protection. I yelled at him that he was a manipulative liar, and I didn’t believe him. He told me quite simply that if I tried to file for divorce he would beat me until I miscarried the baby.” She sniffled and continued. “After that, Ally was the threat he held over my head because he knew I’d seen through his lies about you. Not that I knew enough to prove anything, but I knew he was lying.”
Silence fell over the pool area for a few seconds. Liz spread her hands. “So I agreed to marry him to protect you, and I stayed married to him to protect my daughter. The two times I tried to escape with Ally when she was very small”—she looked down—“His men found me and slaughtered the men I’d hired to protect us. That’s why it was so hard for me to let you and your men protect me.”
Sutton prayed for strength and patience when he wanted to explode. He’d save the explosion for the day after tomorrow when he met Gunthry again. “Thank you for doing what you did, sacrificing so much to protect me.” She’d sacrificed everything—their love, her freedom, her daughter’s happiness.
She nodded shortly. “I wanted to tell you so badly. I sent you that letter, but it wasn’t how I really felt … what?”
His face must’ve been full of the shock he felt. “What letter?”
She blinked up at him. “I sent you a letter telling you that I’d always love you but I needed to marry James, and I asked you to please not contact me and to live a happy life.” She faltered and finally muttered, “You never got it?”
“No.” Sutton pulled in a long breath and pushed it out, calming himself. How he wished he possessed Zane’s Zen master abilities. He decided to change the subject before he launched into a tirade on Gunthry and the man’s Satanic disposition. He hoped there was a very special spot reserved in hell for him. He hoped the good Lord would be sending the man there shortly. “It’s very honorable that you’ve protected Ally all these years.”
“I love her so much.” She smiled up at him. “I protected the two people that I love more than anyone in the world.”
“Liz.” This woman did make him weak, but in a fabulous way, and she also made him so strong. He cradled her close and kissed her gently and slowly, savoring every touch of her sweet lips. He pulled back and smiled down at her. “A wise woman told me that all we have are the memories.”
She pulled her lip between her teeth, and tears sparkled in her eyes.
Sutton was full of love and desire for her. “I can’t wait until I come back from the mission to ask. I need to know now.” He slid down until he was on one knee in front of the chaise lounge, holding both of her hands. “Will you marry me, Liz? All I want are memories with you.”
“Oh, Sutton, yes.” She tugged him back toward her. He sat on the chaise lounge and scooped her into his arms again. Liz kissed him and laughed and then kissed him again.
Sutton held her close after the kisses slowed down. Tomorrow, he had to leave her, but it was only for a couple of days. She’d be safe here, and soon, they would be together, and the memories would be the ones he should have been building with her for the last twenty-five years.
Chapter Thirteen
Liz woke with a smile on her face. She’d fallen asleep in Sutton’s arms after his brilliant impromptu proposal. Looking around, she realized she was in her suite and wondered when he’d carried her up here. She hadn’t slept well for a few nights. She must’ve crashed hard for him to carry her all the way up here and tuck her in without her knowing it.
Springing out of bed, she was tempted to swim first like she did most days, but no, she wanted to find Sutton and kiss him again and again. A dark cloud passed through her happiness as she ran into the bathroom to brush her teeth, freshen up a little bit, and dress in a sleeveless, blue sundress. Sutton hadn’t told her specifics, but she knew he was leaving soon to execute the plan against James. What if he didn’t return to her? She was the first one to know how powerful and ruthless James was. She hadn’t explained the extent of the abuse to Sutton, but it had been a life of constant fear and intimidation.
The first time she’d tried to escape was when Ally was almost six months old. James’ men had hunted them down even though she’d hired her own protection and was hiding in a remote cabin in Switzerland. They’d killed her bodyguards without blinking and hauled her and Ally back to James. He’d broken her ribs for the first time by squeezing her. The second attempt, her father had helped her set up. Ally had been two. James had found them in Australia and had her men killed one by one in front of her. Al
ly had been shrieking and trying to get out of Liz’s arms and help her “boys.” Liz still couldn’t picture that day without crying.
After her men were all dead, James almost drowned Liz in the bathtub, holding her underwater until she thought her lungs would explode. When he finally released her, he explained how he would do worse to their daughter if she ever dared try to escape again. She’d increased her swimming after that and taught herself how to hold her breath for over a minute and put on a good act of flailing around the next time.
She shuddered at all the awful remembrances. There was nowhere on earth out of James’ reach, and his evil and manipulation was so strong. Sadly, most people thought he was the charming politician he portrayed.
Liz finished primping for Sutton and pushed thoughts of James far away. She hurried out into the hallway and down to Sutton’s room. The last fifteen minutes since she’d awoken were too long to be away from him. She smiled to herself. She was thinking and acting like a teenager, but she didn’t care. Didn’t she and Sutton deserve happiness too?
Sutton’s bedroom doors were closed. She knocked once and waited, lifting her hair with her fingertips and licking her lips. He didn’t come so she knocked again. When she didn’t hear an answer or noise inside, she realized he must be in his office. Almost skipping back down the hallway to the wide staircase, she pranced down the stairs and into his office. It was empty.
“He asked me to give you this.” Agatha’s voice came from behind her.
Liz jumped and whirled. “Good morning, Agatha.” Her heart leapt as Agatha handed over a letter. A love letter? How cute was he? She bit at her lip. Okay, Sutton couldn’t be called cute. He was too accomplished, debonair, and handsome to be called cute, but a letter for her was adorable. “Thank you.”
Agatha nodded, a somber expression on her face. She stepped back but didn’t leave. Liz turned slightly to have a little bit of privacy. She slid open the envelope and pulled out a short note.
The Captivating Warrior (Navy SEAL Romance) Page 10
