Sexy Addiction

by Naughty Aphrodite

  The anger burst out of him, as well as the grief - both for the woman he’d thought he had lost forever, and the girl that he had sacrificed to save her. But was any of it worth it? He had been wrong, he knew, but he had been too scared to have made an alternative choice. He knew that his failure to save the little girl was a scar that would be forever engraved in his heart, and one that would be impossible to forget.

  However, all he asked in return for this sear of his conscience, was that Aisha would respond to him as he hoped, and bring his torment to an end. That would be a price well worth any sacrifice, but instead, she was shutting him out, the more he tried to get closer to her.

  He didn’t know what to do! Frustrated and angry, he wiped his tears and began to head towards her office.

  When he arrived, he pushed the door open and slammed it shut behind him. She had been reading what looked to be a journal on her table, but the moment she saw him, he noted the resentment that came into her eyes and it infuriated him all the more.

  “What have I done to you?” he roared. “Why are you treating me this way?”

  He came around the table and banged his hand against it. She jumped in fright and tried to rise but he placed his hands on both handles of her chair and caged her in.

  “What have I done that is so wrong?” he asked. “Why are you hiding from me? Do you know what I have been through these past few years? Do you know the pain that you have caused me?”

  The tears fell down from his reddened eyes as he yelled. “I regret the day that I fell in love with you. Do you hear me? I regret it with all of my heart. If I had known that you would become so selfish and heartless, then I would have stopped myself from falling into this trap, even if I’d had to tear my own heart out. How could you do this? How could you run away and leave me to believe you were dead? And even now that I have found you, how could you remain so heartless and still continue to torment me? Do I not deserve peace? Do I not deserve sympathy also? Why do you think yourself the only victim here? Tell me! Why?”

  He looked into her eyes to see the tears gather in them. “Why do you think I am here?” was all she said.

  A few moments passed by, and his blood tipped over. He pushed her coat aside, and despite her struggle, held onto the collars of her silk blouse and ripped them apart. Buttons went flying everywhere just as he revealed the tattoo between her breasts.

  “What is that?” he asked, as he stared at it. He then lifted his head to gaze into her eyes. “She had that exact same tattoo, in the exact same place, and she looked exactly like you. Unless you have truly lost your memory, who do you think you are trying to fool?!? She also had a birthmark that I am aware of, it was on her right hip. Perhaps I should confirm that also…” he shouted and gripped the button on her jeans.

  Alarmed, she tried to push his hands away. “Caleb!” she yelled, but it was only when he ripped the zip down that her hand flung out and struck him across his face.

  A few silent moments passed between them before he spoke again. “Make sure to put a bag of ice on that hand,” he said. He straightened and walked out of her office.

  ***

  Aisha watched him go, distraught as he walked away. Coming to this hospital had been a very bad decision, and she had known it from the very start. She had been here less than a day, and things were already falling apart.

  However, could she leave? And if she did, where would she go? She had nothing or no one else.

  Seeing him shed tears and in that much pain, had driven a blade through her heart, and she needed to take it out. She laid down her fears for the moment, and eventually, she was able to make a decision. Minutes later, she rose and found herself heading toward his office.

  When she arrived, she took a deep breath before she knocked, and was granted entrance.

  “Dr. Pace-” she began as she walked in, but then stopped in her tracks when she saw an elderly woman, attired in a priceless looking ivory suit speaking to him. At first, she gazed blankly at the woman, too startled to speak, but then she turned her eyes toward Caleb and mustered up a tight smile. "You seem really busy,” she said. “I’ll come back.”

  He shook his head and ordered her to come in and take a seat. The woman turned then and the moment her eyes fell on her, she gasped aloud and held onto her chest. Aisha looked from Caleb to his mother, speechless as to what to do.

  “This is my mother,” he introduced sourly, and the woman gazed back at him like he was crazy. She began to retreat backward as though Aisha were a ghost, raising shaky hands to point directly at her.

  “Mom,” Caleb rose, and Aisha immediately retreated. “I’ll come back,” she blurted and shut the door behind her.

  Chapter 13

  “What the hell was that?” Caleb’s mother screamed, and for a second, he was worried that the shock would go to her heart. So he came around the table and held her.

  “Mom.”

  “A-i, Aisha?”

  “Mom, please sit down, I’ll explain,” he said, and managed to lower her into her seat. After a few more minutes, she was finally calmed and he was able to speak. “She’s not Aisha,” he said. “But she does bear a striking resemblance to her.”

  “What do you mean by she’s not Aisha?” she shrieked. “Are you blind?”

  “I would know more than anyone if she were her, Mom. I know the marks on her body and I performed the surgery on her.”

  “What are you saying?” she cried. “She is dressed as a doctor. How can there be such a coincidence in the world?”

  With a deep sigh, Caleb accepted his defeat and gazed at his mother. “You’re still such a terrible liar,” she said to him. “Who do you think you’re trying to fool?”

  Defeated, he looked away. “This is unheard of. Why doesn’t she recognize me?”

  “She doesn’t recognize me either,” he said. “She lost her memory.”

  “How?”

  “I have no idea,” he replied. “Her current name is Joan.”

  “How did she come here? How did you find her? Is that why you left the city and moved to this tiny town?”

  “Meeting her is pure coincidence, Mom. She was brought in as a traffic accident patient a few weeks ago.”

  “How can one girl be so much trouble?” she asked. “Her entire existence is an accident, even her connection to you. I wish you’d never met her. She has caused such damage to all of us.”

  “Mom…” he cautioned, and she heeded his warning.

  She remained with him for a bit longer until he had to leave to see a patient.

  “I’m not comfortable with her here,” she said to him as he escorted her to her car.

  “Everything will be fine,” he said to her, repeating the assurance so many times that he lost count. Eventually, she took her leave.

  When she was gone, he turned around to look at the building and sighed deeply. He was still so unable to lie to others, but perhaps the only person he was able to lie was to himself. Would anything ever be alright? Perhaps it was time for him to accept this fact, or were his hopes still worth clinging to?

  He reentered the building, and waiting for him in the reception was the woman who kept turning his life upside down. She held up a CT scan for him. “I need your consult,” she said, and he nodded. They headed quietly up the grand stairs and toward the Oncology Room where she shut the door behind them.

  She placed the CT scan against the monitor and began to speak. “The patient just came in with a blade wedged between his two ribs,” she said. “He has tears to the pericardium and his lungs, but I’m afraid that he has also damaged a major artery. I should be able to take the blade out and quickly stop the bleeding but… look here.”

  “Is that a tumor?” Caleb asked.

  “It is. And the blade is too close, the tumor might be malignant. The tumor is also too close to this artery.”

  He sucked in his breath. “This is a difficult one.”

  “It is.”
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  “Let’s ignore the glass for a while and focus on taking out the tumor first. We can then send it for a quick lab test. If it’s malignant, then we perform a lobectomy.”

  “It might be too difficult to keep the blade in place as you remove the tumor,” she said. “Any slight movement and the bleeding can become uncontrollable.”

  “Well, it has to be done. Are you up for the challenge?”

  “Me?”

  “Sure, he is your patient.”

  She took a deep breath. “I don’t- I don’t know. I’m not even sure if I’ve been in an OR before.”

  Her response broke his heart. “When will you stop lying?” he asked. “Both to me and yourself? Perhaps you have forgotten the complexity of the procedure you carried out this morning. Even I cannot convince myself that I would be brave enough to make such a call if I’d been in your position. You literally cut open a man’s abdomen in the ER but yet you do not think you’ve ever been in an OR before?”

  She shut her eyes and sighed deeply. “Why won’t you let me be?” she asked, her voice low and as tormented as he was.

  “What bothers me the most is that you can actually let me go. I see this truth in front of my eyes, and yet, I refuse to believe it and it’s driving me insane. But I need to know why otherwise there will remain this sliver of hope in my heart that will eventually end me. I don’t believe that it was because you didn’t love me that you disappeared without a word. It has to be something else, something so scary that it could overpower everything. Even if I wasn’t as important as I had thought, you would have never just given up your career to live this way. You loved it way too much… you were too dedicated. So, since I truly love you like I claim, I cannot just let you be. But you can relax. I’m not begging you to come back to me, but I will give you back your life, and your career. I will find the answers that you are too afraid to reveal.” He stood up to leave, but then she caught his hand.

  “Don’t turn around,” she begged and he did as she asked.

  He waited, but she didn’t say a word and he knew that she was fighting with herself. Eventually, she spoke, “I’ll join you in surgery.” He nodded in response.

  To him, it was far from a satisfactory answer, but for the first time, he had received hope. She had been called out already... but she was still too scared to own up to it. He had to applaud her either way, for if she had not caved in with those moments of silence, then he would still have been doubtful. But in those few seconds, she had said all that he needed to hear, without her speaking a word.

  She wanted him to help her search for the answers that she could not find, but at the same time, she didn’t want him to. However, she didn’t have the courage to outrightly deny him, because perhaps that would be her only chance to regain her life. That was all he needed to know.

  He headed over to the locker room, got changed and prepared for the surgery.

  Chapter 14

  As Aisha watched him work, she felt chills run through her body. It was a sort of euphoria that she was familiar with but had not experienced in a long time.

  In the heat of the emergency procedure she had done earlier, she had been so panicked out of her mind that she had failed to recognize it, but now that someone else had the reigns and all she did was assist, her eyes welled up with tears.

  She watched as he succeeded in safely removing the tumor and then placed it on a tray to be immediately sent for a test.

  Before she became a surgeon, she had already been awed at how humans had gone past the barrier of the flesh when it came to saving lives and into the territory of cutting the human body open to get to the source of an illness. When she had been gifted the chance to lead her first surgery, she had been terrified but so full of joy that at the end she had not wanted to leave the OR.

  Her patient’s surgery had been successful, and she had watched an almost dead mother of three leave the OR with renewed chance at life, all because of the surgery that she had performed. Now seeing it all again, she was stunned at how she could have forgotten this.

  How she could have allowed her fear and grief to overwhelm her so, that she had given up on the one thing that gave meaning to her life.

  The door to the OR swung open and a nurse came in to announce the results. “Dr. Pace, the tumor is benign.”

  “Alright then. Prolene suture. Forceps.”

  She watched, perhaps too attentively as he began to repair the artery. His hands moving so purposefully, as though he were playing a musical instrument, the notes engraved into his heart. His technique was pure magic and it reminded her that it was one of the things that had first attracted him to her. As an intern, and when they were not slaving away with work, they would sit in their break room and gossip about their superiors.

  She raised her head to gaze at him and recalled in awe, the first time she had heard of him.

  “Did you hear of the artificial heart replacement surgery that Dr. Pace performed today?”

  “I did,” came the response. “That was a surgery scheduled for nine hours, but he would have lost the patient if it had taken that long. The bastard completed the entire thing under six freaking hours.”

  “That’s impossible!”

  “It should be, but the guy is a wizard,” another lamented. “Which of us here even after years of slaving away would ever be able to carry out such a feat?”

  One of her colleagues had run in then with excitement. “I got the tape! I got Dr. Pace’s surgery procedure.”

  They had all gathered like vultures to a carcass. Those that were too hungry to let their food go held onto it as they watched, while others boiling with ambition dumped their meals and grabbed their notepads. Hours later they had all collapsed back in exhaustion, the entire room of almost seven interns struck with awe.

  “I can’t believe we’re also wearing a white coat like he is,” someone said, and she couldn’t have agreed more.

  “Dr. Graves!” she heard the bark, and it jerked her back to the present.

  “I’m so sorry,” she immediately apologized and cut the string of the suture that he had just completed. However, she couldn’t help the smile on her face.

  “Are you smiling?” he asked, and she wiped it away before lifting up her head. “Of course not, I mean... no, I’m not.”

  He stared with eyes that had never ceased to unsettle her. “Can you close him up?”

  Her eyes widened slightly. “Um, sure, I would love to.”

  “Have at it,” he said, and she went over to his side of the table. She picked up her needle and laced the string through the flesh, drawing out the thread with precision. It took her a few moments to get used to it once again, but before she knew it, everything came back to her. She was done in no time, and the operation was declared a success.

  They stood side by side to wash their hands, and her nervousness came rushing back. “You were smiling in the OR?” he asked.

  “I apologize.”

  She quickly rinsed her hands, grabbed a paper towel, and hurried off before he could say anything else. A few minutes later, she was updating charts at the nurse’s station in the ER when one of the residents came over to her. He was a slim, red-haired guy with a good mustache and friendly eyes.

  “Hey,” he greeted, and she smiled back politely.

  “Hello.”

  “I’m Jeremy Reed.”

  “I’m Aisha Graves.”

  “I missed your introduction to the team, but I heard what you did today in the ER. You sounded pretty amazing. I am a wimp, there is no way I would have taken such a risk.”

  She blushed at the compliment. “That’s probably because you have common sense, unlike me. I’m a ticking time bomb.”

  “Incoming patient!” someone suddenly yelled, and they both looked up to see some paramedic officials rolling in a bloodied patient.

  “Duty calls,” he said, and they both headed over.

  A few hours later, he came
back to her and said, “We’re about to head out for a quick drink. Are you down?”

  She gazed at the clock on the wall. “Our shift is not over yet.”

  “It’ll be over in an hour,” he said. “Since some of the bars are still open, we want to catch a drink and perhaps something to eat before we head home. You should come along, it’ll be a chance to get to know the rest of the team better.”

  “Who will tend to the patients?”