by K E Osborn
Letting out a frustrated groan, I throw another dress on the bed as I flop down on the mattress. “I can’t do this on my own!” Turning on my side, I pick up my cell, dialing the one person who I know will help me.
The phone rings a few times, then the line answers, “Please tell me you have a cure for a hangover?” Scarlett drones, sounding terrible.
A lazy smirk crosses my face. “Let me guess, you went out last night after work and you’ve had an hour’s sleep?”
“Oh, honey, please… I still have a vodka tonic in my hand right now.”
I peek up at the time, widening my eyes. “Scar, it’s ten-thirty, you haven’t slept yet?”
“Sometimes a woman’s just gotta let off some of that pent-up steam. Mama’s got an uncontrollable urge in her loins which needs—”
“Jesus, Scar, okay, I’m sorry I asked. Where are you?”
She’s quiet for a pass, then chuckles. “I actually have no fucking clue, maybe a frat house?”
Resting my head in my hands, I shake my head. “Can you Uber it over here? I need help.”
“Oh, sweet thing, I know you need help, but what disaster is befalling you right now?”
Snorting at her vocabulary, I look at the pile of clothes on my bed. “I don’t know what to wear.”
“To your date?”
“Is it a date?”
Scarlett slurps down the line, obviously drinking something. “Oh, yeah, it’s a date.”
My stomach swirls. I haven’t been on a date in so freaking long. I’m not even sure I want to do this. Dash is flighty, he’s all over the place. He still holds a torch for this Ivy chick, but there’s something about him drawing me in. Maybe that’s the dangerous part. I have to be careful because when it comes to men in my life, it’s not just me I need to think about. I have a son, a beautiful, impressionable, amazing son, who will look to said guy as someone important. So any guy in my life, is going to need to be someone pretty fucking amazing.
Is Dash that guy?
I guess I will find out today.
“So… can you come over?”
“My Uber is on its way. You should know I’d never pass up an opportunity to glam you up.”
Smiling, my nerves ease slightly. “I have to be at the café at twelve thirty. Means I have two hours to get ready and head over there. Think we can get this done?”
“Lady, have you met me? I work miracles in under thirty seconds.”
“I’m not a hand job, Scar.”
She snickers. “Right, sorry, forgot what we were talking about for a second. Pick out some outfits, and I’ll make you beautiful in fifteen minutes. Promise.”
“Okay, see you soon.”
“Pour me a wine!”
“I don’t have any wi—”
It’s too late, she’s ended the call.
I jump up from the bed, then grab out a myriad of outfits as I wait for Scarlett to arrive. Not ten minutes later, the keys are being inserted in my front door, and I let out a contented sigh. “Thank God!”
Making my way through my room, I enter the open plan area as she walks in, obviously still in her clothes from last night, sunglasses on, hair wild and untamed. She really did have a good time. Whatever it was she was doing. Or more namely—who. She throws her hands up in the air, tipping out her hip. “Party’s here, where’s my wine?”
I snort out a laugh. “I smell you from here. Bitch, you don’t need any more alcohol, you need a coffee, stat!”
She waves me off. “Fine, fine. Hit me with the caffeine. I need to be sober for work tonight, anyway.”
“You’re planning on staying awake for work tonight. Scarlett, no, you need to stay here and sleep this off while I’m out. We can go to work together tonight.”
She pouts. “Okay, Mom.” She walks over, then pulls me in for a hug. “You always were the more sensible one of the two of us.” I giggle at her ranting, but she pulls back dramatically, yanking her sunglasses down to look me in the eyes. “I need you to be careful with Dash. Don’t get your hopes up. He’s still getting calls from that other girl he was longing after.”
“What? Really?”
She yanks me down onto the kitchen seat, following me. “I saw it one night after work. He didn’t answer the message or anything, but he’s conflicted. I only want what’s best for you, and Dash… he’s flighty. He was so hung up on this Ivy chick when he originally came in, and it hasn’t been that long… you don’t just fall out of love with someone that easily.”
Suddenly, nervous about it all, I grab my cell, opening the Messenger app as Scarlett watches me intently. “What are you doing?”
“I’m not sure.”
Me: Hey, so do you still wanna do this lunch thing? Totally cool if you wanna bail…
I hover over the send button, wondering why I’m doing this.
Am I hoping for an out?
Or is it because Scarlett is kind of freaking me the hell out right now? Maybe.
Or maybe I want him to prove to me he’s not what she’s saying.
I hit send while Scarlett peers over the phone, trying to see. “Did you just cancel?”
“Gave him the option to.”
“Well, I think that’s the right mo—”
Suddenly, my cell starts ringing, and I glance down to see Dash’s name lighting my screen.
I wasn’t expecting that.
Standing, I start pacing my kitchen, swiping the answer button to bring the cell to my ear. “Hey!”
“Hey… I’m all good if you are. I’m looking forward to it. But… if you’re having a change of heart, I get it.” The disappointment in his tone doesn’t go unnoticed, and it instantly makes me feel like shit.
I love Scarlett, but sometimes her advice can be total shit.
“No, not at all. We’re still good for 12:30 at Café on Logan?”
“Definitely. You want me to pick you up?”
I walk into my living room seeing all of Cruz’s toys scattered around. Dash doesn’t know about my son, and him walking in seeing Cruz’s shit is not the way I want him to find out. “No, I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay, see you in an hour, forty-five.”
“Great, see you then.” I end the call, flopping down on the sofa, feeling like a teenage girl.
Scarlett lets out a small laugh as she peers over the top of the sofa, looking down at me. “You look perplexed.”
“I don’t know what to do!”
Scarlett walks around, grabs my legs, lifts them and sits beneath them, placing them on her lap. “Okay, shrink time, talk to me?”
“Dash is treating me like we’re in the friend zone, and I don’t know why. Something shifted when I told him my name. Like maybe the secrecy was alluring but then when I told him, something changed… I can’t work it out.”
“So, what’s got you confused?”
“Now he’s all in again. Like he’s trying as if something sparked his interest. Maybe it’s Ivy? Maybe he was still hung up on her and now he’s let her go? I don’t fucking know, I can’t put two and two together right now, but I need to get dressed for this fucking lunch and figure out how the hell I’m going to play this… is it a friendly lunch or a date? I don’t know because he’s confusing the shit outta me!”
Scarlett pats my leg, her face completely serious. “And this… my love, is why I’m telling you to be careful. When you aren’t sure where you stand, that’s a warning in and of itself.”
I exhale flopping back onto the sofa. I guess I need to make a decision on how I want to play this—I know which one I would prefer. I like Dash, even with all his confusing and crazy ways. He might be all over the place—and that definitely screams danger—but he’s been there when it counts. Though, I still need to be cautious because he’s unreliable, and that’s never good for a woman like me, with baggage and another little man in my life I need to think about.
“C’mon, let’s get me dressed, or I’ll spend the next hour and a half sulking and have to go wea
ring this!” I glimpse down at my hoody and sweats, and Scarlet turns up her nose.
“No. I’m not Dash’s biggest fan, but girl, I can’t let you leave the house wearing that. C’mon, let’s get you ready for your non-date date.”
Huffing, we walk to my bedroom and get to work.
An hour later, I’m wearing a knee-length yellow dress, my hair’s in a messy bun, and my makeup is casual, but still a little edgier than normal. I look nice. Not how Dash has ever seen me, so he’s going to know I’ve put a little extra effort in for him today. I just hope I’m not reading this whole lunch thing wrong because then I’ll look like a fucking idiot.
“Now twirl!” Scarlett chimes.
“I’m not fucking twirling for you like some princess. I am not Cinderella.”
She dips her chin in agreement. “No, my sweet, you are not. You’re the fucking queen… minus the evil parts.”
“I’ll take that.”
“You look gorgeous, Shadow. He’d be stupid not to see it.”
Smiling, I lean in kissing her forehead. “Thanks. Now drink a coffee and get some sleep.”
“When Dash sees you, he’s gonna be all over you like white on rice, but don’t get too caught up in what this is or isn’t, okay? Just feel him out, not to be confused with feeling him up because darling, doing that in public can land you in the slammer… I should know.”
“I remember, I had to get Vince to bail you out.”
“Good times, good times!”
“I’m leaving now.”
“Have fun, but not too much. He’s handsome for sure, but I don’t trust him.”
Rolling my shoulders, I grab my bag and head for the door. “Sleep.”
“Message me when you land, I wanna know you’re safe.”
“I’m not flying anywhere, Scarlett.”
“Potato potahto.” She pulls the blanket over her as she snuggles up on the sofa.
Closing my front door, I shake my head. Stopping in the hall of my apartment building, I take in a deep breath.
You can do this, Shadow.
Dash is not Tyler.
He’s nothing like him.
Doesn’t look like him.
Doesn’t talk like him.
And he certainly doesn’t act like him.
Dash. Is. Not. Him.
A cold shiver runs down my spine, thinking of Tyler and the hell he put me through. Of everything I did, everything I still do to keep away from him.
Oh, God! If he ever found out where I am…
My entire body shudders as I hold my bag to me tighter. I rid the thought from my mind as I take one step forward. I’m trying to change my life. And I’m doing that here, with Cruz, at The Drunken Lime, and maybe with Dash. I can’t hold myself back from people and things because of one asshole for the rest of my life. That’s not living, it’s not even existing, and I don’t want to do that anymore.
So, I put my other foot in front, and I keep walking all the way to my car. Pulling out my cell, I type another message to Dash.
Me: Leaving now… see you soon ;)
I hit send, shove my cell back in my bag and start the car. Logan Street isn’t far from my apartment, so with newfound freedom, I make the short journey with excitement flowing through me. I’m meeting Dash for lunch. I have no clue how it’s going to go, but I’m all in for it and ready to go.
As I pull into the parking lot, I can’t see his bike anywhere, so he’s obviously not here yet. That’s good, it gives me a second to get inside and find the best table.
Pulling out my cell, I check it.
He hasn’t seen my message.
He’s probably on his way and can’t check.
Hopping out of the car, I make my way inside the cute little café. I grab a table by the open window overlooking the manmade lake and sit, letting the soft breeze wash over my skin. I thought I’d be nervous, but sitting here waiting, I’m actually quite relaxed and calm. The thing about Dash is we get along so well. He has his faults, but we make a great team. Whether we’re friends or more, I guess I don’t mind which way it goes, as long as he’s in my life because it’s been better with him in it.
A waitress comes past, smiling at me. “Hi honey, is there anything I can get for you today?”
“Oh hey, I’m meeting someone, but maybe you can bring out some water for two, please?”
She turns, walking back to the counter as I stare out at the lake. Ducks swim happily, enjoying the midday sun. It’s a beautiful day as I check my cell again, the message is still unread. My muscles tense a little tighter wondering if he’s okay. As the waitress brings the water over, I thank her, and she leaves.
Dash is officially late by ten minutes, and I guess it’s not a big deal. There could be congestion on the highway or anything could have gone wrong.
I wait another ten minutes, watching the giant ornate clock on the wall, and with every second ticking over, my anxiety grows and grows.
First, I fear that something is wrong, so I send another text message.
It too goes unread.
An hour passes, and my fear morphs into frustration. Frustration that he doesn’t have the decency to message or fucking call if he’s going to be this late.
Once it hits two hours of me sitting here, without having any lunch, looking like that girl who’s been stood up, the undeniable anger swarms through me like a raging torrent. My fists clench at my sides as the waitress looks at me sympathetically from behind the counter.
Fuck her, and fuck Dash too!
Standing, the chair legs scrape on the floor making everyone in the café turn to look at me. Great! My teeth grind together as I hoist my bag over my shoulder, then head for the door. My feet pound so hard the force of the vibration rattles all the way up through to my knees.
I knew I couldn’t trust Dash.
This is what guys do. They lead you on, make you begin to trust them, then bam, they bail on you for no good reason.
Storming out to my car, I pull out my keys, pressing the button for the door when my cell rings. My muscles tense as I hesitate but pull it out seeing Dash’s name lighting up the screen.
Oh no, you don’t get to call me two hours later and think you can make this shit okay!
I swipe the call ready to unleash on him. I don’t care if I’m in the middle of a parking lot, I’m going to tell him how much of an asshole he is.
“Now I know why your name is Dash! Because that’s what you do when shit gets real. You make a dash for it, right?”
He exhales down the line. “Shadow—”
“I don’t want to hear whatever lame-ass excuse you have for me, Dash. You left me hanging! You left me here at a café looking like one of those desperate girls waiting for the guy to show. And you know what, Dash? I looked like the fool. Because you made me out to be one. I can’t believe I trusted you! How could I be so fucking stupid?”
“I wante—”
“I thought today was something… I wasn’t sure what. I didn’t know what it meant, Dash, but I was excited to find out. Obviously, I mean jack of all shits to you, for you to pull a fucking stunt like this. I don’t want to talk to you, Dash… not for a while anyway. You hurt me. Really hurt me, you prick!”
I end the call on that note and tears well in my eyes. But I won’t let him get the better of me. I open my car door dramatically, then slam it shut with force while letting out an almighty scream, smash my hands on the roof a few times, then open the door so I can slam it shut again in frustration.
A woman across the parking lot scampers across into the café away from me as I lose my shit, but I don’t care that I look like a maniac right now. I spin, resting my back against the car door as I take in a deep centering breath to calm myself down.
Suddenly, my cell starts ringing again. I let out a whimper when I look down at Dash’s name flashing. My initial instinct is to hurtle my phone across the lot, but I slide the screen, answering the call anyway. “What, Dash? What!”
“I�
�m so fucking sorry,” he blurts out before I unleash on him again.
Clenching my eyes tight, I rub at my face. “Why?” I whisper.
He clears his throat like he’s having trouble talking due to emotion. “The club called. They issued my punishment. I had to leave when they told me, or…” he hesitates, and I open the door sinking into the seat of my car.
I wipe a tear, slowly falling down my cheek and finish his sentence, “Or you’d be in deep shit with them instead of me.”
He exhales. “Something like that.”
“I guess they might actually kill you. Whereas I just really freaking want to but won’t… suppose that’s the difference.”
“Shadow—”
“Are you okay?”
He sniffs. “Yeah, they sent me on protective detail. I can’t say much in case my line is tapped, but it’s shit. I wish I could be with you more than anything, Shadow, and I mean that.”
He sounds like he’s telling the truth. I guess I won’t know for sure, but what option do I have right now other than to believe him?
“You promise you didn’t bail on me?”
“I swear on everything. I want to be there so fucking bad… it kills me that I’m here and not there.”
I hesitate, my stomach churning.
But what can I do?
What can I say?
“Raincheck, then?”
He lets out a small laugh. “Yeah, raincheck.”
“Dash?”
“Yeah, Badass?”
“Are you in danger where you are?”
“If we do our job right, then no, but there’s always the off-chance someone can find us.”
“How long will you be away for?”
“Hard to say, but I’ll keep in contact. I promise. In the meantime, I’m getting Ominous to come do security for you. And don’t worry, he doesn’t talk too much.”
“Okay… Dash?”
