CHAPTER XLVI
THE DECORATION OF SAMMY
Smith leaned against the mantelpiece in the senior day-room atOutwood's--since Mike's innings against Downing's the Lost Lambs hadbeen received as brothers by that centre of disorder, so that evenSpiller was compelled to look on the hatchet as buried--and gave hisviews on the events of the preceding night, or, rather, of thatmorning, for it was nearer one than twelve when peace had once morefallen on the school.
"Nothing that happens in this luny-bin," said Psmith, "has power tosurprise me now. There was a time when I might have thought it alittle unusual to have to leave the house through a canvas shoot atone o'clock in the morning, but I suppose it's quite the regular thinghere. Old school tradition, &c. Men leave the school, and find thatthey've got so accustomed to jumping out of window that they look onit as a sort of affectation to go out by the door. I suppose none ofyou merchants can give me any idea when the next knockaboutentertainment of this kind is likely to take place?"
"I wonder who rang that bell!" said Stone. "Jolly sporting idea."
"I believe it was Downing himself. If it was, I hope he's satisfied."
Jellicoe, who was appearing in society supported by a stick, lookedmeaningly at Mike, and giggled, receiving in answer a stony stare.Mike had informed Jellicoe of the details of his interview with Mr.Barley at the "White Boar," and Jellicoe, after a momentary splutterof wrath against the practical joker, was now in a particularlylight-hearted mood. He hobbled about, giggling at nothing and atpeace with all the world.
"It was a stirring scene," said Psmith. "The agility with whichComrade Jellicoe boosted himself down the shoot was a triumph of mindover matter. He seemed to forget his ankle. It was the nearest thingto a Boneless Acrobatic Wonder that I have ever seen."
"I was in a beastly funk, I can tell you."
Stone gurgled.
"So was I," he said, "for a bit. Then, when I saw that it was all arag, I began to look about for ways of doing the thing really well. Iemptied about six jugs of water on a gang of kids under my window."
"I rushed into Downing's, and ragged some of the beds," said Robinson.
"It was an invigorating time," said Psmith. "A sort of pageant. I wasparticularly struck with the way some of the bright lads caught holdof the idea. There was no skimping. Some of the kids, to my certainknowledge, went down the shoot a dozen times. There's nothing likedoing a thing thoroughly. I saw them come down, rush upstairs, and besaved again, time after time. The thing became chronic with them. Ishould say Comrade Downing ought to be satisfied with the high stateof efficiency to which he has brought us. At any rate I hope----"
There was a sound of hurried footsteps outside the door, and Sharpe, amember of the senior day-room, burst excitedly in. He seemed amused.
"I say, have you chaps seen Sammy?"
"Seen who?" said Stone. "Sammy? Why?"
"You'll know in a second. He's just outside. Here, Sammy, Sammy,Sammy! Sam! Sam!"
A bark and a patter of feet outside.
"Come on, Sammy. Good dog."
There was a moment's silence. Then a great yell of laughter burstforth. Even Psmith's massive calm was shattered. As for Jellicoe, hesobbed in a corner.
Sammy's beautiful white coat was almost entirely concealed by a thickcovering of bright red paint. His head, with the exception of theears, was untouched, and his serious, friendly eyes seemed toemphasise the weirdness of his appearance. He stood in the doorway,barking and wagging his tail, plainly puzzled at his reception. He wasa popular dog, and was always well received when he visited any of thehouses, but he had never before met with enthusiasm like this.
"Good old Sammy!"
"What on earth's been happening to him?"
"Who did it?"
Sharpe, the introducer, had no views on the matter.
"I found him outside Downing's, with a crowd round him. Everybodyseems to have seen him. I wonder who on earth has gone and mucked himup like that!"
Mike was the first to show any sympathy for the maltreated animal.
"Poor old Sammy," he said, kneeling on the floor beside the victim,and scratching him under the ear. "What a beastly shame! It'll takehours to wash all that off him, and he'll hate it."
"It seems to me," said Psmith, regarding Sammy dispassionately throughhis eyeglass, "that it's not a case for mere washing. They'll eitherhave to skin him bodily, or leave the thing to time. Time, the GreatHealer. In a year or two he'll fade to a delicate pink. I don't seewhy you shouldn't have a pink bull-terrier. It would lend a touch ofdistinction to the place. Crowds would come in excursion trains to seehim. By charging a small fee you might make him self-supporting. Ithink I'll suggest it to Comrade Downing."
"There'll be a row about this," said Stone.
"Rows are rather sport when you're not mixed up in them," saidRobinson, philosophically. "There'll be another if we don't start offfor chapel soon. It's a quarter to."
There was a general move. Mike was the last to leave the room. As hewas going, Jellicoe stopped him. Jellicoe was staying in that Sunday,owing to his ankle.
"I say," said Jellicoe, "I just wanted to thank you again aboutthat----"
"Oh, that's all right."
"No, but it really was awfully decent of you. You might have got intoa frightful row. Were you nearly caught?"
"Jolly nearly."
"It _was_ you who rang the bell, wasn't it?"
"Yes, it was. But for goodness sake don't go gassing about it, orsomebody will get to hear who oughtn't to, and I shall be sacked."
"All right. But, I say, you _are_ a chap!"
"What's the matter now?"
"I mean about Sammy, you know. It's a jolly good score off oldDowning. He'll be frightfully sick."
"Sammy!" cried Mike. "My good man, you don't think I did that, do you?What absolute rot! I never touched the poor brute."
"Oh, all right," said Jellicoe. "But I wasn't going to tell any one,of course."
"What do you mean?"
"You _are_ a chap!" giggled Jellicoe.
Mike walked to chapel rather thoughtfully.
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