Chapter Twelve
Chloe jumps to her feet when I open the door and the second it’s closed she rushes forward and hugs me. I just stand there like an idiot until she pulls away with an embarrassed look on her face. “I’m so glad you’re alright. Jillian stopped by yesterday to tell me what happened. I was so worried I even went to visit you in the infirmary.”
That surprises me. “You risked your friends knowing that we’re friendly with one another?”
“You mean that we’re friends? Yeah, I didn’t really care. I thought about what you said, and I think you might be right. Maybe it is time for them to get to know the real me.”
I smile. “Well, I’m going to take a relaxing bath and change. I think Kaven and I are going for a run through the nearby park.”
“You’re getting back to your training already? Shouldn’t you rest and take it easy for a bit?”
“Nope. I don’t want those buffoons to think that I’m quitting just because they took away my hair.” As I say it, I have a momentary grievance for my lost hair, but it passes quickly, and I grab clean clothes from my drawer. “You weren’t planning to shower yet, were you?”
“No, go ahead.”
The hot water feels so good on my aching, bruised skin that I just don’t want to ever get out. I wash the grime that’s built up until my skin is pink from scrubbing. Every time I hit a bruise I wince, but try to put the slight pain out of my mind.
If I can’t handle bathing, I definitely won’t be able to handle training. Not that the bruises really hurt, but it just reminds me more about what happened, and my mood darkens a little. Yes, it’s just hair, but it was my hair, and they had no right to take it from me.
I’m gonna show them. I’m gonna prove to them that I belong.
After I get dressed, I towel-dry my hair, and realize something. I can’t put my hair up in a ponytail for training anymore, and it’s nowhere near long enough to brush back behind my ears. It won’t fall into my eyes, but it just hangs there across my forehead, annoying me.
Chloe knocks on the door. “Kylie? You ok in there?”
“No. I don’t know what the hell to do with my hair. Normally I pull it back for training, but it’s not long enough for that anymore.”
The door opens, and Chloe sticks her head in. “I figured that might be the holdup. Here, let me help you.”
Over the next few minutes, Chloe completely dries my hair with a blow dryer, and she rubs some lotion stuff into her hands and runs it through my short, short hair. She adds a little bit more heat, and gently arranges it with skilled fingers. She’s so careful and precise that she reminds me of an artist.
When she’s done, the longer part in the front isn’t just plastered to my forehead; it sticks up a little, truly making me look like Billie Jean, my favorite rebel from when I was younger. For just a second, I almost don’t hate my new hair. It’s not what I’m used to, and it’s not beautiful, but it works.
Chloe hugs my shoulders. “I think it looks great. You just need a little time to get used to it.”
I nod, even though I don’t really believe it. The fact that there are people out there in the world that would outnumber and beat a girl half their size and cut her hair just infuriates me. I need to teach them a lesson.
Rather than making me happy, that thought actually scares me. Revenge is never something I’ve approved of, and violence is almost never the answer. The fight with McKenzie was way out of the norm for me. I’m usually a non-confrontational person. Is this place changing me? Or am I just now discovering who I really am?
“Kylie, if you wanna talk, I’ll listen. Just come and find me.”
Chloe leaves me to go to her next lesson, and I sit alone in our room for a few more minutes, stealing a few seconds of peace before facing my attackers. Even though I don’t know which ones were there, I have a feeling they’ll be easy to spot.
I’ll just have to look for the disbelief on their faces when I enter that gym with my head held high. I’ll ignore their stares and their whispers, and just do what I do best. Train. I won’t let them know how much they get to me, or how much I feel like crying.
I’ll be strong, and I’ll prove all of them wrong about me.
When I walk into the gym, everything that I expected to happen happens. There’s a moment of stunned silence as they take in my appearance, and the whispers automatically start up. There are a few Protectors though that don’t just look surprised, they look pissed.
Kaven is waiting for me by the door that leads outside, and he looks me up and down as I approach. “You look better than the last time I saw you.”
“Well, considering I was facedown in a pile of my own blood and hair, that’s not surprising.”
“I meant that someone fixed your hair. When I found you it looked a lot patchier, and it was still kind of long in some places. It looks better now.”
“Oh, well, thanks.”
He smiles. “Alright, are you ready for that run? Carlos told me you plan to jump right back into training. If you’re up for it, the park is just a half mile away from here. We can make it there and back in no time at all.”
“Let’s go.”
Kaven and I jog side by side in a comfortable silence that I’ve come to thoroughly enjoy. Today my muscles are sore and they scream in protest every time I move my legs, but I ignore it, and instead focus on controlling my breathing.
The trees around us begin to thin out, and the park appears. Thankfully there aren’t people out, and Kaven and I can just run together in peace. Some fresh air and alone time is exactly what I need at the moment, and I’m going to take advantage of every second of it.
I breathe in the fresh air of the park, and catch the scent of roses and daffodils. They’re planted all along the sidewalk, and in flowerboxes around the park. There’s a gardener in blue overalls picking the weeds from the dirt, and he stops to wave at us as we run by.
Kaven nods his head, but doesn’t stop. We make our way through the playground equipment, and I notice that we have the park pretty much to ourselves. There are a few little kids messing around, but nobody notices us, which Kaven tells me is a good thing.
On our third trip around the park, a car pulls up into the parking lot and a large boy gets out of the driver’s seat. When I see who it is, I stop so abruptly that Kaven bumps into me. When McKenzie gets out of the passenger’s side, my heart stops, and I can’t move or speak.
Kaven’s looking worriedly at me, and then his gaze wanders over to the two lovebirds that are now kissing on a park bench. “Do you know them?” he asks worriedly. “Kylie, if you do, we need to leave, now.”
McKenzie giggles and pulls away, teasing Guy, and she turns her head when he goes to kiss her again. Her eyes land on me, and her entire body tenses up. Guy pulls away from her, and he looks over at me, too. “What the hell?”
He jumps to his feet and starts to walk towards us, and Kaven’s pulling at my arm. “Come on, Kylie. We have to go, now.”
He starts to walk quickly away, and I follow him, hoping to put as much distance as possible between me and my old schoolmates. I can hear McKenzie sliding off the bench, and I stop when she sucks in a breath. “Ouch.”
The smell hits me like a ton of bricks, and I stop in my tracks. As I spin to face her, I lower myself into an offensive crouch, and my hands curl into deadly weapons. She gasps in horror when I snarl at her, and she slowly starts to back away. I don’t notice though; I’m to busy staring at that bloody scratch on her arm.
She stops when her back is pressed against the hood of Guy’s car, and she’s trembling from head-to-toe. I can see Guy out of the corner of my eye; he’s slowly sliding over to protect McKenzie. He’s keeping one eye on me, and the other on Kaven, who’s looking around for a solution.
I keep my eyes on Guy; he’s the bigger threat and, once I get rid of him, I can more easily take out McKenzie. Right now, he’s the only thing standing between me and my first real hunt, and I’m thinking of th
e best way to move him without drawing attention to myself.
Kaven’s whispering urgently to me, but I just tune him out because he’s interfering with my hunt. And I’m not sure how much longer I can hold out; the thirst is building up in the back of my throat, and I can feel my nerves humming in anticipation of my first kill.
Guy reaches for the knife that I know he keeps in his front pocket, and I lunge. McKenzie screams, and there’s a white-hot pain flaring up my left side as I slam into Guy’s chest. He flies over the hood of his car, knocking McKenzie to the ground. I land on top of him and, without hesitation, sink my fangs into his throat.
He gurgles uselessly, and he starts to choke on his own blood. The bloody knife is lying in the grass beside McKenzie, but she’s too busy shrieking to notice it. I ignore her, and continue chewing through Guys’ throat until I hit that vein, and his life’s blood pours hot and fast into my mouth.
Kaven wraps his arms around me and drags me away from Guy kicking and screaming. “Kylie! Snap out of it!”
I can’t help it. I know it’s wrong, but the blood in the air is clogging my senses, and it’s keeping me from thinking clearly. I don’t care about getting caught, or even killed. I just want one more taste of that heavenly liquid that’s still pouring from the hole in his neck.
Kaven drags me away from the car, and I turn on him, snapping at his face. He quickly pulls away and frowns. “Kylie, stop! I’ve called an ambulance, but we need to go, now.”
I fight him every step of the way, but he’s more experienced than me, not to mention stronger. It doesn’t take him long to get me back to Daray and, by the time we’re safe beyond the iron fence that circles the place, I’ve calmed down enough to think rationally.
“Oh, my god. What have I done?” I ask, sniffling. Kaven’s watching me pace back and forth outside the chapel, and he’s trying to calm me down, but I can’t sit still long enough to hear what he’s saying. “Oh, god! Kaven, I killed someone!”
“Kylie–”
“I was like a rabid animal. I just couldn’t stop myself. It was so horrible, like I was another person or something. I didn’t mean to hurt him, I just lost control.”
“Kylie–”
“I’m a murderer! What do I do now? Do I go to the police and turn myself in? Or do I just sit around and wait for McKenzie to go to the police? Will they come up here for me? Aren’t I supposed to be dead or something?”
“Kylie! Listen to me,” he says, grabbing my shoulders. “I’m gonna go find Jillian, and you’re just gonna sit here and wait. She’ll help calm you down a little.”
I nod, and start pacing back and forth. I’m not sure what he thinks Jillian will be able to do for me, but whatever it is will probably be better than worrying myself sick. Kaven turns and dashes off into Daray, and I stand around, running my fingers through my short hair.
While I’m waiting, I check my side, where Guy’s knife made contact. There’s a long, thin wound running from my left hip to my navel, but it doesn’t look too bad. It’s already stopped bleeding, and it doesn’t hurt. I pull down the edge of my shirt and start walking again.
I stop at the steps of the chapel, and peer inside. The place is empty except for the table with the white cloth. On top of the table sits the three white candles and the rose. I get the strangest urge to close myself in the chapel and pray to Selene for forgiveness.
My feet take the steps of the chapel one at a time, and I walk up to the table that acts as an altar. The chapel’s as beautiful in the daylight as it is in the moonlight, but it doesn’t hold the same magical, mystical feel to it.
I kneel in front of the table and bow my head. I’m not sure what I’m going to say, but I’ll think of something. Something that lets Selene know how sorry I am about my actions. She has to believe that I didn’t mean for it to happen.
I’ve honestly never prayed before, and I’m not sure what to say, but I give it a try anyways.
Oh, Goddess, please forgive me for my actions. Today I may have caused the death of a young man, and I don’t know how to make this right. I’ve turned into a monster, and I’m scared of myself and what I’m capable of. Please, forgive me…
“I’ve found that our Goddess is very forgiving to those that ask it.”
I slowly open my eyes as Jillian approaches the table where I’m still kneeling. “Is he dead?”
Jillian frowns. “No. Thankfully the hospital is only a mere two and a half blocks from the park. The ambulance got there almost before you and Kaven left the park. You were probably too busy fighting him to notice the sirens.”
“So, I’m not a killer?”
“No, Kylie, you’re not,” Jillian says, kneeling beside me. “Did you get an answer?”
I shake my head. “Of course not. Even if God does…” I stop, and Jillian smiles.
“This is not God, remember? This is our Goddess, Selene. They are not the same. God may or may not exist; I’m not sure. But I do know that our Goddess exists, and she’s answered me before.”
“You’ve had your prayers answered by Selene? Like, actually answered?”
She nods. “Yes. Years and years ago, when I first turned, I wondered why the Goddess would choose me over all the others available to her. For a while, I thought she wasn’t there. But when I needed her most, she came to me, and told me what she wanted me to do with my life.”
“She wanted you to build Daray.”
“Yes, she did. Many have asked me over the years why I chose to build this home for fledglings, and I’ve never answered them. I trust you to keep this between us.”
“Of course. I mean, I’m not sure I can keep it from Tara, since she can kind of read my mind, but I’ll do my best.”
Jillian laughs beautifully. “Yes, Tara is hard to keep secrets from. You two have an extraordinary bond, don’t you?”
I feel my face start to heat up, and hope that it isn’t noticeable. Nobody but me knows of my feelings for her, and I want it to stay that way.
“Kylie, I only meant that you two were very close. I didn’t mean to embarrass you by insinuating something else.”
I look down at the floor of the chapel, not wanting to make eye contact with her. “I know.”
“It’s alright to be different. Your life is nothing to be ashamed of. I know that some of the other residents have started to mention…things…to you in the halls.”
“They make fun of me for being bi.” She lifts her eyebrow, and I feel stupid. “Bi means bisexual.”
“Kylie, I know what bi means.”
I feel even stupider, and I duck my face again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to–”
“It’s alright. You have a lot on your mind right now, and I understand that. The first few weeks are the hardest. But it will get better, you have to trust that. Our Goddess would not have picked you if she didn’t think you could handle this new life.”
I nod, and pull away from the table. “What happens now? I’m supposed to be dead, right? And McKenzie knows I’m not.”
“Let me worry about that. Right now, I want you to head to lunch with Tara and your friends. Relax, Kylie. You’re not in trouble.”
I take a deep breath and nod. “Thank you, Jillian.”
I leave Jillian still on her knees in the chapel, and head down to the dining room. The instant Tara sees me, she knows that something’s wrong, and hugs me. Of course, then I’m fighting not to burst into tears, and I have to explain everything to her and my friends. When I’m done, they’re all just staring at me, and I wonder if they might be scared of me.
Surprisingly, Morgan’s the first to say anything. She puts her hand on my shoulder and smiles. “Kylie, we’ve all experienced bloodlust before. It’s not a big deal. Jillian told you that the boy would be fine, and she’s going to take care of McKenzie. You made a mistake, but that’s alright because you’re new. Nobody expects you to be perfect yet.”
I smile, and wipe my hand across my eyes. “Thanks, Morgan.”
�
��Yeah, Kylie,” Austin says. “The first time I experienced real bloodlust was that first Controlling Bloodlust lesson. I would have been willing to attack anyone that got in my way, but you saved me. We’re all savages in the beginning.”
We finish lunch talking about anything we can think of and, when I’m done, I hand my tray off to be washed and head out into the hall. I’m barely out the door when someone bumps into me, sending me crashing to the floor.
The Awakening (Daray Hall #1) Page 13
