He broke away from the kiss, placing sweet pecks along her jawline and down the curve of her neck, quietly savoring the tiny shivers underneath the skin there, wondering how he’d gotten so lucky to share her body again.
She shivered. Her skin was warm to the touch, and his apartment comfortably climate-controlled. Those were shivers of need, and it made his cock throb every time he felt those tiny tremors beneath the press of his lips.
“If that’s the way you truly feel about it, take what you want.”
He sat on the bed, his feet still planted on the floor. His fingers laced with hers, he drew her near until she straddled him. She leaned down, her eyes bright with arousal, her breath deep and steady. Her long braids fell over her shoulders, and he pushed them back behind her ears, needing to see all of her as they connected again.
The sight of her, the feel of her against him made his blood rush through his vessels, leaving him dizzy with need. Like a drug spreading through him, lighting him ablaze from the inside out, she called to something buried so deep inside Jackson, he hadn’t realized it existed.
It reached beyond the disappointment of his broken marriage. It went further than his mother abandoning him. It dug so deep inside him, filling in all the empty spaces that had left him so cold and empty all these years.
He didn’t know how she did it. He didn’t understand what manner of magic she possessed to crack open his chest and find all his hidden spaces without him knowing it. But as her hand gripped him and she slid herself down his corded shaft, drawing him into her center, he willingly submitted to her power.
Where was his fighting instinct? Where was the thing that told him to never yield? Because with each swivel of her hips, Jackson was losing himself, and what was most unnerving about it all was that he didn’t seem to care.
“What have you done to me?”
“Does it really matter?”
She was right. It didn’t. With each snap of her hips, she was bringing him closer and closer to the end his desire sought.
Her muscles clenched him, their rhythm unpredictable as she neared her climax. He wasn’t far behind. The impulse to let go and drop over into satisfaction with her chased him like a relentless foe, demanding that he surrender and give in.
Determined she would be satisfied first, he slowed her motions with a firm hand pressed into her lower back and the other wrapped around her neck, pulling her toward him, latching his mouth to hers, kissing her until his chest was tight with the need to breathe.
He sat up, cradling her in his lap, holding her as she wrapped her legs around his back. When she encircled her arms around his neck, he found his footing, standing, turning them around, and laying her gently in the center of the bed.
She was breathtaking. Large, round breasts, their pert brown peaks begging to be suckled. Her wide, rounded hips were spread, welcoming him back into her warmth, while the brown and pink folds of her slick opening clenched, glistening with want as he positioned himself between her legs, carefully stroking himself.
She was everything he needed. A slight niggle in the back of his mind tried to warn him, tried to remind him that opening himself up to her was a danger he didn’t need. But before the thought could take root, he watched her slide two fingers in her mouth, coating them and slipping them between her swollen folds, rubbing the pink nub protruding there. With each flicker of her fingers over her slick flesh, conscious thought became impossible, and his body went on automatic.
He slid into her opening, loving the sight of her fingers playing in her pussy while he moved in and out of her. He leaned over, bracing his arms on either side of her shoulders to give himself more leverage and stealing another kiss as her moans grew louder and she spilled over into bliss.
He chased her orgasm, slamming into her while her climax crested, and her slick walls grabbed him, demanding he succumb to the need he’d fought since this began.
He tried to fight it, tried to remember that before he’d met her, he used to be a man in control of his own body. But then she licked the carved edge of his jaw and whispered in his ear, “Jackson, please,” and he was lost.
He couldn’t explain it. Nothing about her being in his world beyond her case made sense to him. But as her words traveled through his ears and into his heart, his sac tightened, hitching up higher and higher as his orgasm pulled every drop of his remaining power and released it in the searing first jet of come that ripped through him, tearing a deep howl that climbed from his chest, out through his throat, and into the air.
When his climax ebbed and his lungs and heart fought to regulate his breathing and pulse, he understood two things. The first: because he wasn’t twenty anymore, he would need to sleep long and hard before he could do that again, and second: he would definitely do that again.
* * *
Jackson held Aja as tightly as he could without crushing her. His need to have her skin against his should make him uncomfortable as hell. But instead of discomfort, he felt at ease, soothed in a way one only felt when they were safe. Considering his line of work and the problematic relationships he’d had with women, he couldn’t honestly remember a moment when he felt so certain there wasn’t a threat around the corner.
“I need this.”
Aja looked up at him with confusion in his eyes. That was when he realized he’d spoken aloud.
“Need what?”
He noted the absence of panic in him as he prepared to answer her. Yet another piece of proof Aja had gotten under his skin. “Us.”
“I’m not sure I follow what you’re talking about, Jackson.”
Join the club ’cause I sure as hell don’t get it either.
“Aja, I know I said I wanted to just have fun, to see where this thing between us went. But I don’t think I was being honest with you or myself.”
He felt her tense against him, and he realized this was all about to go sideways if he couldn’t manage to get his foot out his mouth.
“If you’ve changed your mind about this, Jackson, you can say it.”
He saw what looked like sadness dulling her eyes and etching lines into her brow. But even when she thought she was being rejected, she never cowered. Instead, she faced it head on.
“I’ve changed my mind, but not in the way you think,” he said. She squinted up at him, trying to decipher what he meant. “I don’t want casual, Aja. Being with you tonight, doing something as mundane as having dinner in my apartment and making love to you in my bed, it feels right.”
She giggled and let her hand slide beneath the cover until she was cupping him, stirring interest anew in his sleeping cock.
“Of course it feels right. My sex is awesome.”
She said it so matter-of-factly, all he could do was give in to the happy chuckle sitting in his chest.
“I completely agree with that statement, Counselor. But that’s not what I was talking about. I want more of this, Aja. Not just the occasional date and one-off. I want to be with you.”
He could see the moment the realization of what he was saying began to seep in. She retreated out of his embrace and pulled herself against the headboard. He followed suit, needing to make sure they were on equal footing. He needed her to understand they were equals in this decision. This was about what they both wanted, not just his feelings.
“Jackson, I’m enjoying what’s happening between us. But I don’t know if I’m where you are just yet.”
He laced his fingers between hers, needing to reassure her and himself too. “I get that. I completely respect that, and I’m not asking you to declare your undying love for me. I just want you to be open to us becoming more. Can you do that? Let me prove to you I’m the only man you’ll ever need in your life.”
She dropped her eyes, letting them fall to their joined hands. He couldn’t tell from her body language what she was thinking. And if he was honest, her silence
was beginning to worry him. But no matter what her decision, he promised himself he’d respect it.
“Jackson, I don’t know if I’m as certain as you we can make this work. We live ninety minutes away from each other. We’re both so busy with our jobs… How can we do this?”
“Do you want this to work?” he asked.
She looked up at him through her thick lashes. “I do.”
He scanned her face, looking for hesitancy, but he couldn’t find any. That discovery eased the tension he hadn’t even realized he was holding in his chest.
“Then if you want this to work, we will make it work. All I’m asking for is the chance. Will you give me that?”
A slow smile blossomed on her face, and the full apples of her cheeks glowed with a warm blush. “You make it hard for a girl to say no, Ranger.” She let her hand slide down his firm chest, her nails raking against his nipple and sending an instant jolt of desire straight to his dick.
He grabbed her hand and brought it to his mouth for a quick kiss. “You’re avoiding the question, Counselor. But just so you know, if you keep that up, your ability to answer me won’t be the only thing that’s hard around here.”
“Promises, promises.”
“Aja?” Her playful smile tugged at his heart, and he had to fight himself to keep from pulling her beneath him right then and there. “What’s your answer?”
She pulled her bottom lip between her teeth. On anyone else, it would’ve just been an expression of contemplation. But on her, it was a turn-on. His blood ran hot at the thought of what new way she’d find to put those luscious lips to work.
“If you want me, Ranger, I’m yours. But please understand, I’m gonna need us to take this slow.” She cupped his face, allowing her thumb to stroke the stubble of his beard, both comforting him and arousing him at the same time. “I wasn’t secretly searching for a relationship when you walked into my life, Jackson. I’ve got a lot on my plate with the ranch and Pathways. But I’d be lying if I said the idea of having you all to myself doesn’t appeal to me in an instinctive way. If you can handle us taking this painfully slow, I can agree to committing to a relationship with you.”
He wasn’t sure who leaned in first, but the moment those words crossed her lips, his mouth was pressed against hers. Aja Everett had agreed to have him. As far as he was concerned, there was nothing better in the world. And as they sank back into the mattress, he was determined to prove his gratitude and excitement with every lick, touch, and moan he could offer. Not just for her benefit, although making sure she was satisfied in bed was always a top priority for him. No, this was a reverent celebration for him, a mark of the moment his heart had finally thawed all the way through, and it was beating hard and strong for only one woman: Aja.
Chapter 35
Aja made it as far as the edge of Jackson’s bed before he tucked his strong arm around her waist, pulling her back against the solid wall of his chest. “Where are you trying to escape to? I have plans for you that don’t involve either of us getting out of this bed.”
A knowing smile spread across Aja’s lips. If they were anything like the plans he’d had for her last night, Aja was certain she’d enjoy them. “As tempting as that sounds, I have to get back to the ranch.”
Jackson raised his head, placing a quick peck on her cheek. “Because of Seneca and Brooklyn?”
“Yes, but not in the way I think you mean. They’re not on house arrest. They’re not bound to the ranch. They can come and go as they please as long as they show up for work every day.”
He wagged his eyebrows in an over-the-top lecherous way, then nuzzled the delicate skin where her neck and shoulder met. He swiped the tip of his tongue across it, making the nerves come alive. “Then stay.”
Boy, did she ever want to. She loved her ranch, but waking up next to this man with his natural body heat acting as the best blanket was placing a close second to starting the day appreciating the beauty of her land.
“I really can’t. I’m supposed to take Aunt Jo shopping today for the anniversary party we’re having next Saturday. She won’t hear of ordering the groceries online the way I do. She wants to squeeze the produce herself.”
Jackson’s hand slid from her waist, up the soft cushion of her abdomen until his large palm was cupping and kneading the tender flesh of her breasts. “I completely agree with the sentiment.”
“You’re not making this easy, Ranger.”
“I thought you liked it hard.”
“So not what I meant.”
He placed a delicate kiss on her shoulder, meant more to soothe than arouse. But that kiss, coupled with the way his fingers were stroking her nipples, started the first flames of desire in her belly. It wouldn’t take much until she was ready for an encore performance of last night.
“What kind of anniversary party?”
“We’re celebrating Seneca and Brooklyn successfully completing one year of the Pathways program. One more year, and they’ll both have paid their debt to society and will have the ability to go out into the world if they choose to. I still have a long to-do list. If I leave it to Aunt Jo, she’ll shop and cook for half the county.”
He placed another kiss on her shoulder, moving his hand down between her breasts until he was tightening his arm around her waist again. “That might not be such a bad idea. How are things with the town since Bennett’s confession and incarceration?”
She ran light fingers atop his, loving the protective cocoon he was providing her. “On the few occasions we’ve had to go into town since all the craziness ended, people have been quite apologetic. Apparently Eli did his level best to keep anyone from helping us.”
He tugged on her shoulder, and she turned around until they were facing each other. “I know you might have intended for this event to be more intimate. But maybe inviting some of the townspeople could help smooth things over.”
She ran her fingers lightly over her scalp and wondered if there ever would be an opportune moment to come together with the people Eli kept under his thumb.
“You’re right,” she responded. “I know, but…I honestly want to make this meaningful for the two of them. I’m not blaming anyone in town for what Eli did, but having them there, knowing they were his victims too, might make it awkward.”
He gave her an easy smile, his dark-brown eyes gleaming with amusement. “You’re really excited about this, aren’t you?”
“Yeah. Everyone deserves a second chance to get things right. These ladies are working hard to start over. I’m happy to help facilitate that.”
She let her hand slide to the side of his face, smooth brown skin giving way to a dark, groomed beard that tickled the delicate skin of her palm. She smiled again, trying to ignore the swell of emotion in her heart that seemed to grow with abandon whenever she was in his presence. “If they can make this work, anyone can. It means there’s hope for us all to work through our issues and find something better for ourselves.”
His eyes narrowed, and she could see the question forming in their dark depths. Too raw to defend herself against any query his mind was thinking up and too afraid that she’d have to tell him why she needed to cling to that hope of a better tomorrow, she popped a quick kiss on his lips and headed for his bathroom. “Gotta go.”
She leaned behind the closed bathroom door and took a steadying breath. Redemption was around the corner for her wards, and for her. Jackson had asked to be the man in her life last night. A fact she was still processing. But she refused to analyze this to death through the lens of her guilt. No, she would accept this chance at joy, even if she didn’t quite deserve it at this moment.
Old guilt tried to horn its way in on the fragile happiness trying to blossom inside her. But she refused to let it have its way. Instead, she just reminded herself that if she could hold on for a little bit longer, she too might pay the debt that weighed so heavily on h
er soul.
And maybe then she wouldn’t feel like there was an oven timer ticking on every good thing that came into her life. She wouldn’t lie to herself any longer, pretending she could take or leave Jackson’s company. She wanted him, for more than the two nights they’d spent in each other’s arms. And she would give anything to be worthy of him.
You’re almost there, Aja. You’re almost there.
* * *
Jackson pulled up to the front of the main house and cut the engine of his truck. “We’re here.” He didn’t hide the disappointment in his voice. If she would’ve allowed it, he’d have kept her hidden in the cove of his apartment for as long as it took to satisfy his ravenous need for her. She hadn’t allowed it—for good reason—but it still made him ache to return to reality so soon after experiencing the fantasy of Aja Everett in his bed.
He reached over the console and picked up her hand, kissing the back before lacing his fingers through hers. “When can I see you again?”
He marveled at the open mischief swirling in the depths of her dark eyes. “I’m impressed, Ranger. No waiting three days before calling to show interest; you’re making up your own rules to this dating game.”
“I’m too old.” His chuckle sparked one of her own.
“I know that’s right. Forty is knocking on my door.”
“Forty is past the knocking stage. It’s moved in and has its feet up on my couch. But I’m not here to play games. I told you, Aja. I know what I want. When can I see you again?”
She squeezed their linked fingers and smiled. “Please don’t take this as a blow-off, but I really will be busy setting up for the dinner party this week. But I’d love it if you’d attend the celebration.”
“You sure they’d want me there? It’s not like we’re the best of friends. Brooklyn did little more than growl at me while I was here.”
“Brooklyn’s charm is an acquired taste. I’m sure Seneca would love it, though. My aunt and uncle will be there, and even the Sullivans are coming.”
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