“It’s Tobias.” She didn’t respond, hoping he might disappear. But soon the door swung open, and Tobias stepped inside. “Hey.” He shut the door behind him softly. “Don’t listen to what Dad said. He can be insensitive sometimes.”
Sam sat and slammed her feet on the floor. “It’s like he doesn’t even care.”
“He’s the mayor, Sam.” Tobias sat next to her. “He needs to look forward.”
Sam stared into his far-reaching eyes. Through them she could see a man standing on the stage of the courtyard. A hand in the air, his mouth open wide. It was Tobias’ dream to take over Dad’s job as the mayor someday. He had known this since he was little. Always dressed the same as Dad with his fancy collared shirts tucked into his pants. Ate the same foods. Laughed at the same time. Copied that same, fake smile.
“Well unlike you, I hate being part of this family.”
He frowned. “Don’t say that.”
“Already said it.” Sam crossed her arms. “One day you’ll realize that Dad isn’t the perfect man you see him to be. Sure, he’s the mayor, but he’s still like us. He’s still human.”
Tobias stared at the wall. For a while he didn’t say a word, and Sam was confident she won her made-up battle. But eventually, he took a deep breath and spoke.
“I never knew the girl.” He didn’t look at her. “But I do admit that I’m sorry for the kid.”
“James?”
“Yeah.”
“Me too.” Sam folded her hands on her lap. “When he comes back, what do I do?”
Tobias rubbed his temple. “I think you need to keep things as normal as possible. Make him comfortable.”
“Sounds rough.”
“Well if anyone can do it, it’s you.” Tobias stood, then turned back with a wide grin. “Oh yeah, Mom says you’ve got dish duty tonight.”
“That was your deal.”
“Finals, Sam.” He waved over his shoulder. “Gotta study.”
“That’s two weeks away.”
“Classes are hard, Sis.” He slipped out the door with a grin.
“Sure.”
Sam sat alone in her empty room. She tried to remember what Tobias had said. That Mayor Perkins was simply looking forward. But as hard as she tried, she couldn’t get his words to leave her mind.
Sometimes, you don’t have that choice. Sam wrapped her arms around her knees and took a deep breath. And you have to move on. She shook her head. Move on. Move on. Move—
“How the hell do I do that?”
The lights were still glowing at their brightest, but the world darkened in her eyes. She glanced at the violin on her desk before slipping off the bed.
* * *
When Benji opened the front door, Rebecca was already home from work. She greeted him at the door with a wide smile. “How was school?”
He slipped off his shoes and silently walked past her.
“I have an idea.” She chased after him. “Why don’t we eat out tonight for a change?”
Benji paused, glancing over his shoulder. “I’m not hungry.”
“I know this is a hard time for you.” She sighed. “But you have to eat. It’ll make you feel better. Come on, let’s go! Put on your shoes.”
“Sorry.” Benji continued through the hall. “I’m not going.”
His room was as messy as ever, but he was pleased to be back. He hopped onto his bed to lie down, staring at the ceiling above. Why am I not sad? After turning onto his side, he narrowed his eyes at the envelope. He snatched it from his desk and held it in front of him. Is it because of you?
The truth was right in his fingertips. The date of his death was only a few rips away. He wanted to know so badly. And he considered the possibility that maybe opening it would help him move on from his curiosity. Maybe it would help him. A couple of rips. That’s all it would take. His grip on the envelope increased, and the room grew cold.
“Open it when you’re ready.” That’s what Nina had told him. “It’s a good opportunity. You can make reasonable plans for your future.”
“What did she mean by that?” Benji sat and tossed his feet over the edge of the bed. “And ready? How will I know when I am?”
The door busted open, and Rebecca stood in the entryway with stiff eyes. “I’m okay with you processing all of this, but I need you to eat.” Her eyes dropped to the red envelope in his hands. “What’s that?”
“Oh, it’s a—you know—birthday party invitation.”
She frowned. “From who?”
“Jett.” Benji bit his lip.
“That’s odd. He doesn’t usually invite you, does he?”
“Not really.” Benji tossed it onto his desk as if it were an old bill. “I don’t think I feel like going.”
Something about Rebecca’s face suddenly softened. She sat herself next to Benji and wrapped an arm around him. “You don’t have to deal with this alone, okay?” She took a deep breath. “I know what it’s like to lose someone. And I know it’s especially hard when the people around you are struggling too.”
His body went numb as he clenched his eyes shut. He wanted to tell her, No, that’s not why I’m upset. As much as it hurt knowing Nina was gone, the envelope never left his head. That stupid envelope! Whispering for him to come back. Haunting him.
Nina could tell the future. That was the only explanation that made sense to him. And maybe if he opened the envelope, he’d reach some kind of understanding. Maybe that envelope was the missing piece to the puzzle. But at the same time, was he going insane? No one believed in Nina’s crazy stories. She was a sick girl with a strong imagination, but was that really the truth?
It sounded a lot like that rumor about Stricket. He remembered hearing something about the man seeing a . . . what was it? A ghost? A foreign face? He couldn’t remember, but he did know that the story was oddly familiar. A boy no one believed in. A boy who claimed the impossible.
“Mom?” Benji looked at her and frowned. “Why didn’t you ever tell me you three were friends with Stricket?”
All traces of color left her face. She stared for a while, deep into his eyes, then shook her head gently. “Who told you that?”
“The mayor, Mom.” Benji looked back at the floor. “I remember these rumors about him being involved in some kind of supernatural . . . paranormal . . . I don’t know. But what if it was all true? What if he was like Nina? What if it’s really us who can’t understand their—”
“Benji!” She grabbed his shoulder and waited for him to look at her. “I won’t hear any more of this Oliver nonsense.”
“I was—”
“Why don’t you eat something?” She lightened her grip on his shoulder and smiled. “It might help you think straight.”
CHAPTER 9
cafeteria
“It’s good to have you back.” Mr. Trenton did his best to pull a genuine smile, only receiving a short nod in return.
James was late. Thirty-two minutes late, exactly. But that didn’t seem to matter. It didn’t matter to Mr. Trenton, and it certainly didn’t matter to the rest of the class. Everyone was more focused on his presence than his timing. Everyone except for Benji.
He didn’t smile at James. Didn’t look at him. He knew he should do something, but he couldn’t imagine what would be considered acceptable, so instead, he stared at his desk with frozen eyes.
Stares radiated past Benji in James’s direction. A rain of curious eyeballs. He heard Mr. Trenton plop onto his chair and roll to his desk, ending the lecture. Even he must have been staring.
Everyone waited for James to do something marvelous. After all, it was easier to react than be the actor. Today, James stood in the gold spotlight. He was the star of the play, and the star wasn’t moving.
So they waited.
James hadn’t spoken since he entered, and hadn’t moved
since he sat. Benji gathered the courage to glance at him, hoping he wouldn’t notice, and he didn’t. He looked the same as he always had. Same stylish clothes. Same haircut. Everything was the same.
But it didn’t feel right.
James moved his hand, leading the class to flinch in unison, but he had only reached to rub his eyes. It hadn’t even been a week yet. Had he come too early? Too late? How long was too late?
Benji folded his hands together. He wanted to think about James. He wanted to welcome him back to school. To see how he was doing. But his mind was too muddled to think. The envelope flashed in his mind, but he tucked the image away. He was stuck in a constant war with himself, his brain refusing to grant peace.
Sam leaned over the aisle. “You okay?”
Benji faced the opposite wall. He could see her watching him from the corner of his eye, but eventually, she looked away.
“Jeez, what’s with the weather?” Jett turned sideways in his seat, facing the class. He made eye contact with Benji for a moment and smiled. It wasn’t his usual rancid display of teeth. It was gentle, a slight bend of his lips. Jett wasn’t clueless this time. He was trying to break the tension.
The students sheltered their eyes. If they caught another soul’s gaze, they’d drag their chin in all directions until no one was in sight. Human eye contact was enough to kill. Even a hushed voice was poisonous.
But slowly, the eyes grew more comfortable. Benji heard Noah and Peyton whispering behind him. A light chattering filled the room, and he was grateful for it. The stiffness in the air tossed away, and with the loss of it came a casual attraction to James. No more vicious stares. No more vile silence.
Audrey spun around, facing James. “Hey.”
James looked at her blankly.
“Wanna have lunch with us in the music room today?”
Benji heard Sam huff, and for the first time, he didn’t judge her for it. How many times would Audrey ask him? James never replied. Every time, he was silent. Maybe Audrey thought she had the power to change his mind, but James’s brain was not a place easily tampered with.
James reached into his backpack, retrieving Sharpner’s Peak, and Benji squinted at the corner. One of the bottom corners was smashed into a wrinkly dent. An odd observation, considering James had always treated the book with intensive care.
He opened his book, but his eyes were on Audrey. The room brightened, the blinding blue reflection of the ocean washing through the window and into the classroom air. James smiled at her, and this time, he spoke.
“Maybe next time.”
* * *
The cafeteria was gray.
Benji ran his hand along their favorite lunch table. He knew the cafeteria tables were forest green, but no matter how hard he stared at them today, he couldn’t see it. A blurry fog filled his vision, mushing all the different colors of the room together until it no longer had a color. Although he couldn’t see the other middle schoolers eating, he could hear them. He could hear everything. The chewing, the chattering, the smacking of lips.
Chloe’s tuna sandwich had too much mayonnaise—Benji could tell by the way it squished as she bit into it. Sam ignored her strawberry soda, tapping her fingers against the table, humming a song that had been stuck on her mind all week. The notes filled Benji’s mind, mixing with the noises of food. The eating. The talking. The gulping.
The vibrations of Sam’s tapping on the table stopped. “What’s going on with you today?”
Benji raised his chin away from the table, searching for Sam’s face, but his focus redirected to James. Besides their love for puzzles and reading, James and Nina had nothing in common. But today, as Benji looked at his friend, all he could see was Nina. A face draining of color, a mask of bulletproof skin.
Benji rubbed his eyes—and Nina turned back into James. The sounds of the room intensified.
I have to ask him.
He slammed his eyes shut. The darkness overpowered the bright colors and sounds shooting through his brain.
“Last night, I almost did it.” Benji’s head flashed with a screen of blood red, but it happened so quickly he assumed the color was his imagination.
Chloe set her sandwich down. “Did what?”
The confidence flooded back to him, allowing the words to flow. “James,” Benji said. “Did Nina ever talk to you about the future?”
James didn’t flinch. He was a statue, frozen. But Benji could tell by the weird slant of his lips that he was biting them.
“Seriously, Benji?” Sam wrapped her hand around her soda, but she still didn’t drink it. “Are you stupid?”
James’s lip fell normal as he dropped his jaw to speak. “You fell for the act.”
“I didn’t fall,” Benji said. “I believed.”
“What are you guys talking about?” Chloe tapped her foot repeatedly against the floor, and Benji had a hard time tuning out the subtle taps.
“She gave me an envelope with my future and it—it’s driving me crazy!” The table shifted from gray to red, and he yanked his hand away. The table was hot. Burning. He felt the heat dissipate as the color morphed back into its usual green. “I can’t stop thinking about what she had to go through, and that I might—”
“That’s funny.” James’s mouth smiled, but his eyes didn’t. “My sister dies and she’s still the topic of discussion.”
The room darkened as James slid out of the bench, abandoning his cafeteria tray. He didn’t wave. He didn’t say goodbye.
“James?” The cafeteria sounds rumbled through his head, but he couldn’t hear himself. He was calling clearly, but no one was listening. Every word that left his lips drowned in the busy air, and for some absurd reason, he thought of Nina.
“Wow, great job.” Sam pointed to the cafeteria door. “Why the heck would you do that? He literally just came back. We should be acting normal.”
Chloe packed her sandwich back into the bag, no longer planning to eat it. “She has a point.”
Benji flicked the hair out of his face. “I’ve been confused lately.”
“You’re not confused, you idiot.” Sam raised her chin, pouring a stream of soda into her mouth. After a large gulp, her face went red. “You’re curious. Don’t you get it? This is the kind of stuff that happens when you keep asking all your stupid questions.”
“There’s no such thing as stupid questions.”
“Cute. Is that what your dad used to tell you?”
Chloe formed her hair into a ponytail. “Both of you, calm down.”
“You know what? Why don’t you pack your things and go find Scott?” Sam leaned toward him, lowering her voice. “I won’t stop you this time.”
“Hey, careful.” Chloe searched the room. “Someone could hear.”
“You don’t know when to stop, do you?” Benji stared at Sam’s fiery hair, his blood simmering.
“Me? I don’t know when to stop? James needs us right now, but you had to go and make a mess, like you always do.” She tossed her empty soda can into the closest trash bin and put her backpack on. “I’m gonna find him.”
Chloe had just put her hair in a ponytail when she took it down again. A few strands fell over her face like clean cuts in soft skin. “Sam, don’t.”
But it was too late. Sam stormed to the hall, each step louder than the last. The cafeteria exploded with whispers, and a group of seventh-graders tried to contain their laughter in the center of the room. They had probably been watching the scene since the beginning, considering James was the center of attention today. Benji had been too trapped in his own world to notice. Too trapped to notice anything, apparently.
“Hey, don’t worry too much.” The corner of Chloe’s lips tilted upward, a slight indication of what was meant to be a smile. “I’m sure they’ll both get over it. But try to be more—you know—careful next time.”
&n
bsp; CHAPTER 10
dinner
Apparently Benji’s luck was not ready to kick in. Mayor Perkins had invited him and Rebecca for dinner—the last place he’d like to spend his evening. He still didn’t know how he’d face Sam after what happened at lunch.
It was the first time Benji second-guessed his clothes in a while. It hadn’t occurred to him until later in the afternoon that he had been wearing no more than two different outfits since the day Nina died. Not only that, but they were also all the same color scheme of plaid. He switched into a sweatshirt collecting dust in the corner of his room and slipped a few pennies into his pocket for good luck.
They left the house at six thirty. It probably would have been six, had Benji not been stalling. “I don’t get why you’re in such a bad mood today.” Rebecca locked her hands on the steering wheel. “I thought you loved going to the mayor’s place.”
Benji shrugged and stared out the window for the remainder of the trip.
Mrs. Perkins was the one to answer the door. Her white dress hugged her waist and billowed elegantly around her ankles. Most would argue that she was the most elegant woman in town—always pinning her hair in fancy designs and reapplying moisturizer throughout the day. Benji almost wished his mom was as youthful as the mayor’s wife. Rebecca was already showing signs of age, and she was younger than most mothers in Wishville. She also worked harder.
Sam had three brothers, all older than her. One was a senior in high school, and the other two were twins prepping for their junior year. Benji looked up to them. He always wished he had a brother. Or a sister, even. That wouldn’t be all that bad. But it was just him. Just Benji.
“So nice to see you.” Mrs. Perkins set her hands on her cheeks and stepped aside. Her voice went from high to low pitch as she talked, something that seemed to ensnare all she spoke to. She must have adopted her charm from the mayor.
Food was always interesting at the Perkins’ place. Sitting on the table was a heavy bowl of pesto pasta, Benji’s favorite, accompanied with salad and garlic bread. It was rare to find such a meal in Wishville, where all people cared about were clams and fish and seaweed. He wondered why no one hunted seagulls. Those pests were everywhere.
Leaving Wishville Page 7
